I know this chapter took forever to come out, but I wanted it to be the best it could be. Blueflower was hard to right because she is a very soft, frightened she-cat, but she loves her kits to death. It was challenging to write, but I think she came out wonderfully. I would like to thank all my reviews; you guys inspire me to write. (Marshmellowtime, Broken Wolf' Soul Spirit, KTD Lover, BlackflameofPhoneixClan, Mossshine, RedWolf, ADHD kid in jail, SilverWolf1499, Mintfrost29, Brightcloud of the Clans, Phantomflower.)
Time: Day 3
Character: Blueflower of OakClan
Ch. 14 Teacher
I lay down in my brittle nest. The sun had just risen, but I was already tired out. My right eye was swollen shut, and I could barely see. The gray mush Waterberry had applied only made the wound sting more.
I shifted the smallest amount, not wanting to wake my kits. A small thorn pricked against my tail, the result of a uncaring apprentice. It twitch the tiniest amount in the pain of surprise, but it attracted the attention of a half-awake kitten.
"Look at the ferocious beast," said Nightkit, a yawn erupting over his tiny face. "It is just swinging carelessly from the trees."
Nightoak did nothing to stop him as he got into a hunting crouch, his tiny claws piercing the mossy ground. "The hunter pounces in his prey," he cried as he leaped towards my slowly moving tail.
I let out a low pitch cry when I felt his claws dig into my fluffy tail. The pain seemed nonexistent to some instances that I remembered. "Pain is nothing," I hissed to myself, quiet enough that no one heard.
When Nightkit started climbing all over my scarred back, I gave Nightoak a pitiful look. She looked slowly from me to her wild kit and started grooming her fur. Her frozen heart flashed briefly in her eyes, cold and distant.
Blood dripped down my back, melding into my already matted and unruly fur. I hadn't cleaned it in days, there was really no point. Nightclaw would run his claws and ruin my careful job.
"Are you alright, Mommy," said Lilackit. She must have just woken because she snuggled closer to my fur, trying to fend of the cool morning breeze. "You look like you are in pain. I could go fetch Waterberry or Gingerfrost for you. They are always willing to help."
Her innocence made me smile; she thought the whole world was fair and equal. No matter how many times Nightclaw beat me, she seemed to see goodness in him, in toms as a whole.
"I'm okay," I gritted through my teeth. I was trying to not upset Nightkit with any sudden movements. If he tumbled from my back, Adderstar's answer would be unleashed upon me.
"I'll be gone soon," I whispered to help me get through the pain. The more blood that dripped, the worse I felt. I looked up towards StarClan, hoping that my kits would be too sleepy-eyed to notice my dilemma.
"What do you mean you'll be gone?" asked my other she-kit, Rosekit. Her little tongue peaked out of mouth as she yawned. "Are you going to be leaving us? I thought you loved us."
"I really love both of you," I said, grief leaking into my voice. "but I can't stay. This is my last day in the nursery." I wrapped my tail around them, hoping that would convey by sadness more then my words could.
Lilackit cuddled even closer to me, like she was trying to remember my scent. "Why are you going? We need you here. You protect us from our father. I don't think he knows we are his daughters."
"He knows who you guys are," I told her, my heart crying out. "He just doesn't love you like he loves Dawnkit and Icekit. You must never trust a tom, understand."
"What about Ashkit," said Rosekit, bringing up her mate for the first time. "He isn't bad. He is so cute when he curls up to Ivyfrost."
"That is because he is only one moon old," I told her, hating every word I said. "You must never make him angry. You must be a good she-kit when I go."
"You never said why you are going," wailed Lilackit. "Is it some secret that is too important for us to know. Do you even know?"
A small tear ran down my face and splattered against Rosekit's soft gray fur. "Your brother are being made into apprentices, so I must go back with the queens not nursing kits. I have already told you that sweeties, don't you remember?"
"But what about us," cried an indignant Rosekit. "Shouldn't we be going with you. Who will take care of us. Surely not Nightoak." The light gray kits whispered the last part as a shudder ripped through her small frame.
