Chapter 4

The day after the arrival of the Marauders with a silence like after a storm. Lily ate alone with the other workers because the boys, who stayed up late and made noise the night before, didn't wake up for breakfast. When she went to check if she could come in to clean the rooms she discovered that the four slept together in Potter's room, and the guest rooms didn't need cleaning at all, just a light arrangement of the carpets and beds.

So Lily managed to spend the day being as little time as possible around the Marauders. While she was busy with her errands they spent the day outside, and after dinner they shut themselves up in Potter's room again.

After nightfall Lily curled up in front of the fireplace in the sitting room with a book, while Madeleine, who never went to Hogwarts, practiced spells with a Charms book Lily lent her, and Mrs. Chambers quietly knitted a scarf for her granddaughter.

It was late when Lily started to yawn. Outside rain fell in serenity, making her feel sleepy. She was just about to wish the other women a good night when the front door slammed hard on the lower floor, startling the three. The sound of Maxwell's heavy boots was heard on the stairs, and after a moment he burst into the sitting room, dragging another man from his coat. Lily was shocked to see him, jumping to her feet at the sight of his pale face.

"Severus?" She said, not believing her eyes. He looked at her from behind the wet strands of dark hair that fell on his face. His black eyes burned under his thick black brows, proud and wild at the same time – so typical of her childhood friend.

"I found this fella hanging around outside the gate, looking for a way around the defenses," Maxwell muttered, shaking Severus from the collar of his coat with extraordinary force for his older age.

"Miss Evans, do you know this boy?" Mrs. Chambers asked in confusion.

"Yes, he – " Lily didn't know how to define her relationship with Severus these days. "We go to school together. Severus, what are you doing here?"

Severus made an effort to shake off the gardener's grip, but he didn't let go. "I'm looking for you," he replied when he realized that he wouldn't be able to break free, staring at Maxwell with hatred. "Your sister sent me."

"Petunia?" Lily's stomach turned with a painful stab. "Is it my father? Has something happened to him?"

"No, no," Severus replied in a much gentler voice, now looking only at Lily. "It's alright, it's something else."

Slightly calmer, Lily turned to Maxwell, "He doesn't mean harm. Just let me talk to him, please?"

For a moment she expected him to refuse, but at last he mumbled something and released Severus, who straightened his worn coat with hurt pride. Lily quickly cast a drying spell on him and took his thin arm, seated him in a nearby sofa and sat down next to him expectantly. Mrs. Chambers said something about "informing the Master", but Lily wasn't listening. Petunia hated Severus very much; The news must have been very important if she had asked him to deliver Lily a message.

"Don't worry, it's not bad news," Severus reassured her. He had always had the extraordinary talent to read her expressions with accuracy, an ability he shared only with her late mother. "She's getting married. She asked me to give you the invitation."

From the pocket of his coat he took out an envelope that remained dry despite the rain. Lily felt immediate relief that these weren't bad news, but the feeling immediately changed into confusion and uncertainty. When did Petunia meet someone? When had she decided to get married? And what would happen to their father when she married? Would he live with her and her husband?

She opened the envelope almost roughly, revealing an invitation covered in utter distaste with golden and silver ornaments. Impressive letters proclaimed: 'You have been invited to the wedding of Mr. Vernon Dursley and Miss Petunia Evans'.

Lily had never heard the name of the man her sister was about to marry. A sense of worry began to rise in her. Why is Petunia doing this? Does she lobe this Dursley? How long does she know him? She was about to question Severus about the faceless groom when Potter burst validly into the sitting room, accompanied by Madeline.

Severus got to his feet with a leaping, tense like a threatened cat. "What is he doing here?" He demanded in an icy voice.

"I live here," Potter replied in the same tone, a dangerous expression on his face. He looked at Lily, who was also on her feet. "What's he doing here, Evans?"

"He just passed me a letter from my sister," she replied defensively, holding the wedding invitation in front of her chest. "She's a Muggle, she can't find me here."

Severus looked at her, betrayed. "You're with him now? you said you hated him!"

The shame struck Lily like a blow to the face. She didn't know what was worse, the fact that he implied she was in a relationship with Potter or that he had declared, in front of all of Potter's house- workers, that she hated him. Burning tears filled her eyes. Painfully, she remembered why she had stopped being Severus' friend.

