Daria

Sunday, October 9th, 1983. 6:39 pm

I hear a loud rapping sound on the door. I don't care about it, and I'm showing it by turning my back to the wall. I'm grounded. Why should I care?

"Daria?" I jerk. Why does that voice seem so familiar? Slowly, I turn my head around, but then I turn it back to the wall again. I don't want to know who it is.

I can hear the door slowly open behind me, and quiet footsteps follow it. Soon, the door closes again, and all of a sudden, someone is sitting next to me on the bed. I turn my head to see who it is.

He has the same sparkly blue eyes Dad does, and the brown hair. It's much shorter, and his cheeks are covered with red kiss stains. He's wearing ripped jeans, and he has a huge smile on his face. I know that smile. It belongs to my brother Nico.

I throw my arms around his neck and start sobbing. It's the second time I cried today, and this time, I feel happy. These tears are tears of joy. Nico is back, and he's staying for the night. It's so thrilling to have him here. I haven't seen him in forever.

"Hey, sis. I'm glad you're happy." He pulls away to smile at me. I punch him in the shoulder. I'm good at punching people. Once, Marco and I got into a fist fight (long story), and I won by punching him in the face so hard, he got a nose bleed. I did get into deep shit with Dad though, but it was worth it. I do wish I did a bit more, like break his collarbone, but I wouldn't have gone much further than that.

"I missed fighting with you!" I shout at the top of my lungs. "I'm so happy right now! I get to fight with you again."

I hear a loud chuckle from the doorway as Nico ruffles my hair. God, his fingers are so rough and gnarly. But then again, he's studying to get a degree in mechanics. Yeah, he's doing the same thing Dad does.

"You're already fighting with him?" Dad is leaning against the wall, and he has this huge smile on his face. Why does he have to be so cheesy? "How's college, Nico?" he asks, turning away from me as I grab a pillow and hurl it at him. He'll be pissed with me for that, but who gives a fuck.

"It's really stressful," Nico says. He's not smiling anymore. "It doesn't help that Anna was dating another guy behind my back."

Dad raises his eyebrows. Anna is Nico's girlfriend. They've been dating since Grade 11. To be honest, I never liked Anna that much. "Tell me about it," he says, gesturing Nico over. He points to me and gives a death stare. Hoo boy. I'm in deep shit again for the second time today.

"Nico's telling you about what?" A woman with jet black hair and a lacy dark crop top stands next to Dad. As she speaks, she drums her fingers against the wooden doorframe. She has a huge smile plastered on her face.

"Nirvana!" I shout. I love Nirvana. She's a banging woman. I really hope Dad marries her sometime or another. I'd like to have her as my stepmother.

"Hey kid," she says, looking at me. She turns her attention to Nico. "How's it going, Nico? You're gonna tell your dad 'bout college?"

"Guess so," Nico says, getting up from the bed. He nods at me, which is a sign meaning he'll come and see me again tonight. "See ya later, Dars."

I watch him walk up to Dad and take the pillow from him. He tosses it back to me and I catch it. Dad puts his hand on Nico's shoulder and leads him away, speaking in Arabic. Nirvana comes in as soon as they disappear from view and closes the door.

"I heard you got into trouble again," she says, sitting next to me. Like me, she's sitting cross-legged.

"Yeah," I mutter. "So much for a good comeback."

"Tell me about it." Nirvana leans in closer and looks at me attentively.

I tell her about my day, starting from hanging out with Aly to that argument with Randall, and Dad's punishment. While I'm talking, Nirvana just listens and doesn't interrupt. This is what I like about Nirvana. She listens to what I say, and gives me really good advice about stuff whenever Aly's advice doesn't help at all.

"Your dad has a good point," she says, when I'm done. "You might have told a suicidal boy to kill himself. How would you feel if he actually killed himself?"

"I didn't actually mean it," I protest. Randall may be a butt ugly dickweed, but I wouldn't want him to actually kill himself.

"I know, but what if he actually did it?"

For a moment, I feel a little guilty. "I'd feel really bad," I say.

"How would you sleep at night?" Nirvana asks, leaning even closer. "You would just stay up thinking about it all night long. You wouldn't be able to stand facing people that boy was close with. It would haunt you for the rest of your life."

I feel even more guilty. I really wish I could take back what I said.

"Just think about it, kid." She gets off the bed and goes to the doorway. "I'll see you at dinner."

"I'll see you, too," I say, looking down as she leaves the room.

What would happen if Randall killed himself? What would happen?

I'm not updating next Saturday because I'll be on a field trip to British Columbia, and there's no Internet access.