"I'd hate if you stayed with me and Mother," spat Nightkit at his mate and her sister. "You'll probably have to wait in the corner like the other she-kits with younger mates." With that, he scampered over to his mother, tripping over his big paws.
"Don't worry," I cooed to them, trying to keep my voice from shaking. "Twanyleaf is going to watch you for me. You know she will take good care of you."
"I thought Rainkit was Dawnkit's mate," said Lilackit, her voice edged with confusion. "Doesn't she become a young queen."
I licked my little kit on the head nervously, worried her intelligence would get her beaten. "Nightclaw persuaded Adderstar to let Rainkit stay her awhile longer. He didn't want his son's mate to die from malnutrition so early."
I tried to pretend to stay unaffected by my words, but I couldn't. I turned by head away from my two daughters to where my two sons were playing. The only reason Nightclaw cared about Rainkit was because she could carry Dawnkit's kits one day.
The two of them were tackling each other on the ground, getting pieces of dust and dirt in their pelts. "Could you please come over here you two," I called to them softly. "You are getting so dirty playing like that."
Rosekit and Lilackit scuttled away to Twanyleaf with gentle probing from my tail. Icekit ran over, his long white fur blowing in the soft breeze. "What is it Mother? We always play like that and you have never said anything." he asked me, some sweetness lingering in his voice.
Dawnkit took his time, like he was already an apprentice. His green eyes stared at me, identical to Nightclaw's. Fear came to my eyes; I was afraid of my own kit. "What is is?" His voice was so different then his brother's.
"I just wanted to clean up your fur," I muttered softly, the words scraping my throat. "Your apprentice ceremony is today, and I want your father to be proud of you." The fact the Icekit was happily mewing warmed my heart.
"Okay," he huffed, sauntering the last distance. "Just to make Father proud. I bet I'll get some awesome mentor, like Longwhisker. He can't speak, but he sure can fight."
"I'm sure you will sweetie," I mewed confidently as I licked the fluffy hair on his head. His black fur felt silky under my tongue, quietly obeying where I wanted it to go.
Dawnkit suddenly pulled away and turned to hiss at me. "I'm not your sweetie," he snapped. "I'll get Rainkit to clean my fur to me." With that last word, he stalked over to Twanyleaf, Rainkit, and my two beautiful daughters.
I tried to push his rejection out my my mind, but it kept replaying. I would only get worse as it went on. Apprentices always came back crueler then they left. Even precious Snowkit, now paw, was turning.
We queens had hope he would become our protector. He would save Skyfrost from whatever harm befell her. But soon, he was the reason she hurt. He turned from our side, like every other tom who had left the nursery.
"Keep up the cleaning, Mother," said Icekit as I stopped, my mind consumed by memories. "I want to look the best for my apprentice ceremony. I wonder who I'll get as a mentor. All the good warrior are already taken."
I smiled, grinning into his fur as I cleaned his neck fuzz. "I heard Pinepaw was being made into a warrior. Maybe you'll get Jadeclaw."
I tried to force the smile to stay put, but my lips curled up in fury. Jadeclaw had no mate, but he caused all queens some amount of pain. The two bite marks are my tail started to throb harder.
I didn't want to see my darling Icekit turned into a vicious monster. Seeing his adorable smile, I curled my tail tight around him, feeling his warmth seep into my skin.
"Are you alright, Mother," said my adorable darling. "Are you sick or something. Spottedfire could treat you; I'll even fetch him for you."
Tears sprang to my eyes with his sweet innocent words. "Never change who you are." I told him. "You are perfect the way you are, and other can't change you. You will always be my little tom-kit."
"Your embarrassing me, Blueflower," said Icekit, his personality changing drastically. He pulled away from me, causing his fur to spike up where my tongue was dragged across it.
My heart tore again until I saw Nightclaw in the doorway, then, it just stopped. Terror was etched on my face, and I couldn't speak. Instead, I motioned Dawnkit back towards me, hoping my mate would just leave me alone.
