Authors note: So this is it! Before you read that final instalment i would just like to thank every single on of you that have taken the time to follow Nephrology. Your kind words and commitment to the story have been whats spurred it on to completion, so thank you! I'm hoping to write more in the future and already have a good idea in my head for my next story, so watch this space! Fell free to message me if you're interested or have any ideas or anything!

Please let me know what you think of this, the conclusion!

Also (just to save any confusion) the stuff in italics and separated by '+++' is Alice's daydreaming/the future...I'll let you guys decide for yourself ;)

Happy reading!

Chapter 31 – Superheroes

The wait was unbearable.

Pace.

Sip.

Sit.

Twitch.

Pace.

Sit.

Curse.

Clock.

Pace.

Sip.

Twitch.

Every time a doctor walked past the waiting room every head turned up expectantly, but they always walked past.

We had been weighting for an hour and a half but it felt like years. The surgery usually took 2-3 hours, so we still had a way to go.

Shiver.

Pace.

Sit.

Twitch.

Breath.

Pace.

Sip.

Clock.

2 hours had gone by and still not a word.

I could taste his skin on my lips from when I leaned in and kissed his forehead before they took him away. "You come back to me, you hear?" I had whispered into his ear. I didn't say 'I love you' because that felt like too much of a goodbye, like maybe I wouldn't see him again to tell him. But I would see him again, I would tell him I loved him every day for the rest of our lives until we grew old and grey with our children and grandchildren around us.

Sit.

Twitch.

Sip.

Think.

Worry.

Fear.

Hope?

Sit.

Pace.

"it's been three hours." Rosalie said, breaking the silence. "They said two to three hours. Where is he?"

"Procedures always take longer when…when that patient is very sick." Dad supplied. "They just need to be more carful."

"Why hasn't anyone come to talk to us?" She asked. Her voice was tight and restrained, no longer tear filled and hopeless. There was a determination in her voice now. A little bit of the old fierce Rosalie we were all accustomed to.

"That is a good sign," Dad said. "It means they're all still working hard and everything is going well."

What a line. I thought to myself. It's a line all doctors learn to placate relatives when we have no idea what's going on. He could be right. But it could also mean he's so ill that they can't spare someone to come tell us anything. Or it could mean nothing at all. Hospitals are busy places and surgeons are busy people, they didn't always think to take the time to talk to the family.

The clock had become my enemy. Every second felt like and hour. Sometimes I started at the clock urging time to go faster. Other times I kept my eyes far away from it hopping for one of those moments when you looked up again and said 'Oh where has the time gone?'. That didn't happen either.

Sit.

Pace.

Twitch.

Breath.

In.

Out.

I remember that night he had pulmonary oedema. I was so scared, sitting with him, urging him to breath along with me. "Just breath Jasper, just breath." I thought that night that that was it, that was the night that everything would go down hill and I would loose him. But then he got better. He'd been so much better; I hadn't seen this coming.

But you knew this was coming Alice, you knew since you met him.

"Mummy, daddy, wake up! Wake up!" A small voice called through the morning light. A short warning before a blond haired little girl came crashing into our bed. "Wake up!" She chanted as she pushed and pulled at my limbs trying to rouse me.

"Come here you little monster." My husband snarled as he grabbed his daughter and pulled her into bed. She screamed and writhed against her daddy's strong arms as he held her in place. "Now I think I'm going to sleep a little longer." He fake yawned and rolled over, my little girl still held firmly in his arms.

"No daddy no, we're going to see the babies!" She cried out. "Mummy help me!"

"Oh come on daddy," I said, a smile evident in my voice. "I think we can let our prisoner go, as long as she promises to get dressed. We're not going to see your new cousins in your PJ's."

"I promise, I promise." She squealed.

"Oh all right then," my husband groaned. "Can I go in my PJ's?" He asked.

Our daughter laughed as she skipped out the bedrooms.

"Can you imagine having that much energy?" Jasper asked wistfully as he turned over to look at me. The morning sunlight was steaming through the shutters, lighting his golden hair like a halo. I couldn't have resisted the urge to reach up and run my finders through it even if I'd wanted it. In the heat of summer our bed sheets had become a tangled mess at the bottom on the bed, meaning my Jasper was lying in nothing but his boxers.

