This day was continuously shitting on me, but I am the causer of this. Staring straight ahead I whispered, "No, because I fucking think I'm in love with you."

And you do crazy things for the people you love. I thought to myself as the guard entered our cell.

If I ever had to give someone advice, I'd tell them one thing.

Don't go surprising the person you think you may love by telling them, I think I'm fucking in love with you.

...and I think that's a pretty bold statement from the girl in prison.

Fuck the standard advice of don't drop the soap. The next new girl on the block is going to receive some pretty deep advice from me.

I haven't seen Lopez since my little confession. She went a little loca and now she's in the shue for a week. I would be lying if I told you I wasn't as frightened as the first time she landed in the shue and blamed me. And this time...it's one hundred percent on me.

Okay, okay.

I didn't pull the trigger so to speak, but I caused that trigger finger to squeeze down and shoot.

Let me take you back a few days when my own little confessional happened, I'll set the scene the moment before Lopez snapped.

"You don't want to know."
"Yeah, 'cause I don't want to be pegged as an accomplice.
"Not that."
"ON YOUR FEET."
"Then what? You don't trust me? But you trust me to go down on you?"
"What? Serious? No, it's not that."
"EYES FORWARD PIERCE YOU TWO ARE NEXT."
"Whatever."
"No, because I fucking think I'm in love with you."

Santana turns as white as she can possible get and refuses all eye contact my way. Her eyes remain forward just like the guard demanded. I wanted to cry, yell, shout, something other than stand there silently and stare forward. I could feel Santana's tension through our connection and there was nothing I could do to ease her or at least explain what I just blurted out for anyone to overhear. The entire block was silent except for the guards riffling through our belongings. Our room was next. I closed my eyes for a split second, I needed to hold back the tears that I felt forming.

"PIERCE OPEN YOUR EYES."

I held them tighter. I couldn't take this guard belittling me right now.

"PIERCE YOU DEAF AND DUMB NOW? I HEARD YOU WERE SLOW BUT FUCK PIERCE, EYES FORWARD AND OPEN!"

I felt the guard's body rub against my breasts while I felt his hot breath on my forehead seeping through his nose and mouth, he was breathing so hard it moved around the stray hairs on my forehead.

"PIERCE, YOU WANT TIME IN THE SHUE? EYES OPEN AND FORWARD SO WE CAN CONTINUE WITH ROOM CHECK." As I was about to open my eyes and comply, I felt the guard take a hold of my breasts and he chuckled, "maybe this will get her to open her eyes, bet this bitch likes a real man fondling her breasts." The other guards laughed along with him.

The moment I opened my eyes, the guard was being pulled off of me. And much to my surprise, it was Lopez. She grabbed him hard and threw him to the ground. The other guards started beating Santana quickly and yelling to throw her in the shue. But none of the guards reported the incident, because everyone in the block saw his guard violate me.

All I saw was Santana being dragged away to the shue, silently. She never made a noise, even when she was getting beat senseless. She silently tore him off me, silently received a beating, and silently without resisting walking herself towards the shue, bloody lip and all. She's in the shue and I know this time is because of me. I told her I may be in love with her and she snapped. She couldn't handle all of that and just snapped. I caused this.

"You are as dumb as they say Pierce."

My eyes shot up and I looked at Alex, "really, you have to make fun of me right now? I'm spilling my heart and secrets to you and-"

Vause cut me off, "bitch, please stop. You realized she risked all of that and pulled that guard off of you because she might just as in love as you are? You ever think of that?"

I stared at Vause. I looked down at the table that rested between us as I moved a rook on the chessboard. "..I..don't..know.."

Vause chuckled, "then you are as dumb as they say. Any lesbian can see that bitch did that out of love-not out of shock at your confessional. And Check."

"Check?" I furrowed my brows at her in confusion.

"My Queen has got your King trapped Pierce, how you going to get of this one?"

What a loaded question. I shook my head and laughed, "like this." I moved around my piece and smiled, "Check. Mate."

Vause crossed her arms over her chest and smiled, "Not as dumb as they say."

I let a crooked smile escape my lips, "Thanks for being a good friend. Not as bad as a friend as they say."

Alex rolled her eyes as she stood up, "I've got to go to work detail. Look, stop playing the martyr and get some rest. You look like shit, when was the last time you slept?" She questioned and didn't expect an answer as she walked away. She's right, though. I need to get some rest, as I stood up to head back to my cell, Miss Pillsbury stopped me.

"Hey there Pierce, tragedy seems to follow you?"

Silently, I stare at her.

"I'm sorry, you're right that was insensitive of me. Can you swing by the office?"

"Now?" I didn't bother looking at her in the eyes as I questioned her while I cleaned up the chess pieces.

"I'd like it if you would make some time for me. I promise you, I can help you."

"You mean rehabilitate me?" I sneered at her.

"Pierce," Pillsbury sweetly spoke as she squeezed my shoulder, "I'm not the guards. I chose my words carefully. I am here to help you. Remember, you put yourself here. Let me help you accept this and we can move on."

I threw my head back and laughed menacingly, "You really don't know me. I fucking know it's my fault I am here. I've accepted what I've done." I walked up close to Pillsbury and got into her face and whispered, "Do you even know what I've done?"

The way I talked to her even gave me chills down my spine. Miss Pillsbury slowly backed off and spoke, "Look you've had a long hard week, I'm going to write you down for an appointment tomorrow, you will report to me instead of work detail. I will report all of this to your guards."

Rolling my eyes I agreed, "Fine, like I have a choice."

"I'll see you bright and early tomorrow." Miss Pillsbury smiled and then walked away.

I took a deep sigh before I started walking. Making it down the block to my cell, was my mission. I started speed walking towards my destination, I just wanted to feel my head on my pillow and smell what scent of Lopez was left there.

As I turned the corner to my room, I saw Red sitting on Santana's bed. My life cannot be simple, can it? I probably should stop talking to myself in my head too. Maybe that's the real problem, my insanity.

"You popular girl." Red said as I entered the room, never looked up from her red fingernails.

"What do you want Red?" I sighed out as I laid flat on my bed, defeated.

Red scoffed, "Nice to see you too girlie."

I gently hit the sides of my bed, "Red, I've had a shit day. I've had a shit week. Just please tell me what you want, so I can try and get some shit sleep."

Red chuckled, "Fine, fine. Just thought you'd want some information I had on your girlfriend."

My head popped back up from laying flat on the bed without a pillow as my arms rested along my torso, "Santana?"

"Is that loco's name?" Red chuckled, "Yeah, girlie. I hear she's not eating in the shue and they are going to bring in the shrink."

"What?" This time I sat up from the laying position I was in.

Red stood up and started leaving my cell, "See girlie, I take care of my girls. I tell you information on your girlfriend. You tell me information."

Confusedly, "What information you think I have?"

"Nothing, yet. Just remember, I'm one who save girlfriend."

"Save?"

Red continued to walk out of my cell.

"What do you mean save?" I shouted as she continued to ignore me.

I let out a deep sigh and collapsed on my bed.

My life is all but simple.

a/n : thanks for reading. thanks for continuing to read. thanks to the new readers. promise i will finish my story. please be kind and rewind (review). :) much love