ST: For anyone not familiar with Dark Souls, Catalyst=Magic Staff

The Death of Dave Strider

Dave reached the graveyard just in time to watch a screaming Vantas, and maybe a screaming Maryam too, he couldn't make it out over Vantas' scratchy wails, get carried off by a giant crow. A giant fucking crow. Just out of nowhere, scoopin' them up like it ain't nothing and flying off into the gray clouded sky with the only two people he'd met in months that hadn't tried to kill or eat him. Fuck.

It wouldn't have been so disquieting had they been killed by say a hollow or a bandit- and of course they were as good as dead he's heard enough shitty kids stories to know what happens to people that get snatched up by giant birds- but to actually see them get snatched up by a giant fucking crow like that? What the hell kind of place was this where that was even a thing?

Had someone else been in his boots they would have probably mused philosophically on how randomly death can visit people, regardless of their character or actions. Dave merely stared into the sky, his mind blank with shock and a vague feeling of disturbed unease as he subconsciously repressed anything that might even come close to a depressive and useless epiphany on the nature of life and death. He instead compressed all of that into an uneasy and unsure "Well shit" and a growing list of ironic rants he could use to deflect both his own thoughts and the questioning of others from ever delving into this event, though at this point the latter ever occurring was looking pretty unlikely.

Shaking his head, he slowly turned and headed back into the demons room.

~)

He'd have to wait until tomorrow to travel back down the mountain. While the sun wasn't especially bright in the mountains, what with the constant cloud cover and all, it did provide some illumination. That light was fading fast however, and the clouds meant once the sun did fully set it would be pitch fucking black. The path up the mountain, while not the most well maintained road in the world, was still functional and if he went back down into the asylum and grabbed one of the torches he could probably make it tonight, but walking around as the only source of light on the mountain didn't sit well with him. Not with giant crows flying around.

At first Dave thought about tucking himself into one of the cells, or some small nook in one of the hallways, but then thought better of it. Clearly none of these cells were sturdy enough to hold the hollows and he didn't trust any of those short, tight passages to give him any time to react if a hollow stumbled across him while he slept.

Not for the first time since leaving Astora Dave found himself wishing John were there with him. Dave knew that, while far from the smartest man he'd ever known, John had a gift for being inventive and thinking on his feet. He'd probably have gathered up all the broken pieces of wood and metal scattered around the asylum and built a damn house by now. As it was however Dave had to resort to his own plan, plan B, in which B stands for badass plan that'll be perfectly fine and will totally work.

He gathered up some of the large urns from the demons room and circled them around the far corner away from the corpse and filled them with the heaviest junk armor and busted iron bars he could find. The way he figured, any hollows picking up his scent or whatever the fuck it is they do would have to make a shit ton of noise to move an urn that loaded down, if he could move it at all. The noise would wake Dave up; he'd kill the hollow, and then either go back to sleep, relocate, or keep vigil till sunrise. He'd figure out which when and if the time came.

It never occurred to Dave that the dead demon would attract hungry hollows. Never occurred to him that while his set up would fend off one or two, several dozen hollows would easily trap him in that corner and, without the leverage or room to move, he'd be chewed to death despite his newfound strength. Luckily for him as soon as he laid down and closed his eyes the floor beneath him caved in and he went tumbling down into the lower courtyard of the asylum.

While he'd never admit it, had that fall given him the time to scream he would've screamed as loud and long as he could. As it was he landed face first onto a small raised corner of the underground courtyard just a few feet below him. The air was knocked from his lungs and he was a little disoriented but he'd avoided the broken legs he would've surely received from the full fall.

His helmet was twisted at an uncomfortable angle, which had the added benefit of making him completely blind. He twisted his head around to right it, the thin openings on the faceplate giving him just enough space to see the pair of birdlike talons resting on the ground a few feet in front of him.

His eyes widened and his heartbeat pounded at his ears. He assumed it was another bird, less giant than the feathery asshole that snatched off Maryam and Vantas but still big enough to cave his skull in with its beak. There was no way he could rise and reach his sword either, not quickly enough, not with how close the damned thing was. And hell, that was assuming the broken blade hadn't gotten knocked off in the fall.

He stayed there on the ground, as still as he could, hoping the bird didn't see anything other than a pile of armor. It hadn't tried to peck at him yet though that was little comfort to Dave who had practically no armor covering his back. For those first few moments all he could was imagine what was surely a massive beak tearing through his back, crushing his lungs or heart or something else important. He wasn't sure it would kill him, but it would sure as hell keep him down long enough to be eaten. He doubted even an undead would survive that. Not that any undead would want to, now that he thought about it.

But as the seconds ticked by nothing happened. The initial shock of the fall and seeing the bird gradually wore off, and Dave started to wonder just what the fuck was going on here. Why wasn't this asshole doing anything? Better yet, why hadn't it flown the fuck off when the ceiling collapsed right in front of it? He was beginning to suspect that he'd done something very stupid and that there wasn't a bird in front of him at all, it was some weird ass statue or a figment of his scared awake mind. Then it spoke.

