Kara woke up in a room that smelled like medicine and had metallic, silvery-grey walls with a headache and a dry mouth. "Ugh," she announced after a moment's thought.
"General Saje."
Kara turned her head to find Lieutenant Screech approaching. "What happened?" She asked.
Screech pressed his lips together for a long moment, "You passed out in the hall outside medical after Corporal Bones gave you a painkiller."
"Was I snoring?" Kara asked as she began to sit up, hissing as her arm began to throb with pain.
"What? Sir, I need you to stay lying down for a moment," Screech said.
"No problem," Kara said as she lay back, "And was I snoring in the hallway? Because depending on the type of painkiller used, I either end up acting like a hallucinating drunk or sleeping. I snore when I'm drugged."
"You were snoring." Bones announced.
"Well, thank you for getting me onto a bed," Kara said. "Whatever that was, it hit a lot harder than I'm used to."
"So noted," Screech said as he reached for Kara's arm. "You didn't damage your arm when you went down, at least."
"So it's still a bone bruised elbow and a dislocated wrist?" Kara asked.
"Yes sir," Screech said.
"Then can I get a drink?" Kara asked.
"Of course, sir," Screech said as he helped her sit up and Bones went to get some water.
Kara stayed in medical long enough to finish her drink and then slipped out before either of the medics could stop her. Careful of her banged up arm, Kara headed down to her quarters to change into something warmer and more comfortable than her armored pants and silk shirt. She'd have to track her vest down later.
Waiting for her at the door to her room was General Secura.
"General?" Kara said, stopping short.
Aayla Secura smiled, "General Saje, I was hoping for a few words, but they said you'd been in medical."
Kara nodded, "Yes, I, uh, well, I reacted to the painkiller, fell asleep before I could get back here. Apparently punching a droid with my bare hand wasn't the best idea."
"It worked, didn't it?" Secura said.
Kara chuckled as she nodded, "Yeah, but I don't see me doing it again." She gestured to her room, "There's not a lot of space, but would you care to come in? I was hoping to change."
"Of course," Secura said. "Do you need help?"
Kara hesitated as she opened the door, then glanced at Secura, "I wouldn't say no, General."
"Aayla," Secura said, "I get called General enough by my own men."
"Kara," Kara said with a smile as she stepped into her room. "Honestly, I'm glad you're here. My arm," she gestured, "I'd probably end up looking ridiculous if I tried this on my own."
"All right," Secura said, "while we're doing this, I'd like to hear what you've heard at the Temple. Rumors are one thing, but facts."
"I'll tell you what I know," Kara agreed.
With gentle hands Secura helped Kara change out her clothes for more traditional Jedi garb before Kara settled down on the bed. "This armor is nice," Secura said.
"My father gave it to me," Kara admitted. "A Knighting gift. They make it on Ilan."
Secura nodded, "How is your father?"
"I don't know," Kara said. "I didn't actually see him at my Knighting, he was on a mission. We don't see each other often, and I'm pretty sure if it was just up to Father, I'd never have met him at all."
"Oh?" Secura asked.
Kara smiled, "I had a vision. I'm going to rescue him from captivity, but to get him to trust me, I had to know something about my mother. I was nine, I got out of class and tracked him down. I don't think he expected me."
"No," Secura agreed, "I've worked with Master Saje, he's very fond of order and routine."
"He's Ilandrian," Kara said. "I was raised in the crèche, but I know Ilan is all about tradition, ritual, and ceremony." She shrugged, "I respect that he doesn't want a close relationship, so I never try, but then he turns around and gives me armor as a Knighting gift, or a blaster for my name day after I started using one regularly."
Secura patted her knee, "Well, you can no more control Master Saje than he can control you."
"I wish he'd just talk to me," Kara admitted, "I'm confused. It's like every time I've accepted how he acts, something new happens and I'm again left struggling with my feelings about him. I just want him to be consistent, not confusing." She stopped, "I'm sorry, I'm sure that wasn't what you expected when you asked."
"But you needed to say it," Secura said. She stood, "We'll be arriving at the rendezvous soon. I should check on my men."
Kara nodded, then stood, "Aayla?"
"Yes Kara?" Secura asked.
"May I ask, how do your troops remember the victorious dead?" Kara asked.
Secura hesitated, "I'm not sure. We have a moment of silence, but I've let them find their own peace."
"Oh, okay," Kara said. "Thank you."
"It is I who thank you," Secura said, "If being a listening ear is what you need, then I was happy to listen to you."
Kara followed the other Jedi into the hallway, watching her walk away.
"General?"
Kara turned to find Chip with her vest, "Chip, thank you." She reached out.
"Is everything okay sir?" Chip asked, passing her the vest.
Kara glanced over her shoulder at Secura, "I think I want to be her when I grow up."
"Sir?" Chip asked.
"Nothing," Kara said. She tossed her vest back into her room. "Chip, collect your squad and bring them to the conference room on this level. I'll meet you there."
"Yes sir," Chip said.
After arranging for a tray of caff to be brought to the conference room, Kara collected a wooden box from her quarters and went to join her squad. She could feel the nervousness coming from the men well before she reached the door and she hoped that she wasn't going to mess anything up. She hesitated outside of the door's sensor range to take a deep breath and walked inside.
