Disclaimer: The Kross Kings do not own Naruto or My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic

Why We Fall

2: Apples, Diamonds and Pinkie, Oh My!

Moments later, with everyone gathered around the table, Applejack looked at her family.

"So, which of y'all would like to tell me the hay is going on here?!"

"AJ, meet our new farm-hoof," Granny Smith said with a smile to the family's guest. "He was recommended by your little friend Rainbow Dash."

Applejack raised a brow. "He knows Rainbow Dash?"

"Eeyup," Big Mac said with a smirk. "Intimately."

"Shut up, Mac." Naruto hissed while Applejack's cheeks flushed. The orange stallion looked at the 'head' of the house. "Don't listen to him. Dash crashed into me. That's all."

"...Bout to say that seemed a bit unlike her to, uh, ...But anyway, yeah, that sounds like Dash." Applejack said with a nod. She fixed a small look on her brother. "Doesn't tell me why he's here."

"Mister Naruto's saddlebag broke. It's gettin' fixed up by Rarity," Applebloom said. She smiled at her sister. "He's been stayin' here n' helpin' us in return for a place t' sleep 'til it's all fixed up."

"Really?" Applejack asked, her eyes still averted from her fellow orange coated pony.

"...Can I go finish my shower yet or...?"

"You can wait a bit longer." Granny Smith chided. The stallion sighed and propped his damp head on the table while he poked at the steamed carrot set before him. Granny smith then glanced at her flushing granddaughter with a small smirk on her face. She leaned over and whispered into her granddaughter's ear. "Don't think I don't know what you're thinkin', AJ."

"Wha-! Granny!" The atomic blush that spread across Applejack's face made her grandmother laugh.

"It's alright now, sugarcube," the old mare gave her a wink. "Granny's thinkin' it, too. This 'n reminds Granny of your Grampa Smith."

Applejack looked ready to faint, barf, or perform a bizarre mixture of both upon being given that disturbing thought.

"Anyways," Big Mac cut in, unknowingly getting Applejack's endless gratitude for drawing her attention away from their grandmother. "Root apple bucks like a pro, Sis. We've got nearly double our regular product than with just my usual output."

The cow-mare paused and gave Naruto a once over - and not in the way Granny Smith meant! He was certainly built strong, that was for sure, but he seemed to be built a bit more lean than muscular like Big Mac. Her eyes must've lingered a bit because a cough from Granny Smith snapped her attention back to the table. A smirk on Granny Smith's face made Applejack's cheeks burn again.

"That's mighty praise from you, Mac." Applejack mused as she forced down the small blush on her face. "Still, Ah think we best give Rarity a lil' nudge, she can be a bit absent minded at times. We'll give her a push after Ah get some shut eye."

"Right," Naruto nodded in agreement. "Uh, as for my shower?"

Applejack groaned and flushed at the memories that his question brought forth. "Yeah, but make it quick, partner."

"Thank you!" Naruto beamed and bolted for the bathroom.

"So," Granny Smith asked. "What'd you like best?"

"Granny!" Applejack flushed again. "C'mon, is now really the time for that?!"

"She's right, Granny Smith." Big Mac nodded. Applejack's gratitude towards her brother vanished with his next words. "Least wait 'til we put 'Bloom to bed 'fore you grill AJ."

"What are you guys talkin' bout?" Applebloom asked with a frown as she looked up from her dinner.

"Never you mind, Sugarcube." Granny Smith smiled at the youngest Apple in the house. "Eat up, now. You've class in the morning."

"Yes, Granny Smith..."

With the shower incident (hopefully) behind them, Naruto and Applejack headed out the next morning into Ponyville. As the orange colored ponies made their way to the Carousel Boutique, the two made idle conversation.

"So... Mac told me you travelled a lot before you came to Ponyville. Where've ya been?" Applejack asked curiously.

