Chapter 10

(A/N) This chapter is ENTIRELY from Draco's POV.

Sorry it took almost TWO weeks for this to be posted *sigh*. (I'm still posting the next chapter this weekend.)

Enjoy!

I hated to wait. Just standing –there was no chance I was going to sit on any of those benches– in a crowded room with other poeple. Other very smelly people. A man to my left smelled strongly of alcohol and sweat. If there would have been any other place for me to stand then I would have gone to it already.

Hopefully this will be bloody worth it. It will be, I know it will. It's already been too long since the last time. I suppose I'm just starting to get a little bit restless, is all. Have been waiting here for what feels like a lifetime.

New Year's Eve is this week and I can't believe this year has gone away so quickly. Or so slowly.

Father and Mother wasn't happy when I told them they wouldn't be seeing me at all this winter, they live out in the country, you see. When Black had asked me to babysit the two children for the evening I couldn't resist. I called Mother and told her I had some urgent business I had to attend to and that they would just have to wait a couple of months before they'd see me.

It wasn't the first time I babysat the child. Well, children, it was this time since Black had gotten his hands –oddly enough– on another child. Don't get me wrong, the two men have been amazing with Natalia.

But, as I was saying, it wasn't my first time. The first time, however, I was pretty bad. I had had zero experiences with children since I was an only child and my aunt Bellatrix didn't have any children of her own.

I never had to care about a younger being before Black and Lupin had asked me if I wanted to babysit Natalia for an hour. They paid me for it too, but what can I say? I'd like to believe I handled the screaming being rather well. YouTube helped me with the bloody diapers.

I do, however, believe children should come with an instruction book.

Before Christmas I had babysat the little girl three times, I think. And I believe I'm getting better and better at babysitting.

I picked up a stuffed panda bear in fornt of Natalia while she clapped her hands and smiled a very wet smile. She had saliva running down from her bottom lip to her little, round chin. She muttered something while her eyes gleamed brightly and joyfully.

"Panda", I told her.

"Padu", she said and I let a small smile greet my lips. I dragged my empty hadn over her little head with a grin on my face.

"Do you think they'll be back?" the boy asked me for the umptieth time, he seemed rather nervous and anxious about either having been left by the men or being left by the men with me. Which it was, I was not certain of. I reassured him, of course, and told him they'd come back, because they always come back. That seemed to lighten his spirits. For now.

He crawled closer to Natalia and picked up a little giraffe. The little girl straightened out both her arms towards the boy and the toy as if reaching for them. "Gijap", she muttered with a smile so big and bright it made it impossible not to smile, too.

"Giraffe", I corrected quietly to myself.

When Black and Lupin came home that night, together, they looked at me in an odd kind of way as they found me seated on the living room floor with the kids.

If I hadn't known better I'd say the two men looked almost sorry for me.

When I glanced outside to the car leaving the driveway I knew.

Potter.

And his wife, of course. He had always been married, I knew that and it wasn't like I was telling myself otherwise. For goodness sake he was straight. It would have been so God damn much easier if he hadn't had eyes that green. Or be so bloody heroic all the time. It was sickening. In a cute puppy kind of way. Don't tell anyone I said that.

It is a bit ironic, I believe, that we first met at his wedding

I looked back at the two men, still staring at me, and I rose up to a standing position.

"I see the plan succeeded", I smirked at Black and felt the urgue to pat him on the shoulder. He looked at me with confused eyes before understanding dawned on him. Black turned his head and looked at Lupin with a smile tugging at his lips.

"S´ppose so", Black said, smile evident in his voice. I started feeling like an intruder as the two men seemed lost in each other's gazes. My chest ached for that feeling, to have someone looking at me that way. As if I was a priority and not an option.

I cleared my throat. "It's getting late", I said and the two men turned their attention to me. "I think I should get going".

Black and Lupin nodded at me in understanding and I walked to the hallway. As I slid my warm, black winterjacket Lupin stepped into the hallway, a few paces away from me. He looked at me with eyes that shone with uncertainty. I waited for him to speak first, if he had something to say, that is.

"You do know that Harry's wife's pregnant", the man said. It wasn't a question just merely a statement and I nodded.

"I do."

"I suppose you also know that he is staying with her for the sake of their child". Again, I nodded, feeling something in my chest twinge slightly.

Lupin continued. "He reminds me a lot of his father", the man said with a slightly dreamy expression and smiled, as if remembering something from the past before he focused his gaze once again on me. "When asked to pick between what's right and what's easy they always do what's right in the eyes of someone else. Never the thing that is right for themselves." The man's words were cryptic but wise and I felt like I understood what he was getting at but I still furrowed my brows and narrowed my eyes at him.