"Damn it get off the floor already you're making us look like an asshole."

It took Dave a second for his brain to register that, holy shit, that thing just talked. Confused and just a little freaked out, Dave tentatively raised his head to get a good look at this abomination. For what seemed like the hundredth time that day Dave was thankful for the faceplate covering his wide eyed, dumbstruck expression when he saw bird feet, bird feathers, bird wings, and disturbingly not entirely bird arms all connected to a mirror image of his own face. Or what would have been a mirror image, were it not for the creatures glowing hellfire red eyes.

"…hey."

"sup."

~)~)

"So what you're saying is you're me from the future?"

"No. I was you from the future right up until I came back here to the past and altered the timeline. I'm still you, and from the future, just a different you from a different future that may or may not still exist somewhere."

"Got it."

"Really?"

"Fuck no, but if there's anything that's too complicated for our awesome brains to waste their time thinking about it's that shit right there."

"My thoughts exactly. It's Rose's job to figure out all that technical bullshit. I'm the time and or dimensional travel guy, that's what I do. Uncovering the inner workings of reality wasn't in the job description. Granted neither was getting my insides turned into jelly but I seem to have managed that pretty well."

Dave's eyes drifted to puddle of blood collecting on the ground next to his doppelgangers side. After Dave had gotten over being a total bitch for what turned out to be no reason, if you counted you're bird-ified future self as being no reason to flip out, they'd both decided to sit down and talk. Quietly of course, there was another one of those fucking Demons sleeping against the wall at the opposite end of the courtyard. It was from the other Dave's struggle to get himself into a sitting position that Dave noticed the huge hole in his side, black blood barely visible against equally dark feathers.

"Yeah about that, you gonna be okay? That's a lot of blood. I've got some of that flame juice if you need it."

"Nah that shit doesn't work on me anymore. Part of being a badass bird demon. But yeah, no, this hole in my side hurts like a bitch but it's nothing you need to worry about. Like I said if Rose is right, and that snarky bitch is always right, then me being here means you'll turn into a different me. A me that doesn't get repeatedly fucked over by flighty broads."

"Cool. Who's Rose?"

" Some flighty broad. Actually she told me I wasn't even supposed to talk to you, something about space time continuity or some shit, but fuck that, I figured I'd give you the lowdown on anything you want to know about the immediate future."

" Sounds good, but maybe later. That fat bastard across the room is making me nervous. Any chance you could fly us outta here?"

"That's actually why I'm here. The plan was for me to ferry you to Firelink and save you from having to hike there yourself and being half a year late for everything like I was, though now that I'm here I'm thinking maybe I should kill that demon."

" Wait what?"

"Now I know that sounds dumb as hell I mean why would I give that bitch a fucking Demons soul but when you think about it shit makes perfect sense. She sucked up so many damn souls it probably won't give her any more of a power boost than she'd get with what I've got now, and TZ hasn't had any quality souls at all. It'd beef her all the hell up."

"How the fuck would you kill that thing? And what are you even talking about?"

"That's assuming she avenges me, which I'm sure she totally will. Hell, I'm pretty sure she was planning on killing Vriska anyway now that I think about it. Course that raises the question as to whether she even could. That's not to say I don't have mad faith in the girl, but at the same time it's not like she hasn't had her ass handed to her by that spiderwitch before.

"Oh gods is this what it's like when I start talking to myself? And you were getting on to me about being an embarrassment damn this is awful."

"Eh, fuck it. Whatever happens they'll figure out a way to deal with it. Those assholes need as many souls in circulation as they can get."

With that future Dave stood up and flexed out his wings, continuing to ignore his increasingly confused alternate past self.

~)~)~)

When the Stray Demon awoke it was to pain and darkness. Furiously it slapped its hands against where its eyes used to be, confused as to why it couldn't see and why its face hurt so badly, unaware that the pain that awoke it was from two clawed feet ripping out and crushing its eyes. The pain faded quickly though, as it did for all demons, and when it did the Stray Demon could sense something familiar in the room. Somewhere in the dark corners of the Demon's soul was the remnants man who remembered that power, the power that violated his very being, the power that turned him into what he sought to destroy.

Those faded corners of the demons soul had no sway with the Stray Demon itself though, who merely registered something to be destroyed. Rising to its feet the demon lifted its massive catalyst, carved from the bones of its fellow demons, and instinctively pooled the significant magic residing in its twisted soul into it, preparing to use what magic it knew to fill the room with fire.

Pain blossomed in its forehead before it could release the fire, and the surprised demon immediately dropped its catalyst and brought it hands to its head, intending to rip the bastard creature out and crush it, but before its hands could reach Dave a pillar of bright red fire erupted from its forehead, the force of the blaze knocking it on its back as it roared in pain and confusion. Despite the searing pain spreading through its head the demon tried in vain to bring its hands to its forehead and crush whatever was doing this.

