A/N: I almost didn't complete this chapter in time ... QAQ But I'm so glad I did!
Jean violently shook his head. Nuh-uh. No way he was doing this.
"Come on, Jean! Don't be such a wet blanket!" Eren rolled his eyes.
"No one cares if you have a horrific voice!" Connie added, laughing.
Historia smiled patiently. "Besides, everybody's doing it!"
"Look," Jean spoke irritably. "The rules says everyone has to participate. And I am! I'm doing the props remember?"
Armin groaned. "There are no props needed for carolling!"
"I don't want to do it, okay?"
Glowering, Armin gestured for everyone to start packing and getting ready. The soldiers would have to depart Headquarters by 5 and it was already 4. Hopefully everyone can freshen up too before they leave.
And what is it with Jean and singing anyway? Armin just couldn't comprehend how someone could be that obstinate about something. It's not like it's life-threatening.
At first, he had thought Jean just doesn't know the lyrics and is thus uncomfortable with singing along. However, after a few hours of rehearsing, Armin noticed his mouth was moving, but still hasn't sang a note.
"You're not even trying," said Armin flatly after approaching Jean.
Jean's face darkened as he crossed his arms. "I'm not in the mood."
"You're never in the mood!"
"I'm sorry, Armin. Singing's just not my thing okay?" Jean said tiredly. He wished everybody would just get off his back already. Hasn't he made his point clear enough?
"At least I'm mouthing along …"
Armin crossed his arms, he seemed to be pouting a little which Jean found oddly … charming.
"It's not good enough. Everyone should be able to partake in Christmas cheer …" There was a pause. Armin's tone suddenly became warning, "I'm not giving back your jacket until you sing."
Jean laughed. "My jacket? The one you borrowed? You returned it me late last night, remember?"
Jogging his memory, Armin did recall catching Jean outside his dorm and returning his jacket. It must have slipped his mind seeing as there was a lot going on … Armin scowled. His threat had been rendered ineffective.
"How's your injury though?" Jean asked suddenly.
Armin hunched up his shoulders nervously, remembering how Jean had tended to it that night. "Uhh … it - it's healing - W, wait! Don't change the subject!"
Jean looked away quickly, refusing to meet Armin's angry gaze. He decided to stay silent.
"Fine! Don't sing then!"
Frustrated, Armin marched off.
Despite still being annoyed, Jean allowed a little smile curling at the corners of his lips. Seeing a usually calm person at their wits' end was entertaining. Then, he realised that the thought was actually really disturbing and shook his head quickly.
Sighing again, he headed off to pack. Perhaps he should consider seeing a psychiatrist.
The soldiers promptly headed off to Karanes District at 5. Once again, they had cleared out all the Titans in the area in the morning but they still rode in formation, looking out for any danger. The strategy was to avoid and not engage.
Jean couldn't see Armin riding amongst the soldiers but he was sure he's still upset about his unwillingness to sing.
He felt a little bad but was still resolute in his decision not to. At least he's mouthing the words along. No one can really tell there's one person not singing. But Armin was just so darn insistent on everybody participating in the Christmas cheer. It was … a little annoying. Christmas has always been too much of a bother and Jean only hoped everyone will respect his decision for once.
By 6, the soldiers had reached the orphanage successfully. Although they did see a few Titans on the way, all of them were far into the distance and never approached the Survey Corps. So fortunately for all of them, they had arrived unscathed.
The performance was to be held in the dining hall where the tables have also been cleared to make a pseudo stage area. The children, ages 3 to 12, sat on the floor, eagerly waiting.
Backstage, which was the kitchens, the soldiers, dressed in their costumes, stood ready. Jean and Historia made their rounds around them to fix last-minute adjustments and check that everything was in place.
Finally, it was time for the show to start. Wheeling out the backdrop with Historia, Jean set it down in place as the children clapped.
Following that, the actors hurried up to take their places.
Jean and Historia met Armin in the kitchen just as the soldiers started the play. Jean noticed Armin was a little white.
"Armin," he sighed. "Relax. They're going to be fine."
The other boy nodded, but didn't remove his eyes from the crack in the door as he watched the play. He continued to perspire profusely. So far so good.
"Godfather, did you bring me a gift?" Sasha asked sweetly.
"Sure, I did … ta-dah!" Eren exclaimed, and with a flourish, produced the Nutcracker toy from behind his cape.
The children clapped in glee.
Armin allowed himself a small smile. The roles fit everyone perfectly. Perhaps he really did have nothing to fear. Turning his head around and catching Jean's eye, he gave a thumbs up.
