Say Anything

Summary: Since the accident, Bifur was isolated in his own mind. He had given up all hope of being close to his family and friends again. The idea of forming a new relationship was nothing short of an impossibility, but a young, over curious prince may just prove him wrong.

Chapter 3

Kili was frozen to the wall, trying desperately to get a hold of himself. He was hurt, and he was struggling to realize why. He had gotten some kind of high hope for Bifur, and whatever his expectations had been, they were shattered. He had never expected Bifur to look at him, directly in his eyes, and act as if he had never seen him before... like he wanted to hurt him... but then again, he had stopped.

He had stopped!

Suddenly all of the memories of Bifur's episodes flooded back to him. More than once had he seen Bifur violently lunged at his own family. Even Thorin... but he had the young prince in his grip, literally, and yet he had faltered... thought... hesitated... remembered. As the conclusion of the thoughts brought him to his feet, he saw Bofur fly down the ladder to the loft, with Thorin close behind.

Kili started to run to them, but a large object caught his attention. It was another large wooden bench. He dropped down, and it flew over him. He looked up just in time to see that the whole company was on it's feet. Dwalin grabbed Ori's wrist and yanked him out of the way. Then he saw his brother, and Bilbo standing right in the path of the massive projectile. Fili reacted quickly, nearly diving to safety, but stopped himself when he saw that the hobbit was frozen in his place, eyes gaping. The elder prince jumped over with no hesitation, putting his back towards the colossal missile. He wrapped his arms around Bilbo, and dropped as quickly, and as low, as he could, curving himself over the burglar.

They were too far away for Kili to know for sure if they had been hit, but he did not hesitate to wonder. He dashed to the corner where the bench had landed. It took him only a few seconds, and when he made it, he noticed instantly that the bench had been lodged to each wall, making a small triangle of safety. Kili slid under it swiftly, and finally released the breath he was holding, when he saw his brother and the hobbit, still in the same position, with Fili's shoulders mere inches from where the bench had been stopped.

"Fili..?" Kili choked out, and dropped down beside them.

Bilbo looked up instantly, his eyes moving frantically, realizing for the first time what had just happened. Fili looked up at the bench, then to his brother. A grin slowly crawled onto his face, and he sighed deeply. Kili couldn't help but returned it, relieved for his brother's safety. He waited until Bilbo's eyes went back to the bench before subtly reminding his brother, with gestures, that he was still holding the hobbit. The prince nearly gasped, yanked himself up, bringing Bilbo with him, and then released him so suddenly, the hobbit almost fell over.

"Um..." Fili dusted the hobbit's coat off, and did his best to ignore his brother's snickering, as he rose to join them. "Are you alright?"

"I'm..." Bilbo had to literally shake himself back to reality. "I'm fine. Thank you..."

As adorable as the scene was, once it sank in that his brother, and Bilbo, were unharmed, he remembered Bifur, and suddenly realized it was quiet. He ducked under the bench, and saw Bofur placing a blanket over the, now sleeping, warrior. He walked over slowly, making sure that Bifur was breathing and alright. Bofur and Bombur noticed him instantly.

"He'll be alright, lad." Bofur said with a small smile. "Just needs some rest."

Kili nodded, but couldn't take his eyes off of him. He spoke: "I didn't mean to ... I mean... I just thought... he might be cold." He looked up at the brothers, and both had understanding in their eyes.

"Kili." Bofur said, "You didn't do that. Bifur didn't do that. It was the ax..." He nodded as if that was supposed to be a satisfactory answer, but the pain in his own eyes showed that it was just all he rationalize it as.

"But he... remembered me."

"What?" Bombur closed his eyes, and shook his head. He smiled at Kili as if he were young child that needed an explanation to a simple thing. "Kili... Lad, he doesn't know anything when he's like that."

"He did. He could've hurt me. He had the chance, and he didn't."

Bofur walked over to the prince, and placed a kind hand on his shoulder. "Kili, don't take this the wrong way, but if you were that close to him, and you didn't get hurt... you should consider yourself very lucky." He glanced over to his cousin. "That ... wasn't him." He gave the prince a gentle squeeze, turned and hugged his brother, before he walked off slowly to rejoin Thorin.

Bombur watched his brother go with a worried sigh, then turned his head to look at his cousin. He let out another worried sigh, and then directed his attention to the confused prince. "It's nice of you to worry about him, laddie... but don't trick yourself into thinking he isn't dangerous." He paused for a moment to watch his cousin take a few breaths, before adding: "Let him sleep." Kili nodded, and Bombur returned it, then made his way over to the others, who were doing their best to remove the bench from the walls.