"Oh, you know. A little here, little there. Been to Yakyakistan once. Very cold." Naruto answered. And illegal, since Yakyakistan had yet to open its borders to Equestria once more. He then fell victim to a scowl. "Then there was this one time I stumbled across a dragon migration. Bunch of juvenile jerks that needed some good ole fashioned hoof-to-jaw therapy."

"You've fought dragons?" Applejack asked incredulously.

"I beat dragons." Naruto corrected. Well, at least the ones that were just barely larger than he was. He wasn't going to stupidly tango with the elder dragons. ...Well, not after the last time he tried when he was a colt. ...He was not much of a bright colt.

"Ah see." The doubt was clear in her voice, but Naruto let it go. It was definitely a 'You had to be there' sort of thing. A moment of silence filled them again, something Naruto was comfortable with, since he'd become accustomed to it on his journeys.

"So where you from?" Applejack pried.

"...Near the border of Equestria. It's a small village that isn't even on a map. Nothin' worth mentioning," Naruto said after a moment. He was careful to avoid specifying which border.

"Really now?" Applejack asked dubiously. His pause had struck a chord with Applejack, one that sounded very off key. Blue eyes drifted down to meet her gaze.

"You're a very curious mare."

"Ah've been told that a good host should get to know their guests," Applejack said, her scrutinous gaze locked on the orange stallion. "And we Apples are nothin' if not good hosts."

"Eyup." Naruto drawled playfully.

"...Ah admit, you picked that up faster than ah thought you would."

"I live to learn."

"Oh, ah'm sure." Applejack said as she saw that they were coming up on Rarity's place. "Well, let's see 'bout that bag of yours."

"After you," Naruto said, gesturing with his hoof. The last time he came to pester Rarity he almost wound up becoming the unicorn's personal styling manequine. Those scissors got too close to his mane for his liking. He liked his mane the way it was, thank you very much!

Even if it was a so-called rat's nest.

Applejack shook her head and walked into the boutique. With keen eyes, she spotted the white unicorn, who seemed to be deep in thought. Applejack wondered what her friend would be so deep in thought about as she walked up to the mare and gently jostled her by placing a hoof on Rarity's shoulder.

"Uh, Rarity? You alright in there?" Applejack asked. Her voice made the the sophisticated mare jump in alarm as she was startled out of her thinking process.

"Ahh! Oh, Applejack, dear, don't do that!" Rarity said with a frown while the farm mare snickered.

"Sorry." Applejack smiled. She rubbed the back of her neck with her hoof. "So, Ah was wondering if ya managed t' finish that stallion's bag yet?"

"Hm?" Rarity asked. "Which stallion?"

"...The new stallion." Applejack drawled slowly, a brow raised. Rarity wasn't normally this absent minded, especially when Applejack takes the time to come visit, which in itself was a rarity for Rarity.

If Applejack wasn't alarmed before, she was when Rarity flushed lightly. "Ah, yes, him, well...To be quite honest with you, Applejack, I've been unable to find time to work on it."

"...Rarity, Ah reckon you might be lyin' t' me." Applejack frowned. The unicorn recoiled from her in shock.

"W-What?" Rarity sputtered for a moment. She recollected herself, waved a hoof at the farmer and let out a scoff. "Oh, puh-lease! Applejack, there is no pony that is more professional than moi. Why, you can ask anyone of my clients-!"

"Oh, great." Applejack groaned and dropped her head into her hoof. "You've done it again...One glance and you're smitten like a filly, aren't ya?"

"...Smitten is so...accusing."

"That ain't a denial, Rarity." Applejack drawled. She rubbed her face while the unicorn flushed. "I swear, anytime a half-decent lookin' stallion comes into town…"

"Half-decent? Applejack, have you seen this stallion?" Rarity sighed and her eyes drifted to stare at the wall.

"More than Ah'd have liked..." Applejack mumbled. She felt her cheeks heat up and glanced away from Rarity as the unicorn continued.

"He looks like he was sculpted by diamonds," she said. Blue eyes glanced at the orange coated mare, a coy smile on her face. "And you know how I get around diamonds, dear."

