Adam rested his hand lightly on her back as they made their way from the car park. She'd gone quiet the closer they got to the building and by the time they were ushered upstairs to a waiting room her nerves were shot.

"Officer Burgess." Commander Crowley appeared from behind a glass door and called Kim through. She was surprised and relieved that there was only one other female officer sitting at a small round table, she was expecting to front a panel of Cops.

"First of all, How are you?" she took her seat opposite Kim. The room felt airless and small despite the soaring windows letting in the sun of a Chicago morning.

"I'm good, Thank you." Kim twisted her hands nervously in her lap.

"Keen to get this all over and done with no doubt?" Commander Crowley was not someone you could honestly call empathetic. Kim recalled standing there while she told them that she ran a tyranny when she stupidly hoped that she would be able to continue being partners with Roman after he was shot. In the end it didn't matter because he wasn't cleared for duty but she made her intentions very clear. So sitting in front of her now wasn't exactly pleasant.

Adam paced up and down the hallway until he finally settled on playing some mind numbing time wasting game on his phone. He had texted Al and he was missing nothing at work. He was hoping that something jumped off soon so that he could take his mind off all this and give him something else to focus on.

"You were in a relationship with Officer Ruzek?" Kim was stunned by the question. She had no idea what this had to do with Adam.

"We were engaged."

"And you ended it to start a relationship with your partner?"

"No. We had been separated for a while. For a few months." She battled to keep her voice calm. She wasn't expecting to talk about Adam and their break up. "Sorry what does this have to do with what Roman did to me?"

"We are just establishing a timeline and some background."

The questioning was relentless and took close to two hours. She had to relive every detail of what Roman had done and her reactions. It was harrowing and while she had felt strong the past few days that confidence had been eroded somewhat by the interview. Commander Crowley finally stood up and came and put an arm around her shoulder. "I'm sorry for all the questions but you know it's going to be like this in court. Roman's lawyer is going to try and paint you in a bad light, to try and show that you were emotionally unstable in regards your relationship with Officer Ruzek."

"Is that what Roman is saying? Adam had nothing to do with this; he didn't do anything." Kim cried angrily. "He left us alone. He did nothing?" Kim felt a bubble of rage rise up within her. She hated Roman right now but more than that she hated herself because Adam was about to be thrown back into the middle of it all and he had no idea. He was going to run, she knew it and the thought terrified her.

"You know how it goes. His lawyer will do anything to get him off. We are not going to let that happen." Commander Crowley assured her. "So now, you are on leave for the rest on the week. Are you happy to go back to the 21st. Sergeant Platt is certainly keen to keep you but we will understand if you find it too difficult to go back and will accommodate you."

"I am, and I can go back this week. I want to go back to work. I just want everything to get back to normal."

"Next week." Crowley responded flatly. "Now we want to talk to Officer Ruzek. That is him outside isn't it?"

"Why?"

"Officer Roman went after him, he was used as bait to draw him out. Whether you like it or not he's played some part in all this. I want to talk to him."

Adam jumped up from his chair when the doors opened. "Officer Ruzek." Crowley beckoned him "A few words please." His eyes darted to Kim's face and she just looked stunned.

"I understand you have been very supportive of Officer Burgess recently."

"Yes Mam." He hadn't even thought that he would need to be interviewed.

"Thank you for that. I am sure everyone appreciates it." She opened the folder in front of her. "Did you have any contact with Officer Burgess since the end of your relationship?"

Wow, that question hit him right between the eyes. "Professionally yes, socially no."

"So you didn't threaten or intimidate her at any time?"

"No." he answered flatly.

"You didn't turn up at her place demanding to talk? Call her?"

"No." he repeated.

"You didn't threaten to harm Officer Roman?"

"No." he was getting frustrated and angry. He could hear Al's voice in his head from when he was jammed up on that Undercover Op that went sideways. Always stay calm and keep your answers short. Give them only what they need to hear. "I'm sorry, has he accused me of something?"

"We just want to make sure your version of events matches the reports." He was then asked to describe the night Roman was arrested. Where he was in the hours before hand, what happened when Roman turned up at his place? "I was with Officer Burgess. She was under Police Protection."

"You left her to participate in Roman's arrest?"

"At the request of my Sergeant. Yes I did."

"You went to see him the following day. We have record of you checking in to the Holding Cell."

"I did."

"And?"

"And what? I wanted to see him and ask him why he did it, that was it. Ask anyone who was there. Do you think I was stupid enough not to make sure I had a witness." Adam had insisted that the Guard stood close by, close enough to hear what was going on but out of Roman's sight.

"We will be talking to him also."

"What was that all about?" Kim flew at him when Adam came out. She had been almost running up and down the hall while she waited. If she had known he was going to be questioned she would have never let him come with her today.

"They just wanted to check a few things."