After eight years of waking up next to him, it still took my breath away to see him like this. My fingers traced down his soft skin, finally coming to rest upon a small scar, about four inches long, just above his hip. I'll never forget all those years ago, running around in a bridesmaid dress thinking he wouldn't have this scar, thinking he wouldn't stay alive long enough to get it.

"You're far away Alice," He whispered to me. I looked up to find his baby blue eyes staring right into mine.

"Just thinking about the past," I whispered.

This time he swept his hand down my bare skin, leaving his hand to rest on the distinctive bump of my tummy. "I'm thinking about the future." He smiled.

It's been three and a half hours.

Sit.

Pace.

Clock.

Click.

Look.

Sip.

Twitch.

"When we were young," Rosalie said, breaking the silence. "Our mom used to take us to this park about two hours from our house. Dad would never take us because we were surrounded by parks, why should we drive two hours to one that was the same as all the rest? But it wasn't the same, because it was out favourite park."

I looked over to her, she sitting ridged in a hard plastic chair with Emmett's arm tight around her waist. Her eyes were far away. "There was this big rock in the park and we loved to climb up on it. Mom used to hate it when we did, would do everything she could to keep us away from it but we always found it and we climbed right up to the top. One time we went there it had just been Jaspers birthday, he must have been 5 or 6 maybe I'm not sure, and he'd got this batman costume that he just wouldn't take off." She smiled at that. "That thing must have stank! So anyway he climbs up on this rock but instead of climbing down he decided to jump off it, and this is a pretty big rock! Mom was standing at the bottom shouting at him to climb down. 'Get down Jazzy Get down, you're going to kill yourself!' she was hollering up at him. But he just stood there with his hands on his hips and said…"

Her voice hitched suddenly and she broke off, putting her hand to her mouth as she took a breath. Emmett squeezed her tightly and murmured something in her ear.

"He said…" She took her hand from her mouth, her voice gaining strength. "'don't worry mom, superheroes don't die.'" Her voice cracked on the last word and I could hear tears in her voice. "And then he jumped….and broke his arm."

A kind of restrained laughter filled the room. The whole family happy to have something else to think about for a while.

"Your poor mother," Mom said.

"Yeah, she was livid." Rosalie half laughed, half cried. I could see her thinking over and over in her head the exact same thing I was thinking.

Superheroes don't die. I repeated to myself. I said it over and over in my head. Because what was Jasper to me, if he wasn't a superhero? Superheroes don't die.

"I hope someone is dressed and ready to go!" I called out after I finally managed to pull myself out of my husbands arms and get some clothes on. Most of my clothes didn't fit me anymore, jeans were definitely out and all my blouses, I ended up in a loose floral dress. At least it was summer time. After six years I'd forgotten what it was like to be carrying a child inside me again, it was the most wonderful and terrible thing you could ever do.

"I am, I am, just like I promised." An excited five year olds voice filled the hall way as she clambered down the stairs. Before she could reach other bottom Jasper grabbed her over the banister her swung her around in his arms. Our daughters excited giggles made me forget all about clothes not fitting.

"That's my clever girl," He said, setting her down on her own two feet. "Now help me get the car packed up with presents for uncle Emmett and Auntie Rosalie."

"I thought the presents were for the babies?" She asked.

"Well some of them are but now they have four little stinkers like you running around I think they deserve a present of their own." He ruffled her hair affectionately and started passing her the lightest packages to take to the car.

"I still can't believe after having two kids already they ended up having twins!" I shook my head, unable to grasp the concept. "I'm worried enough about have a baby and a five year old. Can't imagine having a seven year old, a three year old and two babies! And all boys!"

Jasper chuckled. "They'll be fine, they're pros. Do you know if Ed and Bells are coming down today?"

"Yeah, so are mum and dad. First twins in the family, very exciting I just feel bad for…"

I was cut off by an excited five-year-old again. "Mom, dad, I've put all the presents in come on we have to go!"

"Okay okay, we're coming." I sighed.

My coffee was stone cold now and only half drank, I swirled the dark liquid around the bottom of the paper cup and watched it move. Despite the lack of caffeine in my system I felt more alert than I ever had in my life. Except maybe my third year finals, I was really caffeinated for those. Every time someone walked past the glass door my heart started beating twice as fast. It was like when you were looking up your exam results but the page hadn't loaded yet and you just suddenly realised that you might have failed and that in the few seconds that page would load and confirm your horrible suspicion. It actually felt exactly like that, except there was also this void of nothingness inside me, the gap I didn't know was there until Jasper filled it.