"Good morning, Blueflower," sneered Nightclaw, grinning at me viciously, but smiling sweetly at an excited Dawnkit and Icekit. "Are you two ready to be apprentices?"
"Yes, yes, yes, Father," cried out Icekit. He shifted from side to side, unable to contain his emotions any longer. "I can't wait. Do you and Adderstar have a good mentor picked out for me?"
The black tom ignored his hyperactive son. "Follow me, you three." Then when he turned around, only two of the three on his trail.
"Follow him, Rainkit," muttered Twanyleaf to the yawning cream-colored she-cat. "Your mate is becoming an apprentice. It is your duty to join him." She looked distraught as Rainkit stumbled to her large paws.
"Not her, you stupid she-cat," snapped Nightclaw, fury burning in his eyes. "Blueflower." I stumbled back when my name was mentioned, horror crossing my soft features. "Blueflower must come to the ceremony."
My worst nightmares leaped at me, and I stumbled back in shock, nearly falling on Rainkit. No words could spill from my mouth, they knew the consequence of speaking back to Nightclaw. Instead, I followed behind my two tom-kits.
Rosekit looked like she would tail along after me, but Lilackit and Twanyleaf held her back. "She would never leave you two willingly," I heard her whispered softly, hugging the three unfortunate kits. "She loves you too much."
I could hear Rosekit and Lilackit wishing me the best of luck in the back of their minds, their words traveling the empty space. I risked a slight wave of my tail, feeling like it might be my last good bye.
The mass of gathered toms made me wince. I could see their vicious eyes looking at me, trying to decide why I was present. Dunewind even gave me a sickly sweet smile that made me shudder down to my bones.
"She's mine," snapped Nightclaw, taking a swipe at the young warrior. "You know queens always come to the apprentice ceremony of their first tom-kits." The way he said it displayed his distaste for the custom.
Before Dunewind could say something back to my mate, Adderstar appeared on the top of the Great Stone with a striped brown tabby tom standing regally next to him. A silvery blue she-cat was hidden behind the two powerful toms.
She was the only she-cat in the crowd beside myself, but she looked different then me in every way. I could see my own reflection in the tom's eyes, defeated and weak, my bad eye dripping puss and showing my inability to stand up for myself.
Moonfrost, the young tom's mate, looked like she owned the world. Her deep green eyes showed no weakness, only perseverance. The mini scars on her back didn't display cowardice, but her restless spirit and will to be free.
She stared ahead even as Adderstar's words flew across the clearing, striking fear into my heart. I could see Dawnkit and Icekit, sitting at the front of the crowd, shaking with excitement. I wished one bit of their confidence could spill over to me.
"I have all the toms assembled here together to witness the rippling exchange of power," announced Adderstar, his voice far more powerful then his size would leave you guessing. "The apprentice becomes the warrior, and two kits begin their path for greatness."
The crowd cheered, their roars making me feel nervous. It felt like they were closing around me, cutting of my circulation. I wrapped my tail around my paws, trying to get my blood circulating again.
"We welcome a new warrior among our ranks," he shouted, the cheering dying down instantly, like they feared him too. "Pinepaw has been taught out ways Jadeclaw. He has learned dominance over she-cats."
That is when Moonfrost was pushed forward, stumbling as she approached the edge. She turned to hiss at who ever shoved her, but something forced her back towards the mass. "You can't keep treating us like this forever!" she shouted.
Nightclaw started to laugh. It seemed to spread like green-cough and soon, they were all laughing. "Show her your power," cried Adderstar, revealing in his command.
I felt sick to my stomach, helpless to stop what I knew was about to happen. My eyes were glued on the Pinepaw's glistening claws, shining through the air. As they sliced downward, the contents of my stomach shifted.
Blood dripped down Moonfrost's face to form the She-Cats Trail. It poured slowly at first, staining her unblemished face. As Pinepaw's claw cut deeper, the blood welled faster.