"Adam I'm sorry you've been dragged into all this."

"Don't worry about it." He brushed her off gruffly. He was a little pissed and annoyed that Roman was obviously throwing mud hoping some of it would stick. He had no idea how much of it Kim was aware of. "How'd you go?" Again he rested a hand on her back as he steered her towards his truck, at least that was a little be comforting.

"They certainly wanted to know every little detail." Kim was still wringing her hands as he put the truck into drive and pulled out into the traffic. "I can't go back to work this week. The burn needs to heal and needs to be cleared by the Doctors. I also need to see a counsellor."

She could see that he was annoyed by something and in no mood to talk. "Can we go to the District?"

"Sure, why?"

"I want to thank everyone for their help and support. I need to walk through those doors again. The longer I put it off the harder it will be."

"It's the same place."

"I know. Good thing about work is that I have some good memories of that place. Nothing bad happened there."

"Well you did meet Roman there." He added somewhat bitterly without taking his eyes off the road.

"Yeah, but good things also happened?"

"Such as?" His voice was flat.

"I met you there."

"Among other things." He hoped that one day the good memories would outweigh the bad. It was also the place she broke his heart. Then again the courtroom was way worse, that's were his broken heart was shattered into a million pieces. "Wasn't all beer and skittles."

"Please let me remember the good times. That's all I have."

"Sorry." He muttered.

"Well well look who's here." Platt looked happy to see them. Burgess stayed downstairs while Adam disappeared upstairs and back to work without a word.

"How'd it go?" Al saw him first.

"Fine." He slung his jacket over the back of his chair and grabbed his coffee mug and Erin followed him into the break room.

"How's Kim?"

"She's good. She's downstairs talking to Platt. I am sure she'll be up soon. She wants to see everyone."

"And you?"

"I'm fine, I wish people would stop asking." The morning had unsettled him. He hadn't expected to be questioned and he hated that Roman seemed to be suggesting that he hurt or scared Kim in anyway. That had made his blood boil. Also getting closer and closer to Kim was driving him insane. He knew what he wanted, but had no idea whether Kim did and it certainly wasn't the time or place to even contemplate it.

"And you and Burgess?" Ruzek snapped his head up and Erin saw his eyes harden.

"She needs a friend. That's all I am doing. I would never take advantage of her or the situation." He spat out.

Erin rested a hand on his arm. "Hey Adam, that's not what I meant. I know you are helping her. It's great what you are doing, but you and I both know that you still love her."

"Erin, please drop it." He stormed from the room and sat back at his desk, opened his emails and tried to focus on work. He heard the gate open and footsteps on the stairs and he knew it would be Kim on her way up.

"Hey." Antonio jumped up from his desk and held out his arms for a hug. He dropped them quickly when he noticed the hesitant look on her face. "It's good to see you." The rest of the team followed and Kim looked uncomfortable with all the attention. Except Adam, he stayed at his desk and kept working.

"I just wanted to thank you all for everything, for all your help." Her voice wobbled a little. She was acutely aware that Adam was still just sitting at his desk while everyone else was gathered around her and that made her even more emotional. She didn't really know what she'd done or what had happened between leaving the Ivory Tower and here. "I really appreciate it."

Kim didn't stay long. Voight came out of his office with a job for them and she made a hasty exit somewhat confused. Adam had been beside her all morning and suddenly he seemed to withdraw from her.

'You okay?' She stewed on it all afternoon because in reality she didn't have much else to do and finally sent him a message.

'Yep. We are pretty slammed at the moment.' His response did nothing to ease her mind. Everything was so confusing one minute he was beside her and physically close. There was the hand on her back or at her elbow helping her into the car. He turned up with breakfast, made sure she didn't go to her interview alone and now he was miles away. Up in Intelligence he barely looked at her. Tears stung at her eyes. She just needed stability in her life at the moment and this wasn't it.

Adam called her later that night. He had got his wish, something had jumped off and they were flat out with it. "I've only got a minute. We are pretty jammed up. You're okay right?"

"I am. Adam, did I do something to upset you?"

"No." Again his response didn't exactly relieve her fears. "Look, I've gotta go. We'll be lucky to get out of here before the morning." He didn't say what they were doing but it wasn't unusual for them to work all night. Nor did he say when she would see him again.

It wasn't Kim that had done anything. It was Erin. It was her comment about what was going on between the two of them and that he still loved her. He knew he still loved her and didn't need anyone pointing that out. However he hated the thought that people would think he was taking advantage of her because she was vulnerable. That would make him as bad as Roman. It irked him and before he could stop himself he was pulling away and he hated himself for it.

"What's eating you?" Al handed him a coffee. It was almost 2am and they were doing surviellance. It was long and boring. He'd never quite got the hang of all the waiting around. It wasn't his thing…the waiting game.

"Nothing."

