Week 1: Discovery

"Is that so...?"

Once more, Roman slapped a contemplative look on his face, his expression shifting to a more serious tone as he glanced at the brat before him. Unlike his gesture earlier, however, he was genuinely considering his options, slowly weighing the benefits of actually going along with this farce.

It went without saying that Torchwick wasn't actually a magician, nor had he really shown any indication of being one, at least not to the kid... but for some reason, the kid was convinced that he was. Not only that, but the kid was even willing to help him without asking any questions, so he should just leave it alone, right?

Of course not. Things were hardly that simple. On one hand, he didn't even know if he could use the kid; No matter how he spun it, Roman was starting from the ground up. Would it really benefit him to pretend like he wasn't? He actually needed to learn the basics, and the last thing the thief wanted was to gloss over something elementary for the sake of appeasing a child's misguided fantasy of helping a proper wizard.

Not to mention that he wasn't sure how much the brat could help with in the first place. He was, what, twelve? How much insight could he really bring? That fact that the kid had published a book was a point for him, sure, but it didn't really tell him if the mage kid was a prodigy, or if this world's academic standards was just terrible. Actually, now that he thought about it, it was probably the latter.

The fact that the kid had somehow mistaken him as a wizard was reason enough to assume that magic users didn't visit, which was enough to tell Roman that the academic community as a whole was probably terrible. Why else would they avoid a place as important as Pensee? Roman had to stop himself from frowning at that thought. He was still pretending to be considering something, after all.

Yes. Pensee. Important.

As deluded as that might sound, Roman could tell that this place was significant. Sure, the town itself was completely inconsequential in the grand scheme of things—the Adventurer's Guild was barely active, and the Merchant's Guild here was a minor branch at best—but all that meant was that the region here had some significance. Why else would Terme Finance bother sending something as rare as a fairy, just to sort out some drunk man's debt?

"Is... Is everything alright, sir?"

Roman's eyes narrowed as he heard the brat's voice, his gaze pulling away from empty air as he settled his focus onto his pile of books. Yeah... If you ignore everything else, then the only thing important enough to be worth exploiting would be those dungeons, right? A smile formed on the thief's face, as he shifted his gaze back to Caillou.

"Of course, don't mind me. In fact, I should thank you." Roman's expression lightened, no longer the piercing frown he had worn prior, as he gave the kid a rueful smile. One tinged with just a bit of truth.

"T-thank me!? Y-you're welcome, sir! But... W-whatever for?" Honestly, the kid's reactions were almost amusing. Part of Roman's mind wanted to say that the brat was like a puppy or something, but that'd be an unfair comparison; the fools in White Fang were never this expressive, nor were they so willing to help. Or maybe that just meant that the White Fang failed as animals as well as terrorists? After all, his new assistant was stumbling over himself trying to hide his childish joy over having contributed in some way, while-

You know what? Never mind. Roman settled his gaze on the kid, giving his best not-business smile.

"Well, if you hadn't approached me, I would've never considered how the dungeons in the area would influence my studies, and that made me think of a great deal of things I hadn't thought of before." That was technically true. And that meant that Roman had all the pieces he required to look genuine. So he gave a genuine word of thanks to the little magician brat. "Really, thank you. With this, I know exactly what my next step is."

"O-oh. In that case, I'm glad I could help!" The green-haired magician honestly looked like a kid in a candy store, which surprised Roman. He didn't think the surly little brat could smile like that, but there you go. Did the kid really react that way to simplistic praise? It's like his parents never thanked him or something... Which would partially explain his aloof attitude during the lecture the other day, as well as his general lack of social skills.

"Erm, I-I mean... be of assistance in your endeavours?" Case in point.

Roman paused, his eyes falling to the kid as he raised an eyebrow. He really hoped that it wasn't the case, but if so... First Recette, now this kid? Does everyone in this world have parental issues? The crook resisted the urge to roll his eyes at this new revelation; perhaps he's just wrong and Caillou just enjoys it when people praise him rather than ignore him. Or maybe he really was another kid who had his father drop a half-million debt on his doorstep. Who knows?

Either way, it didn't matter. Torchwick still had a task he needed to do. So, he softened his expression, a surprisingly easy gesture as he turned to Caillou. "Sure, kid. However you want to say it, you really helped me out. Say, you have any of your old magic study material lying around?"

"Sure?" That caused the kid's expression to change, shifting to one of curious confusion as he stared up at the thief. "I think I have them in storage somewhere, but... Why do you need them?"