"What are you saying?" I asked. Lupin sighed and closed his eyes as if I was nothing but a petulant child.

"What I am saying is that Harry did what was right for the baby, because the baby deserves to grow up with both its parents. He did, however, not do what was right for either Ginny nor himself since he does not love her. But then I ask...", he said and took a second to breathe, presumably for effect before continuing. "Is it the right thing to do, to have a child raised in an environment without love. Surely both Harry and Ginny will love the child, but how will the child learn of the beauty of love when its own parents gave that up for the child?"

I opened my mouth but closed it almost immediately afterwards and then opened it. Again. And closed it. Again.

Something in Lupin's eyes twinkled as he looked at me. "Harry cares about you", he said. "But he's stubborn and he's loyal."

That was the last thing I've heard from the two men since then, it was days ago now but I haven't been able to get the conversation out of my head. Was it supposed to make me feel better? To know that he rather chose a life without love just because of a child? I don't blame him. And what am I even talking about? Love!? What we had wasn't love it was surely nothing but lust, or being trapped in the moment or such! Surely.

We have known each other for, what? Three months? I'm nothing but the mistress, the secret, excitement. I'm nothing.

"There you are!" came the familiar voice that brought me back to reality. "Why can't you just for once wear some colour? It is truly impssible to make you out of all these dark clothed people. Surely they all must be at least a bit depressed." I smiled in spite of myself.

"I've missed you, too, Pansy", I said and she glared at me.

"Well. Of course you have", she said and looked at Blaise who was positioned right next to her.

"Blaise", I greeted and he enveloped me in a hug.

"Dra-co", he said as he patted me on my back a little stiffly.

When the darkhaired man stepped back from me he smiled at me mischievously. I narrowed my eyes at him.

"You know you love me", Blaise said with his charming smile and winked. I rolled my eyes.

"Keep telling yourself that", I said and both of my friends laughed at that, making me smile.

We walked to my car that was parked on the parking lot outside the central station. Pansy and Blaise had taken the train together from London to celebrate New Year's Eve with me. Even though I may not have said it in so many words –and neither had they– it meant a lot to have them here. If nothing else, their company will distract me from thinking about something else.

As I sat down at the driver's seat Lupin's words were again spoken in my head. "Harry cares about you". The words were spoken as if the man was actually present in the car.

Cares about me my arse. I've done loads of one-night-stands. And none of them have mattered so why does it this time? Maybe because it isn't just one night and that I've met the man more than once. He even invited me to his house for dinner! I mean, what was he playing at? I should have declined, I know I should. I just, I've never...

Oh sod it! I am bloody Draco Malfoy, I should have higher standards for myself. I am not someone's option, I'm a bloody priority! And if he rather shag his long time girlfriend turned wife or whatever than he is more than welcome to! And he doesn't deserve me if that's the case, he doesn't deserve my time, my thoughts or my body, and he espescially doesn't bloody deserve me.

"Okay, Draco. Out with it", Pansy said.

I frowned. It was so much easier to get away with my thoughts when I was alone, and didn't have to worry about having a very observant Pansy to the left noticing.

"Leave him be, Pans", came Blaise's noble voice form the backseat. I could imagine Pansy rolling her eyes and then giving him a piercing gaze.

"If he's stressing himself raw about something then it's my honor to make it stop", she said, putting her hand on her chest while sticking her noise into the air.

Both me and Blaise snorted and she sent a glare to both of us. God, was I glad to have them back.

"So tell us why you had that look on your face the whole first ten minutes!" Pansy said exasperatedly, and I sighed. I had almost forgotten her question.

"Is it the dance, did you not get the part?" offered Blaise.

I snorted. God, I hadn't thought about the dance for a long time now, my head was really on something else.

"No", I told them, keeping my eyes on the road ahead so to not give anything away.

"It's a man, isn't it?" Pansy asked, I stiffened and tried to keep my composure as perfect as it usually is. "I knew it!"

"Come on Pansy, you make it sound as if it's a good thing", Blaise said, amusement evident in his voice. Pansy glared at him again.

"Well, Blaise. If anything I'm going to get to hear some juicy details, am I not Drake?" she said and turned her attention back to me. God, I hated that sodding nickname.

I didn't answer her, I just kept my gaze frozen on the road ahead, so to not get into an accident. I heard on the news going home from Black and Lupin that there had been a car accident a bit away but since I didn't take that road I missed the long queue.

"Pans, I think he might be ignoring you", Blaise said and I could imagine how he was holding one hand to the side of his mouth while pointing at me with the other. It almost made me smile. Almost.

