AN: Hi there! Oh look! I broke my own record of being late. Haha. Ha. Um... I'm so, so, so (x 10 times) sorry for this.
Okay, I'm late and I apologize. You've got me you little mysterious Guest. Please don't be mad at me! It's my birthday week. *insert confetti*
Anyway, this's a new chapter. It's probably not what you're waiting for. Hope I won't disappoint you all.
I tend to ramble less than usual whenever I'm late but this time I actually want to say more. You can skip this. It's okay. *whisper* I'll haunt you in your sleep. Haha. Kidding.
Thank you sabooian, you're an awesome English tutor. Never missed a lesson. That concerns me though. I don't want you to feel that you have to do this. I mean like you're afraid that I'll be sad if you don't review. It's okay if you don't want to. Really. And by the way, thank to you, dahliadaria said that my writing had lots of improvements. Almost die when I read it.
For Ramona Vic Flowers, you know, from what you love, I'll volunteer to be your fandom best friend. :))
For spemilylover10, I'm glad that you finally have an official account. It means you're in too deep in this fandom. :)) Congratulation!
I have a new French reader who actually tell me they're French. So alhenaprince, welcome to my journey. Hope you don't leave so soon. :) Ah wait, I would love to introduce you to one of my most favorite readers who happens to also be French. It's inesd, the first person who told me they're French. Also the first one pointed out my mistakes and always gives detailed reviews. Well, it would be so cool to know that somewhere in France there were two persons reading this and thinking of each other. Aww.
For shamika.grandberry, your Caps Lock gave me the impression that you were shouting. Haha. I love your idea of a do over honeymoon. :)
For SpemSpam, glad you love it. I hope so. Guess what? The wait is over! :)
For Guests, okay this's serious. It's so nice to know you're waiting for my pieces and have the urge to tell me you're waiting. I really appreciate it. Sometimes I don't know if this was one person or two or more but I give all of you my best thanks.
I had written a prequel for this story and updated it. No, it's not good but I want to mention it so I can feel less guilty for updating late. Well, it doesn't work. Damn!
Fine, fine. Enough with the rambling. Hope you have a nice time reading this. Thank you for always being the most amazing supporters I've ever had a chance to be with. Remember that somewhere on this Earth, there's a tiny little dreamer smiling when you smile.
You love Spemily and I love you.
Pretty Little Liars is not mine. If it's mine, you'll know. (Full of Spemily of course.)
I love you all.
Ali. Alison. Alison DiLaurentis. Try to repeat those words several times. Try it. You feel something? No? Well, I actually feel tired. If I had to repeat that name more than ten times, I would be sick already. And she's not even a friend of mine. Let's get back to our lovely coffee shop owner. Emily, on the other hand, had been in love with the icy blue eyes girl. But that wasn't all of it. Their relationship wasn't just ex – lovers. They had loved each other deeply. And suddenly one of them had changed plan.
Suddenly. Unexpectedly. Ruthlessly.
Emily had seemed to handle their first encounter after five years really well. Hadn't she? I meant she didn't show any sign that could tell they had ended the love train in an "absolutely not" good term. Absolutely not. If I was a stranger, I couldn't even tell there were "love train" between them. So… she was okay. Right?
Yes, is the wrong answer. You were fooled.
The Emily Fields we know is the girl with a big heart. She had given the actress most of it. Or all of it. The girl had ripped it out, put it in her baggage and taken it to Paris without Emily's permission. Of course Emily hadn't given up that easily. She had kept tracing Alison's foot in hope that one day they could get back to where they had left. She had been willing to forgive the actress as long as she had apologized or just given her a hug. That had been all she wanted. But Alison had refused that chance. Emily had had nothing that time. They had been both poor. Doesn't need to say more, Emily would be a burden for Alison's future. They could have had another solution though. But Alison believed she had to choose the quickest, least complicated one. Cutting off her burden. Also her love.
The dark brown eyes girl was clueless. She had no idea she was a burden for Alison. Love was all she needed. Love was all she thought Alison needed. After a long hopeless time, she had given up. That wasn't easy. Day by day, she kept asking herself what she had done wrong. Alison left. Emily herself must be the problem. So yeah, what had she done wrong?
The question haunting her mind.
What did I do?
The girl's name haunting her mind.
