"Officer Burgess." Platt sounded so official and it made Burgess stop dead in her tracks. It had been a long shift, they were cold and wet and all she wanted to do was get out of her wet uniform, have a hot shower and go home. Polyester did not do well in the rain. Coupled with the bitter cold, the rain had started the moment they had stepped out of the station and they had chased idiots all afternoon.

"Yes." She rolled her eyes, almost expecting to be sent out on some other useless errand. Her new partner, James Logan took one look at Platt who dismissed him with a quick flick of her head and he disappeared as fast as he could. He had been here almost a month now and learnt pretty damn fast when it was best to avoid the snarky desk Sergeant.

"A word." Platt pointed to the vacant office. Reluctantly Burgess followed her. Her mind was a little frantic as she tried to think of what she had done lately that could possibly put Platt in this type of mood. Nothing came to mind.

Kim hopped from foot to foot trying to warm herself up. "Is there a problem Sarge?"

"I had a visitor today. Sean Roman's Aunt."

"Oh." That hadn't even crossed her mind. They had successfully put him firmly in the past and for the most part that's where he stayed.

"He's in Chicago Med. He's been assaulted in Prison and in pretty bad shape. His Aunt gave me this." She pulled a letter from her pocket and held it out for Burgess to take. Kim stared at the letter in her hands and shook her head. She shoved her own hands in her jacket pockets. "I don't want it."

"I completely understand."

"What does it say?"

"I don't know." Platt put in on the desk. "Read it or don't. Doesn't matter either way to me."

Kim turned on her heel and left it sitting on the desk. Platt picked up the letter and put it back in her pocket. At some point she might come back for it.

Why now? Why fucking now? Kim ripped off her vest and threw it in the bottom of her locker. Finally she was back on an even keel with a new partner. They seemed to be settling in well and developing a good grove. Platt had finally stopped rotating her partners when she was happy with her choice. Adam was getting on top of things after his father's death and they were happy growing closer together. The celibacy wasn't easy and Adam tried to hide his frustration, unsuccessfully at times. It wasn't all beer and skittles for her either because he was trying so hard and respecting her choices and that made it all the more difficult.

And now this…Sean Roman was fucking with them again.

"Hey Kim." Adam caught sight of her as he was passing the locker room. They had a big case going on at the moment and he hadn't really seen her for a few days so he doubled back and slipped in quickly. "You look….wet." he cocked his head to the side but his smile faded as he sensed her mood. "…And pissed."

"I am wet and cold." She forced herself to smile. While all this was spinning in her head she didn't want to talk to him about it just yet and he didn't need to be distracted right now. "How are you? Still chasing tail?"

"Unfortunately yes. I am not sure what time I'll get out of here tonight. Sorry." He leant in for a quick kiss. "Hey, you sure you're okay?"

"Yep." She squeezed his arm lightly. "Get back to work before they miss you and be careful. I'll talk to you soon."

Kim changed quickly and on her way past Platt's desk she held out her hand silently and Platt handed her the letter. She shoved it in her bag without a word. She had no idea if she was going to read it or not, that decision was a long way off. She needed to get her own head around it and then talk to Adam about it. The weight of the letter suddenly made the bag she was carrying feel like it was full of bricks.

By the time she got home she had worked herself up into a right state so she called her sister. "Throw it out." Amanda answered without a moment's hesitation. "Why do you care what it says?"

"I don't." Kim started "I don't know. It's all so fucked up."

"What did Adam say?"

"I haven't told him yet."

Amanda groaned loudly. This is what got them into the situation in the first place, her inability to talk to him. She thought they were past all this. Kim had assured her that they were good. "Kim, let's not do this again."