"Draco", Pansy tried again. "Tell me about him".

"There's no he to tell about", I said stubbornly. All three of us were well aware that I only got like this, all defensive when there was something I wanted to hide. It's only fair that if he sees me as his secret, that he should be mine as well.

"That only proves my point. Who is he? Is he some posh man in one of these suits, always carrying around a briefcase?" she asked mockingly. Blaise snorted.

"Of course not, Pans!" Blaise said exasperatedly. "A man like that would only remind Draco of his father", he finished and that statement made Pansy giggle.

I rolled my eyes at the pair of them. Father was a businessman, in more ways than one.

"Then what does he do?" Pansy asked and I felt her eyes staring into the side of my face.

I sighed, suddenly feeling the urge to slam something.

"Karate instructor", I muttered silently, glaring at the road.

"What?" Pansy said and I repeated myself.

"A karate instructor". I said it a tad louder this time and I swore she sniggered.

"Well, that's cute", she said and examined her nails feigning disinterest. Blaise chuckled and I snorted.

"I bet he's fit, though. Must have a great body", Blaise teased, letting the "r" in "great" roll from his tongue seductively to tease me. That tosser.

"Indeed, he must. Mustn't he, Draco?" Pansy wiggled her eyebrows and I glared at her.

"Shut up, Pansy", I said in a warning tone.

"That settles it then!" she responded gleefully, well... As gleefully as Pansy could, she usually just pretended not to care. "And what's his name."

"Potter", I said, a small smile tugging at my lips.

"Potter? Details, Draco! I want details!"

"No", I said matter-of-factly, trying to hide an amused smirk when Pansy made a noise that sounded both like a mixture of a sob and a snort.

"You know what that means, Pans", offered Blaise and Pansy giggled.

I glared at the pair of them. "What?" I asked confused. They shared an amused look, eyes crinkled at the sides and mocking smiles.

"You always tell us the dirty details, but now you don't. So is he rich or famous?" Pasny asked.

"What?" I asked again.

Blaise rolled his eyes at me. "You won't tell us, which means you want to keep him a secret, and because you want to keep him a secret there has to be a reason", Blaise smirked, giving me a teasing look.

"So out with it! What is the secrecy for?" Pansy asked and I sighed deeply.

"His wife's pregnant", I said and heard two sharp intakes of breath.

"He's married!" Pansy screeched exasperatedly and stared at me as if I had grown an extra head. Or two. Glad she reacted to the wife part and not the pregnant.

I swallowed thickly and nodded. Suddenly a wave of shame and disappointment poured over me all at once.

"Draco", Pansy said but I pretended I didn't hear her. "Draco", she repeated a bit louder.

"What?" I asked a bit too loud, my voice thich and just a tad hoarse.

"Drive to the downtown", she said and as if knowing I'd ask added, "you need a drink, which means that I need a drink".

The three of us sat by the bar, as fast as we had sat down Pansy announced "tequila". The two of us were pretty affected by the time people started flooding into "Matthew's" the gay club. Blaise stubbornly declined, which was good since he was the only one of the three of us that could drive to my apartment from here.

"Draco, look", Pansy had leant closer to me to whisper. She pointed at something on the dance floor. "That bloke has been eyeing you for the last... I don't know but go do us all a favour". I turned in my seat to take a look at this admirer or whatever. He was skinny, almost fragile-looking, with thick brown hair to his shoulders and a noticeable stubble on his jaw.

I raised a brow at the man before turning back to Pansy. "Not my type", I said and turned back to my bottle of whiskey and took a big gulp.

"Precisely", Pansy said and pointed at me with an almost scary look of mischief. "How else are you planning on getting over this Parker guy, hmm?"

"Potter", I corrected but she just waved her hadn dismissively in the air.

"Details, details. The thing is, Drake, that if you plan on getting your arse over Parker's pretty face, you need someone to fill the void. Have a bit of fun", she said and patted my arm with every syllable. I wasn't sure if she was mad or a genius.

"Take a swig and get your arse over there and make that schoolboy's wildest fantasies come true", Blaise said with a smirk and winked at me.

Well this was it then? My alcohol affected brain pulled the bottle of whiskey to my lips, almost painfully, and took a mouthful of the liquid before putting the bottle down and making my appearance on the dancefloor.

The skinny, stubbled man met me halfway, a playful smile gracing his pouty, pink lips.

"See something you like?" the bloke said and looked at me intently, his deep, blue eyes were gleaming. That line, really? I mean really, that's just pathetic!

I looked him up and down, he wore a long sleeved, dark green shirt rolled up to his elbows and dark, tight –very tight, indeed– trousers.