Alison, Alison, Alison.
Their memories haunting her mind.
How about forever?
The coffee shop owner had been a mess. The messiest mess. Fortunately, thanked to an angel named Hanna Marin, the one who loved her more than Emily herself, after a year and a half, the tanned girl's mind started to feel free from those things. It didn't bother her much like before. She even barely thought of it.
And now Alison was back. Those things were back, in Emily's mind, too.
No, she didn't have feeling for Alison. Not anymore. It was just her instinct. She hadn't brought it up for a really long time and the fact that her ex came to her and wanted to talk had pushed the button to open that hidden folder in her mind. It spurted out like water. It was bad. Really bad. Because our coffee shop owner was happy. She hadn't deal with sorrow since she had Spencer. And it struck her.
The girl went to bed with a heavy mind and heart.
Spencer woke up in the middle of the night. She felt hot all of a sudden. Not the kind of hot that you needed to go and take a shower. The kind that was like someone had set up a camp – fire on Spencer's bed. She opened her eyes, looking around to find where this uncomfortable feeling came from. It didn't took her long though. She soon figured out she was practically hugging a flame in her chest.
The writer sat up instantly, slightly shook Emily's shoulder to wake her up.
"Emily! Emily! Wake up!"
"Hmm?" The younger girl's voice heavily raised.
"Are you feeling okay? You're hot." Worriedly, Spencer asked, completely out of her sleepy zone.
Chuckling, the tanned girl responded like she was talking with someone in her dream.
"Hot? I believe you mean sexy."
"No, Emily. I meant you're having a fever." Spencer carefully placed her palm on her favorite person's cheek. "C'mon, can you open your eyes and look at me?"
The girl didn't react to Spencer's request.
"Emily?"
She also didn't answer Spencer anymore. She had drifted to her unconsciousness.
The light brown eyes girl hurry ran to her kitchen. She took out a thermometer and wetted a small towel then quickly got back to her patient. The towel was now folded and put nicely on Emily's forehead. After a while, Spencer read the number on her thermometer which was just taken out from the coffee shop owner's mouth.
39.
Okay, that was too high. What kind of information in your head that put you into this condition, Emily?
It was two in the morning and the writer knew well that her beloved best friends or her manager was way in deeply in their dreamlands. She couldn't ask for their help. The older girl managed to bring Emily to the hospital by herself. She started to change her clothes in a rush, put on a sweat pant for Emily and turned around to grab her keys. The sound of her hasty footsteps and the tinkle when Spencer picked up the keys gave Emily a vision in her delirium. A vision of someone was leaving.
As our incredible writer sat down and was about to lift the patient up, Emily unconsciously immediately held Spencer's hand, dragged it to her chest, pleaded.
"Please don't go! We can figure it out together. You don't have to leave, please!"
The light brown eyes girl froze in a short moment. She didn't reply to that. She didn't want to think about it to come up with a respond. She slightly had an idea that Emily wasn't talking to her. And answer that would give her a confirmation. She didn't want that. Emily's health was more important than anything right now. The writer swallowed her bitterness, her jealousy, her anger down her throat, trying once more time to approach Emily.
"Alison…"
Here come the confirmation.
The name left Spencer's wife lips without any hesitation. The younger girl's voice was so soft but somehow it hit Spencer harder than a hammer. Our poor writer was quickly weakened. Now she doubted that she could carry Emily to her car. The older girl was powerless. That was it. She didn't know Emily well enough. She was wrong. Emily had lied while she said she didn't have anything to do with Alison. Such a liar! When did she become that good of a liar? She was unconscious now. The things she said now were all mattered. And she was begging Alison not to leave. That meant deep down in her heart, there was still places for the actress. Where did she put Spencer then? Where did she put the one who now sharing the same bed with her then? Spencer couldn't believe it. She was betrayed. Again. Maybe Emily was just like Wren. Maybe Emily was just using her. The writer was extremely mad. But not at Emily though. She was mad at herself. She hated herself for not hating Emily. Knowing the fact that the tanned girl just betrayed her but she still had the thought that she had to get Emily to the hospital as soon as possible. She loved her so much that the only thing she could be angry at right now was her heart for choosing Emily.
