CHAPTER 12 – WHAT ARE WE?

ANA POV

Okay so this is happening. But, I can't actually fault anything with what he's or we are doing. It feels, oh, so right. The way his tongue is coaxing mine out of its hiding spot. I just told him what... What... HE did to me but this kiss. The feel of his body against mine, is simply perfection. Timorously, I inched my tongue towards his. I gave a small stroke against his own, unsure of what to do but his guttural moan of reply let me know that he liked it. I don't know about him, although I'm sure he is probably in the same boat but, this is my actual, first, proper, real kiss and it is perfect. There is no way I can fault him.

I don't know how long our lips were locked or how we got there but he had me on his lap while straddling him with one arm pulling me towards him and the other buried in my hair. On the end of a moan which was leaving my mouth came an unfortunate sound which completely dampened his mood. Of course my stomach rumbled. Now when all I could think about was his tongue, his warm mouth and my desire for bit to return to my own. Though, obviously Mr you-must-take-care-of-your-self isn't feeling the same.

"Come on let's go get some pizza!" I cried and jumped up before he had the chance to say anything. We got up and I said, "Although, first I need to go and freshen up a little before we have to go."

I got up and went to the bathroom. I splashed water all over my face repeatedly. When I looked in the mirror at my tearstained face and red rimmed eyes it all came flowing back. HE is here and he is coming for me. I don't know what will happen but, I know that I can't let it break me apart again. And well it's not going to happen again, now I have Dad with me and I have Christian. Oh damn. I forgot he was and probably still waiting, how long was I in here for. I splashed water on my face and dried myself before leaving the bathroom. Outside I caught Christian staring out the window.

"Hey, let's go," I said softly, no longer having the energy to say much. He turned his head towards me and slowly nodded his head.

"Sure Ana, let us go." He said in an exaggerated manner. I couldn't help the soft giggle which escaped my throat, unwittingly. He makes me laugh without even trying very hard. I'll always love him for that.

He reached out for my hand and I placed mine in his where he pulled towards the door. When we reached downstairs, there was no one about, the whole place was deserted. "I guess they wanted to give you some space." Christian squeezed my hand.

We got pizza, and ran back upstairs although, when we were nearing the top I heard three doors all slam at once so I knew the others were curious. I... I just don't know how to actually tell them anything about what happened. I don't think I could handle all the Grey's looking at me with pity, or differently at all.

We returned to Christian's bedroom where he sat me on the bed and closed the door. It felt weird to be sitting on the bed after all that had happened but it wasn't exactly awkward. It felt right with him but the silence was killing me so I had to be the one who broke it.

"So... that happened?" Okay, was totally the stupidest sentence that has probably ever left my mouth but I couldn't help it. He looked at me and gazed right back into his eyes before we both burst out in laughter. After my giggle died down he tried to start.

"Well I guess we did kiss but its okay if you don't want things to change between us. I'm okay with it if you want to be... I mean I guess... we could remain friends" He finally managed to articulate a sentence but damn, if it wasn't what I wanted to hear. Although, the way in which he shrugged and the grim set of his lips let me know that he didn't really want what he said. God! I had literally, not even one hour ago told him all about, HIM... and now this was happening. Ugh! Being a teenager sucks.

I took a deep breath and rather awkwardly mentioned what I wanted, "And what if I don't want to stay just friends? I mean you know everything about me and I know everything I need to know about you. I don't think I'd actually be able to be this comfortable around anyone else. There is something between us, what, I don't exactly know. So what do you say?" I glanced up at him and saw him gazing at me, earnestly.

"I know, but you haven't been back for five months and there is so much going on right now, I feel as though if we try... if we give us a go now, we wouldn't last very long."

Doesn't he understand? That is the whole reasoning behind what I'm saying, ever since I returned in September, there has always been something happening and now, with all this, this ish weeding its way back into my life, I want to take what I want, grab on and hold onto to it for as long as I possibly can. Sighing, I reasoned my point, "Christian, HIM coming back into my life makes me want to grasp the good things in my life and hold on for my life. I want to do the one thing I've wanted to do since I've returned to Seattle. Life will continue but, I don't know how it will turn out for me," I paused and grasped onto his face, "but, what I do know is what I want and WHO I want."

My face was morose as I stared into his face, dreading the words which may fall from his beautiful lips. "Ana, off course I'd love to be with you but are you sure? I don't want to make things hard for you right now. I, of course I want you to be my forever but what if we don't last now, I'd die without you in my life. I don't think I could lose you a second time." The pained expression, painted on his face shattered my heart.