"...Now ya just had t' go and make it weird," Applejack said as the heat in her cheeks swiftly disappeared.

"You say weird, I say fabulous."

"Can't ya just fix up his darn saddlebag?!" Applejack snapped.

"You are awfully touchy today." Rarity drawled, looking at Applejack. "Something happen?"

"No," Applejack said quickly. Rarity smirked and not for the first time, the farming mare cursed her honest nature. "Well, maybe...yeah…"

"And that is?" The unicorn fished eagerly. She smiled widely when Applejack fixed her with a glare. That was a sign that something really interesting happened.

"It ain't none of your business."

"Oh, but now I must know!" Rarity pouted. "I have a need! A gossip need!"

"Well, you'll just have t' go without!" Applejack growled. "Just work on that bag!"

"But I'm busy!"

"No, ya ain't, ya fibber!"

"That is a scandalous accusation, hm!" Rarity sniffed and tossed her nose in the air. "I'm going to have to take a break to unwind from all this abuse on my character. Ta-ta!"

Applejack couldn't even get a word in before Rarity trotted past her and went outside where Naruto was. Applejack just barely heard the mare ask him if he'd join her for lunch. The stallion was completely blindsided by the question and faltered for words. Rarity did as she did best and pushed the guy into a corner, repeatedly asking him until he was forced to ultimately accept just so she'd leave him be.

"Why that prissy little whiner." The farm mare muttered, a scowl on her face. She stormed out of the boutique, intent on giving Rarity a piece of her mind. Applejack stood outside Carousel Boutique, her head turning this way and that in order to find the unicorn and her farm-hoof. While she did this, a streak of blue zoomed towards her, kicking up dust.

"Hey! My hat!" she cried out when Rainbow Dash landed next to her, wearing her hat. Rainbow Dash glanced up at the new accessory and then grinned at the earth pony.

"Howdy partner," She said, with a tip of the hat, doing her best to imitate the orange mare.

"Funny, Dash," Applejack said dryly. "Real funny. Ya got me up in stitches."

"Well aren't you a bundle of Celestia's Sunshine." Rainbow Dash mumbled before she tossed the hat back to the owner, who caught it with her tail and set it on her head. The pegasus smiled. "Welcome back, AJ! Pinkie's going to throw a party for you once she finds out."

"I was only gone a week." Applejack mumbled.

"This is Pinkie, remember?"

"Yeah, right." Applejack mumbled while she looked around. She frowned when she realised that she'd lost Rarity and Naruto. "Dang nabbit."

"What is it?"

"Ah lost Rarity and that new feller."

"New 'feller'? You mean Naruto?" Rainbow Dash arched a brow. Applejack nodded and then paused. She turned and gave Rainbow Dash a dirty look before she poked the Pegasus in the side.

"Ow! What? Mac says he's been doing wonders!" Rainbow Dash complained, "You should be thanking me for my insight!"

"Next time you want to offer up a hired-hoof for Sweet Apple Acres, you'd better clear it with me first." Applejack grumbled.

"I think the family can run the farm without you for one decision...or do they ask you when they get a glass of water?"

"Funny, very funny. Darn near gave myself a heart attack when I walked up and found some strange stallion in mah-Er, I mean, tell me first next time," Applejack said as she caught herself. She began to trot off in embarrassment, leaving a confused pegasus behind her.

"Wait, a stallion in where?" Rainbow Dash stared at the fleeing Earth Pony. Magenta eyes narrowed. "Oh, no you don't, AJ. Get back here and tell me what happened!"

Applejack broke into a gallop, kicking up a large dust cloud as she tore through the town in an effort to lose the cyan pony. Green eyes looked back and met with determined magenta.

"It weren't nothin' y'all need to worry about!" She hollered over her shoulder.

"You're not sweet-talking your way out of this one, Sugarcube!" Rainbow Dash returned as she sped up, a rainbow-colored trail manifesting behind her. They rounded a corner and nearly bowled over a small family of pegasi walking through the town, a gamboge filly watched her fly by in awe, before she was called on by her mother.