Tears rolled down her cheeks uncontrollably. The older girl instantly covered her mouth to prevent any sobbing sound from escaping. Spencer tried to yank her hand away from the tanned girl's grip but Emily held it back tighter. Her lips moving to speak. The light brown eyes girl didn't want to hear it. What? Sitting right there and listening to the love of her life expressed her love to someone else but Spencer? No. Spencer totally didn't want that. She put more effort to take back her hand. She failed though. But that brought tears onto the coffee shop owner's face. She holding Spencer's hand with both of hers, sobbing in her delirious talk.
"…she's nothing. Really."
Oh, wow. So now she said Spencer was nothing. Unbelievable. I hate you, Emily. The incredible writer was exhausted. She now knew how powerful her love one's words could influence her. They easily kicked her to lay on the ground. And her Emily was crying. How could Emily be that dumb? She willingly begging someone who had left her to stay and absolutely ignoring the one who had never hurt her. This was nonsense. This was madness. Spencer was so done with all this. She wiped her tears with her free hand, stood up and was about to cut any tight with Emily. Literally. Then she noticed the white towel still placing on the girl's forehead. Emily was still sick. Spencer still cared. Her face was wetted with tears again. She kept standing there, didn't know what to do in this situation. Or in her life.
The dark brown eyes girl raised her voice once more time. Damn it, Emily. Hadn't you hurt her enough?
"Please, I'm begging you. Don't go. Please,…" The girl paused because of her sobbing. "Spencer, please! Don't!"
Wait, what? Okay, I'm surprised as much as you are. The writer's eyes widened. She looking back at her favorite person who now was still clinging at her hand, refused to let it go. As Spencer sat back next to where Emily was laying, the younger girl immediately released her hold on Spencer's hand, wrapped both her arms around the writer's neck, hugging her tightly. Her fever didn't get any better with all this crying because of the vision in her head.
"I meant it, Spencer. Alison, she's nothing. I don't love her. Not anymore. Please don't go! You're the one I love! Please, Spencer, please!"
Remember I said I hated Emily? I take that back. Sorry, Emily. Apparently, Spencer had misunderstood what her favorite person said. The coming back of the actress brought so many thoughts to our lovely coffee shop owner's mind. So many thoughts. And memories. If that was all, Emily wouldn't be sick. She was worried though. She had been so loved by Alison. Yet, the girl had left. Now she was loved by Spencer. Was there any chance that that horrible incident could happen again? Emily didn't know. But if that did happen, this time, it would really be her fault. Emily herself would be the reason if the icy blue eyes girl wanted to step into the picture. It would be because of her. She couldn't get away with the thought being the one who crushed her own happiness. She couldn't get away with the thought she couldn't keep Spencer.
She had gone to her dreamland by these imaginaries. They slowly recreated those images in her dream and eventually bringing her biggest scare of being forsaken up which cause her this fever. Yes, worrying too much might take you down, physically. And well, Spencer wasn't the only one who was weakened by love. Emily was also a victim. The fever won. But the writer had accidentally made it worse. Her rashly footsteps and tinkling keys in our world meant they were going to the hospital but in Emily's nightmare, it meant Spencer was leaving her. Her biggest scare was created lively in her dream with the help of this fever. It was so real that Emily believed the light brown eyes girl was actually walking out of her life. Forever.
So she begged her to stay.
It was just that the arrangement of her sentences gave Spencer the wrong idea and gave me a tiny heart attack. Maybe she shouldn't be sick again. It cost so many emotional damages.
"I believe you, Emily. I'm not going anywhere. I'm going to stay with you. I am."
The older girl tightened their hug but she soon realized her favorite person needed some rests. The hospital faded away in her mind. She didn't want to make any movement that could give Emily the idea being left again. Spencer gently laid Emily down to her pillow, linked their fingers together to make sure Emily know she would stay by her side. The towel was fixed its position on the patient's forehead after Emily had laid down. Our writer checked her temperature once more time.
38.5.
Maybe hearing Spencer's comfort words and receiving her guarantee gesture were even better than using any medicine. But the light brown eyes girl knew that her wife needed to take some of them to make this terrible fever go away faster. Yet she had to wait though. Wait until Emily had completely had a new dream, a better dream. A dream which she had a happy ending, of course, with Spencer. A dream where she lived happily ever after, of course, also with Spencer. A dream where she would never be left, by anyone, especially by Spencer. The older girl didn't know when that dream would take shape in the younger girl's head and she needed time to prepare soup and pills for her girl. Spencer settled to quicken the process of that beautiful dream. She raised her hand which was linked with Emily's to her chest, lowered herself to place a kiss on her favorite person's closing eyes. She didn't pull away right after that though. Her lips found Emily's ear, lovingly whispered.
