My name is Coldsteel the Hedgeheg

by Coldsteel666

In which we are introduced to Coldsteel the Hedgeheg, who, after defeating Sonic in battle, finds himself in a strange new world in a weak new body. Coldsteel realizes that if he is alive in a new reality, Sonic might be too, and he may have to defeat Sonic in battle using strange new creatures called Pokémon to do it.

3. I was Stronger than All My Classmates

Now, the day I have been waiting for has finally arrived. I'm about to start my adventure as a Pokémon trainer, and Alola has many strong Kanto Pokémon for me to create a team with. I am excited, even if my face can only show a blank and emotionless expression.

My mother's pet Pokémon, Meowth, wakes me up. I take a look around the room and check out the book my father left me. It has some basic advice on how to go about a Pokémon adventure, which should be helpful for me.

I wonder if Hitler was the father of this body too. It might provide some partial explanation as to why I'm in it, if that were true.

I leave my bedroom to see my mother in the living room. I never had a mother until a few months ago. I was born with a special power, after all. Now that I have a mother, it seems I didn't miss out on much. I hate my mother, she doesn't understand me at all. She doesn't get the darkness that lies within my heart, the pain and anguish I suffer, the difference between Jinco Jeans and Levis, or even what type of purple is cool and what type of purple is gay. I can barely stand her. How can someone be so clueless?

My mother asks me if I'm excited about catching Pokémon in Alola. Yeah, and I'm also excited to be leaving you behind.

We have a visitor, and I get the door. It's the Pokémon Professor turns up to our house. He tells me we're going to visit a Kahuna, which is apparently a quality Pokémon trainer, and get me a starter Pokémon. Sweet, I want to pick a Charmander and train up a badass dragon with huge nails.

I quickly get dressed - my clothes are shit but hopefully I'll be able to buy some cool stuff later like purple shirts and Jinco Jeans and earrings - and leave. Time to start the hunt for Sonic the Hedgehog. Later, losers.