"It ain't none of your business, Rainbow Dash! Let it lie!"

"I'm making it my business, AJ!" Rainbow Dash shot back. "Now just stop and talk to me or I'm gonna tackle you! You can't outrun me, AJ!"

Applejack grimaced. Rainbow Dash was gaining on her. She could see Sweet Apple Acres in the distance. If she could hop the fence, she could lose the pegasus in the orchard. Unfortunately, Applejack underestimated just how fast Rainbow Dash was.

The cyan pegasus stayed true to her word and tackled the orange mare. They tumbled to a stop just outside Sweet Apple Acre's fenceline. Rainbow Dash sat smugly on Applejack's back, her forelegs crossed over her chest.

"Told you that you couldn't outrun me." The pegasus bragged. She leaned down and looked the apple farmer dead in the eye. "So, where did you find a stallion when you got home?"

Applejack just groaned. She blamed Rarity for this whole mess.

"Trust me darling, Sugar Cube Corner is one of the best sweet shops you'll ever find in Equestria!" Rarity said with a bright smile.

"I don't know," Naruto said doubtfully as the unicorn that was holding his saddlebags hostage tried to coerced him into a lunch. He thought Applejack was supposed to clear this whole mess up. How did he wind up being asked out to lunch? Pushing these thoughts to the side, Naruto continued his earlier thought. "I've been to a lot of places. I've had a lot of exotic sweets and treats."

"Yes, but did any of those places have a Pinkie?" Rarity asked, a coy smile on her face. Naruto looked at her with a raised brow.

"...A what?" he asked.

"Didn't think so." Rarity nodded smugly. She gave him a dazzling smile. "Take it from me, the Cakes give their sweets the perfect bezaz."

"Well, I do like a good bezaz." Naruto rubbed his chin with his hoof. "Almost as good as ramen…"

"Excellent, then off we go!"

With that, they walked into towards the sweets shop just around the corner. As soon as they entered, Naruto excused himself to the little colts room. When nature called, he answered - And no, he wasn't talking about pegasi. He was a wild stallion. Born free. No mare was going to tame him...while he was still this young anyway.

Naruto entered the bathroom while he whistled a small tune and went to a stall. He locked the door behind him with his tail and relaxed in the solitude that one could only have in a bathroom. Just as he was about to lift the seat, a head popped out of the hole.

"Hi!" A mare's voice escaped the pink coated pony. Her eyes were blue and her mane was a darker pink. A smile was on her face...as were a snorkel and goggles. Naruto's brain short circuited for a second before he finally reacted.

"Ahh! Toilet ninja!" Naruto cried out. He quickly backpedaled out of the stall, knocking down the locked door in the process.

"Ahh! Where?!" The pink mare asked as she jumped out of the toilet, perfectly dry, and stood beside him. She had her hooves up defensively and stood on her hind legs.

"You!" Naruto shouted and pointed a hoof at her.

"...I'm a ninja?!" The mare blinked, her eyes crossed as she tried to focus on the hoof pointed at her face.

"Yes...A toilet ninja." Naruto frowned. "Whoa, déjà vu..."

"I'm a toilet ninja?!"

"What are you doing in here? This is the stallion's room! You're a mare! ...And how did you even come out from there?" Naruto asked with a hiss. There were so many things wrong with the mare's choice of entry, but high among them was that it was disgusting. And he'd been eaten by a giant snake once, so he'd know. For the record, it was not a pleasant experience and he does not recommend it. Naruto shook the memory back to the depths of his mind and glared at the mare. "Who are you?!"

"Me? I'm Pinkie Pie! Nice to meet you!" The mare, Pinkie Pie, smiled at him. She then pursed her lips and narrowed her gaze. Pinkie Pie leaned closer to Naruto and sniffed him curiously. Then, she walked all around him, investigating him with furrowed brows. Next, she plucked one of his hairs and licked it, before she popped it in her mouth and chewed it. She spat the hair out and gasped in horror with her hooves pressed against her cheeks. One hoof pointed at him.