"Christian, don't think so negatively, I don't think I could live without you either. You keep me balanced." I shoot him a small smile.

He looked at me, a twinkle in his eyes, as he caressed my cheek. "Well then Ana, I humbly accept your request to become your doting boyfriend." He grinned and I barely contained my squeal before I launched myself at his face pressing my lips against his.

He pulled me into his lap and allowed me to dominate the kiss at the beginning before he took over. This is what I love about him and this, it makes me forget everything going on around us, allows me to forget about all the shadows in the world and relish in the light he brings me. He nipped at my lips and gently teased my lips open and once again began massaging my tongue with his own. I ran my hand up his chest before knotting my fingers in his hair trying to pull him closer. His shudder of delight matched mine as his hand wrapped around my head, the other caressing my back.

Too soon he pulled away, leaving me to gasp in air. Panting profusely, he pressed his forehead against mine, smiling that special, shy smile he reserved for me. He suggested we finish our slices before they needed to be re-heated once more, thus, while we were quiet - only sharing shy smiles - we finished our food and I gulped down water. He sat down on his bed, me paralleling his posture beside him. He held my hand and kissed my knuckles before suggesting, as it was already really late, that I spend the night here.

I pulled off my shoes as he went into the bathroom to change, telling me that I could use anything I wanted for the night. I got naked, except for my panties and pulled one of his plain black T-shirts. While I finished up he knocked on the door before calling out, "Ana, are you done yet?"

I called out my simple reply of yes before I walked past him into the bathroom to freshen up before bed. I walked back in the room as Christian laid down on the left hand side and pulled the covers down making room for me beside him. I ran up and launched myself at the bed, on top of him breaking down into fits of giggles. After finally calming down, he pulled me into his arms and replaced the covers around me.

He kissed my cheek before whispering in my ear, "I think with you in my bed instead on FaceTime will guarantee me the best nights sleep I have had in a long time." His breath paired with his sweet but sincere words caused shivers to run down my spine. I turned my head back and lightly pressed my lips against his as I softly spoke, "Sweet dreams, Christian." I laid my head on the pillow before we both drifted off to sleep.

The week later

Christian POV

Ana's first cheer performance is tomorrow and she is stressing once more. No matter how many times we tell her that she will be amazing, it is like it goes straight out of her head. She has been practising none stop and now, before her performance, in place of practicing any more she has resolved in getting pep talks from Ray, Me, Kate and Mom (Elliot and Dad couldn't make it).

The game starts so Mia and Ana rush off to get ready and prepare before their performance.

Halftime comes and I'm pretty sure I'm gaping. I knew Ana was good but God! She was so damn flexible. She has some serious rhythm as she dances and flips all around the field. At last she is thrown into the air one last time, thank God because I don't think my heart could handle one more of them, and the crowd goes wild. The team is so damn talented, I didn't spend much time looking at her but Mia was so GOOD to and I guess Kate was too but I don't think I noticed much of anyone else. I'm waiting by the gate for Ana as she rushes off the field right into my arms. I take her lips in a passionate kiss but stop as I hear catcalls from some of my friends on the Rowing team and Ana's from everywhere. Who knew the girl was so amiable - she made friends everywhere and anywhere.

We met up with our family and after a round of congratulations and hugging we decided to ditch the rest of the game and go out to a restaurant nearby. I suggested that Ana and Mia change out of their uniforms, not caring much about Kate but not wanting guys to be gawping at what was mine and Ana's belly-cut top and short cheer skirt left little to the imagination. Also, Mia was my sister so no guy actually had the audacity to look at her so that mattered little.

All my pleading and reasoning fell short from my lips as Ana, probably predicting what was to come, locked her lips with mine in a passionate kiss that left me breathless. she then broke away, smiled her dazzling smile my way before swinging hr hips off in the direction of my car. My family and Ray were all chuckling as I followed Ana to my car. My phone pinged with a message from Ray, telling me that we would be dining at Saul's, although, he signed off with a good luck and winking emoji.

I shook my head laughing as me and Ana got buckled in before I drove off to our destination.

So sorry it took so long but, in French control assessment I was told that I got a B and therefore had to resit and then found out that we had another mock week. Thanks for all the follows, favourites and reviews, I'm blown away by the positive response this story garnered. Is there anyone who would be willing to proof read my chapters for me as I'm awful at it, I can never be bothered, please PM me if so.

I'll try to get the next update up sooner but for now please review and thank you,

Amy xxx