"We are stronger than you think," she shouted, until another slash of Pinepaw's claws tore her mouth. She spat a wad of blood red spit onto the ground. I could see she wanted it to splatter on Adderstar's bad eye, to commemorate Whiteoak.
My vision blurred as I saw myself, Bluefrost at the time, standing up there. Nightpaw stood over me, the fury still in his eyes. I fell to the ground, my legs to weak to hold me.
Suddenly, amid the blood-lustful cheering, a brown paw helped me up. "Stay strong and talk to Moonfrost and the reptile sisters. They have a plan." He melted back into the mass as soon as my legs locked to keep me up.
"Pinepaw is powerful," cried Adderstar, silencing the wild toms and chilling my heart. "He has shown he is worthy to be a full OakClan warrior. Moonfrost has bowed down before him."
As my eyes rose to meet Moonfrost's, I saw them blazing with green fury. For some strange reason, she wasn't defeated. Her blood might be dripping from the Great Stone, but it was still boiling in her veins.
She hadn't bowed down before Pinepaw. She was just as powerful as before. Her spirit hadn't been broken like all the she-cats who went before her. Adderstar didn't realize that this trail had been broken for he continued to speak.
"From now on, he shall be known as Pinethorn, for his sharp claws that don't hesitate to cut flesh." The newly named Pinethorn roared his approval, rearing on his hind paws and showing the world his blood coated claws.
"Pinethorn, Pinethorn, Pinethorn," chanted all the toms in the clearing. I could see Dawnkit and Icekit wiggling with anticipation. I know they were imagining the entire Clan shouting their names.
Chants still feared the clearing when I was pushed from behind. "Up you go, she-cat," cried someone from behind me. "Time to get your scars."
My heart dropped as one paws was placed in front of the others. I could barely muster the strength to leap from one steppingstone to the next. My legs felt like liquid, without the muscle to support my weight.
"We're going to be apprentices, Blueflower," said Icekit as he quickly bounded beside me. I managed a weak smile for my son until Nightclaw slashed it off my face. I yowled as blood slid into my mouth and down my jaw.
"You are not to speak to a she-cat like an equal," whispered Nightclaw, not wishing to draw the attention of the entire meeting. "She is far below you, right Icekit."
"Yes, Father," said Icekit, his head hanging low. He didn't remain remorseful for long; when he reached the next ledge, his head perked right back up. It seemed he had already forgotten my pain.
The pain in my jaw seemed to dull next to the agony in my heart. Icekit was already changing, forgetting the world of a she-cat. How long until he was just like his father?
When I reached the top, Adderstar slashed me on the back, causing me to spiral from my thoughts. "Scream," he spoke softly in my ear. "The toms need a show."
He turned away from my bloody face to address the whole congregation. "Dawnkit and Icekit are ready to move up in the ladder of command. Their mother, Blueflower, is here to be beaten."
Howls filled the clearing, and I could see my reflection in their eyes. Puss and rotting skin covered the right side of my face, the stench seeming so normal to me. Blood oozed down my back like snow drips into the nursery on a cold leaf-bare day.
Dawnkit slid to my right as Icekit scuttled to my left. Neither of them looked like me, they were pure Nightclaw. Their tiny claws were ready to draw blood for the first time.
"To show that they are ready to be warriors, they will hunt their first prey, a she-cat," shouted Adderstar. At the same time, I let out a curdling scream.
It was half from the pain, my skin was ripping and tearing. My pelt felt like it was on fire, the agony was so great. Their claws weren't dulled down by hunting or collecting herbs for Spottedfire, they were fresh.
Their claws also stabbed my heart. My own kits were attacking me, the one who had raised them. The blood seemed to disappeared as I remembered them playing with their sisters, not knowing they were supposed to hate them.
Adderstar pushed me aside onto Moonleaf. I had, apparently, fulfilled my purpose. She tried to usher me out of the view of the toms. "Get to the queen's den," she told me. "We can help you there."
"I want to see my sons," I told her, trying to push her out of the way. All I succeeded in doing was smearing my blood over her ragged fur. She did managed to pry me up so I could see the kits I had raised.