Ah, yes, the first problem he'll face. Why did a veteran wizard like him need something as simplistic as a child's homework? Fortunately, his answer was something he had used many times in the past, when recruiting other people for less scrupulous tasks. His slipped into a familiar rhythm as he spoke the words, his motions completely natural as he gave a casual wave of his hand. "You know how it is. Need to see what sort of experience you have, see what I'm dealing with and all that. You don't mind, do you?"

"O-of course not, sir! I'll go get them immediately, mister..." Caillou froze, another amusing sight. Of course the kid didn't know what to call him; Roman never actually introduced himself. Still, he didn't want to embarrass the boy so soon after he had felt some accomplishment, so the thief magnanimously gave the kid an exit.

"Torchwick. Roman Torchwick. Pleased to meet you." Roman smiled, only to falter when he noticed something twitch from the corner of his eye. Did he accidentally wake up one of the sleeping adventurers? A quick glance seemed to confirm that, as he saw the person in the stupidly large cloak stir, but that thought quickly gave way to something more worrying as the kid began swaying nervously.

Why did Caillou suddenly look so much less enthused? "Did you say... R-Roman?"

"Yep." The thief let his hand fall to his side, turning his body to fully face the brat, staring down once again. It didn't take a genius to notice that the kid recognized his name, which only brought up a plethora of questions. Questions that he was certain he wouldn't like the answers to. "Is there a problem?"

"As in..."

There was a tentative pause, as Caillou nervously glanced about the library, fidgeting with his staff for a few short moments, only to look back up at the thief. If there was any doubt that the brat was something other than a nervous, easily spooked child, it was now dispelled. He genuinely looked afraid, and Roman honestly couldn't understand why. Which wasn't good. The thief shifted his posture, changing his balance a bit, a completely innocuous gesture that gave him a far better position to use his weapon as he rested against his cane.

"... the Roman of 'Recettear, and Roman Too?'"

THUNK.

He was no longer resting against his cane. Really, he wasn't resting against anything but the floor at this point, and Roman couldn't tell whether his newly acquired headache was worse than his newly acquired ... headache. At least it didn't hurt too much when he fell over in disbelief. Why the hell does the kid know that name? He wanted to shout it, but it wasn't professional to swear at children, so Roman could only hope that his questioning gaze was enough to convey his unspoken words. Or his annoyance. Preferably both.

"I-I-I..." It certainly did something, as the kid seemed to immediately go into some sort of panic, frantically looking around as he clutched his staff. The outburst only lasted for a few short seconds, however, as Caillou made the perfect transition from nervous wreck to nervous, apologetic wreck. "I'm sorry!"

Which explained absolutely nothing. A fact that Roman made abundantly clear as he rose to his feet again, brushing off his suit before sending the kid a deadpan stare. "What are you even talking ab-"

"I'm sorry! I didn't mean to disrespect your establishment! But it wasn't really my fault either! I didn't think the child you had working at the cashier was telling the truth when she said she was actually working their, and I didn't think that she was telling the truth when she said that she actually owned it with a person named Roman and I thought it was all just an excuse of a joke of a lie and I didn't realize that you were actually real and an arcane researcher for a super important company and I'm so sorry I'll just leave you alone now sorry bye!"

He... what... huh?

Roman blinked, trying to process what the kid had said. It was a bit difficult, since Caillou had literally spewed out that line of nonsense over the span of two seconds, which in itself made no sense. By the time the thief actually deciphered what had been said, the kid had long since ran off, leaving nothing but a cloud of dust and shame in his wake. And a few collapsed bookshelves, too.

At least he wasn't the only one left confused. That sudden outburst had woken up the rest of these lazy adventurers, bleary eyed and mindless as they tried to make sense of what had just happened.

The criminal, for his part, simply chose to accept it. It... was odd, to be sure, but it wasn't the weirdest thing he had experienced this week. So, rather than dwell on it any further, Roman chose to return to his seat, settling himself down as he cracked open his first book. Just to see if he could actually learn something magic-related today.

"Of course, the answer was no." Roman sighed as he stepped out of the Adventurer's Guild.

Surprising absolutely no one, the textbooks there were almost completely useless. For some reason, the regulatory body in charge of this world's education systems didn't believe in documentation or standards, so the few books of magic he had actually managed to pick up were useless pieces of flowery drivel. Just as useless were the books on adventurer abilities, as they went into great lengths of describing the 'what', while choosing to ignore the 'how' and 'why' behind the phenomenon.

Honestly, the most useful books he had were the ones penned by the still-absent brat. The dungeon studies books, at the very least, had a damned table of contents, and spent far more time on useful observations than it did on pointless conjecture. And the mini-encyclopedia on local herbs was actually pretty useful, if he ever decided to go into another line of work. But yeah, he was now more of an expert on the local dungeons' environments and random flowers than he was a beginner on magic. Magic that, he reminded himself, children could somehow use.

