A/N - I originally intended to do the Rachel reveal scene in this chapter, but got a little carried away and wanted to make sure I did it properly. Instead, there are a lot of references to s1ep10- 'the shelf life' here which is a brilliant episode if anyone is rewatching. As always any comments are very welcome. I'll do my best to continue but I'm starting back at college tomorrow so want you to be aware that it may be less frequent but I am enjoying writing and hope you're all enjoying reading.
Disclaimer- I want to again emphasise that I don't own most of this material and there are some great people working on this show that deserve all the credit.
PS. Just as a guide to stop you getting lost in this chapter, everything written in italics is a scene from S1ep10
They sat in Mike's living room and Harvey managed to pull some strings in order to get Stan's number. As he was on the phone, Mike thought back to that case not long after he had become Harvey's associate. It seemed like an eternity ago.
"I've been here for 9 years. My work has been nothing but great. I mean why would this even matter now?-" Stan was breaking down in front of Harvey and Mike wished more than ever that Harvey had let him sit this one out. It was way too close to home for him.
"You've been committing fraud your entire career. The liability it presents-" Harvey was in full lawyer mode but Mike caught his eye for a split second and saw a hint of something, maybe regret? Or sympathy.
"No, I don't accept this." He could sense Stan's complete hopelessness and couldn't help but think about the possibility of this happening to him in the near future. This job was his entire life now, he had nothing else. And it could all be taken away from him in a split second.
Harvey broke Mike out of his daydream to inform him that he had been successful and Ray would be able to drop him off at the meeting place. He felt somewhat lighter now. He could finally talk to someone who would understand how lost he now felt.
As they got into the car, Harvey looked over at his forlorn associate. Mike had been quiet ever since their encounter earlier when he had revealed why he had been fired. In fact, he had barely looked at the older man. "Mike." He managed to get his attention. "Are you sure you're ok?" Harvey knew it was a stupid question but Mike seemed to understand what he was asking.
"Yeah, I guess I'm just feeling a little lost. But we all have our health so.." He started laughing but soon stopped and Harvey's heart almost snapped as he heard Mike's voice break, "I don't know what to do now Harvey."
Harvey considered pulling him into a hug but knew Mike would be feeling embarrassed anyway so resorted to giving the kid a pat on the back. "It'll be fine Mike, we'll sort something out. I'll do everything I can for you. I don't do losing." Mike straightened up a bit at his statement and seemed to perk up but didn't look entirely convinced. Harvey just wished there was something he could do, he'd always carried the weight of other people's problems on his own shoulders, done his best to share the burden. But he was aware that Mike would have to fight most of this himself.
-SUITS-
As he walked through central park, Mike found himself people watching. It was such a wonderful spring day and the path was relatively busy. He observed a young girl, walking her dog and noted that she seemed so happy and carefree. He found himself resenting her but knew how ridiculous that was. What had she ever done to him? He just wanted to go back to a more simpler time.
In the distance, he saw the man he was looking for, sat on a bench doing the same thing as him. Stan looked happy and at peace compared to the last time Mike had seen him.
"Well... What am I supposed to do now?" Stan had said as they exited the conference room. He'd completely lost the smug grin he'd had when they'd been in the conference room getting Tori to come clean. It had been replaced by the helpless facial expression that he'd worn when Mike and Harvey had informed him that he was being let go. Mike had never seen an older man look more like a tiny child.
"Well we just got you more than your severance package. I suggest you use it to tie yourself over until you figure something out." Mike wasn't sure if he was impressed or disgusted by Harvey's lack of emotive response. That was literally the worst advice ever and Mike knew it was just the older man's way out of the conversation. The case was over and they'd won in more ways than one. But they would still just have to dump Stan and leave him to his own devices. It wasn't fair.
Harvey stuck his hand out and Stan took it with fragility. Harvey briefly looked at Mike before heading back towards his office. Mike knew he was being told to meet him when he was done. He took a deep breath to calm his nerves and looked towards Stan. He was covering his mouth now and looked like he was about to be sick.
"Stan, your best asset is your mind. They can't take that from you."
"One little mistake…" It was like Stan wasn't even listening to him. He was laughing but Mike knew he found nothing funny about the situation.
"You could go back to school, become legitimate?" Mike was doing his best to help the man but could only just grasp at the sadness he must be feeling. Mike wished there was something he could do.