The flames were too strong, the pain to great, even for a demon. And when the demon soul was drawn into the half undead abomination that killed it a long forgotten corner was, for a moment, able to reassert itself. That small portion, momentarily freed while the magic of the undead consumed the warped, demonic soul around it, was able to remember.

It remembered Izalith. It remembered charging hordes of demons, the former daughters of chaos, alongside its brothers. It remembered breaching the chamber of the Witch herself, expecting to die in battle against the rogue deity. Instead of the Witch it found a monster. The moment the knight laid eyes upon that twisted creature the flames of chaos entered his body and soul, warping him and his brothers into massive, corpulent demons. They entered that chamber knights in service to the great lord Gwyn, and left it as Demons of the false flame. They slaughtered men they'd sworn to fight and die beside for the next several years, up until the armies of the gods realized the truth of what was creating the Demons and finally managed to rout the horde, forcing most of them back into the ruins of Izalith. He and another were captured however and centuries later magically bound to two rooms of an undead asylum as part of a final, desperate plot by the waning gods.

And now the soul knew why the flame that was now killing it seemed so familiar; it was the same scorching fire that turned it into a demon in the first place. And then that unmolested corner of the demons soul was consumed as well, its fleeting consciousness destroyed as it was forcibly merged with the soul of its killer.

~)~)~)~)

Dave was impressed when his feathery look alike flew up to the sleeping demon and yanked out both its eyes with his freaky bird feet. He was shocked when, rather than circling the massive beast and inflicting small wounds he dive bombed straight into the Demon's face, thrusting both hands into the creature's very flesh. And he was knocked on his fucking ass when his doppelganger channeled a pillar of the reddest fire Dave had ever seen through his body and straight into the Demon's head.

The flame shot out the back of the demons head and appeared for a moment like a great blade, before the demons skull charred and broke into ash along with most of its upper body. Dave remained airborne, his wings beating furiously to keep him balanced as the force of the fire tried to launch him upwards. Slowly he began to pivot in the air, dragging his channeled flame downwards until the entirety of the demons body was reduced to nothing but ash.

Once the whole Demon was incinerated Dave began slowing his wings, the flames pushing him upwards slightly, so as not to launch himself into the ground. Finally, he ceased channeling the fire and fell to the ground, scattering a small cloud of ash as he landed. Shaking himself, dusting the remains of the Demon from his feathers except for where it clung to the blood covering his side, he experimentally flexed his wings.

He was feeling weaker already. Whatever fucked up inhuman organs that bitch's barbed up devil sword tore into apparently really were important because he did not feel right at all. His wings felt like they were moving through water and the tips of his hands and feet were going numb. He quickly beat his wings back and forth, working that weird languid feeling out of them before extending them out all the way. Looking up at his confused and awed past self his beat down his wings and left the ground, beginning the last flight he'd ever make.

~)~)~)~)~)

When Dave finally hit the ground he registered two things. One: He was on the ground. And two: He was back on the fucking ground! Finally!

He'd been grabbed up and carried off by his future self pretty much immediately after the Demon was dead. He'd yelled and struggled and cursed at first, but once they got above the clouds Dave figured he'd best shut up and just settle in for the flight. And gods damn was it a flight, he couldn't even begin to wonder about how long they were up in the air, moving at speeds just under what Dave imagined was the "wind tearing you damn skin off" limit. Long enough for that bastards fucking bird feet to wear a couple of holes in his shoulders at least. And what time he didn't spend wondering what the fuck was happening was spent being piss in your pants terrified at the wet hacking coughs and the tremors wracking his future self's body. A fall from that height was another thing he wasn't certain an undead could come back from.

They'd landed, and calling that shit a landing was being pretty generous, near some ruined buildings near the peak of the most massive city Dave had ever seen. He wished he'd gotten a better look at it before his face got well acquainted with the ground. All the same, the feathery asshole had had the decency to drop them right next to a bonfire, so those holes the bastard dug in his shoulders were finally healing. Shame the fire couldn't fix the holes those talons had torn in the armor too. He was low enough at that as it was.

He gave the bonfire a minute to work its magic before pushing himself up and looking around. They were at the base of a small grassy hill, the massive city behind him and far below. Ahead of him were what looked to be the remains of small walls and, further on up, some sort of large, ruined building. He wasn't sure what any of this used to be , though from the overgrown vines and grasses he could tell that it hadn't been anything but ruins for a long while.

He saw something black at the edge of his vision. He looked down to his right and saw that it was the crumpled body of that bird bastard. Maybe Dave could get some damn answers now that the kidnapping son of a bitch wasn't hacking up his lungs, courtesy of magic fire.

At least that was what Dave thought, right up until he shoved his future self over with his boot, trying to get him up and talking. Once he'd rolled right side up, the Dave standing up noticed with growing horror that the Dave lying on the ground was completely limp, still, with eyes wide open and blood coming out of everywhere.

"…oh fuck."