Historia who was watching the play beside Armin, giggled. "Want to watch them too?"
"I can hear them," Jean replied. "So it's okay."
"Wouldn't it be more -"
"Shhhh!" Armin whipped around to glare at them.
Jean smiled nervously and muttered an apology. Historia pouted. Then, she went over to tap Armin on the shoulder to excuse herself to the bathroom.
"Now?" Armin wasn't keen on letting her. "But the act's almost over. We need your help with their costume changes."
And as soon as he had said that, he heard loud clapping and the soldiers walking towards the door. He jumped back just in time, pulling Historia out of the way too, as the door flung open.
Armin winced a little, sudden movements like that don't agree with the burn on his stomach.
The soldiers started to cheer inside the kitchen and Armin hushed them.
"Change and prepare for Act 2 please! You all have 5 minutes!"
The soldiers dispersed quickly as Jean and Historia handed out their costumes. Armin kept watch on the time. 2 minutes left …
1 minute …
The soldiers returned, most of them as mice, Connie as the Nutcracker Prince and Mikasa as the Mouse King. Armin ushered all of them out of the kitchen for the second act.
He barely heard Historia mutter something as she excused herself to the washroom.
"Who turned on the Christmas tree lights? What's that noise?" Sasha gasped.
Armin nodded. Good, she sounded convincingly scared enough. He watched as the mice came out from behind the tree, led by Mikasa, the Mouse King as the Nutcracker and his own troop of two soldiers stepped onto the stage.
Mikasa silently pointed at the Nutcracker and the mice charged.
"En guarde!" Connie yelled, raising a cardboard musket as they started to do battle.
Armin bit his lip. It was going really well, actually …
Then suddenly, Sasha took off her slipper and threw it at the Mouse King … except that it didn't land on Mikasa. It hit Connie, who was distracted and flailed.
He tripped over someone's foot and fell, crashing into one soldier which crashed into the next.
Armin shrieked silently from behind the crack in the kitchen door. He was watching a domino-effect of disaster happening right in front of him.
Jean rushed over, hearing the commotion outside. "What happened?"
Armin stood aside, giving him space to look through the crack. "I can't watch …" he whispered in a strangled voice.
Jean saw the soldiers falling one by one, finally hitting Sasha who had stood rooted to the ground, wide-eyed with shock. She screamed as she hit the floor too. Finally, Connie struggled to his feet and limped over to Mikasa who had sat up. He swung his musket at her, faking hitting her as she pretended to collapse once more onto the ground.
He then limped over to Sasha, kneeled and took her hand.
"Come, Marie! We were victorious!"
The children cheered.
Jean now jumped aside, pulling Armin with him as the soldiers came into the kitchen. Everyone looked glum and unhappy.
Armin clenched his fists. He had to stay strong and keep everyone's spirits up.
"You guys did a great job!"
Everyone stared at him, unconvinced.
"Hear that?" Armin gestured to the door. "The children are still cheering. You guys did a great job and finished even more spectacularly after that huge fall. Congratulations on managing to complete the second act after such an accident!"
The soldiers smiled and started to look happier. Armin let his tense shoulders relax. He was glad to be able to encourage everyone after what had happened.
Jean suddenly stepped forward, noticing not everyone was smiling. "Wait, but who's injured?"
Several hands were raised.
Armin and Jean quickly went over to see what had happened. Fortunately, these injuries were superficial and would heal with some rest by tomorrow although they may still remain sore from the bruising. The two of them set to work by assigning their roles in the third act to other soldiers who were not involved in it.
"You guys don't have to dance," Armin addressed the soldiers filling in as they had no idea what the dance steps were. "Just stand to the side and clap your hands and make simple movements, alright?"
The soldiers nodded and so Armin sent them all off to change the backdrop and begin Act 3 with all the dancing candy.
Then, Jean caught Armin's shoulder, turning him around.
"Sasha and Connie are injured," he said worriedly.
The two rushed over to where they were seated. The other soldiers with injuries were trying to help them stand.
"Sit down!" Armin waved at them to stop. He approached Sasha and Connie. "Where are you two injured?"
Sasha winced. "I sprained my right leg."
Connie groaned. "I sprained my left."
Armin bit his lip again. There was no way they could go up on stage. He looked around for any soldiers to replace them but the kitchen was empty, save for the injured.
Right. They were all now performing the first part of Act 3.
Historia! An idea struck him.
"Historia?" he peered around the room.
"She went off to the washroom, Armin," Jean reminded him.
Armin vaguely recalled her giving an excuse as she left. There wasn't enough time to go searching for her and brief her all before curtain call. He sank to his knees. The play was done for. He was done for.