"By Celestia's big disco ball in the sky, I don't know who you are!" She exclaimed.

"I'm new...And that doesn't exactly tell me why you're in the stallion's restroom." Naruto drawled.

Pinkie ignored him and dove back into the toilet, nearly completely submerged if not for a giant clump of her poofy mane. A hoof popped out of the bowl and flushed it. It swirled around and waved at him once more before it disappeared into the recesses of the plumbing. Naruto stared at the toilet bowl, and slowly walked backwards out of the restroom. He no longer had to go, nature had packed its bags and ran the heck away.

"...Just pretend it never happened, Naruto. Repress. Repress." He kept telling himself that until he backed into the door. Then, he turned around and walked back out towards Rarity with a haunted look in his eye.

"What the heck is wrong with the ponies here?" Naruto mumbled to himself under his breath. "First Rainbow Dash and now that...Pinkie Pie -No! Repress! Repress. Repress. Repress."

Naruto closed his eyes as he mumbled the mantra. Get ahold of yourself, Naruto. Those are only two of the many pretty mares here. What are the odds that they're all crazy? You're just letting the Nara paranoia get to you.

"Are you okay, dear?" Rarity's voice made him open his eyes to meet her concerned ones.

"Repress." That didn't exactly help with the concerned look the unicorn was sending his way.

"What?"

"Oh! Hey, Rarity, sorry...Um, what was I doing?" he asked sheepishly.

"Going to the gentlecolts room?" Rarity said unsurely. Naruto's eyes went wide once more.

"Repress."

"What?"

"Nothing!" Naruto said quickly as he reverted to normal and gave the seamstress a smile. "So, about my bag..."

"Ah, ah, ah." Rarity smiled and led him over to one of the tables designed for two. "Always have some food before business, darling."

"...Fair enough," Naruto said as he sat down and hung his head slightly. He ordered a shake while Rarity asked politely for a Sundae.

"Hm, I wonder where Pinkie is? I could've sworn she was on shift today." Rarity hummed while looking around.

"Repress." Naruto stared at his menu and whispered to himself. "Repress."

"What was that?"

"Nothing! So, uh..." Naruto paused. Okay, small talk. I can do this. At least she isn't smacking my head with her hoof, that's a good plus so far.

"How are the Apples treating you?" Rarity kindly started for him, a curious smile on her face.

"Oh, they're real nice. Mac's sort of quiet, but I learned to not ever let him fool you. He has a cruel sense of humor and a sharp wit behind that laid back drawl. Applebloom's a sweet little filly and Granny Smith is nice, if not a little weird."

"Granny Smith is weird?" Rarity asked, befuddled by the description.

"Well, she's always just kind of staring at me with a smile." Naruto paused here and furrowed his brow. He always felt unnerved by Granny Smith's smile when he caught her staring at him. It was like she was planning something. He shook it off and smiled. "...Anyway, I met Applejack last night. Wish that kind of went better. She walked right in when I was using the shower of all things. Really, what did Granny Smith teach her and Applebloom. I mean, I was taught to knock before entering. But anyway, then she calls for a house meeting, because apparently she didn't get the memo-"

"Pause!" Rarity demanded, her blue eyes a fiery flame. "Applejack did what?"

"...Walked in on me while I was in the shower? I mean, she didn't see anything. I like very hot showers." Naruto shrugged. "Steam made it hard to see who it was at first."

...And she has the gall to call moi a silly filly! That sneaky little-oh! It. Is. On! Rarity thought determinedly while she was served her Sundae and Naruto was given his milkshake. Her horn lit up and she used telekinesis to lift the spoon to her mouth while she strategized around this development.

She does know I can see and hear her cackling deviously, right? Naruto wondered while he sipped his shake and watched the unicorn warily. What the hay is wrong with mares in this town?

"So, you just barged in like you own the place."