In the end, Roman still had managed to leave with five useful books. The librarian at the front desk, the one that replaced the brat from earlier, had suggested a few more advanced books for him to read over. As in, really advanced. Did he really look like someone who could use those? He took them all the same, of course, since he needed whatever resources he could get.

Not only that, but Roman had spent the entire day at the library; The last thing he wanted to do was return empty handed. He needed some excuse to explain why he had ditched that stupid store and the-

"Ooh! Hey! It's Roman! Hey Roman!"

Well, speak of the devil. The classy criminal let out an exhausted sigh as he slipped his book back into his pouch, before turning to the source of the voice. There was absolutely no mistaking who it was, and the man prepared himself as he turned to face the fast-approaching ball of sugar. "Hello brat. Shouldn't you be minding the shop?"

That stopped the girl in her tracks. Well, that and the fact that a few more steps would've meant she'd hit the wall, but Roman was fairly certain that that didn't really factor into the girl's actions. Recette, for the most part, ignored the stonework entirely, as she threw a nervous glance up to him.

"Y-Yeah..." And a nervous chuckle. Did he really want to know where this was going? Upon further inspection, Roman had noticed that the girl was alone, wandering the streets as she carried a burgeoning leather bag and... was that a can of mace? They sell that? "But Tear said that I should probably go find you."

That struck Roman as weird. He sincerely doubted that the fairy let the brat wander unless something very important came up. Maybe she was finally starting to do whatever it was she had been sent to do? That was the only logical thing he cou-

"I dunno why, though! I was teaching Ruby how to work the shop and everything!"

Welp.

He still stood by his statement, because the thought of Recette somehow teaching Red anything would not be logical in any way, shape, or form. Still, Roman had to hold back the urge to strike something, and willed himself to calm down. It only took a few seconds this time, far better than before, but considering how much practice he's been getting lately, the crook wasn't actually sure if that was a good thing or not.

"Alright. Well, I suppose I'll have to thank Tear later."

It was a rare admission, and one that Roman only partially regretted speaking. Still, the fairy did divert a crisis, so there was no harm in mentioning it, even in the presence of someone like Recette. So, as he pocketed his books and took out his cane, Roman waited for the kid's inevitable cheer or shout or whathaveyou.

"...Bwuh?"

Okay, that's just insulting. Was the idea of him being civil really that foreign of a concept? He had been on his best behaviour for the entire week so far! He threw a curious glance at the kid, eyebrow raised as he shook his head. "What do you mean 'Bwuh'?"

"It's just... You've never called Tear by her name before! It's a momeno-... Momenti-... A big occasion!"

Part of him wasn't sure whether to feel insulted or just confused, but that was a small part of his being. The rest of him just wanted to drop this entire act and walk away, or for the brat to suddenly go away. Of course, that wasn't going to happen, since that'd be enough for him to break his contract.

A contract that was, for all intents and purposes, growing obsolete. Roman narrowed his eyes, ignoring the rest of the blathering that came from Recette's mouth.

Besides Melodious Cudgel, the Terme Finance company didn't actually have anything to lord over his head. And sure, it would be really nice if he actually got that back, but he was still certain that those idiots wouldn't know the first thing about his cane, let alone the dust within. Even if they did, they'd probably blow themselves up, solving his biggest problem all by themselves.

That'd just leave him with studying this place's magic, absorbing whatever power the dungeon held, then finding a way back to Remnant to... To...

Roman frowned. To what? Rebuild his empire? The fact that Cinder had pulled it all out from under his feet wasn't lost on him, and with the effort he'd have spend on rebuilding new contracts, he didn't really have a reason to stay in Vale. And that's just assuming Cinder hadn't already gone through with the plan while he had been incarcerated. Surely they would've heard of his disappearance by now, and adjusted.

The biggest question on his mind was whether or not Neo was okay. Sure, she was a strong girl, and if his memory wasn't lying to him, it's only been a week since his incarceration. Still... A lot could happen in a week. Who knows if Cinder had some other annoying plan tucked away, ready to burn more things for her plan of whatever.

Yeah, no.

The more he thought about it, the more he realized that he simply didn't have the time to play babysitter... Even if it was to someone like Recette. Sure, the kid's sob story was great and all, but it wasn't like he could afford to care for every little person under the sun. If he did something as foolish as that, he'd run himself ragged and grey. Assuming he didn't get backstabbed first. Or just wither and die from the stress of it all. Or who knows what else.

