4ABY: Chandrila

It was the evening of Bodhi and Sarli's wedding. The ceremony had been short and sweet, and the reception that followed carried on well into the afternoon and late evening. The party was outside under the lantern lit trees while the waves from the ocean could be heard under the music. Jyn sat at one of the now empty tables with Kalei, who was mesmerised by the small lanterns weaving through the trees. Cassian was standing with Han, both drinking socially while they watched Tonc, Rostok and Basteren dance drunkenly in front of the musicians. Jyn chuckled to herself as she stood and made her way over to her husband.

"Ah, the original bride," Han slurred. He slapped Cassian on the back. "I liked your wedding; very... to the point and none of this..." He waved his arms, "this pointless stuff."

Cassian smiled warmly at Jyn who struggled not to laugh. He snaked his arm around Jyn's waist and kissed her behind the ear. Kalei was still observing the lights around them when her father ran a finger down her cheek. She blinked, faced her father and smiled for the first time. She gurgled happily as her parents beamed down at her before turning back to the lights.

"She smiled!" Jyn exclaimed.

Cassian grinned. "She's growing up so fast."

Kalei kicked her legs as she was handed over to her father who tickled her stomach to make her smile again. Han peered over Cassian's shoulder. "Poor kid looks like you when she smiles."

Jyn hid a grin as Cassian threw shade in Han's direction.

"Jyn!" Tonc stumbled over to them, drunkenly smiling. "Come dance!"

"Oh," Jyn laughed lightly, "I'm not sure; you'll have to ask Cassian for permission."

It was a joke and Cassian rolled his eyes. "Tonc, good luck trying to get her to dance; she hates it."

It was partially true, but mostly due to the fact she never had much practice growing up.

"Oh, come on," Tonc pleaded, "I'll teach you."

Jyn glared at Cassian as she was dragged over to where the other's danced. Kalei continued to kick her legs as Cassian cradled her.

"Active little thing isn't she," Han remarked, taking a swig of whisky.

Cassian tightened his grip on his daughter and shrugged. "She slept most of the afternoon, so I doubt we'll get much sleep again tonight."

Han chuckled. "I heard her last night when I got in. Kid's got a strong voice."

Cassian hummed with agreement.

Kalei fell asleep just as her parents left the party. Jyn believed the excitement and noise must have worn her out; neither parent complained. Cassian placed his daughter gently in her bassinet and then tenderly pushed Jyn down onto the bed. He let his hand roam down her side while he kissed more intensely than he initially planned. He sat up on his knees to remove Jyn's shoes and to admire her. At first, Jyn readily accepted him, going as far as removing his clothes except his briefs. Suddenly, she paused, gently pushing against Cassian's chest.

"We shouldn't," she murmured.

Still hazy from the alcohol, Cassian frowned to focus. "What's wrong?"

"I'm not... comfortable," she replied. "I don't feel ready yet."

Cassian sighed, resting his forehead against hers. "I understand."

Jyn wrapped her arms tightly around his shoulders and leant up to kiss her husband. "I want to, but... can we wait until we get home?" They were to return home in two days.

Cassian smiled softly at Jyn's pleading eyes. He could never refuse her anything. "Of course. Probably a good idea anyway." He rolled off her and stretched.

Jyn rolled into his side, resting her head on his shoulder. "Why?"

"I drank too much," he murmured as his eyes drooped. "You would have been disappointed... like the last time I came to you drunk."

Jyn giggled at the memory. "I wasn't disappointed. Just... taken by surprise."

"I don't want to think about it."

Jyn sighed happily, running her fingers across his chest. "Sleep."

...

0ABY: Delta Base

Jyn was sharing quarters with three other rebel females in a narrow room crammed with two sets of bunks. She had arrived at Delta Base with Cassian three weeks ago and had been grounded while Cassian was sent out to Coruscant for a recon intel assignment. She had finally learned the extent of her actions back on Commenor: the death of Kavis and an imperial spy. Their deaths had resulted in the empire shutting down all their research on Commenor. Arhul Nemo had sent a message for Jyn, apologising for what had happened and hoped to see her again one day. Out of all that, the most important news Jyn heard was that she did not contaminate anyone in the city while she made her way back to Arhul Nemo. It was something that had been playing on her mind while she remained bedridden on Folor Base.

Sefla, Tonc, Rostok and Basteren were also on Delta Base, but Jyn had only seen them briefly after she first arrived. They had all embraced her, glad to see she was back on her feet. General Willard soon arrived and told Jyn that the men were currently undergoing intelligence training on the other side of the base. Tonc had quietly remarked to her that it was mostly boring classroom work with the occasional field trip out in the bushland.

"Rogue One will be commissioned once more after I am satisfied the events of Commenor will not happen again," Draven said to Jyn. "Major Andor has expressed his keenness to keep you all together, but has agreed that such training is necessary."

"And me?" Jyn asked.

"Major Andor will mentor you out in the field."

"When will that actually happen?"

Draven gestured for her to follow him into the small command centre. "Ever since the Battle of Yavin, the alliance has embarked on a rather ambitious offensive since our formation. Hundreds, if not thousands of our ships have slowly pushed their way into the midrim gaining a substantial amount of ground."

They arrived at command and Draven handed her a datapad that highlighted the areas of the midrim currently under alliance control.

"Unfortunately our gamble has only worked to a certain point," Draven continued. "Our navy has become overextended and Alliance High Command has ordered a halt to our advances in the midrim. We are now to retreat back into the outer rim."

Jyn looked up from the datapad. "So we've lost?"

"We're retreating before we do lose," Draven replied assertively. "When Major Andor returns you will accompany him to Bamayar to assist with the evacuation of rebel forces."

