There were only a few things that Yennefer enjoyed more than taking a long warm bath with her handsome witcher, however after another long day of discussions with king Demavend and his council, she could not stop worrying.
Geralt washed her back gently, rubbing the soap soaked sponge on her skin. She never had that level of intimacy with anyone, not even with Val. She had heard Geralt's thoughts when they met, she knew that he had analyzed every detail of her with his sharp witcher eyes and did not take him much time to realize how she was before her appearance was changed magically in Aretuza. After all these years, she still felt very self-conscious about her back, like in any moment it could transform to its original monstrous form. Geralt knew the truth, however, she never let him know that she was aware that he knew. She fought the bitter self-consciousness she was feeling. He knows and he is still here.
Like he had heard her thoughts, he leaned in and kissed the spot between her shoulder blades.
"…she is still so tense, the discussions with that king must have not ended yet," she heard him think. She often avoided reading his mind, however, sometimes she could not control her own vanity and curiosity. There were other times when she was over sensitized and then it felt like she could not stop the flow of thoughts.
"I'm running out of time," complained Yennefer leaning her back against Geralt chest. He rubbed the sponge carefully over her thigh. He did not protest anymore when she answered to his thoughts. "Too bad that intelligence is not a requirement to be a king, only blood bonds, how stupid".
"Perhaps if the excess of adulation did not blind them so much…"
Yennefer turned around suddenly, splashing water over the marble floor.
"Witcher, you might have saved my neck," Yennefer smiled triumphantly because now she knew what she had to do to convince Demavend to make a peace treaty with the kaewendi king.
"I'm always happy to save your beautiful neck," he smiled handsomely and kissed her neck softly. Finally, Yennefer let herself relax, while she architected a plan.
"I cannot agree with this madness!" Exclaimed the fat man called Adonis Wetterwulff, he was the head of Chamber of Commerce of Vengerberg.
Erik Van Eend, chief of the spies, nodded in agreement, "it is too risky to travel to the Pontar, Your Majesty".
"I'll ensure our King's safety," Yennefer said harshly. As she had expected, she did not get support from the rest of the council when she proposed that the king should see with his own eyes the state of the northern border. She hoped that the king would listen to her this time.
King Demavend looked at her carefully and Yennefer held his blue gaze.
"Do not listen to her, your Majesty, I beg..." Cried the old duke of the Valley of the Flowers, Simmon Danos, he hushed quickly when the king held his hand up on his direction, still looking intensely at the sorceress.
I'm going to cast a spell on this damn king and these fat rats, I'm so close of losing it, thought Yennefer not exteriorizing her impatience.
"Lady Yennefer is right. A king should not hide behind stone walls, how are my men supposed to fight for me if they think I'm a coward?"
The rest of the council members looked at each other, not daring to argue with the king. Yennefer breathed relieved discretely.
"We will arrange this expedition as soon as possible…"
"Excuse me, your Majesty," interrupted politely Yennefer, "we can be there in a few moments, if your Majesty desires so…"
"With portals?" Smirked the king curious.
"Yes and there is no reason to worry, my portals are very stable and safe," smiled back Yennefer, triumphantly.
"Then we will go to Hagge right now," said the king decided, "we will meet Commander Mandeville, I want to hear the report of the situation from him".
"Yes, your Majesty," the sorceress nodded politely. She got up and visualizing the fort near the Pontar river she casted a portal.
"Please hold onto me, your Majesty," Yennefer could not help but catch a glimpse of his thoughts about her when he held her by the waist and felt disgusted.
They arrived moments later in the dinner room of the Hagge fort, interrupting a meeting between the Commander and his men, whom surprised, left quickly the room when they realized who had interrupt their meeting.
