Chapter 12

A/N: If you want the details surrounding Jack and Mia's kiss, read littletonpace's amazing story Missing In Action, featuring her OC Mia. The basics are gone over in this chapter of my story. Littletonpace and I are taking the kiss two different ways, but she was awesome enough to give me permission to use it in my story

Matt stirred, flinching as he felt the stitches pull sharply against his healing skin. Fumbling around the tent, his searching hands were unable to locate a single bottle of painkillers. Grounding his hands in the sand, he attempted to raise himself up, getting halfway there before Jack came tearing in.

"I'm so sorry I wasn't here," Jack said frantically, hurrying to kneel behind Matt and support him to a sitting position. Reaching in his pocket, Jack extracted a bottle of painkillers, but as he opened it, his shaking hands spilled the pills into the sand. "Shit!" Jack's attempts to pick the tablets up only seemed to result in them being buried deeper.

"Hey," Matt said gently, laying a hand on Jack's arm. "It's okay. You're allowed to take a walk, or get some food, or use the bathroom, whatever you were doing."

"I kissed Mia," Jack blurted out, staring down at the ground, hands frozen in the sand. "Or she kissed me, but I didn't stop her. I did pull back, but not for a few seconds. I-"

"Get out." Matt's voice had changed completely, gone hard and cold. His eyes were flat, the light gone, as he exerted all his effort to pull away from Jack and sit up on his own.

"I'm so sorry, Matt." Jack was babbling now, voice rising to a frantic pitch. "We were both just scared, we had seen you almost die, and Sawyer had been such an asshole to her, and-"

"Stop." Matt wrapped his arms around his chest, ignoring the sharp twinge of stitches. "All the signs were there, I should have just accepted them."

"Signs?" Jack reached a hand out. "Babe, please-"

"Please stop!" Tears leaked from between the fingers Matt had plastered against his face. "Clearly you want to be with women. I don't know what you thought you were doing with me, pity, or fear of being alone, or a fucking experiment, but I can't do this anymore. You know the relationship I just got out of, I can't have another fucked up one. I can't."

"Don't say that," Jack begged, tears streaming down his face. "Don't say that. I love you, I do, I do-"

"If you don't get out, I'm going to leave." Matt began to push himself to his feet, unable to restrain the whimpers of pain slipping past his lips.

"You're going to hurt yourself," Jack said frantically, barely able to restrain his hands at his sides.

"Then you get out," Matt said, voice ice cold as he closed his eyes, covering his face again with shaking hands. He heard a sob, and the tent flap open, and footsteps across the sand.

Matt lay back on the makeshift bed, shoulders shaking with sobs, until Mia's face suddenly appeared at the tent entrance. "Yeah, you're definitely second-in-command on my list of people I don't want to see ever again," Matt spat out, sitting up slowly and supporting himself against the closest tent pole.

"I ran into Jack, and he told me what happened," Mia said softly, perching at the entrance.

"And then you pushed him against a tree and ravaged him, right?" Matt said bitterly, refusing to meet her eyes.

"I deserve that," Mia said, looking down at her hands. "I'm sorry. I…" Trailing off, she moved into the tent, sitting at the opposite end from Matt. "I went off with Sawyer, and we got in a huge fight like we always do, and I ran off, and I ran into Jack. I was shaken from my fight, he was shaken from almost losing you, and…" Glancing up, she moved forward, until she was directly in front of Matt. "You didn't see what it was like when you were shot. It was like I was literally watching Jack's heart break right in front of me. We both needed comfort."

"Are you attracted to him?" Matt asked softly, staring down at his hands.

"Yes," Mia answered simply. "But I'm attracted to you too." Matt's eyes shot up, and he laughed for the first time since the morning had begun. "It doesn't mean you love Jack any less, right?"

"I haven't kissed you though." Matt brushed the remaining tears off his cheeks, and met Mia's eyes.

"I'm really sorry." Mia lay a hand on Matt's arm, and this time he didn't pull away. "Matt, I can't tell you how sorry I am. I don't like who I'm becoming on this island. I'm turning into my worst self, but you and Jack, you're turning each other into your best selves. I just, for a second, wanted to feel like that. But I shouldn't have done what I did, and I'm so sorry. And I know Jack is too, trust me, when I saw him he was just sitting in the sand, staring at the ocean, tears streaming down his face. It was absolutely pathetic. You can't let him be that pathetic."