"No, I will tell him as soon as I see him. They are in the middle of a big case at the moment and I only saw him for a few seconds I am not going to dump it on him right now. As soon as he gets home I promise I will tell him." They had learnt from the lessons of the past, she talked to him…constantly. She smiled to herself recalling how he had pulled her up on it recently. "Burgess you don't need to tell me every single time you are feeling crappy. I know when you are closed for maintenance." as he liked to call it when she had her period "I can tell. I'm a guy and there is such a thing as too much information."

"What are you going to do until then?"

"I am going to the gym for starters." Kim was already lacing up her trainers. "And then I think I am going to meet Sylvie and Maggie at Molly's for a drink."

"Good plan." Amanda agreed. "and if you do want to read it and Adam's not around. Let me know."

It played on her mind all evening. Not even the gym, which usually allowed her to tune out, did the trick. Sylvie and Maggie both picked up on her mood but she wanted to talk about it with Adam first. She owed him that. They were in this together and he had been there for her through all her ups and downs, and there had been more than a few. Lately they had hit clear water.

Kim had moved into a new apartment just after Adam's father passed away and he would occasionally spend his nights there, usually after a long hard case. So far they had managed to continue to share a bed without the need for sex. Well, there was a need for sex, a desperate need. It was just this 'fucking celibacy challenge' as Adam called it when he was particularly frustrated.

Kim was surprised to see him when she got home from Molly's. "Hi.".

He hadn't let her know he was finishing up for the night and hadn't really been expecting to see him until much later, if at all.

"Hey." He dropped the remote on the table and jumped up to greet her. She knew that something was bothering him the instant he pulled away quickly from her hug.

"You know don't you?" she didn't even bother to try small talk.

"I know that he is in hospital." Voight had called him into his office, which was the scene of very little good news. He had told him that Roman had been assaulted in prison, pretty badly. Adam couldn't deny that he felt some satisfaction in hearing the news. "Can't say I am upset about it."

"That's all I know too. I'm sorry I didn't tell you earlier but you were busy and I didn't want to distract you. We only had a minute."

"I don't care about that Kim. I want to know that you are okay?" he grabbed her shoulders and held her at arms length so he could see her face. "Are you okay?"

"I really don't know. I have tried not to think about it…" she reached into her bag which was still sitting on the chair where she had left it when she came home. "…or this." She handed him the letter.

"What is it?"

"His Aunt dropped it off at the District for me. I don't know what it says. I haven't read it. Initially I told Platt I didn't want it."

"Do you want to read it?"

"No." Kim had made her decision. "I want you to though."

"Why?" Adam was trying not to let himself get carried away. His anger towards Sean Roman was still very real and very volatile. Occasionally Kim had seen it bubbling away under the surface. It would be when a memory came back or he asked about something and she baulked. Sometimes she flinched when he touched her suddenly and he hated it. He hated that Roman had made her like that and the anger would come rushing up inside him.

"Because I know you are stronger than me and I know you will tell me what I need to know and if I don't need to know anything you won't tell me and I'll be okay with that."

"Kim that makes no sense. You either need to read it yourself or I burn it."

A suddenly flicker of pain flitted across her face. "Burn it?" She barely got the words out. Shrugging her shoulders so that he loosened his grip she stepped away from him. Apart from the fact that she had suffered from that burn on her chest she had also eventually told him about the night he had made her sit and watch as he burned every single memory she had kept from Adam.

"Yes, burn it. He burnt things that obviously meant a lot to you, although at the time that was debatable so why not give him the same courtesy." Adam was surprised he was so blunt about it and by the look on Kim's face so was she.

Kim threw her hands in the air and stormed into the kitchen. "Thanks for that." She yanked open the fridge door. "Do you want dinner?"

"Sure." He grabbed his bag. "I'm going to grab a shower. Is that okay?"

"Whatever Adam." She slammed the oven door shut as she put the lasagne in the oven to heat up.

When he returned he had calmed down a little, they both had. "What are you going to do?" He nodded at the letter still sitting on the table as Kim handed him a beer. He leant against the kitchen counter as she made a salad to go with the lasagne.

