Tabella's was the perfect little Italian restaurant for a romantic first date. Candles adorned every table, setting the entire restaurant aglow and creating an ambiance that inspired thoughts of kissing and canoodling in every person who walked through the door. Every person except for Liz, that is.

"This is creepy." Liz glared across the table at Red, who had the good sense to look apologetic.

"I'm sorry, but I started something on a whim and now I have to follow through," he said, twisting a particularly long piece of spaghetti around and around his fork. "And this way he won't be able to lie when we ask him how it went. I have the distinct feeling that more than a few of his dates never made it back from the ladies' room."

Liz rolled her eyes, loyalty to her friend overriding the niggling feeling that what Red said was true. "He's not that bad. In fact, he's really cute...in a friendly puppy dog sort of way."

"And women that want a friendly puppy dog following them around go to the pound and get just that." Red leaned slightly to the left, eyeing the center table where Aram sat with his date, oblivious to their audience. "He's tanking."

Liz turned her head discreetly to see what Reddington was seeing. "He's doing fine! Look at her! She's giggling! And you've heard the jokes he tells. She must really be into him."

And Aram really seemed to be into her. The stunning brunette tossed her hair and Aram smiled a mile wide. He could really have downplayed the eagerness, but Liz was not going to point that out, not with Red dooming their date to failure before dessert had even been served.

"Or Vanessa is just a spectacular actress." Liz shot a look in Red's direction, but he ignored her and sipped his wine, squinting his eyes in Aram's direction. "How many times can one man straighten his tie?"

"As many times as he likes." Liz resisted the urge to turn and look again. The couple deserved a little bit of privacy, at least. "And if you think he's doing it all wrong, why don't you show him how it's done?"

Red's eyebrows shot up in interest. "Lessons? In picking up women?"

"No, he's already got the woman."

"No, I got him the woman. Next time I'll let him get the woman himself."

"How kind of you," Liz scoffed, busying herself with her lasagna to stop herself from spying on Aram. She would not stoop to the level of creepiness Red seemed so fond of exuding.

"I thought it was rather generous." Red couldn't seem to tear his eyes away from Aram's table, distaste written across his features. "But in all seriousness, I really think I should drag him to the men's room by that stupid tie and give him a few pointers."

"Don't you dare!"

"You know I dare. At the rate he's going he won't make it to first base tonight."

Aram would have been mortified if he could hear the conversation. As it was, Liz was mortified for him. "It's the first date! How far can you possibly expect to get on the first date?" Red eyed her breasts pointedly and Liz blushed. "Well some men are gentlemen and don't need to get handsy on the first date. And his tie is not stupid. It matches his suit perfectly."

Red's fingers automatically reached up to stroke his own tie, and Liz bit her tongue. If he was fishing for compliments, tonight was not the night.

"Let me ask you something, Lizzie. If Aram is such a perfectly dressed, charming gentleman, then why aren't you dating him?" Liz laughed slightly, but her smile faded when Red didn't laugh with her. He was serious.

"Oh, come on! You know Aram and I would never work. He's too eager to please and right now I'm not too eager to please anyone." Lucky for her, Red seemed to accept this answer and instead of questioning her further, turned his attention towards flagging a waiter for dessert, ordering for the both of them as if it were the most natural thing in the world. She would have been offended, but tiramisu squashed any argument she could have made in defense of feminism. "Besides, I'm off of dating. No more dating."

"Really?" Red didn't look convinced. "So, if a dashing man in a three-piece suit with a startlingly fashionable sense of style asked you to, say, a charming little Italian restaurant to wine and dine you for a couple of hours, you'd say no?"

The return of the waiter with the tiramisu only fractionally softened Liz's ire. "You asked me to dinner to "discuss an interesting case"! Then I get here and the interesting case is Aram. I'm not exactly feeling charmed at the moment."

"But you are being wined and dined," Red said smugly, dipping victoriously into his tiramisu. "And Aram on a date is the most interesting thing I've seen in a month. The man let her order her own dessert. Who does that?"

"Considerate men who think that maybe not everyone likes tiramisu," Liz shot back as she took another bite of hers.

Red grinned. "I'll keep that in mind for next time."

Liz couldn't help but grin back, and for a moment she actually considered a next time.

"Shit. They're leaving."

And then the moment was gone.

Red frowned as Aram and his date left the restaurant. "I need to get the check."

"Okay, you are taking this "following through" thing way too seriously, Reddington," Liz said, watching in amazement as Red scrambled to dig out cash from his breast pocket. "Besides, we don't even know where they're going."

"Well I would have known, had I not been distracted by someone and her tiramisu!"

Liz let out a little squeal as her jacket was thrown over her shoulders and she was hauled out of her seat by her arm, attracting the attention of every patron in the restaurant.

"Excuse me, Miss," the little waiter interrupted as they made their way through the restaurant, "do you need help?"

Red glared and Liz stifled a giggle. The boy was lucky Red had already left his tip.

"No, thank you. We're just playing a game." Liz smiled as Red's hand left her arm and traveled all the way down to grasp her fingers. "And he's losing." He tugged sharply on her hand and practically ran her out of the restaurant and onto the street, where Aram's car was nowhere to be found. "They're gone."

"Yes, I can see that, Lizzie," Red snapped.

"You know, I don't understand why you care so much about what happens on this date. Normal people set up a blind date for their friends and just hope for the best, but no...not you. You have to escort them personally."

"I'm just concerned. Aram is a good guy and I wasn't really thinking when I set him up with Vanessa. Not with my head, anyway." Red flushed slightly and Liz extracted her hand from his grasp.

"Let me guess...Vanessa is the wife and or ex-wife of a good buddy of yours who just so happens to be the leader of an international drug cartel with a special love for opera and carving knives."

"Way off base. Vanessa's never been married."

"Then her father's the leader of an international dru..."

"Wrong!" Red waved a little at the black Sedan at the end of the street and the lights came on as the car started. "And just who do you think I hang out with?"

"No one that I want to be around." Liz crossed her arms and waited for Dembe to park the car in front of them. "Have you slept with her?"

Red licked his lips. "That's not any of your business."

"I think it is."

"Ex lovers are third date conversations, and we are only on the first date."

"We're not on a date, and if we were, you'd be blowing it."

"Maybe. But then I'd make up for it with charm and grace and not a small amount of chivalry." Red took her hand as he escorted her into the backseat of the car.

"Chivalry only goes so far. But honesty..."

"Fine." Red gestured at Dembe and he drove, though no one had specified a destination. "Vanessa just happens to be bit more...advanced than I think Aram is, and by the time I realized that this might be a bad idea, he was already on his way to pick her up."

"I don't understand. You wanted the date to go well. You were rooting for Aram to get the girl." Liz was utterly confused, much like every other time she and Red engaged in a conversation that lasted more than five minutes.

"I was rooting for first base. A little above-the-blouse action. Vanessa will take him around to fifth base and back again."

Liz's jaw dropped. "There's a fifth base?"

Red patted her hand, the tips of his fingers dangerously close to the inside of her thigh. "Again, third date conversation."

"Red?" Liz cleared her throat, a horrible realization dawning on her. "Exactly how do you know Vanessa?"

Red pursed his lips and turned from her to face the window. "She's a business associate."

"What kind of business?"

There was a long pause and then a sigh. "Sales."

"Red?"

"Yes?" Red turned back towards her, cool and calm and obviously expecting her next question.

Liz gritted her teeth. "Is my friend out with a prostitute?"

Red smiled. "All the way to fifth base."

"Reddington, I'm going to kick your ass!" Liz groaned.

Red turned back towards the window. "I can't wait for the third date..."