Epilogue

Lily and James were sent to Hogwarts that night, and didn't leave the castle until the end of the summer. James was bedridden in the infirmary until school started – the school nurse said it was a miracle that he was able to walk at all after what had happened, and that he might not be able to play Quidditch that season. But he didn't care about Quidditch anymore, and that broke Lily's heart.

She wouldn't leave him for a moment. She sat by his bed all day, though they hardly spoke. Lily felt that the pain would never go away. James sank into depression; None of his household workers had survived, and he blamed only himself.

Lily wrote to his friends for him, because he didn't want to. The guilt threatened to destroy him. He wouldn't forgive himself for Madeline, Maxwell, and Mrs. Chambers, nor for agreeing to join Voldemort, even if he did it only to protect Lily. She begged Remus and Sirius to give her advice on how to help him, but they were just as perplexed as she was.

At first Madame Pomfrey objected to Lily sleeping with him in the infirmary, but oddly enough Professor McGonagall stood up for them and let them sleep in the same bed. Lily hadn't really been able to ever thank her for that.

The nights were the hardest. She couldn't stop seeing Voldemort's terrible face while he tortured James, his smug, sick smile as James limped towards him to recive the dark mark. But she drew strength from the thought of the woman who was made out of fire, and in her dreams she saw her looking at her with the face of her mother.

Dumbledore had no time to talk to them until the day the other students arrived. They were waiting for him in the Headmaster's office, dressed in school uniforms. The castle was silent but full of a buzzing tension, as if the stones themselves were full of anticipation for the arrival of the students who were just climbing into the carriages. Lily took James' hand, not caring that all the portraits of the previous Headmasters were looking at them. James gave her a comforting squeeze, and for the first time in two weeks he smiled at her.

Dumbledore walked in swiftly, apologizing for making them wait, and without any kind of courtesy gave each of them a Head Boy and Girl badge before taking his place behind his desk.

"Is this a joke?" James asked. Lily studied her badge sourly. A few months ago she would have glowed with joy and pride for winning it, but now she felt only emptiness.

"Not at all," Dumbledore replied seriously. "I expect you will use this authority to do good in this school. Times are darker than ever, and the school is never completely protected. I expect you to protect the younger students from Voldemort's influence and report directly to me about any suspicious events. Do not hesitate to use your cloak, James."

"Don't worry about it," James replied with a trace of smirk. He never hesitated to use the cloak, and Lily had the feeling that he had a few more tricks up his sleeve.

"So he's still alive?" She asked Dumbledore. She had prayed that Voldemort had been killed in the fire, even though she had been taught never to pray that someone else would get hurt.

"Judging by the behavior of his supporters, it seems so," Dumbledore replied sternly. "I'm sorry to tell you that most of the house has been burned down, James."

"I know," James replied without emotion. Alastor Moody, who surprised them with a visit when James was in the infermary, told them what had happened after they had been taken to Hogwarts. "But we saw the fire swallow him, no one could've survived that."

Dumbledore didn't respond, lowering his eyes to his folded fingers on the table. Lily knew that he knew something he wasn't telling them, but she honestly didn't want to know what he was hiding. She just wanted to leave everything that happened behind.

"Now, Professor McGonagall has told me there's something you want to tell me, James," Dumbledore changed the subject.

"Yeah," James said stably. Lily looked at him in confusion. "You should know that Voldemort offered me to join him. He threatened to kill Lily... so I agreed. I hardly hesitated. So I'll understand if you wouldn't want me in the Order anymore..."

"He won't do it again," Lily intervened before Dumbledore could respond.

"I would," James claimed. They didn't talk about what had happened until now. Lily had no idea he felt that way. "I would do it again, and I'd take the dark mark if it meant you'd be protected."

"No," Lily refused to accept it. She held James' hands, momentarily forgetting that Dumbledore was there. "You have to promise me that if it happens again you'll say no. I'd rather die than see you serve him."