She wanted to shout at him, but instead she said in a cold, measured voice, "I work for him. Don't you dare judge me, Severus, you know how much I need the money."

"It's time to go, Snivellus," Potter said behind him.

There was a clear twitch in Severus's face at the mention of the insulting nickname. His voice trembled with rage as he spoke, "Speak politely, Potter, you wouldn't want me to start talking..."

Potter smiled a frighteningly calm smile. Lily expected him to curse Severus as he used to do at school, but to her surprise he only folded his arms confidently. "Maxwell, if you could show Snape the door, please."

Maxwell tried to grab Severus's coat again, but he slipped away and cursed the gardener. Maxwell blocked the curse with surprising skill.

"Severus, just go," Lily interjected in a desperate voice, seeing that things were going to get out of control.

Severus turned his wrath at her. "How can you serve him?!" He cried. "You know what he is!"

His words cut Lily's stomach from within. She knew how much suffering Potter had caused him, a suffering she, as his friend, couldn't restrain. But many things have changed since their first year at Hogwarts. She couldn't ignore Severus' sins anymore.

She looked down, unable to see her former friend's betrayed gaze, a friend with whom she had spent years of teasing and loneliness. "I need the money," She repeated her previous words like a mantra.

Severus called he a repulsive name. Mrs. Chambers made an appalled sound. Before Lily could even react Potter grabed him violently and pushed him against the wall. Severus' thin body tumbled to the floor. Lily retreated with a leap, as if the pain of the injury had shaken her own bones. A combination of fear and disgust filled her mouth with a bitter taste. Potter violently lifted and dragged him out of the sitting room in thunderous silence.

Lily didn't wait for the others' reaction, or see their pitiful looks. Clutching the invitation she ran to her room without a word. Only after she slammed the door behind her, knowing she was alone in her moonlit room, she allowed herself to cry.

She cried for the humiliation that Severus had caused her, their lost friendship, that her sister was getting married and had never even mentioned her future husband to her. She cried because they barely spoke anymore, because they were no longer friends. And most of all, because she came so realize that the two boys she had decided to forgive hadn't changed at all. Severus was still bitter and hateful, Potter was still a cruel bully.

She has always been taught to turn the other cheek, but what was she supposed to do when hurt the second time? Her parents never taught her what to do then.

A wave of loneliness shattered her heart and drowned it. The pain was almost physical. She loved solitude, even as a child; but no one had told her that as she would grow up the loneliness would hurt her more and more, until she would feel that her heart was about to disintegrate under the cracks that the disappointments and infidelities plowed through it. Petunia, who had turned her back on her after their mother had passed away and Lily had been invited to study at Hogwarts. Severus, so desperate to impress the other Slytherins that he was willing to spit in her face, his only friend.

The wedding invitation was already soaked with tears when a knock on the door startled her.

"Evans?" Potter's voice was heard from the other side. "You alright?"

Lily didn't answer, just pulled herself to the bed and lay down in her clothes.

"Don't listen to that greasy git," Potter went on, not knowing he was only making things worse. "I threw him out, he won't come back." When Lily still didn't make a sound, he asked, "Can I come in?"

She did not respond, and he didn't try to come in.

"Look ..." He went on after a few moments. "I know I was horrible at school. I was cruel to Snape, and to you, too, because you were his friend. I think I did it to get your attention. It bothered me that you didn't think I was anything special like the other girls. Snape paid the price, it's true, but you know he did some terrible things, too... He... Well, it doesn't matter now. I just want you to know I'm sorry for everything. I don't think I ever told you that. So I'm sorry."

Lily's tears dried up, and now she allowed Potter's muted voice to keep the thoughts from her exhausted mind until she fell asleep.

"And if you need anything at all, I want you to know you can come to me," he went on talking. "Even for money. I don't mind, my parents left me more than enough. I don't want you to live here just because you need the money, so if you want to go home I'll give you all your pay until the end of the summer and you could leave. I just want you to be happy... "

Lily was already asleep. In her slumber she heard him say, "I'll stop bothering you now. Sleep well. Tomorrow's a new day."