"You are loved, Emily."
While her beautiful wife was finding her way in some new dreams, Spencer trying to reduce the girl's temperature. She had thought of calling her private doctor but the fact that this was three in the morning made the light brown eyes girl cannot find it in her heart to disturb his sleep. Besides, she had a strong confidence that she could do it by herself. After all, she was Spencer Hastings. Spencer Hastings could do anything. So, well, she started her new position as a doctor.
A doctor that needed to google stuffs. She typed.
"How to reduce a fever."
A long list of results appeared on the screen. She clicked one of them.
Let's see…
Sponge down… Okay, already did.
Lower the room temperature.… Done.
Remove layers of clothing… Well, I would love to do that.
Take a fever reducing medication…. Medicine. Okay I have this.
Remember the patient needs to eat first. Soup will be the best choice… Soup? Chicken soup? Maybe that.
The light brown eyes girl brought her iPad to the kitchen, typing again before taking out all of the ingredients.
"How to make chicken soup."
A wide grin formed on Spencer's lips. She had good feelings about this. The recipe was too easy for someone who had never cooked a meal in her life. Yupe, never. She got all the ingredients in her fridge though. All of them. She even had a whole chicken in it. And she began. She also began the conversation between her and the iPad. Or the chicken.
"Rinse chicken thoroughly."
Too easy.
"Check the internal cavity."
Gross but yeah, still easy.
"Trim excess fat."
Not sure if doing this is right but well, nailed it.
"Remove the legs."
Uhm… How?
"Remove the wings."
How can you place your knife there?
"Cut up the breast."
Wait, where did the chicken's legs and wings go?
Looking back at the chicken in her hands, Spencer barely recognized it anymore. With all the amateur slices and chops, her piece of chicken now looked like a bunch of minced – meat… with bones. Okay, don't be sick when you're with Spencer. Our incredible writer slightly got mad. She hated it when she didn't know something. She hated it when she wasn't good at something. Trying to calm herself, Spencer read the next step in hope it could help her figure out how to deal with the mess in her hands.
"Place chicken pieces in a large stock pot."
"Fuck you! I haven't even cut the chicken into pieces yet." Frustrated, the light brown eyes girl yelled, threw the unlucky chicken back on her chopping – board, sat flat on the ground. Spencer was obviously not a type of a patient person.
Spencer, dear. That was not a nice thing to say to something Emily was going to eat. Oh, Emily. She was doing it for Emily. The patient with a really serious fever was waiting for her. Sighing, the light brown eyes girl wiped the sweats on her forehead with the back of her hand, put aside her frustration, stood up.
Spencer put more attention to the recipe. Her Emily needed this.
And the rest, was history.
Okay, I'm kidding. She still struggling with her chicken soup but she actually finally finished it.
Let's get someone to taste it. We need someone that could give us an objective review. How about Emily? She seems to be a good choice. We all know how objective she could be. Especially when it comes to Spencer. Yupe, let's get her.
Okay, I'm kidding again. There was no way Spencer could give anyone but Emily that soup.
The writer ladled enough soup out into a bowl and placed it on a tray with fever reducing medicines. She quietly walked in their bedroom and sat right beside Emily.
"Em! Hey! You need to take this. C'mon!"
Emily stirring but gave no attempt to wake up and do as was told. The light brown eyes girl had to raise the girl up and let Emily lean on her shoulder. Her left hand wrapped around Emily to steady her while her right hand bringing the bowl of soup up to Emily's lips. The coffee shop owner was too tired to know what was going on and Spencer had to do most of the jobs. It took the older girl a while to make her wife drink the soup. Such a disappointment! I was waiting for Emily's review on Spencer's cooking skill. Ugh.