Edward squeezed my shoulder on his way out, presumably to the bathroom, normally that would have felt like a comforting gesture, but the only person I wanted, needed, to comfort me was lying on an operating table.

Sit

Pace

Sulk

Time

Bite

After four hours with no news, my mind was conjuring up the worst.

My heart suddenly leapt in my chest, it seemed it had noticed the doctor in the white coat standing at the door of the waiting room before my brain had.

"What's happening?" Rosalie's voice rang out. "How's Jasper?"

The doctor took a deep breath and I could feel every member of my family tense as he chose his words. I wanted to punch him and hit and get him to hurry up, but I also didn't want to know. What if it was bad news? What if…?

"He made it through the surgery." He said slowly.

One small thread inside me started to relax. But he wasn't finished talking.

"But It can take a few days for the transplant to work properly, if it's going to work, so we're not out of the woods yet. He's been transferred back to ICU and is still receiving full renal support."

This was still sounding okay to me. I'm a nephrologist in training, I know the procedure after a transplant. But why did the doctor look so nervous?

"There were also some…complications."

Emmett instantly put his arm around Rosalie, as if she might faint, her she stood so deafly still and strong she could have been made of stone. I didn't quite feel like that, my knees started to shake as words and phrases ran through my mind.

All those complications of renal transplant that I had studied and memorised were scrolling across my vision.

"We think we suffered a PE, a blood clot that travelled to his lungs." The surgeon explained. "He want into respiratory distress, but after a few minutes he stabilised and we proceeded. We won't know if there was any neurological damage until he wakes up."

"Neurological damage?" Rosalie asked, her voice tight and strained. "What does that mean?"

"Well we won't know until he.."

"Until he wakes up, yes, I understood that but what kind of damage?" She asked more forcefully.

"It could be nothing, and I strongly suspect it will be, but it could be memory loss, a mental deficit, difficulty with speech, muscle weakness. We really can't tell."

Rosalie nodded once and stayed silent. I suspect she knew if she spoke again she would start crying. I realised that at some point in the conversation I had started crying.

"Can we see him, please?" I begged. My tear filled voice meriting a glance of pitting from the doctor. He nodded, leading Rosalie and I back through to the all-to-familiar ICU.

By the time we actually managed to leave the house after several false starts (someone forgetting to pack her favourite bear, someone else having to check they'd switched off the air con, and even someone deciding to change out of her terrible floral dress into someone a bit plainer) the rest of the family had already arrived at Rosalie and Emmett's.

"Sorry we're late," I called into the house. I had somehow found myself laden with all the gifts after my over-excited daughter ran out of the car onto the road and Jasper had to run after her. I dumped them all in the hall and made my way into the front room.

Renesmee was tucked in the corner playing with her three-year-old cousin as his baby brothers lapped up the rest of the attention. My mom and dad seemed to have claimed ownership of their twin grandsons and were making googly eyes as they squirmed in their laps.

"Have you finally named them Rose?" I asked as I peered over mom's shoulder to get a look.

Rosalie was settled into an arm chair, looking pale and excused. Which you couldn't really blame her for, since she'd just given birth to twins. "Well I named the first two so it was Emmett's turn."

"That's Fred, Ali," Emmett called from across the room, where he already appeared to have launched into deep conversation with Jasper. "And the one that dad's got is George."

My mouth dropped open as I looked up at my big brother. He had the biggest grim on his face I think I've ever seen.

"Seriously?" Jasper laughed. "I can't believe my sister let you do that!"

"Let him do what?" Rosalie piped up, clearly not amused to be left out on the joke. "I mean the names are a bit…English…but they're sweet." She looked around again at out bemused faces. "What?" she demanded.

"Fred and George?" I said. "Like Fred and George Weasley?" Rosalie looked on clueless. "Harry Potter?"

"Who's Harry Potter?"

"She never was one for fiction." Jasper whispered to Emmett as I started to explain to her the origins of her new born son's names.

"You named our sons after two trouble making fictional characters from a children's book?" She whined.