"Relax, nobody's in trouble," Kara announced as she walked in. "At ease," she added when they all stood up. "I have few questions for you." She put the box down and sat at the table, tucking her hands in her lap.
"Sir?" Blaze said.
"Firstly, I want to know if you all are willing to remain on this squad," Kara said. "I know we don't have a full company, but if any of you feel that working up close with me makes you uncomfortable, I'd rather give you the option now. You don't have to answer me now, but I'd prefer it before we have another mission."
Chip raised his hand, "Sir, I'm staying."
"All right," Kara agreed, "we'll negotiate on the jetpacks though."
"If you'll have me, I'm staying," Blaze said. "Someone needs to keep these jokers in line."
Kara smiled at him, "Thank you, Sergeant." She opened her box and began to unpack it, "Now, regardless of how you decide, I invite you to join me in a small ceremony called Salute the Victorious Dead." She stood, look at each of them, "Twelve of us rode out today, on steeds made metal and death, but eleven returned." She set out each shot gas and began to carefully pour from the bottle she'd taken from the box. Then she turned to her men, "Will you join me?"
They all stood, saying in unison, "Yes ma'am."
Kara sent the two shots to each man, then lifted the first of her own. "We drink today for Shy, warrior of the Republic, fallen in battle beside us. First, we drink for the grief of knowing." She braced herself and took the shot, flinching slightly at the bitter flavor. Then she hid her smirk behind her glass as the men reacted to the drink with sounds of disgust. Finally, she whistled sharply, "Once more, if you'll trust me. A second drink, for the grief of memory." She lifted her second drink and watched. Only Chip dared lift his shot even as he was grimacing. They saluted each other and knocked their drinks back.
The second shot was a mellowing influence, taming the horrid bitterness of the first drink.
"Take the shot," Chip said suddenly, turning to Hopper, "trust me brother, and take the shot."
Hopper glared at him, "Why would I do that?"
"Just take it," Chip said.
"All right," Blaze said, and took his second shot. After a moment, he blinked and raised his eyebrows. Then he turned to the squad, "He's right, take the shot."
Slowly, in ones and twos, the others took the second shot. Kara smiled as she packed away the bottle and took out the cloth and spray to begin cleaning her shot glasses.
"Pardon me sir, but what was that?" Fallback demanded.
"Tethes," Kara said, "It's an Ilandrian drink traditionally served only at wakes, although I'm told there are some who consider it a fine after dinner drink." She sat down and took up the task of cleaning the glasses. "Now, the second half of the tradition is to share stories about our fallen. If you are so inclined to do so, I would like to know more about him."
There was silence, save for Kara's careful cleaning, then Hopper cleared his throat, "Don't suppose any of you ever heard why we call him Shy?"
"No," Rusty said. "Always wondered though, he was downright friendly for a brother."
Hopper chuckled, "Well, it goes back to early training. You know how the instructors would give us broken equipment mixed with good? Shy was the guy who could pick out the broken blasters every time." He tapped his fingers for a minute, "After a few weeks of broken and exploding blasters, Shy got so he was almost terrified to take a gun in an exercise. We tried joking he was gun shy but it was pointed out that it wasn't the best idea we could ever have."
Kara carefully began fitting the shot glasses into their part of the case, not looking at her squad.
"So, the next time we had an exercise, I get my blaster and have a bit of a misfire in the corridor, made Shy swap with me after they got done yelling at me. I ended up with the dud, and Shy got the working gun."
"Suddenly the number of demerits your squad racked up makes so much more sense," Blaze muttered.
"Yeah, but look at it this way, on the last shipment out before the siege, we sent back a hundred and twenty-two malfunctioning blasters because Shy and I went through all the guns we had and weeded out the bad ones." Hopper said.
Kara closed the lid on her box, catching their attention. "I should go. We'll be at the rendezvous soon." Part of her wanted them to ask her to stay, but she knew she had things to do. The least she could do was give them space. "You're welcome to use the room until we drop out of hyperspace. They'll bring a tray of caff soon, unless you tell them otherwise." She stood up and picked up her box. "You did good work, and I thank you for it."
She'd spent years learning to hide her emotions when she couldn't let them go. That mask was her saving grace as Kara left a group she dearly wanted to be a part of. She was a Jedi, and there were rules, after all.
A/N: This is my first ever Star Wars fic. I was asked to flesh it out more, but to be honest, this was written as I worked my way into the characters. I'm not well-versed in all of the canon, because I haven't finished the Clone Wars cartoon, and I cannot read comic books (I can't keep track of the panels because of the layout). I do hope to get more involved in the minutiae of this universe as I go along. I will add that Ilan and it's associated culture is all original, I created it on my own and borrowed it here to give Kara (and her dad) a culture I knew (or could develope) the ends and outs for. As for tethes? Imagine if someone mixed Nyquil and cherry-flavored Nyquil, that's the first shot. The second shot dulls the flavor to something a little more appealing than Nyquil. (Yes, I do think cherry-flavored Nyquil is the worst drinkable liquid in the known world.)