"Ah do own the place!"

"No, you don't. Technically, Granny Smith does."

"Semantics!" Applejack snapped with a twitch in her brow. A snicker passed Rainbow Dash's lips.

"And…" Rainbow Dash stifled a snort and tried to restrain her smile. "And then you caught him like something out of one of Rarity's romance novels?"

"...Ah wouldn't exactly put it in those words." Applejack flushed. "But, uh, for lack of, uh, better description, yeah."

A beat of silence passed before Rainbow Dash burst into laughter. She wrapped her forelegs around her gut and she fell sideways to the ground. Applejack scowled at the pegasus, her cheeks burning, and looked away with a grunt.

"Aw, shut up."

Rainbow Dash either didn't hear her or didn't care. She simply continued to laugh for what felt like an eternity to Applejack, but in reality was only ten or so minutes. Fed up with the laughter at her expense, Applejack cuffed the cyan mare on the head, which earned her a yelp.

"Try to breathe, Sugarcube." The orange mare grumbled.

"S-Sorry," Rainbow Dash said with a small smile as she wiped a tear out of her eye. "Once Rarity finds out, she's going to go into one of those moods again."

"That ain't gonna happen because she ain't ever gonna find out," Applejack said sternly with narrowed eyes. Rainbow Dash lifted her hooves up defensively.

"Right, right, my lips are sealed." She promised with a motion that went with the words. Magenta eyes blinked and a smile crossed the pegasus' face again. "But what if Naruto tells her?"

"...Dang nabbit!" Applejack said as the horror dawned on her. She turned and ran back towards town. "That varmint better not!"

Rainbow Dash got back to her hooves and quickly flew after her. Once she was flying alongside her friend, the Pegasus grinned. "Ten bits says he already let it slip!"

"It ain't funny, Dash!" Applejack snapped, her face ablaze.

"My funny bone begs to differ!"

"Well tell it to see a doctor!"

"That was a very good meal, a lot of bezaz," Naruto said as he and Rarity walked. He covered his mouth with his hoof and burped. He gave the unicorn an apologetic smile. "Pardon me. My stomach wanted to share its opinion."

Rarity giggled. "Well, I did try to tell you darling. You should have more faith in moi."

"I'll keep that in mind. So, shall I walk you home?" Naruto asked.

"Oh my, what manners!" Rarity smiled. "I'm a big girl, though. The offer is sweet, but unneeded."

"Fair enough," Naruto said with a chuckle. He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "To be honest, I'd probably get us lost. I haven't been in town all that much."

"Oh? Do the Apples keep you locked away?" Rarity asked, a small gleam in her eyes. Naruto missed it entirely, his gaze was already soaking in Ponyville's thriving marketplace.

"If by that you mean work me to the bone until I can barely walk into the house, then yes." Naruto hung his head slightly. If only I didn't leave the Key in my saddlebag before I handed it over to Rarity. Then I wouldn't be so hindered by the restrictions. First thing I do when I get my bag back is turn them off.

"You poor dear. Perhaps I should have a word or two with Big Mac before I get back to my own work." Rarity mused, though her intent was not to speak with the lone stallion of the farming family. The fashionista unicorn had a few choice words for the orange cowpony. Walking in on a stallion such as the one beside her and then having the nerve to call Rarity's admiration silly!

"Oh, you don't have to-"

"Non, it'd be rude of me to leave you to wander around aimlessly," Rarity said with a smile.

"Well...Alright. After all, who am I to complain for having to spend more time with a pretty mare?" Naruto asked with a small grin.

"Flatterer!" Rarity smiled, swatting his shoulder gently.

"I speak nothing but the tru-Oof!" Naruto was cut off as a cyan pegasus slammed into him. Once more on his back with the familiar rainbow colored mane in his face, the stallion could only snort steam out his snout. He'd quickly gained a twitch in his eye. "Rainbow Dash..."

"Heya, Naruto! How's it going?" Rainbow Dash asked with a grin on her face.