"Wait," Sasha started. "You two could play Marie and the Prince!"
Armin looked at her, confused.
"What?!" Jean exclaimed. "I'm not gonna -"
"Shut up, Jean!" Connie interjected excitedly. "It would work! You guys could totally fit into our costumes!"
Armin's mental clocked ticked internally as he mind quickly worked out the situation in his head. Eventually, he leapt to his feet.
"We'll do it!" He told Sasha and Connie.
The two of them cheered as they were helped out of the kitchen to change by the soldiers, leaving a shocked Jean and a determined Armin in the kitchen.
"We have to!" Armin said, facing Jean.
Unconvinced, Jean hardened his jaw. "No."
"Please, Jean?" Then, Armin looked guilty. "I'm sorry. I know I've been … uhhh … pushy these days."
Jean remained silent.
"I shouldn't be forcing you to do things especially with the singing. I just wanted everyone to enjoy themselves … you know?" Armin shuffled his feet from side to side. He had been doing some thinking on the way to the orphanage and was ashamed of his actions. He wondered when he ever got so controlling.
"But looking back," he continued, "I realised I shouldn't force people to enjoy themselves because it just makes matters worse. And I understand you have your own reasons for not wanting to sing, so … I'm sorry."
Jean sighed and ran his fingers through his hair. "I know. And yeah, it was annoying but it's alright now."
"But now, Jean," Armin lifted his head to look at Jean directly. "Now, I really need your help." He grasped at Jean's shirt, taking him aback.
"However," he looked to the side now. "I understand if you don't want to and I will respect your decision."
Jean swallowed. He began to feel flustered and tried to calm himself. He could feel the hands on his shirt shaking a little as they held on tightly. Was Armin's hair always this bright and yellow?
Armin, with his head bowed, waiting for a reply … Jean felt … something. Almost too quickly, he stepped back and took the boy's hand off his shirt.
"Yeah, yeah. I'll do it."
Armin brought both his hands to his mouth as his eyes opened wide with surprise, just as two soldiers hurried in with Sasha and Connie's costumes.
"I'm not going to play Marie," Jean told Armin as he grabbed Connie's clothes.
Armin laughed, taking Sasha's. He already knew that.
As soon as they had just finished changing, the kitchen doors were flung open again. Armin grabbed Jean's hand and dashed out of the door, past the bewildered soldiers who were just entering.
"Is that …" Eren stared, unbelieving.
"Jean and Armin?"
"What's going on?"
"Where's Sasha and Connie?"
Historia hurried into the kitchen from another door. "I just saw Sasha in the washroom, she's injured and I think Connie might be too."
The soldiers all rushed to the crack in the door.
On the other side, Jean and Armin came on stage. Or rather, the area of floor that had been marked out as the stage. The children were silent.
Noticing their surprise, the two realised at the same time they looked nothing like Connie and Sasha!
"Uhhh …" Jean started uneasily. "I hope you like your new hairstyle, Marie."
Armin quickly improvised. "I do. Thanks for bringing me to get it. Yours look really good too!" He looked over to the children and smiled.
The children, now convinced gave the two thumbs-ups.
Then, Armin looked over to the three soldiers sitting at the side of the stage. They were each holding instruments and were in charge of the music. He nodded as discreetly as he could for them to begin playing.
Fingers ran across the strings creating a harmony of sounds.
Armin took Jean's hand and placed it on his waist. Taking his cue, Jean lifted Armin's right hand in his left.
Suddenly feeling shy, Armin cast his eyes downwards to the ground. He couldn't believe this was actually happening.
Jean, feeling Armin freeze, stiffened up too. But he realised everyone was watching them as the musicians continuously played in confusion.
"Relax," he whispered in Armin's ear as he forced himself to take a step forward, moving the other boy along with him.
Forcing himself to breathe, Jean tried his best to keep in time with the music as he did a basic waltz series of steps. He wished he had paid more attention to Sasha and Connie's dancing when he was stepping in for Armin yesterday. What else did they do again?
Oh. He remembered Sasha twirling. Jean let go of Armin's waist (which was way too slender for his comfort), and twirled him around. Armin gasped in surprise as he spun.
Suddenly, his knees buckled as he hunched over in pain. It was his injury. Jean swiftly caught Armin and steadied him.
"I got you," he whispered. "You okay?"
Armin nodded, panting though he wasn't out of breath. Speaking of which, feeling Jean's breath on his neck as he whispered in his ear was giving him goosebumps. However, it also did calm him down and Armin decided to focus on his steady breathing and matching his steps to Jean's.