Commander Mance Mandeville was a handsome man in his early forties. His black hair and well trimmed beard had flecks of white and his dark eyes were smart and attentive. He and Yennefer had a brief affair when he was a young general, many years ago. She was his last adventure before getting married and he was a small distraction for her. His military career had been brilliant so far. Ten years ago he had successfully lead the troops of then newly enthroned king Demavend and repealed the invasion of the neighbor country. He quickly rose the military hierarchy to become commander of the special forces of Aedirn, winning also the friendship of the king.
"Your Majesty, what a pleasant surprise," bowed respectfully Commander Mandeville and then smiled handsomely to the sorceress, greeting her, "Lady Yennefer."
"Mance, I'm here because I want to see with my own eyes the situation."
"Of course, Your Majesty," said Mance politely walking to the table to show a strategic map. "Henselt's troops are camped here and here, I can only hope that winter is being as harsh for them as for us…"
"I have to admit this whole matter is an insanity, a war in the middle of the winter!" The king walked to the window and stared at the men running around on the patio. "Sadly we have to defend ourselves from that madman."
"Actually, winter is on our side this time," interfered Yennefer, "I believe that the cold and the snow is holding the kaedweni troops back."
"I agree," said Mance as he exchanged a worried look with the sorceress while the king remained at the window, with his back to them. "Also, it is very fortunate that the Pontar did not froze this year… Your Majesty, we are severely outnumbered. King Henselt sent all his troops to the valley."
"And why I'm getting this information only now?"
"Your Majesty, I've sent several reports" – said the Commander, rubbing his beard apprehensively.
"You Majesty also should have gotten this information from the spies…" Yennefer completed. She could see the realization imprinted on the King's face.
"Let us go for a ride. I want to see myself what my spies had been hiding from me," the king ordered. Mance looked at Yennefer and she nodded discretely.
The horses walked with difficulty on the snowed field by the river, blowing mist out of their nostrils. Yennefer scanned the perimeter in case she would hear a foe's thoughts. That activity kept her mind busy enough she could not pay much attention to Commander Mandeville's report.
However, she had sensed that king Demavend was already convinced.
The enchrantress picked an unfamiliar thought wave coming from across the river. He was nervously calculating if his arrow could hit the target, as the Pontar was not particularly wide at that point. Yennefer casted a force field around them just in time to stop the projectile from hitting the king, who looked at her startled.
"How…?"
"We have to leave!" Yennefer growled suddenly feeling the presence of the thoughts of more men across the river.
They galloped away from the river as fast as they could with their struggling horses. Once back in the fortress the king paced back and forth on the hall they had been before.
"So, we are outnumber and they are ready to take down everyone who comes near the river?"
"Exactly, Your Majesty," nodded Mance leaning on the table where many maps were laid. He was obviously tired. "We have managed to protect the commercial convoys, but not much more than that. We need more men…"
"We need to end this madness!" Interrupted the king harshly. "Yennefer, I should have listen to you before. I want to know what that madman wants to stop this insane winter war. Could you arrange that?"
"Of course, Your Majesty."
"Then we will have some unpleasant subjects to address in Vengerberg. I want van Eend and all his spies arrested."
"Do I have permission to go back to Vengerberg?" Mance asked."I'd really like to see my wife and my son, your Majesty."
"Of course Mance, of course."
"Thank you, Your Majesty," the man bowed visibly happy.
"Yennefer, now I have a particular matter I wish you help me. It is a very private matter, I hope I can count with your discretion," the king of Aedirn said when both him and Yennefer were back to the royal council meeting room in Vengerberg.
"Of course, Your Majesty."
"I'll send someone to escort you tomorrow then."
"That woman definitely does not like you," said Geralt amused, referring to Gretta, Yennefer's housekeeper. When the raven-haired sorceress arrived she found Geralt sitting by himself at the kitchen having dinner.
"Nobody likes sorceresses, not even I do," shrugged Yennefer and sat next to him, "I do not care, as long as she is taking good care of the house… talking about that, I'm starving and I could use some wine."
"Your mood seems a lot better today. Did your plan work?"