"Start over." Stan took a moment, contemplating the thought and Mike left it in silence. There was nothing else he could say anyway. He was surprised to see Stan start to turn away from him and let the older man leave. But it shook something up inside him when he heard the older man mutter, "I never should have done it."
Was he doing the right thing here? Should he just leave now and become legitimate instead of wasting years of his life?
In present day, Mike had approached Stan at the bench. He looked up at Mike with a degree of respect and admiration on his face and it filled Mike with a warmth. "Well, well. If it isn't employee number 761053."
Mike laughed at his greeting. It seemed appropriate. "You still remember that?"
"I lied on my resumè. I never lied about having a head for numbers." He gestured for Mike to sit at the bench. The younger man did.
"I never said how sorry I was for what happened to you."
"You don't need to be sorry Mike." Mike felt some of the guilt inside him ease. He hadn't really done anything for the man. Stan turned to face him. "In fact, I should be thanking you."
"What?" Mike laughed. This wasn't what he had expected.
"Do you know what I do now? Statistical analysis for fantasy baseball." Stan laughed and Mike joined him. It was the first time his mouth had smiled voluntarily in a long time and he felt so much more at ease now. He knew this had been the right decision.
"That's awesome!" Mike said, for lack of a better word. He honestly was happy to see that Stan had his life together now and had picked himself back up. Finally, Mike was starting to feel some hope for the future.
"In my old, better job, I sat in my office, crunching numbers. Made a lot more money but barely knew the name of one person on my floor. Now my best friends are the people I work with." Stan's face lit up with the enthusiasm of someone who was content. Mike wished the same for himself in the future.
Stan cleared his throat though. "So why'd you call me?"
And the conversation turned more serious. Mike struggled for the correct way to phrase this. "When I last saw you, you had no idea what you were going to do with the rest of your life." He looked at Stan with admiration himself now. He realised now that all he wanted was happiness. No more lies. He wanted something that he'd legitimately worked towards himself. "I mean, you had to start all over-"
"And you want to know how." Mike neither confirmed nor denied this, but Stan wasn't stupid and could see it in his eager expression.
"You start by starting."
Mike was kinda shocked by this statement. "What does that mean?"
"It means for 6 months I threw myself a giant pity party. Wondered how the hell I was going to get out of the mess I was in." This startled Mike. He realised that it was exactly what he had done since Jonathon had uttered the words 'you're fired' to him. He hadn't really done anything to help himself. He hadn't 'started' as Stan put it.
"And then one day I said enough is enough. And instead of asking questions, I started looking for answers." Mike couldn't help thinking that this guy would make a half decent philosopher if he wouldn't be wasting his talent with numbers.
"And you found fantasy baseball?" He regretted the sense of sarcasm in his question but Stan overlooked him.
"No. I found out that how much money a person makes is not the most important thing in the world; Who you spend it with everyday is." Mike bit his lip. Of course, he'd been doing this all wrong so far. Yeah, he'd lost his job. Like he said to Harvey, that happens to people every single day. What mattered was that despite his family being gone, he still had an amazing support network. People who would do anything for him.
He thought of Harvey's words in the car. 'I'll do everything I can for you.' He'd come as soon as he found out that Mike had been fired. And Mike knew who had set that up. Donna. He'd always had a degree of respect for the redhead. He admired her way of always knowing what to do to help a person out.
And of course, Rachel. They'd been through so much together, they could easily get through this. What was another bump in the road? He had her no matter what. And that was all that really mattered.
He felt a sense of urgency to go do something, to go see them. "Thanks Stan. I really appreciate it." He patted the older man on the shoulder. He really did have a lot to thank him for.
But Stan didn't seem to appreciate his hasty exit. "Woah, why is it you need to start all over?"
Mike knew he didn't have time to get into this now. It was a bad idea to tell Stan about his fraudulent business now. Just as he was deciding to get his life together. But he owed the older man an explanation.
"It's a long story. Another time perhaps?" Stan smiled at him and seemed content with that.
As Mike walked back through the park away from Stan, he genuinely felt much happier. Stan had made him realise that he was overreacting about all this. He'd lost his job and had nothing to work towards but a fresh start would do him good. He had Rachel and everyone else who was important in his life to support him through it now. He could finally start working towards a legitimate career. In what, who knew?