"Lily –"

"I'm not afraid to die," she said, surprising herself with the soundness of her voice. "And I know you aren't either. And if you're afraid of losing me, don't – death is not the end."

James looked at her with glazed eyes. He looked as though he wanted to say something painful, but at the last moment he remembered that Dumbledore was there. The Headmaster was looking at them with a smile.

"I do not wish you to leave the Order," he said to James. "The fact that you agreed doesn't make you any less of a good man. You will be surprised, but that is the way Voldemort recruits most of his supporters. Despite all his wisdom and talents, he is unable to understand the most basic concept, love. So instead he uses fear."

He got up and went to the window, just as his huge Phoenix landed on the windowsill. The sight of the rare and spectacular bird always calmed Lily. Dumbledore stroked it's head, and the bird watched him with clever eyes.

"I do not know how you managed to get away from him – so far I have never heard of a wizard or a witch who has confronted Voldemort and lived. However, I do know that there is one force in the world that is stronger than any kind of magic or spell, stronger than the most terrible wizard, and that is the power of love."

Lily thought about the woman in the fire. She had no way to explain it, but she knew in her heart that it was true – that her mother had been there that night and protected her and James. The thought filled her with shinning hope and faith, and she knew that Dumbledore was right.

The feast was about to begin and Dumbledore dismissed them. He was supposed to be at the Great Hall too, but he just stood there, looking out the window into at night.

"Just one more thing," he called after them when they were at the door. "Lily, did you think about my request?"

Lily had completely forgotten about the request until that moment. But now it wasn't hard for her to decide at all, she knew what had to be done.

"I'll do it," She said.

Dumbledore looked at her compassionately and went back to observe the night sadly. Lily wanted to tell him that he didn't have to feel sorry for her, because she knew she was doing the right thing, and that Severus would understand it when the time comes.

"What did he ask you to do?" James asked her as they were on their way to the Great Hall.

"I'll tell you later," She replied, "You won't like it."

James didn't pressure her to tell him. Entwining his fingers with hers, he asked, "Did you mean what you said? That you believe there's life after death?"

"Yes," Lily replied without hesitation. "Would you believe me if I told you I know it was my mother there that night?"

James thought about the matter seriously. The marks of that night were still seen on him, and Lily was afraid that they would never really disappear.

"I think I do," He concluded. She was glad he thought so.

They walked on in silence. The silence had become familiar and comforting for them in the last two weeks. They reached the main staircase when James halted one step bellow her.

"I love you, you know that?" He said with uncompromising honesty, looking into her eyes.

A feeling of peace enveloped Lily as she looked into his eyes. Under all the pain and the guilt she could still see clearly the boy she fell in love with that summer.

"I love you, too," she replied. Only after their kiss had been interrupted by the rude sounds that Peeves made above them did she realize that this was the first time she had told him that.

They went down to the Entrance Hall, where the students passed on their way to the Great Hall, chatting with their friends and exchanging summer experiences. Lily felt that everyone were watching her; Dumbledore silenced what had happened in James' house, so she had to assume she was being stared at because of the Head Girl badge, or because she was holding hands with James Potter, her arch enemy.

There was a sharp whistle behind them, They turned to see Sirius, Remus And Peter walking toward them in their Gryffindor uniform. Lily had never thought she would feel that way, but it moved her to see the four of them reuniting, and the love and concern that James' friends had expressed for him almost without saying a word. She felt their warmth envelop her, and she laughed at their jokes, which soon started up again and replaced the somber glances.

When she felt someone looking at her she turned almost indiscriminately and saw Severus at the edge of the crowd, gaunt and somber in his Slytherin uniforms. He was perhaps the only one in the room except Lily and the Marauders who knew what had happened that night. Did he know that she and James faced Voldemort? Was there a slim chance that she would persuade him to turn back from his evil ways?

His eyes darted between her and James, whose arm rested lightly around her shoulders. The pain was visible and clear on Severus' face, as if it were physical. Lily produced a sad smile, though she wasn't sure if Severus could see it, and turned her back without remorse.