A/N: A little bit of violence in this chapter.

I inhaled shakily, the acrid smoke claiming me. I was so angry, angry at Carlisle and the Cullens for their cryptic way of speaking. Mad at myself for being angry, I had no reason to be, he'd done right by me. I rested my head on my hands, closing my eyes, letting the cool air, and the smell of fresh rain calm me further. I sat on the porch steps for a while. I wasn't sure how long, but I looked up to find that the whole time Charlie had not been home. His car missing from the driveway. I sighed, exhausted, embarrassed, and still shaky from whatever Emry had given me. I decided to turn in, hoping I'd feel better in the morning, standing I started up the steps then froze.

A growl, deep, and rough, sounding so loud in the quiet night air. I willed myself to turn, all my hair standing on end, heart pounding in my chest. There crouched on large hind legs was a giant, black wolf. It wasn't Sam. Adrenaline surged through me, I whipped around and bolted for the front door, but the wolf was quicker. Teeth sunk into the rubber of my shoes, and the creature used it as leverage to throw me to the ground. My head it the grass hard, the edges of my vision blurring.

It put a large front paw… hand? It looked humanoid, it's face, terrifying black features following my every move. Forcing me to look into it green eyes. It ducked down, and with a snarl it's teeth sunk into my thigh. I wanted to scream, to fight it off, but I was frozen. It looked up once again, meeting my eyes, my blood and flesh caught in it's teeth. The wolf moved off of me, claws catching on the soft skin of my stomach, tearing into me. I made a pathetic choked out noise.

Once the creature was gone I slowly lifted my head, looking down at my stomach. I moved my shirt out of the way and saw the wounds it'd left. I almost screamed when I saw the white of fat exposed in the deep gashes. My head dropped back to the ground, I was bleeding a lot. I knew I should scream, or even crawl to the house and call for help, but I couldn't find it in me to do so.

Maybe it's better like this.

I just closed my eyes, exhausted.

Charlie paced, he couldn't sit still. Bella watched him, she had attempted to comfort him, but he wasn't having it. He didn't want to hear anything but 'She's stable.' Hell, it was hour three, he'd settle for 'alive'. He still had his daughter's blood on him. Charlie was on Carlisle the moment he came out of the door, still dressed in his surgeon's gown. "She's stable. We were able to find the arteries that were punctured and stitch them. But she'd lost a lot of blood. Tonight's going to be hard, but if she makes it through it, she will be alright."

"I want to see her." Charlie demanded, "I understand, she's being moved to the I.C.U as we speak, you can find her there." He was gone in a moment, and Carlisle sighed.

"Did you have to…" Bella trailed off, looking lost.

"No, but if her condition worsens…" Bella nodded.

"Are you okay?"

He just shook his head and said, "You should go be with her too." Before making his way to his office.

"She'll be alright, dad." Bella squeezed her father's shoulder. "She's always alright. Do you remember when she climbed that big tree in the back yard?" He nodded. "And she fell of, cracked her head open and I thought she was… Well she was fine. And she will be this time." Charlie just shook his head and squeezed Delilah's hand tighter.

Carlisle sat at his desk, head buried in his hands. He didn't say a word or look up when Rosalie entered the room. "Carlisle…" She shook her head, closing the door behind her. "You can't blame yourself. You couldn't have made her stay. We all know how stubborn she is. She'll pull through this."

"Alice still can't see her-" He choked down a sob.

"Alice has been wrong before. All the time actually." She put a hand on her father-figure's shoulder. "She'll be fine. But I think we need to figure out what to do… after." her words hung in the air. Carlisle shook his head. There was no cure, and because of that hell's gates were just about ready to open on this town.

"We can't kill her, Rose."

"What!? Of course not. We'll have to turn her-" Carlisle stood so suddenly, making Rosalie jump. "Carlisle, please. You know when she becomes a wolf she won't be able to control herself. And the full moon is three days away. We turn her then at least she'll be able to learn." Werevamps were powerful, and in control while shifted, but turning a were was hard. And most don't survive the transition.

"We can't risk it. I can't risk her."

Rosalie sighed. "I guess this isn't our call to make, let's wait for her to wake up and make that choice herself."

I groaned, the first thing I knew was pain. My body was alight with it. Every single inch. I opened my eyes, slowly, the dimed fluorescents still too bright. "Delilah, c'mon baby, can you were me?" I vaguely registered who the voice belonged to. "Dad?" I sounded foreign to myself. Voice scratchy from lack of use. "Yes, the doctor in coming, you're going to be alright." It was barely a moment before Carlisle came bursting past the curtains. "Delilah, it's Carlisle. Do you know what happened?" I looked up at him, anger long forgotten.