Subconsciously, Armin started to feel more comfortable with the waltzing and allowed himself to be led. The steps became bigger and more free. Their bodies loose and expressive. The children's eyes were on them and probably, so were the soldiers' from behind the kitchen door.
But Armin and Jean have started to stop caring. They were genuinely enjoying themselves. Armin raised his head to look at Jean. Realising Jean had been staring down at him rather intensely, Armin looked away …
Almost coyly, Jean thought. It gave him goosebumps for inexplicable reasons.
Finally, the delicate tune they had been waltzing to came to an end. Jean and Armin stopped moving though they felt like everything around them was still spinning out of control.
Face flushed and panting hard, the stepped away to face the audience. With Jean's left hand still holding Armin's right, the pair bowed, and bowed again to the fervent applause.
Then, they exited the stage and headed towards the kitchen. Realising he was still holding Armin's hand, Jean quickly let go before they headed in.
The soldiers clapped and thumped the both of them on the back. There was some whistling to which Jean shot a dirty look towards.
"Shut up!" Jean said gruffly. "No one say anything!"
"We have to," Armin said in between breaths, "prepare for Act 4."
The soldiers headed out for their last act after a flurry of changing and preparation. Since Sasha was wounded, Armin went on for Act 4 in her place as well.
"It's just … I had a really beautiful dream," Armin said breathlessly.
"And sometimes, dreams come true, dear." Eren, as the magician, said in reply.
Thankfully Act 4 was the shortest act and soon, the soldiers were done with the play. The children leapt to their feet and clapped enthusiastically, cheering as loud as they could as the whole cast came up to bow. Armin's chest welled up with pride as he saw Erwin Smith, seated at the back of the room, giving him a nod of approval.
Buoyed by the success of the play, the soldiers remained on stage, excitedly waiting to begin their next performance.
Armin who had entered the kitchen, came out again carrying a gramophone and a brown paper envelope. He set it on the floor and took the record from the envelope to place it on the gramophone.
Chimes began to ring and lilting flutes began to play. The soldiers started to belt out the lyrics.
"Oh the weather outside is frightful, but the fire is so delightful …"
The children, still on their feet, held hands and began to join the soldiers.
Armin, too, was having so much fun that time passed quickly and soon they were on their third and last song. He felt Eren on his left, sliding an arm around his shoulder and noticed everyone doing the same. He beamed at his best friend and Eren grinned back at him.
The soldiers began to sway slowly, left to right, in time with the music.
"Have yourself a merry little Christmas …" The soldiers sang with feeling.
"Let your heart be light …"
Armin gasped. He had heard a new voice. Could it be …?
He turned his head slightly to see Jean behind him smiling happily and softly singing along. It was barely audible but …
Jean caught Armin's eye and grinned awkwardly. "What?" He whispered.
Armin giggled and turned back to the front. "Nothing," he whispered to himself.
"Hmm?" Eren looked at Armin who shook his head and continued singing, grinning from ear to ear.
It was already 8 when the soldiers had changed into their regular uniforms and were about to set off for Headquarters. Jean was glad the performance was exactly an hour long. It was within the time limit, and thanks to that, everybody could leave on time. Armin's superb planning skills were definitely under-appreciated.
When the soldiers got to the door as they were about to leave, some children stopped them however and gave them handwritten cards to thank them.
"They made it themselves after your wonderful performance," said the elderly man in charge of the orphanage.
"They were absolutely delighted. Thank you for bringing such joy to the children," his elderly wife beside him shook Erwin's hand.
"It was our pleasure."
When Jean returned to his dorm later that night, he was absolutely exhausted. The charity performance was a huge success and Erwin had made it very clear during the debrief that he was proud of what they had all accomplished today. It was unusual for him to do so, but Jean felt a sense of pride. It was a good feeling.
Then, he just remembered how a little girl had given him a card just before they left.
Taking care not to wake the rest of his sleeping dorm-mates, Jean reached under his bed for his trunk where he had stored the card before going to shower.
Fortunately, a beam of moonlight had fallen across his bed, and under it, Jean was able to read what was written.
"Thank you for the show. I was so very, very, happy watching the Nutcracker for the first time. The background was pretty and I also liked the Christmas songs! Love, Ana."
Jean closed the card gently as a pool of emotions began to well up inside of him. He lay on his bed, clutching the card to his chest. For the first time in years, Jean felt the warm, fuzzy feeling in his heart, that Christmas brings. He never realised how much he had missed such a feeling until tonight.
A/N: I smell Christmas cheer (for Jean, finally) ... and Jearmin.