"You ran into me. Again." Naruto drawled. He blinked and grimaced. "I think you might've dislocated something."

"...At least I didn't ruin your saddlebags again."

"Get. Off. Me."

"Right." Rainbow Dash quickly hopped off the stallion and laughed sheepishly. Naruto got back to his hooves and glowered at the pegasus. Rainbow Dash just grinned at him. "Think of it this way, you must be a magnet for awesome."

"...Don't make me kick you to the other side of town." Naruto warned. "Because it wouldn't be the first time I did that to someone."

"There you are!" Applejack said as she skid to a stop right next to the three, her breathing haggard. Green eyes glared at her fellow orange coated pony. "Ah got a mighty big bone to pick with you, mister."

"Applejack!" Rarity frowned at the mare. "You shouldn't be so rude to him. Not after what you did to the poor dear this morning!"

Rainbow Dash looked at Applejack, "So, can I get those bits now or-?"

"Dash!" The rancher growled.

"Right, later, I'll hold you to it!"

Applejack looked at Rarity firmly, but the flushed cheeks didn't help intimidate her. "Nothin' happened, so stop weavin' them lil' dramas in your noggin 'fore you get the wrong idea."

"D-Dramas?!" Rarity cracked, her eyes narrowed. "You've gone too far!"

"Getting kinda dramatic there, Rare." Rainbow Dash muttered. Naruto just gave her a look. "What? Oh, c'mon, dude, I'm not dramatic."

"Uh-huh, sure."

"Rainbow Dash, sweetie, shush." The fashionista said in a calm yet firm tone.

"Called it. I knew she'd get in one of those moods after she found out what happened this morning."

"I said shush, Rainbow Dash!" "Rain, shut yer trap 'fore Ah do it for ya!" Rarity and Applejack snapped at the pegasus before they glared at each other. Lightning danced between their eyes.

"Um, maybe we should head back to the farm?" Naruto suggested. He backed away when the two mares glanced at him. Not wanting to become the focus of their ire, he added, "Or not. Whatever you gals want works for me."

"I'm up to go hang out at Sweet Apple Acres!" Rainbow Dash raised her hoof.

"Rainbow, my home ain't a hangout for you to laze about." Applejack said on reflex.

"Yeah, don't you have clouds for that?" Naruto asked, half-playfully and half-seriously. One of his old buddies back home used to watch pegasi with envy, being able to nap on clouds.

"Well duh, of course I do. But nothing beats a good nap right under an apple tree." Rainbow Dash said with utmost seriousness.

"...By Celestia, I think I found his long lost multicolored twin." Naruto mumbled in a mixture of shock, awe, disbelief and horror. As long as she doesn't turn out to be a super genius, I think I'll survive.

Applejack sighed tiredly and dropped her glare-off with Rarity. "Forget it, Ah've been runnin round all day. Let's just head back home, Naruto."

"Not without me!"

"Rarity, not now!"

"I say now!" The white mare huffed. The two business owners argued back and forth while they made their way towards Sweet Apple Acres. Naruto looked at Rainbow Dash and nodded in the two mares' direction.

"Are they always like this?"

"Meh," The rainbow mare shrugged. "You get used to it."

"There! We're back, and Ah'm goin' right to my room t' get some sleep. Ah got t' get back to work tomorrow," Applejack said as she walked up to the front door of the farmhouse and pushed it open.

"Well, that's fine. I'll be here, keeping your guest company as a good hostess should. Tootles!" Rarity waved off the orange coated mare with her hoof.

"Uh, Rarity, you do know that there's two of us, right?" Rainbow Dash asked.

"Hm? Oh, yes of-!" Rarity was cut off as the Apple's house suddenly illuminated brightly. It was so bright that Applejack stumbled out with her foreleg over her eyes.

"AHH! What in tarnation-!?" She cried out irritably. Naruto and Rainbow Dash hurried over to the cowpony's side and then helped her to her hooves. The lights dimmed and a familiar pink pony popped up in the doorway, with a good dozen other ponies behind her. The sight of her made Naruto's eyes dilate in apprehension and fear.