"I don't know. Do you think I should read it? Seriously Adam, I want to know what you think." She came and stood in front of him and rested one arm on his waist.

"I am comfortable with whatever you choose."

She pushed him lightly. "That doesn't help me."

"What do you want me to say? If I say don't read it you will never know what it says and at some point you may regret it and blame me. And if I say read it and it's not what you want to hear then we are right back at square one."

"I just want your opinion. Whatever I decide will be my decision alone. Either way your support would be appreciated."

"I support you." It was the best he could do. He didn't want her to read it; he didn't want her to be dragged back in by Roman. He hated the guy, like nothing else on earth and the thought of him being in her head again pissed him off. Even now, he was fucking with her mind and all with a fucking letter in an envelope sitting on her dining table.

"But?" she knew there was a but.

"But…. I don't want you to read it. I don't want you to have anything to do with him. Ever again. He's been fucking with your mind for months, he's still doing it." He tapped his temple angrily.

"You know that was the first thing I thought when Platt told me about the letter. That he was screwing with me again, with both of us. Why now?" She returned to preparing the salad while Adam grabbed some plates and cutlery.

He moved the letter off the table while they ate and it wasn't until later that night as Adam was laying with his head in Kim's lap did they talk about it again and only briefly. "Can you stay tonight? I know I am going to think about that letter all night but having you here gives me something else to focus on."

"What? Like the fact that we are in bed together and not having sex?" He didn't even open his eyes. "That certainly does take most of my focus, energy and willpower to stop myself jumping your bones."

"It's not easy for me either. The fact that you insist on sleeping in just your boxers does not help."

"Nowhere in the rules of this little experiment did you tell me that I needed to keep all my clothes on." Adam smiled sweetly. "I saw you sneaking a peak at me in the shower while you were cleaning your teeth the other morning. Don't think I didn't notice."

"Nowhere in the rules did I say I couldn't look."

"Fair point." Adam sat up and turned to face Kim. "So, what are you going to do?"

"I haven't decided but when I do you will be the first to know."

It was over breakfast the next morning that Kim told him of her decision. "I am going to read the letter."

"Okay." He had hoped for a different outcome. It confused him a little. Was she hoping for an apology? An explanation? Was he asking for forgiveness? That he didn't deserve, he didn't deserve anything but it was not his decision and as much as it pissed him off he needed to push it aside and support Kim. He couldn't let her down now.

Adam was in the shower when she read it. She sat on the edge of the bed and nervously pulled the letter from its envelope.

Dear Kim,

I don't know how to even start this.

I was there, in court that day and I heard what my nephew did to you and my world shattered. I was so ashamed. I wanted to talk to you so many times and apologise even though I know it wasn't me that you needed an apology from.

However, I do want to thank you for being so brave, for having the courage to stand up to Sean and say that what he did wasn't right. To stand up for all those women who didn't have the chance to stand up for themselves.

I don't know why he did it. I know his mother would be devastated to know that her son was capable of something so terrible. I am glad my sister isn't around to see it; it would break her heart.

I went and asked him why, and I got nothing. He did tell me that he regretted that you were hurt and that you didn't deserve it but he couldn't tell me why. I don't know if you want to know why he did it, I don't know if that would make it better or worse for you.

Finally, if you are still reading this. I really hope that you are able to move on with your life and wish you every joy and happiness in the world.

Take care, Anthea Davis.

She had scrawled on the bottom of the letter. 'He's in Chicago Med, he wants to see you.'

Kim left it on the bed and walked out of the room. Adam saw it when he came out. He picked it up and read it. He knew that Kim didn't want to keep it from him, she wanted him to know what it said; she wasn't about to keep anything from him. When he was done he walked out of the room and pulled her straight into his arms. Up until them she hadn't let herself cry but as soon as Adam held her that resolve crumbled.

"It wasn't what you were expecting hey?"

"No."