Spencer put on a release smile after Emily obediently took all the pills that the older girl had pulverized on purpose so that her girl could swallow them easily. She let Emily relax back to her comfort zone whilst she cleaning and preparing a big glass of water for the younger girl whenever she woke up. Finished everything, Spencer returned to their bed. She laid on the spot which had a safety distance with the tanned girl. Her own body's heat might affect Emily's recover. Glancing over at her favorite person, our incredible writer smiled. Emily seemed to have a nicer dream. Her frown had gone. Her tears had faded. Yeah, definitely a nicer dream.
The older girl blinked. A small thought found its way to her mind. She suddenly hated Alison so much. Though without Alison's decision, Emily wouldn't be hers, she still hated the actress. Now Spencer understood how Hanna had been feeling all those years. The icy blue eyes girl had turned her best friend into an insecure person. It brought so many impacts. Emily was even scared when she had happiness because she had to be worried when it would end. Emily was also afraid to put so much trusts in someone because anyone could be the one who might betray her. Hanna was right. Alison had destroyed Emily. Spencer felt it now. And her hatred was burning in her heart. She would do something to that girl but not now. She needed to cool down a little. She already felt tired with the night. Or the soup. Or the patient. Or the misunderstanding delirious talk.
She needed to cool down.
The girl reached out for her iPad. This could be her new habit.
Playing game? Surfing the internet? Listening to music?
Nope, she just wanted to replay her good memories. Till this day, Spencer still secretly thanking her old self for picking Paris and taking so many photos there. Of course, Emily's photos were Spencer's favorites. Smiling with one picture, Spencer slid right to reveal another one and never forgot to smile at it.
Smiling and sliding. Smiling and sliding. The light brown eyes girl easily got the ticket to her dreamland.
A beautiful dreamland though. Probably the same place with Emily's. Probably.
The birds were cheeping on the other side of the window. They were so loud that it woke the patient up. Emily slowly opened her eyes, in a moment, she had no memories about anything. Then the last thing she could remember about last night came up. She knew Spencer had woken her up at midnight. She knew she had a fever. What else? Oh, she recalled Spencer leaving her.
Wait.
The coffee shop owner's heart skipped a beat. She instantly looked around, hoping it was just a nightmare. And it really was just a nightmare. The writer was sleeping peacefully not so far from her. Her beautiful face was facing where Emily had laid. The sound of Spencer's breathing calmed Emily's insecure heart. A small grin crept onto her lips. This reminded her of their first time sharing bed. Well, their first time unwilling sharing bed because of Spencer's fear of zombies. The tanned girl even remembered what had she said that time.
"You're cute when you sleep."
It had a small difference that Spencer didn't tease her this time. The light brown eyes girl probably was taking Emily to Paris right now in her dream. That didn't bother Emily though. She loved it. Both times. Whether Spencer answered or not, she didn't mind. As long as Spencer was still here, by her side, Emily would assume that she was the happiest girl in the world. Just breathing the same air with her could made Emily feel so safe. The younger girl couldn't help it. She laid on Spencer's opened arm, snuggling closer to her neck while wrapped both arms tightly around her, making the older girl's body her shelter. She kept eliminating any micrometer left if there was any which I strongly believe there was not. It was never close enough for Emily whenever she wanted to cuddle with Spencer. Never. The consequence came right after that. Spencer spoke out, choking on her words.
"Em…mily, I… I can't breathe."
"Oh, sorry. Sorry. I'll stop. Here, let's me give you some space."
The younger girl was nervous, afraid that she might hurt Spencer. As she was speaking, the girl was about to move and leave a small distance. Spencer held back immediately, looking down at her favorite person, beaming slyly.
"I didn't say I wanted you to stop, did I?"
The coffee shop owner stopped moving, blushed. It was a rule now. Spencer shifted her head and connected their lips together. Her palm found Emily's forehead after they had pulled back. Spencer's voice was full of concerns.
"Your fever seems to be getting away. You feel any better? Is there any part on your body that hurts? How about your head? You don't have a headache, do you?"
There was a long list of questions but Emily didn't intend to answer any of that. Her eyes longingly locked with Spencer's. Her heart beating faster with the long silence she left after hearing Spencer's words. She didn't break the silence though. In fact, she was going to make it last a little longer. The dark brown eyes girl moved up a bit, connected their lips again and deepened the kiss in Spencer's surprise. But Spencer's brain was fast, she reciprocated in a quarter heartbeat. Yupe, a heartbeat was too long. The kiss could lead to something interesting though. Yet, the writer remembered Emily was still recovering with that dang fever. Spencer slowly separated them, she didn't have full trust on herself in this. Smiling like a kid, the light brown eyes girl asked.