But that's life, isn't it? Remnant, at the very least... Which was why he had to take advantage of what little time he had away from that damned place, and make sure he was ready to kick life's face in when he got back. Because, even if he couldn't care for everyone, he could still do something.

Right?

"...Roman? Are you okay?"

Oops. Right, the brat was still here. Rolling his eyes, the thief fixed his posture, stretching himself out a bit as he turned to face the kid proper. "Of course I am, Recette. Why wouldn't I be?"

"Well... You look hurt." The girl's voice was quiet as she turned to face him, her usual smile completely absent as she stared back up at him. She almost strained to look him in the eyes, and the thief was reminded of how tiny the girl really was. Huh. Kids do pull off the best sad-puppy expressions. "A-and you just used my name, rather than brat or kid or or..."

Especially when they're genuine. He might as well try to calm her down. "Look kid, I'm fine. All I did today was go to the library. And if you're talking about my cane, you know that I just keep it for show."

"Not that!" Recette was louder this time, more conviction in her tone as she continued looking at him. "Not like... ouchie hurt, but... The same hurt that Tear gets whenever she thinks I'm asleep. She never says anything about it, and I don't know if she knows if I know. Or if she does know that I know, but doesn't know that I know that she knows! Or-"

With one swift motion, Roman planted his hand on Recette's hair, ruffling her scatterbrained head.

"Blargh!" Recette squeaked. He wasn't sure how she had managed to go from a line of confused, worried words to something that couldn't be squeaked, but she had squeaked it. Which was far better than whatever it was she was ranting about earlier.

What?

He had to put a stop to that. It was getting outrageous! And besides, he was certain that he had kept his composure, so she couldn't actually have seen anything, right? Not that there was even anything to see, since he was just plotting as usual! So, in conclusion, the kid was suffering some sort of diabetic stroke, and was seeing things that weren't there, which meant that he had to intervene. Really, he was just being a good citizen.

And as a good citizen, he had to clarify this before it went out of hand.

"Alright, alright. Listen up, brat." Roman pulled his hand away, closing his eyes dismissively as he began explaining what had actually occurred. Not that weird misconception that the twelve-year-old deluded sugar-vaccuum thought she had seen. "First things first: what you saw wasn't me hurting. At least, not meaningfully. I just tried one of those stupid Walnut breads that you enjoy eating so much, and the taste didn't agree with me."

He didn't even need to look at her to see that she wasn't convinced, but that didn't matter. He was out one walnut bread, courtesy of that Louie kid, which meant that she couldn't prove otherwise.

"Second of all, I used your name because I am contractually obliged to acknowledge you once a day." Roman spoke that with a straight face, nodding mostly to himself as his voice continued. See, the funny part is, that actually wasn't a lie. His contract did say that he had to formally acknowledge Recette as the debtor for this job, and that he was supposed to assist Tear's efforts with retrieving the debt. So, obviously, referring to her by name counts as formally acknowledging her. "You can even ask Tear about that."

"Does the contract thingy also say you need to call Tear by her name?"

"Sure, whatever". Leave it to Recette to interrupt when he's explaining things. And he was most definitely explaining things, not excusing them away, so don't you get any ideas!

Actually, speaking of ideas... that last bit that the kid mentioned could be useful. He had never seen the fairy brood before, so if what Recette said was accurate, the fairy might be experiencing some turmoil or stress. If it gets worse, he could use it to his advantage... Maybe slip some things from the shop, or sneak out without her throwing as annoying of a fit.

Yeah. You know what? That's not a bad idea. At the very least, more information isn't necessarily a bad thing. Nodding to himself, the crook turned back to face Recette. Heck, he didn't even need to come up with a terrible excuse, either. He could just continue using his cover of being an employee for now.

"Most importantly... If you ever see Tear like that again, I want you to let me know, okay?" Roman put on the most sincere expression he could muster, forcing himself not to retch as he gave the kid a look of worry. "I may not act it, but Tear's still an... associate of mine, so I need to know if she's getting stressed. Can you do that for me, kid?"

He stared Recette for a few more moments, his face slowly shifting from false worry to actual worry. Was the kid okay? She wasn't doing anything except staring at him, her pout slowly shifting to, if he's perfectly honest, an unnervingly wide grin. Silence hung in the air for a few moments longer, before Recette shattered it in perfect, childish form.

"Yayifications! You really do care!"

Face, meet palm. Was this misunderstanding really better than the last? He just... didn't care anymore.

"Sure, whatever. Let's just head back to the shop, alright? Need to drop off these books and report back before Red kills Thumbelina or something."

Thankfully, that was enough to get Recette to stop, and her previous expression of dopey joy changed into one of misguided worry.

"Wait... What!?"