"Perhaps", I teased with a smirk and tilted my head to the side. "It depends", I added. God! Was I that out of the game? I used to be a natural at this, feigning disinterest, waving the boys off until I could claim my price. That was, however, a couple of years ago now. Before University happend.

Instead of responding the bloke licked his lips and I could do nothing but stare as that pink tonguemade its appearance. I shivered slightly as my head was filled with pictures and fantasies.

Ladies and Gentlemen, he had a forked tongue. Did you hear me? A forked tongue! Imagine being intimate with someone with a forked tongue. The thought made me shiver.

A chuckle escaped those pouty, pink lips and the tongue went into its cave once again. I looked up to meet his very teasin eyes and his smirk could almost rival mine. Almost.

The man turned around and started walking towards one of the toilet, not even looking over his shoulders to see if I would follow. Which I did. Looking back at this now I'm almost embarrased how bloody easy it was for him! A Malfoy is not easy. Hell! I'm not easy!

As I stepped into the toilet I saw the man entering a cubicle, before closing the door behind him he winked at me. I swallowed, brushing aside a feeling of unease in the pit of my stumach that I didn't understand why I had it. I had never felt unease before. At least not when it comes to this.

I opened the door to the cubicle which was unlocked –obviously– and went inside. The bloke leaned against one of the walls right inside. I closed the door behind me and locked.

As if on cue the man pulled himself from the wall, straightened his posture and walked closer to me.

"Decided to come, did you?" he asked but it was more of a plain statement as he smirked at me with that infuriating glint in his eyes. I tried to ignore the sexual innuendo.

"Why, did you miss me?" I asked and tilted my head to the side. God, I was pathetic.

He didn't respond to that, he set about ravishing my mouth instead, which was fine, of course. Just fine.

More than bloody fine, to be honest.

The man stared into my eyes for a while and I could swear his deep, blue eyes turned an amazing shade of green.

The press of his lips against mine and the way they pushed my mouth open I felt the absent of something but I couldn't decide what it was so I closed my eyes.

A forked tongue slid into my mouth and I gasped as it started teasing and playing and dancing with mine.

Potter pushed me against one of the walls and held me in place by my shoulders. Our lips moving intensely in unison. It was messy. I had both my hands examing his body, dragging up his shoulders, down his back, feeling the roundness of his arse and the sofness of his hair.

It was passionate and erotic and arousing and unbelievable. It's been too long, Potter. It's been too bloody long.

His hands went from my shoulders and down my chest until it came to the bottom of my shirt. His hands slid up my chest, tickling the skin as it moved and it made me gasp into his mouth. After a while of hands traveling and touching my abdomen I felt them go lower again. One hand teased the edge of the waistband and dipped beneath it a couple of times before both hands started working on my buttons.

I don't remember when I last gave up control on a situation like this. I've mostly been the dominant one, the one in charge, having everyone playing by my rules. I must have been desperate to let him take control of me. There was, however, no one I'd rather give control to than him. The weird thing was though that I had no bloody idea as to why.

He slipped my trousers down my legs, placed his palm right onto my erection that was only shielded by a thin layer of cotton. I made a sound which was somewhere between a moan and a gasp. Potter bent down to his knees so that his head was in level with my very interested cock.

My pants was reunited with my trousers by my calves. My breath hitched as a hand wrapped itself around my rockhard cock. I tilted my head backwards so that it was leaning to the wall. My pulse was quickening, my breathing ragged, deep and hitched. My body gave in to the pure sensations of what was going to come. Which was me, by the way.

But not yet.

I felt the flick of two tongues on the head of my cock, it took me a while to remember that it's just one, it's just one, it's just one.

I don't remember you having a forked tongue, Potter. The tongue then proceeded to lick the underside of my cock and it made me shiver. It's been so bloody long.

"You taste gorgeous", the man said and it snapped me back to reality. A stranger was kneeling in fornt of me, deep, blue eyes staring into mine and a word echoed in my head almost giving me a headache. WRONG!

It was wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong!

I pushed the man away, bent down to drag my pants and trousers back up to my waist before sliding out of the cubicle and fleeing the toilet.

"I've always, always, done one-night-stands! What the bloody hell has happend to me!?" I asked tensely, head resting in my hands, elbows on the table in my apartment. After I had fled the scene we went straight to my apartment, not even sharing a word in the process.

Pansy patted my back tenderly. "Potter, happend", she whispered. A couple of seconds later she snatched her hand away as if burned. I turned schocked eyes to her and found she was staring intently at Blaise.

"What?" I hissed at Pansy whose eyes were as big as saucers and her whole demeanor was stiff.

"I know how we'll get you your Prince Charming back", she announced.