"Let me guess?" Al scoffed. "Burgess?"

"I don't want people to think I am taking advantage of the situation or her."

"No-one thinks that, we all know you care about her."

He stared out the window at the house. It was as dark as his mood. "I still lover her Al. I can't stop myself."

"So what do you want to happen?"

"I want her to feel safe, I want Roman gone and from there who knows." He shrugged. "We may never get back what we had and I don't want to hurt her and I don't want to get hurt either."

"You'll never know if you don't try."

"And if it doesn't work? Everyone gets hurt."

"Everyone is hurting already. You'll always wonder what if." It was a change for Al. he had been the one to tell him to focus on his job rather than chase tail. He'd thrown his marriage away for a child that he accepted as his own without really knowing. He lived in a garage for years. Taking relationship advice from his partner could be the stupidest thing Adam ever did. "Have you even asked her what she wants? You might be freaking out over nothing. She might be completely over you."

Wow. Way to kick him in the balls. Everyone was taking aim at his balls lately and no one was missing. "Thanks Al." he muttered as he sunk lower in his seat and spent the next few hours sulking.

Kim hated that he was suddenly not around anymore. A few text messages and a couple of phone calls was all she got over the next few days. He kept telling her that nothing was wrong and they were just busy at work, which was probably true but it was more the tone of his voice that worried her. He seemed to be distancing himself from her, ever since that day at the Ivory Tower. What had actually happened that day? What changed?

It wasn't until the weekend that she actually saw him again. He turned up with breakfast on Saturday morning. "Sorry, it's been a busy week." He shrugged as he handed over a coffee. It wasn't exactly a satisfactory explanation but it was all he was giving her. "How've you been?"

"Not great."

"Why? What's wrong?" He stepped towards her, his heart suddenly beating wildly.

"You. I obviously did something to upset you."

"You didn't. I've been busy this week that's all."

"No, that's not all Adam and you know it. What did I do?" She took a step back. Being close to him was too much.

"Nothing. It was nothing you did. It's just.." he rubbed his hands over his face wearily. "..I don't want people to think that I am taking advantage of the situation."

"What situation?"

"You, you are vulnerable and I don't want people to think I am making a move on you."

"God, it is so far from the truth. You are the friend I need right now."

"That's all it can be." Adam hated it, he hated the look on her face and he hated the way it made him feel "You and I can only be friends."

Kim nodded sadly. "I know."

It wasn't the best resolution and it had been somewhat awkward for a few days but gradually they started to relax around each other again.

Right now she was standing outside the Counsellor's office checking her phone for the umpteenth time. She had already been waiting half an hour. The mandatory Counselling was painful and she wasn't sure it was helping. Today it made her angry and standing on the pavement being buffeted by the chill wind that was whipping up the street wasn't helping her mood.

Suddenly his truck slid into the curb and he leant over and opened the door. "Sorry I am late."

"It's freezing." Kim commented.

"How'd you go?"

Kim had her arms tightly wrapped around her waist trying to warm up and mumbled that it was fine. He stole a look at her while he drove and decided it was best not to push her.

"Did you still need to stop at the grocery store?"

"That would be good. Thank you." Kim's tone was short and he just assumed that the session had left her feeling a little battered as they often did. She would crawl into a hole for a few hours or a few days and lick her wounds before shaking it off and emerging from her shell.

Adam followed her around the Grocery store with her basket and she would drop things into it without looking at him or speaking. "You seem angry."

"I am."

"At me?"

"You know what? Yes, today I am angry at you." She snapped.

Adam breathed out slowly. "Okay. Are you going to tell me why?"

"Not right now." Kim snatched the basket from his hand and he rolled his shoulders and shoved his hands into his pockets and kept his distance as she marched around the store. He noted that she was choosing a high proportion of chocolate and cookies. A sure fire sign that she was pissed.

When they got back to his truck he apologised again for being late and Kim nodded tightly at him and went back to staring out the window. He carried her groceries inside and put them in the kitchen. "You going to talk to me now?" He watched her carefully as she ignored him and started scrolling through her phone.

"No."

"Typical." He snapped.

Kim slammed her phone down on the bench. "What the fuck does that mean?"

Throwing his hands in the air he snapped back at her. "Again you are pissed at me and I am supposed to just figure it out myself. Sound familiar?"

"Fine. Yes I am pissed at you. Today I am pissed at you because today I blame you. Okay?"

'You blame me. For what?" He knew getting angry with her wasn't a good idea and that he needed to stay calm but he didn't need this.

"For everything. Today I blame you for this. All this." She waved her arms around wildly. "I blame you for having to go to a Counsellor and relieve every single little thing that happened to me. I am angry at you because if you had fought for me, cared about our relationship at all I wouldn't be in this situation." Kim exploded.