Matt laughed again, and Mia joined in. "It's my duty to save him from being so pathetic, isn't it?" Matt said with a soft grin.

****

Jack heard footsteps behind him, and whirled around, eyes clouding with disappoint when he saw Kate crouch down.

"Ouch," she said softly, staring out at the waves. "You really don't like me anymore, do you?"

"I thought maybe it was Matt, maybe he'd come after me, and…never mind." Crossing his arms over his knees, Jack leaned his chin on his right wrist.

"What happened?" Kate asked, keeping a few inches between them. Jack didn't meet her eyes, and for a few minutes there was silence.

"I screwed up, badly, and now Matt wants nothing to do with me," Jack finally said, softly, one hand raking through his hair.

"I'm sorry," Kate said, just as softly, leaning back on her hands. Another few moments of silence passed before Kate spoke again. "You shouldn't give up. You should figure out some way to show him how much you care, and you should go back and make him see how sorry you are."

"You're right," Jack said, a spark back in his voice as he hurried to his feet. Pausing for a second, he turned to face Kate. "Thank you. You…you should stop by sometime, I know Matt would love to see you."

"I'd really like that," Kate said, her face lighting up as she blinked back a tear. "I'll do that."

****

Matt heard footsteps approaching the tent and turned, to see Jack ducking under the flap, a bouquet of wildflowers in his hands. "I want you," Jack said, voice strong as he held Matt's gaze. "Yes, I've kissed women, I've been attracted to women, I find Mia attractive, but I want you. I have no idea what I'm doing, and I have no idea why you'd want me back, but I want to be with you. I love you."

"You brought me flowers?" Matt asked, grinning as he pointed at the copious amount of flowers Jack was clutching.

"Is that ok, do guys like getting flowers? I told you I have no idea what I'm doing," Jack babbled, and Matt reached out his hand, taking Jack's free hand and gently pulling him down next to him.

"It's incredibly sweet of you, and I love them," Matt answered, holding Jack's hand between his own. "I can't remember the last time someone brought me flowers. Jason never did…my ex I mean, he never…" Matt dropped his head, and Jack lay the flowers next to Matt's bed, reaching his hand out to cup Matt's cheek and raise his eyes up.

"I don't ever want to hurt you," Jack said, eyes locked with Matt's. "I know how he hurt you, and you know I'd never do that to you, never, but I don't want to hurt you even a little bit. But I keep screwing up."

"You're kinda new to this," Matt chuckled softly, and Jack nodded, a soft laugh escaping his lips.

"I want to be with you," Jack whispered, running his shaking hands down Matt's arms. "But I'm…" He looked down, closing his eyes. "What if I'm a disappointment? What if I'm terrible? I've never done this before, and I'm sure I won't be what you deserve-"

"Hey," Matt said gently, laying his hands on Jack's arms and squeezing reassuringly. "Look at me." He waited until Jack looked up, and then closed the space between them, kissing Jack softly on the lips. Forehead resting against Jack's, he stared right into his eyes. "You could never disappoint me, ever."

Jack tilted his chin up until their lips met, his arms wrapping around Matt as the kiss deepened. Matt leaned back against the tent pole, hands roaming under Jack's shirt and settling on his chest, Jack moaning at the touch, his own hands sliding down to Matt's ass and gripping tightly. Matt gasped, his back arching involuntarily and colliding hard with the tent pole, sending half the tent collapsing down onto the two men.

The two lay sprawled on the sandy floor, covered in canvas, Jack's chin on Matt's chest, his hand still on Matt's ass, both men shaking the canvas with their laughter. "See, you bring the house down with your kisses," Matt choked out, and Jack started laughing harder, burying his face in Matt's shaking stomach.

"As long as I don't have to give you the sex talk, like I did Jordan, we'll be fine," Matt grinned, and Jack grinned back, kissing Matt's smiling lips.

"I can't let you engage in any…physical activity…until you're completely healed," Jack sighed, dropping his head back onto Matt's chest with a deep sigh of frustration.

"So very not fair." Matt echoed Jack's sigh, head dropping back on to the sand. A second later, he picked it up again, flashing Jack a smile. "I'll just need lots of personal attention from my doctor then. Lots of TLC."

"I don't think I've ever enjoyed being a doctor so much," Jack said with a grin, laying his lips on Matt's before rising to fix their home.