"Icekit has shown his worth as a member of OakClan," cried Adderstar as my sweet, naive son basked in his raise. "Icepaw, your mentor will be Whitestripe."
The huge white warrior bounded up the ledges with fearsome strength. He looked down upon Icepaw like he was a bug but smiled all the same. "I was that small once," he whispered, so only those close could hear.
"Icepaw, Icepaw, Icepaw," chanted all the toms, plus me. Moonleaf's eyes seemed to glaze over, like she was some place else; some place better then this.
"Dawnkit has also shown that he is ready to take his place. Even before now, he has shown the skill required to rank highly among the toms." Everyone was quite, and Nightclaw had a smirk on his face. "Dawnpaw, I will be your mentor."
It was quiet, I could hear the bugs chirping in the distance. Finally, the chant started and I was happy to join along. "Dawnpaw, Dawnpaw, Dawnpaw!"
My heart was still tumbling with emotions as some tom lead Moonleaf and myself to the queen's den. It seemed so dark and gloomy, like some one had turned the sun off.
My head spun from blood loss and the wild atmosphere of the ceremony. Faces spun in and out of my vision, like butterflies I used to chase when I was a kit.
Maybe I was a kit again. "Rustkit," I shouted, crying out for my childhood friend. "Do you want to play catch the moss? I'm sure Whiteoak will let you."
"Is she alright." "Is she crazy?" "What happened to her?" "Who is Rustkit?" "Does she know that Whiteoak is dead?" These voices seemed to draw me away from my hallucination.
I blinked my eyes, now seeing what was really going on around me. Worried eyes looked into mine, trying to decide what help I needed.
"Get her some moss to stop the bleeding. Cobwebs are even better if you can find them," shouted Moonleaf, seeming to be in her element. "Her mate is the deputy, she might know some moves."
Everyone just stood around me, looking at my bruises, welts, and cuts. "Well, go," snapped Serpentleaf. "Don't stare at her, Skyfrost. You'll look like her when your wonderful Snowpaw gets his warrior name."
Skyfrost scurried off with Brookleaf at her heels. When the rapid patter of their paws was replaced by dripping, stagnant water, the whole cave quieted. It seemed like we were all waiting for Moonleaf to speak.
"Blueflower," she said, addressing me. "We are forming a resistance to the tom's power. Actually, we formed it the day Blossomfrost was killed in Adderstar's den. But, still, we want you to join."
"My kits," I mumbled, not fully understanding what was happening around me. "Nightclaw would kill them. Poor Rosekit and Lilackit would be killed before they could become themselves."
"No," snapped Snakeleaf, walking right beside Serpentleaf. "In this world, they would never become themselves. They will be forced to mate and be beaten like you."
I looked towards the ground, too embarrassed to see eye to eye with them. I didn't want sweet Lilackit to end up like me, blood always pouring from some unhealed wound. Rosekit shouldn't have to live a life where she feared for her safety.
"Will Lilackit and Rosekit be safe if I join you cause?" I asked, scrambling to grasp the idea. "I couldn't imagine them being hurt because of something I do. I could never live with something like that weighing on my heart."
"Their life will be better," said Moonleaf as she motioned Brookleaf and Skyfrost to my side. "I plan on making she-cats equal to toms. Your kits could be warriors, able to protect themselves."
The idea seemed so absurd that I actually considered it. What would I do if I knew I could fight as well as Nightclaw? Would I be so littered with scars, would I even have kits?
"Won't cats get hurt," I asked, Redfrost and Shadowfrost on my mind. "Couldn't we die?" My voice was tense, there were so many risks with what Moonleaf was proposing.
"Aren't we already getting hurt. Tom's claws already bury their way into our fur and cause our blood to run." Her very words seemed to stir up everyone's slow burning desire to be free. "Blossomfrost is dead because we are scared to act."
"Oh, Blossomfrost," sighed Skyfrost as she dabbed up my wounds. She looked like she was about to weep, but she dabbed her eyes with the maroon moss. "Oh!"