"Wow." Adam knew something like this had to happen. As Kim worked through all her emotions at some point she would point the finger squarely at him as she tried to rationalise everything that had happened. Hell, he'd even blamed himself initially. Some days he still did.

Her eyes were wild. "Are you happy now?"

"No. I am not happy. You know what? I blame myself too!"

"It's all so fucked up."

"Do you want me to go?"

"Sure. Walk away, that's what you are good at." He took a step back like he'd been hit.

"That's not fair. You were pretty good at walking away too. Remember?"

They were both pretty sure that they had to go through these moments if they were going to have any hope of putting it behind him. How they came out of it was yet to be seen. Maybe at the end of it all even being friends would be impossible let alone anything else. "Fine you want to blame me, go ahead. If that makes you feel better." Kim spat at him.

Her bitterness was staggering and Adam tried not to let himself get carried away by it. "It doesn't make me feel better. It makes me feel like shit. I know I let you down; it kills me knowing that I couldn't stop this happening to you. Every single time I see you I am reminded how I failed to protect you, but don't you dare blame me for what Roman did to you. You were safe with me but you didn't want me."

"I did. You didn't want me. You let me go. You told me to date him if I wanted to. It didn't seem like you really cared one way or the other."

"That's what you took out of that day? You didn't see how much I was hurting? You never saw me. You never saw how much pain I was in. Or perhaps you did and just didn't give a fuck. If you didn't already want him nothing I said or did would have made any difference. You were always stronger than that, you were strong and determined and knew what you wanted. When did I ever tell you what to do? You always did what you wanted."

He was on a roll and something had been eating at him lately so he decided now was the time to lay it on the table. "Since the day I met you all you wanted was to be in Intelligence. Hell we even snuck around for months so as not to ruin your chances and then he came along and suddenly everything you dreamed of and worked for went out the window. He convinced you that we were a bunch of righteous pricks and he wanted to keep you on Patrol and under his control. Right from the start."

"You didn't want me in Intelligence."

"What?" He was genuinely shocked by that comment. "I always supported you, I was always happy when you came up to work with us. I would have supported you no matter what. Don't throw that at me. When did I ever not support you at work?"

"There is no sin in being on Patrol. Ask your father about that?"

"I never said there was, it's just not what you wanted until he showed up and started manipulating you. It must have been all part of his plan; he was into you from the start. Admit it."

"Give me some credit, I made up my own mind."

"Like when you decided that I didn't want to marry you?" By the look on her face he knew that he had hit her below the belt with that comment.

"Thanks Adam, thank you very fucking much for pointing that out again."

"Look, sorry. I am just tyring to be honest with you. That is what you wanted isn't it? For me to talk to you, so here we are talking. Or do you only want to talk about me and how I fucked up?"

"I never said it was all your fault."

"Yet at the time you did. It was all me and what I didn't do, I didn't marry you instantly, I didn't fight for you, I didn't pass your push test, I didn't come crawling back begging you to take me back while you were fucking him."

You didn't care."

It was her turn to hurt him and those words hurt more than anything. "That's bullshit and you know it. Don't you ever tell me that I didn't care." His voice shook so much it shocked both of them.

"All I wanted was someone who wanted to be with me."

"I asked you to marry me. What more could I do?"

"Actually marry me." Kim spat back at him.

Adam pressed his hands over his eyes and gritted his teeth. Get it together, he told himself. "Look I am sorry I was late, I am sorry you had to relive everything. I'm sorry for everything that happened to you. I was late because I drove across town to get you something. I thought you'd like it." He put a small bag on the bench. "I don't know what else you want me to do. I am trying."

Their argument was like a sparkler, it flashed quickly and brightly and fizzled out to nothing just as quickly. "I know." Kim's voice softened. "Today was really hard. They asked a lot about you today. I don't blame you, for any of this. You know that right?"

"Some days I am not so sure. Some days I blame myself."

Kim reached out for his hand as he reached for his car keys and phone. "Please don't. It's not your fault. None of this is. All of this is on Roman."

"It's okay Kim." He squeezed her hand. "I'll see you later."

The place felt empty suddenly. Just a few moments ago it was filled with life and fire and now the silence was deafening. Finding herself in the kitchen she picked up the bag he left and opened it to find a packet of Tim Tams, probably the best Chocolate Biscuits on the planet. He had driven across town to get them for her, she knew how hard they were to get. It meant so much, the little things he did.

He wasn't big on the over the top romance, it had always been the little things, the small and thoughtful and unexpected things he did. Like the notes he would leave in her bag, or dropping lunch off when she was working on the weekends or recording her favourite show. The cup of coffee he always left beside her bed when he left for work when she was still asleep or booking her in for a massage after a busy week at work. And of course, driving across town to hunt down her favourite treat.

Why then had she just expected that he was going to come in and sweep her off her feet with some grand gesture to win her back?

Why did she expect him to be someone he wasn't?