It was such a beautiful day and he felt his mind drift again.
Mike let Stan leave. There was nothing else he could do for the poor man. He went to his cubicle and engrossed himself in work, writing up briefs for the case and tying up some loose ends for Harvey. But he couldn't concentrate properly. What was he doing with his life? This was his ultimate dream but it was available to him at a huge price.
Mike knew that if he was caught, this would all be over and he'd have nothing to fall back on. He'd have no income to keep up his Grammy's increasing medical bills.
It was late by the time he walked back over to Harvey's office. Donna wasn't around, Harvey must have let her go, so Mike just pushed through the door.
"Well, you'll be happy to know that Stan has no idea what to do with the rest of his life."
"That doesn't make me happy."
"What if I tell you I have no idea what I'm doing with mine." Mike was stood looking out over the beautiful view of his city. He had been born and raised here and had hardly ventured outside of it since birth. He revelled in the energy that it presented. Even at this late hour of night, it was still alive. He could hear sirens and the faint buzz of traffic and observed the many lights of the skyscrapers beginning to dwindle. It filled him with hope. This was the land of opportunity. He could make it somewhere else, surely.
"What the hell are we going to do when I get caught, Harvey?" It was something that had been bugging him throughout this case. Mike was aware that what they were doing was serious. Practicing law without a licence was a severe criminal offence. He could be in much more trouble than Stan had been.
"You're not gonna get caught-"
"That's your answer?" He couldn't believe that Harvey was being so laid back about this. He needed truthful answers from the older man.
"What else is there?" Harvey turned towards Mike, his jaw tight. He knew this conversation was coming. Harvey was being very blunt. He had hired Mike on the premise that he was way better than those Harvard douches and had been aware of the risk they were taking but thought Mike had been like him and was prepared to do anything to live this life.
Mike had been facing the window and Harvey observed his tense state. He suddenly turned, and marched towards Harvey "Why?"
Harvey was genuinely shocked. He wasn't sure what the boy was asking and wished they could get this out of the way so that Mike could make his decision and move on. "What?"
"Hire me. Why would you do that to me?" Mike tried to relax but couldn't. He needed to make a decision now. Was it worth continue this? He'd never been a quitter but was this job really worth it.
"You mean for you." Harvey was slightly hurt by Mike's statement. He realised the position was stressful but he'd thought Mike was grateful for the opportunity. It was a decision they had both made together in that room with the interview that was never supposed to happen.
"No, I don't. You made it perfectly clear that you only do things for yourself, so why?" Mike's tone was more gruff than usual. He was being deadly serious and Harvey could see the dilemma in his eyes. They were both looking directly at each other and the tension was formidable. As much as Harvey hated to admit it, he liked working with the kid. He knew it was tough at first, especially if you hadn't even been to law school but Mike had managed better than most. He'd made some mistakes and his punctuality was beyond poor but he had also proven to be a useful asset.
Of course, they'd also started to develop a degree of friendship with movie quotes and lighthearted banter. Harvey was actually beginning to trust Mike and felt a protective instinct over what he referred to as the younger version of himself. He didn't want to have to replace Mike. He'd realised lately that working alone wasn't as good as he'd thought and couldn't now imagine working with anyone other than Mike after almost 9 months. But still, he realised this was a decision Mike would have to make for himself. He'd already made his own choice, it was all down to the kid now.
Harvey chuckled at the statement. "You mean the reason why I became a lawyer, or your friend dealt drugs, or you used to cheat?"
"I cheated because I needed to-"
"You couldn't make money any other way? Bullshit." Mike was taken aback but Harvey's harsher tone. He was only asking for an explanation.
And Harvey was about to give it to him. He just wished the younger lawyer was like him, prepared for a more exciting life and finding the prospect of a challenge thrilling. Otherwise he wasn't up for this job anyway."Life is this." Harvey indicated with his hand level with the table. He then raised it a few feet. "I like this."
Children running in front him, screaming interrupted Mike from his vivid memories. It had been a much different time back then. He had matured so much over the past 4 years.
One thing he was sure off, he was glad he hadn't given up that night or tapped out as Harvey had called it. If he hadn't been working at Pearson and Hardman, he wouldn't be half the person he was today. And he probably wouldn't have built such a wonderful relationship with Rachel. Speaking of which, he had to make it back home.