Her grief reached my ears and tugged at my heart. She was so young, yet she had already suffered so much. I had already suffered so much at the hands of Nightclaw's and the other toms, would one more scar kill me?
"What would I have to do if I did you your resistance?" I asked, planning on joining no matter what they said. Rosekit and Lilackit deserved better then what they would get now. Even if I got hurt, they didn't have too.
"You have to teach us to fight," said Serpentleaf, rising from her position. "The toms won't back down peacefully, you know that. We need to protect ourselves," she said harshly, "and our kits," she added for my benefit.
"But I can't fight," I told her. To prove my point, I looked at her with my goo encrusted eye. My scars seemed to stare at her, trying to tell her I was weak and useless.
"But your mate can," said Snakeleaf, using the same tone as her sister. "You must have picked something up from him while he was beating you. A little tip you could share with the rest of us."
I closed my eyes, picturing Nightclaw, a vicious light in his eyes. The way his claws angled down at my face. That was usually my last vision because my world would go red with pain.
I pictured Icekit and Dawnkit tussling around as they played, kicking each other in the head. It wasn't real fighting, but it was more then any of these she-cats knew. I was something to start on.
Now they would be fighting for real; the thought appeared unannounced in my head. What if I had to face them in battle? Would I have to choose between my sons and my daughters? Could I make that choice?
When I closed my eyes, I could see the four of them fighting, but weren't my kits. Rosekit and Lilackit were fighting for freedom while Dawnpaw and Icepaw were fighting for power. I would be a dark age, but I would side with my gender if the time came.
I must have been in my nightmare world for a decent amount of time because Moonleaf looked surprised when I moved. "Do you have something to tell us?" she asked, knowing the answer full well.
"Yes," I stuttered, "yes I do." With that, I slashed by claws onto the moss, imagining it as Nightclaw when he struck Rosekit. Fury I never knew I possessed rose within me, unwilling to be tamed. It poured out in my actions, wanting no one else to suffer my fate.
"The show all of us," said Moonleaf as the rest of the she-cats lined up beside her. Skyfrost was shaking in her paws, but Brookleaf had a steely determination on her face. The sisters unsheathed their claws, thrilled to be using them.
Scared to be in power, I backed away. "You know what," I told them, my disappointment reflecting in their eyes, "I don't think I can do this. I have never told any cat what to do before."
The world was spinning before my eyes as I looked at them. "My wounds would get in the way," I explained, making up a flimsy excuse. "I would be able to move normally, you know, like a warrior."
The word felt weird sliding off my tongue. Warrior. It seemed impossible that I was comparing myself to one after I had just been beaten by one.
Moonleaf walked up to me and put her tail around my shoulders. "That is no excuse," she laughed, like I was just making a joke. "We all believe in you, Blueflower. I know you can teach us; they know you can teach them."
"Please Blueflower," said Skyfrost, her voice timid and uneven. "I want to know. I don't want Snowpaw to hurt me anymore."
"Sure, I'll teach you," I found myself telling her. She seemed so much like Lilackit, young and full of dreams. "You want to hold your paw like this, you claws unsheathed."
As the cats gathered around me, I began to feel like a mentor among many apprentices. I felt like a mother among kits. I fell into the role I had held for the past six moons, a teacher.
I grew in confidence as they grew in skill. Maybe all of this was possible.
I really love all reviews, and not begging to much, could please give me a little feedback.
Next chapter, a try at Duskkit. It is going to be rather short I'm afraid. I just want everyone to see how the tom's in BloomClan are faring. But Dusky is a little cutie, I think, so he will be adorable. He is the same age as my two kittens, so his personality is going to be perfect.
I had a questions raised about StarClan (hello Phantomflower.) I'm going to answer it towards the end because I don't want to give away anything major. StarClan is going to play a large role at the conclusion of our tale.
Once again, I apologize for how long it takes to update. Homework and swim practice accompany much of my time. I do love this story, but updates will take a while.