Kili watched him go. He couldn't help but disagree with both him, and Bofur. His heart just knew differently. He took a deep breath, and walked back over to the wall he'd found himself glued too before. There was another large bench against it. Kili sat, well, more like climbed, on it, and let his eyes travel around the massive room, and the dwarves within it. Everyone seemed wrapped up in their own little world, but the elephant in the room was ever present and the quest, and it's looming dangers, were not forgotten.

Life goes on, however, and he could see everyone was coping in their own ways.

Thorin had found solace in Bofur. He glanced over to the loft, but it was nothing but darkness. Which was less and less surprising the more Kili thought of it. Though Thorin was a bit gruff, and seemed harsh, he'd always had a soft spot for humor, and a warm spirit, which Bofur was simply full of. Especially in this intense situation, a dramatic person like Thorin was sure to act, well, dramatically. He found himself wondering what would happen once the quest was done. Thorin was incredibly unpredictable. He was also honorable, however, and he couldn't see his uncle putting himself into a relationship like that without good reason. Kili believed that they would be happy for a long time.

He let his gaze drop to Bifur. He seemed to be sleeping so soundly, but the young prince knew better. He never seemed to sleep well, and it always looked tired, though he did try to hide it. His eyes dropped now to the ground as he realized that Bifur tried to hide a lot of things. He was frustrated that he hadn't noticed it sooner. He wanted to feel close with Bifur. For whatever reason, he felt drawn to him, and the urge was strong.

Suddenly, he couldn't help but smile. He thought of teasing Fili about his similar attraction to Bilbo. However, the smile faded quickly, as he felt a strain of jealously flow though him. He wished he could be as confident as his brother. He seemed to have Bilbo in the palm of his hand the day after he mentioned that he found him slightly attractive. Of course, it had always been like that. Once Fili wanted something, he seized it.

Kili had never been so bold, and besides, Bifur was a bit different than Bilbo. The entire situation was different, though he wasn't sure that Thorin would approve of either courtship. Bilbo, for his race, and Bifur for his age, and ... problem. If Thorin even had time to worry about them with his own relationship blooming. Of course, it was wrong of him to assume Bifur even saw him that way. He took a deep breath, trying his best to come to any conclusion other than just leaving it alone, but he had none. Slowly, he stood, and decided some rest may help to clear his mind.

He made his way back over to the fire, expecting everyone to already be asleep. He was partially correct. Everyone was sleeping soundly, spread out around the fire. Even Fili and Bilbo had some distance between them, but Ori sat up, against the wall, writing away in the massive ledger he had brought on the journey. The young scribe looked up as Kili approached, and he gave him a light smile.

"Going to sleep, Master Kili?"

"I should." Despite his response, he sat beside Ori, watched the dwindling fire with little interest.

Ori watched him for a second, confused as to why he wasn't lying down as he had insinuated. He could see the thoughtful look on his face, and it was so out of place for Kili. He was normally so happy. "Are you alright?" He asked finally.

Kili looked up slowly, and gave him a little smile. "Of course."

Ori nodded, though he did not seem convinced. He kept his eye on the young prince, and his quill stopped moving, but then, his head turned quickly, and he started writing a bit faster. He did so for a few seconds, and stopped, seemingly happy with his recent addition. Kili watched him, but said nothing. Ori was always writing away in that book, and he wasn't too interested in it at the moment. Perhaps later, he noted, for it wasn't a complete bore to think about.

Of course, his mind was definitely elsewhere, and it was starting to really affect him.

For whatever reason, this quest was bringing something out in the company. Everyone seemed more open to one another. There was a closeness with everyone, but with others, it was something else. The only thing Kili could think to describe it was: fate. Which, he had never had much believe in. Perhaps it was the impending death around every corner, or perhaps it could be more. He certainly saw a change in everyone. Mostly for the good, he hoped. It made him feel even worse to think of his friends, and family unhappy in any way. He had to shake his head, trying to rid the thoughts from his mind, and he stood up so quickly, Ori almost jumped.

"I think I'm going to sleep now." He said to the scribe, who simply smiled at him, and nodded, before going back to writings. Kili found his pack easily, and as he set up his bedroll, he glance over his shoulder, one last time, to Bifur, who was still in the same position, sleeping deeply. He watched him for a moment, and tried desperately to understand why he was so ... interested in him, but no satisfying answer ever came to mind. He had to smirk, and shrug at the idea that "fate" might just be a thing, and it was working it's hand on all of them. He almost laughed out loud at the absurdity of it, as he snuggled into his bedroll. He made sure to turn away from Bifur. From everyone, in fact.

Perhaps all he needed was a good night's sleep.