"SURPRISE!" Pinkie Pie cried out. "Welcome back Applejack and her new special somepony, Naruto!"

"...I knew it!" Rarity shouted, pointing an accusing hoof at Applejack. "This was your plan all along!"

"W-Wha?! Ahh! What's goin on?!" Applejack stammered, lost and confused outside her own home. She was grabbed by a foreleg and dragged inside. "Hey! What're-Pinkie Pie, leggo!"

"For she's a jolly sweet pony, for she's a jolly sweet pony, for she's a jolly sweet pony-y-y...That nopony can deny!" Pinkie Pie and the guests cheered. Rainbow Dash, not one to skip out on a good time, pushed Naruto in the house, forming two grooves in the ground when his legs refused to move, and Rarity followed right behind her.

"Repress. Repress. Repress." Naruto mumbled like a mantra.

"Dude, seriously, what's the big deal? ...Ohh." Rainbow Dash saw the banner that was hung in the Apple's living room. 'Welcome Home Apple-To!' it read, with streamers and balloons painted on it. Rainbow Dash tilted her head. "Apple-to?"

"I told you we should've gone with Naru-Jack!" A pony in the background declared.

"Everypony is a critic…" Pinkie Pie pouted. She shook it off and grinned. "Congrats, Applejack! I was so happy when I heard! No wonder I didn't see him before he came into the Sweet Shop Corner today!"

"Oh, you've got to be yankin' my tail…" Applejack mumbled as she took in the decorations.

"Congrats, Root. Welcome to the family," Big Mac said with an easygoing smile on his face and a mischievous gleam in his eye. He mosied on over and bumped shoulders with the blond maned stallion. Naruto merely continued to repeat his mantra under his breath.

"...You did this on purpose." Applejack accused her brother.

"Eeyup."

"...They won't find yer body."

"Worth it."

"Repress." Naruto droned out until Big Mac cuffed his head. The orange stallion put a hoof on his head and winced. "Ow! Mac! Did I do something to deserve that?!"

"Eeyup."

"What was it?"

Big Mac just glanced at his sister, who had a livid look on her face, before he looked back at Naruto with a small smirk. "Ignoring yer new 'sweetheart'."

"Ah'm gonna tan yer hide in the square, McIntosh Apple." Applejack growled as she stomped towards her brother with murder in her eye. Naruto took a good few steps away from the larger stallion. He knew that gleam and he the last thing he wanted was for it to be aimed at him.

"That's brilliant, Applejack!" Pinkie Pie cheered as she latched onto the orange coated mare's flank. "Conga, everypony!"

"Not now, Pinkie!" Applejack protested as she tried to advance on her brother and remove the party pony from her flank simultaneously.

"But Conga~!" Pinkie Pie sang out and pushed Applejack forward as ponies formed a chain behind her.

"Gr, Ah'll get ya fer this, McIntosh! Ah swear it on my hat!"

"A mighty fine hat it is…" Big Mac tilted his head thought and then shrugged. He waved a hoof at his sister. "Enjoy the conga, Sis."

"Mac, trust me when I say that you're poking the Ursa Major." Naruto told the red stallion. He watched Rainbow Dash pull Rarity into the conga line and shook his head. "Man, the mares here are crazy."

"Eeyup." Big Mac nodded in agreement. The two stallions were content to watch a begrudging Applejack lead a conga line before they called it a night.

Engineer4Ever: And there you have it, the ships have left the port, who you cheering for? Who will float, and who will sink! Only we know! Also, credit for Toilet Ninja goes to me...it really happened to me, sorta.

Bonesboy15: Yeah, you go ahead and be the 'toilet' ninja. I'll just sit over here and keep being awesome 'regular' ninja.

Engineer4Ever: They're everywhere!

Bonesboy15: I know, I know. Alright readers, it's that magical time again!

Y'all know what to do!

Review!