"Yes, wonderfully," smiled Yennefer delightedly serving herself some of the vegetable stew the housekeeper had left. "I just hope that viper who advises king Henselt has not change her mind. So we can finally reach an agreement and end this stupidity."
"And how are you going to use your time now that you have avoided a war?"
"I still have to take part on the royal council, especially now that the king is getting rid of half of it." Yennefer smiled triumphantly. "And I've had some ideas for an enchantment, I'd like to have some time to work on that also. Maybe I can ask Margarita to send me an apprentice from Aretuza and I could open the shop again."
"You seem much happier now," smiled Geralt handsomely and squeezed her hand softly. Yennefer looked at him and felt genuinely happy. She did not know then her happiness could not last long.
It was already dark when the man sent by Demavend arrived to pick her up. Yennefer clad with a dark cloak that hided her face, followed him across the streets of Vengerberg. She immediately recognized the place they arrived as Mance's house. She quickly understood why the King had sent her there.
"Lady Lisa is waiting for you," said a small woman wearing simple clothes. Yennefer followed her inside the house while the man remained outside. The woman signalized the door and Yennefer entered the room.
"Thank you, Lena. I do not want to be disturbed now," ordered a beautiful brunette wearing a long green silk dress embroidered with black flowers. She waited until the door was closed to talk again. "Lady Yennefer, I'm glad I finally get to meet you, sadly in a very unpleasant circumstance. Oh where are my manners, I'm Lisa Mandeville. I think you probably know my husband from the councils."
"Yes, of course," Yennefer smiled politely. Lisa looked at her in silence for a while as if she was gathering courage. The sorceress did not even bother on reading the woman's mind as her calm aspect quickly fell off and she started to sob.
"Oh Lady Yennefer, you have to help me," cried the brunette woman. "I'm with child, I can feel it…"
Yennefer touched delicately the woman's stomach and could confirm the suspects of the woman were right. She nodded, "not more than three months"
"That is the problem… my husband has been away in Hagge for a long time, I know the baby is not his," cried the king's lover. Yennefer stared at her not sure to how to react to the crying woman.
"And I presume… you do not want the baby?" said the enchantress with cold indifference, hiding perfectly her frustration. She respected the right women had to decide whether to have or not a child, however sometimes she barely could contain her frustration and bitterness regardless these women giving away what she desired the most. She would give everything she had to have a baby of her own.
"I cannot have this baby… I was not born to be a mother," she looked at the crib on the corner of the room where a baby whimpered soundly. "Please, help me. I'll pay anything. I'll give you anything."
"Yes, of course I'll help you," Yennefer said nonchalantly. The intensity of the baby's cries rose and so did Lisa's.
"I cannot even take care properly of my son, I can't have another! He does not stop crying."
Yennefer walked to the crib and examined the baby. The sorceress held the baby against her chest and hummed, balancing him softly, while his mother cried losing her composure in the arm chair. Yennefer suddenly felt enormous disgusts for the other woman. She did not deserve what she had.
The enchantress touched the baby's stomach delicately with her hand and whisper a soothing spell, she could sense that the baby was afflicted by stomach cramps. The baby's cries halted almost immediately and he nestled on her breast.
She caressed softly the baby's cheek, feeling her heart ache. The baby held her finger with his tiny hand and looked at her with his big brown eyes. He looked like a perfect mixture between his parents. She wondered for a second how her baby would look like and quickly scolded herself for her foolishness.
Yennefer put the baby back in the crib and looked at the crying woman. "I'll prepare you a concoction that will… solve your problem. Is that all?"
"Yes, thank you so much. I have nobody else I could ask help and Demavend said I could trust you…" she sobbed and then realized she had said too much. Yennefer nodded and left. She quickly casted a portal as she wanted to be far away as quickly as possible from that house.
She went directly to her bedroom, dumped the cloak somewhere she did not care where and kicked her shoes. Yennefer was a lover of organization and tidiness, maybe that is why Tissaia de Vries had taken her under her wing when Yennefer was a young sorceress. Now, all of that seemed small and frivolous. She took off her dress tossing it by the chair of her dressing table, she threw herself on her bed and finally let go, she cried bitterly at the loss of something she never had.