The room burst into joyous laughter. It was nice to have the family all together.

If I thought it would be easier seeing him now, after the surgery was finished, I was wrong. He had even more tubes and wires snaking in and out of his body than before and his face seemed to have slipped to an odd shade of grey. It took all the infinitesimal strength I had left not to keep standing. At least the tube in his throat was gone, his chest moving up and down of its own accord.

Rosalie rushed over to his side and started brushing her fingers through his blond hair. "You're going to be okay Jazz, just keep fighting." She murmured to him. "Keep fighting." She repeated over and over.

He'd done so much fighting already. How much can one body take?

There's no natural light in the ICU, so as I took up residence in a chair beside his bed, I had no idea what time of day it was. I lost all concept of the passage of time. Family members came in and out one by one. I was dully aware of people speaking, kissing the top of my head, squeezing my shoulder. It was hard to tell at this point if my mental fuzziness was due to worry over Jasper or a profound lack of sleep. Probably both.

Though as tired as I knew I must have been, I didn't sleep a wink.

When the sun started to sink in the sky, casting an orange glow through the front windows, we decided to draw the night to a close. Rosalie was looking exhausted and the kids were being irritable though they denied it vehemently.

My little girl fell asleep in the car home and I watched my beautiful husband lift her, with such care and tenderness, out of the car seat and up to her own bed.

I decided to leave unpacking the car for another day and opted instead to take a good long cool shower. I'd forgotten what it was like when you were pregnant and had twice as much blood flowing through your body that sometimes the heat was unbearable. My plain blue loose dress was clinging to me in a really uncomfortable way and I just wanted to rip it off and feel some cool water wash away the grime.

After I felt clean again I checked in on my little girl, still blissfully unconscious tucked up in bed cuddling her favourite 'the incredible hulk' soft toy. She wasn't ever one from princess', preferring to play superheroes with her cousins. I leaned against her door frame and watched on as her chest moved up and down, her lips curling and uncurling as a dream played through in her head. She was perfect.

"There you are?" Jaspers voice rang softly in my ears, a sound that was always welcome. He came up behind me, wrapping his strong arms around me and pulled me close. "She's a good kid." He whispered.

I nodded, my head moving against his chest. We stood watching out daughter sleep for a long time, we didn't move away until I, myself, was starting to slip into dreamland. My eyes started to droop and as I leaned ever more heavily against him, he swept me up into his arms.

"Time to take my other girls to bed." He whispered. My hand moved almost unconsciously to my swollen belly and excitement swelled in my chest, I couldn't wait to meet our second daughter.

"I love you." I whispered. And with that my eyes closed and I fell asleep, so content, knowing I was the only place in the world I would ever want to be.

"You have to wake up." I whispered. It was the first think I'd said to him since he'd come out of surgery. I must have been sitting in this uncomfortable chair for hours and hours but this was the first time we'd been alone.

"I can see our future Jasper, we're married, in a beautiful house you built for us. We have all the family in the garden celebrating, toasting us and throwing bits of paper in air. And then we have a daughter, she's beautiful, small like me but she has your eyes and your blond hair, it falls in waves down her back and we don't have the heart to cut it. You're the most amazing dad, I can see that. I can see it so clearly Jas."

For once, there were no tears flowing down my cheeks. I filled my voice with all the confidence I could muster.

"I can see family parties with your sister and my brothers, kids running around everywhere because you know Emmett and Rose are gonna have a big family. I can see birthdays and Easter and Christmas and thanksgiving, all of us crowded around a big table, voices and laughter filling the air. I can see such a great life for us Jasper. But you have to wake up."

I could feel tears threatening in the voice, but I swallowed them down and carried on.

"You have to wake up because without you, there's not as much light and laughter in the world. Without you, I don't have that life. So you have to wake up Jasper please."

I squeezed his hand and waited for him to squeeze mine back.

"Please wake up."

I squeezed again.

"Please." My voice was barely audible.

And just when I thought I couldn't hold back the tears anymore, just when I was about to stand up and walk away, unable to take this torture of his unresponsive body, I felt something move.

"Alice?" His voice reached my ears and I had never heard anything so wonderful in my life.

I looked up at his face and saw two blue eyes staring up at me.

And I knew it. I don't know how I knew it. I just knew.

He was going to be okay.