"What was that for?"
Our lovely coffee shop owner smiled, she barely answered anything this morning.
Thank you, for staying with me.
"Nothing." Emily's playing dumb face was put on.
Knowing the writer was about to ask more because she was narrowing her eyes and her lips slightly opened, Emily jumped in.
"I'm hungry."
It worked. Spencer jumped out of the bed right away. The older girl didn't forget to pause at the door for a moment with a pretty proud face.
"I made you chicken soup. Wait a moment. I'll be right back."
"Wait! You what?"
"Be right back." Spencer shouted through the walls.
After the soup was reheated, our incredible writer brought it to Emily. Of course she also brought her proud face. Never forgot. The coffee shop owner looking at her bowl suspiciously, quietly raised her voice.
"You never touched a raw chicken."
"Yes."
"You never cooked."
"Yes."
"No one had ever eaten your food."
"No."
"What? Who? When? Where? How?"
"Someone has eaten my food. You. Last night. On this bed. I fed you." Spencer let it out in one breath, continued. "And stop talking. You're hungry. C'mon. Eat it. You have pills to take after this."
Emily carefully smelled her soup once more time. I'm not sure what the purpose of that was. As her favorite person tasting her first spoon, Spencer's face was covered with hope. Her eyes brightened when she didn't see Emily furrowed her eyebrows. The writer questioned nervously.
"How does it taste?"
Okay, I've been waiting for this moment. Putting back the bowl to her lap, raising her eyebrow, Emily questioned back with a playful tone.
"So, what do you want to hear? Truth? Or truth with the fact that I love you?"
Thinking for seconds, the light brown eyes girl looked up, narrowing her eyes.
"I want both. Let's hear the truth first."
"Well, chicken soup, you say? I barely tasted chicken. Or soup. It's really ba…"
"Okay, okay. I hear enough of truth. Give me the next one." Spencer cut her off, obviously didn't like to take bad comment.
"You have terrible cooking skill. Are you sure you had put chicken into this?" Emily replied, didn't miss a beat.
"This is what you meant the truth with the fact that you love me? Seriously?"
"What? I love you so I said the ugly truth. It might be ugly but at least it was still the truth. I don't want to lie to you." Spencer didn't respond. She was too busy putting on her grumpy face. And Emily saw that. She knew she should complete her whole sentence. "Besides, though it's totally, absolutely, completely the opposite of delicious, I still love to eat it anyway. All of it."
Finished her talk, the coffee shop owner started her process to also finish Spencer's soup. She wanted to let Spencer know she meant it when she said she loved to eat it. Or when she said she loved Spencer. Lie was her worst option and she believed she would never have to lie in this relationship. She believed that. On the other hand, the older girl was biting back her grin. She shouldn't grin. She was playing mad.
Well, she failed. It was so hard to be mad at Emily. Even just pretending.
Spencer gave her favorite person all the pills while she taking the tray back to her kitchen. She returned with another wet towel to wipe Emily's face. The younger girl probably didn't realize she had been crying couple hours ago. With everything was tidy and clean, the light brown eyes girl climbed on their bed, replaying their position before Emily had said she had been hungry. As a habit, the tanned girl continued tightened her arms around Spencer's hips, closing their bodies as much as she could. It reminded Spencer of what had happened last night. Emily was insecure. Spencer turned, placed a kiss on her wife's cheek, whispered.
"I love you."
"I love you more."
"I love you most."
"Seriously? You have to turn this into a competition?"
"What? You started it. I just said I love you."
"But you still felt the need to say you love me most."
"Because I do. I love you most."
"No, you're not allowed to love me most. I am. I love you most."
"Emily, sweetie. Nobody is more competitive than me. You really want to win this?"
There was silence. The coffee shop owner snuggled back to Spencer's neck, mumbling.
"Fine! You win."
I heard someone said that the person who loses in "I love you more" game is actually the one who wins it. Could that thing fix on our couple? Like did Emily love Spencer more than Spencer loved her? I'm not sure. But one thing I'm sure is that if Alison had any plan, she obviously would have to work really, really hard to complete it.
AN: Tell me what you think?