When Geralt arrived home, Yennefer pretended she was asleep. She was glad he had arrived when she was much calmer, she did not want him to see her cry.
There is nothing more pathetic than a crying sorceress, the voice of Tissaia echoed on her head.
…because is him who will fulfill your deepest desire…
Yennefer woke up again for the fourth time in the same night, she kept dreaming about the hallucination she had many months ago, when she and Geralt were on their way to Vengerberg and ran into a specter.
She turned around in the bed, angry at the hopelessness that was haunting her. She knew that Geralt could not fulfill her deepest desire. The last thing she needed was a dream to keep remind it her that.
The morning came with its white light pushing through the bedroom as Yennefer forgot to close the blinds. She had barely slept during the night.
"Are you alright?" Geralt asked pushing gently the messy black curls aside from her face.
"I'm fine," she lied, "I just want to stay in bed a little longer today."
He nodded and got up, heading to the bathroom.
"The alderman wants to go hunting on the forest today and asked me to join him," said the witcher when he came back smelling like soap, "I'll be back at night."
Geralt kissed her forehead and left.
Yennefer rolled to her back and moved her hands over her flat stomach. If she had managed to capture the Djinn, she would have wished for a child of her own, if she had succeeded she could be in the early stages of the pregnancy, she would be barely showing any signs of her state but she would know. She knew also that she would love her baby so much already.
Before she did not care much who the father could be, she could enchant any man to do the deed and then erase his memory so he would never know. She had planned everything.
But I did not catch the Djinn…
Instead of blaming the witcher for disturbing her when she was dealing with the genie, now she would include him on her wish. If she found a genie again, she would ask to have a beautiful child with Geralt.
Our child would have blue eyes and his nose… hopefully not his stubbornness, Yennefer thought smiling sadly. She liked to imagine that before the mutations Geralt's eyes were blue, it would suit him very well. She had never asked him.
If she found another genie, she would wish that they were regular people without magic and mutations, like Mance and Lisa, except that she would never betray him or be ungrateful of their precious gifts. They would have many children, and afterwards grandchildren and they would grow old, satisfied with what they had accomplished on their short mundane lives. A lone tear rolled across Yennefer's cheek.
Why are you doing this with yourself? She thought digging her nails to the skin of her stomach.
Everything she desired was impossible. Finding other Djinn was impossible; she would have to resign to remain a fool sorceress who fell in love with a reckless witcher. Nothing would come from their relationship, especially not a child.
"What is wrong, Yen?" Asked the witcher when he came back home at night and found the sorceress still laying on the bed.
"Nothing," she mumbled and rolled around, facing away from him, she did not want him to see her like this. He had arrived earlier than she expected.
Yennefer tried to muffle a sob unsuccessfully, she knew that he had hear it clearly.
"Yen, are you crying?" He laid next to her on the bed spooning her. He put his arm around her and kissed softly her shoulder. "What is wrong?"
"I just…" - the sorceress took a deep breath and tried to wipe her tears discretely with the back of her hand. "I just rather have a thousand meetings with obstinate kings than to deal with pregnant women."
Geralt remained in a confuse silence so she continued, feeling that she want him to know her better. She wanted to share her secret with him. He already knew more about her than anyone else, so she told him about her deepest desire.
-"…the only thing I can give her is my love, and I'm afraid now that is not enough. The only thing I can do is love her and nothing else…" she heard him think and immediately felt remorse for revealing her secret, for making him feel like this. She regretted bitterly invading his private thoughts so she decided not to react to them, she just wanted to make this moment go away.
"Yen, look at me," he said suddenly, she obeyed and look deep into his cat-like eyes.
"What you desire… it is not impossible," he whispered very serious, "I'm the evidence of that. My mother was a sorceress, Yen."