"I'll tell you," I said, attempting to sit up, but only to be pushed back down. "If you give me some more fucking morphine."

I had been out for a day, they told me. I was almost, angry. Why didn't I die? I'd never outright commit suicide, but I wasn't afraid of death. The idea of it was almost, competing. A final peace. But I wasn't dead. Instead I was lying in a hospital bed, in foggy agony, far away from any kind of peace. It sucked.

At least they waited until I had eaten. I thought as Rosalie and Carlisle stood at the foot of my bed. I'd convinced Charlie to go get some coffee, and now I regretted it. "You don't have to make this decision now…"

"But in the next two days." I laughed bitterly. "You want me to choose between outright death, or potential death and immortality. And you want me to make this choice in 48 hours."

Carlisle looked to be in more pain than I was. And when he attempted to take my hand I pulled it away from him. Once again, ignoring the guilt.

"No." I said.

"What?" Rosalie looked thrown off. "Delilah, sweetie, please-"

"Nope. I'm not going to die, and I'm not going to let one of you try to turn me."

"But, you'll turn anyways-"

"So what. I'll live in the forest, and… I don't know, occasionally kidnap the kids who don't eat their veggies." Rosalie sighed.

"Rose, it's her choice. And she's made it."

"Delilah look at me. You will hurt people, and the only way to prevent it-"

"No, I'm going to die on my terms, If I do kill people, fine. End me then. But not now."

Carlisle turned to Rosalie. "I'll see you at home." And she left, looking defeated.

Carlisle sat on the bed, looking down at me. "I'm sorry, Delilah." I squinted at him, "For what?"

He looked so… broken. "I didn't protect you." I shook my head.

"What? This isn't your fault. Anyways."

I sat up further, in much less pain. And he froze. Studying me. "A symptom of turning is accelerated healing." He muttered and my eyes widened. Oh shit. He looked at me like he was asking for permission to lower my blanket, and I nodded. He moved my gown out of the way and looked at the large bandages on my stomach and leg. Slowly he peeled away the one on my stomach. The wound was barely swollen, already scabbed like I'd been healing for weeks. Holy fuck!

He moved off the bed. "I need to get those staples out, now, before they heal into your body anymore then they already have." And with that he was gone, and I was alone.

I started out the window, Carlisle never leaving my side. "You should go."

I head Carlisle shake his head. "I'm not going to leave you alone here, you're in a very-"

"I'm not going to turn and kill people until the full moon, there is no need to babysit me."

"That wasn't what I was going to say,"

"Then what Carlisle." I turned over to look at him. The pain a distant memory. "What, what were you going to say?"

"You've just experienced a very traumatic event. You shouldn't be by yourself right now."

I shook my head, looking back at the sunset.

"I'm going to take a shower." I walked quickly to the bathroom and locked the door. Carlisle had gotten me moved to a private room, it was better then turning and being in an open room, that's for sure, and it had it's own bathroom. I stipped off the hospital gown and underwear, without the bandages I could see what was left of the wounds, nothing but pink scar tissue. It was terrifying, and amazing. I stepped into the shower before it had a chance to get hot, wondering if I could smoke in here.

I closed my eyes, letting the warming water run over me. I felt the pain rise back up in my chest, and finally I let the first sob out. I shouldn't have come back, after everything, it's Forks that kills me. I shook my head sinking to the floor. I missed him so much. Josh always had a plan, and if not, he made me feel like he did. I curled into myself, the water beating down on me. I wanted my old life. As fucked up as it had been, drugs, alcohol, at least I'd never had the risk of turning into a fucking werewolf. How could he leave me?

Carlisle rested his head in his hands. The ache in his chest unbearable as he listened to the cries of his mate. He needed to comfort her, needed to make this better. But he could do nothing but listen. He could feel her pain, feel the agony she was in. And he knew he was most likely going to lose his mate, one way or another, in 48 hours. He was supposed to have an eternity with her and he would only get two days.

It was sickly unfair, a joke. He truly was to be punished, his soul damned. Shaking his head he stood. Getting to work on packing her things for the trip home. He would spend as much time with her as possible, and he'd continue to look for a cure. There must be one. Fate couldn't cut her life short here?

It was a while before she exited the bathroom, shamelessly clad in only a towel. Carlisle looked away, "There's clothing on the bed for you." A simple t-shirt and sweatpants Alice had brought in as Delilah's clothing was far too destroyed to be worn again.

She said nothing, grabbing the outfit and returning to the washroom. Carlisle reluctantly left as well to finish her release papers.