Jyn raised a brow. "You're sending an intelligence agent to help with evacuation?"

Draven smirked. "You're learning. No, Major Andor has a side mission that requires him to ensure sensitive information concerning alliance intelligence does not fall into enemy hands. I trust only him to accomplish this task."

"What sensitive information?" Jyn asked.

"The rebel base on Bamayar is in Ducal Palace where for a number of months have acted as a temporary intelligence command set up in the midrim to assist with the invasion. If the empire gets hold of that information they'll gain access to all the profiles of rebel spies, including yours."

Jyn stared back at the map of the midrim. "When is Cass... Major Andor to return?"

"In the next few days."

Those few days turned into five days before Cassian returned, already speaking with Draven, as they walked through the hanger, on his next assignment with Jyn.

Jyn was sitting down in the holding cells where Shaden was still being kept. She had a tray of food that was her lunch with additional extras for Shaden to eat. It had become routine for Jyn to come down and eat with Shaden during lunch when she had no one else to talk to. It wasn't easy sharing food with Shaden; she sat on the cold floor on the outside of the cell while Shaden sat on the floor across from her in his cell. They talked of small matters at first; Jyn eventually opened up on the events of Commenor, and the questions Willard and Draven hounded Shaden with.

"You are to be released," Jyn said casually.

"What? Really?" Shaden asked.

Jyn nodded. "General Willard does not believe you are of any further help to the rebellion and is convinced you are no longer a threat."

Shaden's mouth remained ajar. "When am I to be released?"

"They are planning on sending several transport ships to help with the midrim retreat. You will be put on one of those transports and left at the nearest spaceport with substantial funds for a single flight to wherever you want to go."

"I have you to thank for this, don't I?"

Jyn half shrugged. "I didn't convince General Willard, only pushed the topic."

"Thank you, Jyn."

"So where will you go?" Jyn asked, taking a bite of her lunch.

"Home," Shaden said straightaway. "I'm going home."

"Which is?"

"Aria Prime," Shaden replied. "I'll go stay with my sister until I find work."

"Honest work, I hope."

Shaden laughed lightly. "It would be a first for me, but yes."

"I wish you luck."

...

9BBY

When Jyn got her period for the first time she thought something terrible was wrong. Her life with Saw had been fast paced with little education in the short moments they were offered respite. But none of the education Saw had taught her concerned womanly functions. The previous day, Jyn had been victim to sharp pains in her stomach that she passed off from the food she had eaten for breakfast. Then the nausea from the pain came and was followed by vomiting. Saw had taken her off that afternoon's training and insisted she lay down and rest.

Waking up the next morning to blood between her legs caused Jyn to gasp and use the sheet to wipe it away. Jyn glared over to where Kenna was still sleeping and immediately assumed her friend had played a prank on her. But the blood kept coming and the cramps started up again. Jyn cried into her pillow and she hugged her knees, unsure what to do. How could she tell Saw she was bleeding from between her legs? It was all... well... embarrassing for her.

From the other side of the room, Jyn heard Kenna sigh dramatically. "Why are you crying?"

Jyn hugged her knees tighter. "I'm bleeding."

Kenna moved from her bed to Jyn's, forcing her to roll over. "Show me."

Jyn sat up and pushed the sheet and blankets down to the foot of the bed. "I don't know how it happened."

Kenna sat up on her knees, arms folded with a frown etching between her brows. "That's a lot of blood."

"It's coming from..." Jyn pointed with her finger and Kenna pulled the blood soaked sheet up to cover Jyn.

"Wait here."

What felt like an eternity was only ten short minutes that had Kenna returning with one of Saw's female insurgents. Her name was Bab and she had been kind and instructive to Kenna and Jyn in the past.

"Kenna said you are bleeding," Bab said as gently as she could. "From what she described, it sounds like you started your period."

"What?" Jyn muttered as she hugged her lower abdomen.

Bab stared at both girls. "Has anyone told you about periods?"

Kenna and Jyn frowned when they looked at each other and both shook their heads. Bab sighed, realising the extent of the situation.

"What you are going through is very normal," Bab began.

"How is this normal?" Jyn asked, glaring.

"All women get periods; once they start you will keep getting them every month."

"Every month?" Kenna exclaimed. "Why?"

"It has to do with... the parts of the woman's body that makes a baby – ah... the womb. If you don't get pregnant then you bleed every month."

"So Jyn has to get pregnant to stop bleeding?" Kenna asked, brow raised.

"Oh, no!" Bab replied quickly. "Jyn is far too young to have a baby, but you are at the right age to start bleeding."

"I don't want to bleed! It hurts!" Jyn groaned.

"I'm afraid it's a nuisance all women must endure," Bab said sadly.

"So... when will I start bleeding?" Kenna asked apprehensively.

"Soon, no doubt," Bab answered. "Jyn, the pain will subside as will the bleeding. It lasts no more than a week and everything will be back to normal."

"Until it happens again," Jyn murmured to herself.

"I have some supplies to help with the bleeding; I'll go get them." Bab made for the door. "Kenna, go fetch a bucket of hot water so we can clean up Jyn, and make sure to find a rag we can soak in the hot water."

"What for?" Kenna asked, following.

"Heat helps soothe the cramps Jyn is feeling. Until we get more supplies, we'll have to make do."

It was the day Jyn had felt most humiliated as Bab and Kenna helped wash away the blood and dispose to the blood-soaked sheet and clothes. Bab had to help her insert the soft padding that would soak up the rest of the blood yet to come; Jyn had hated every second of it and couldn't believe the news when Bab said it would have to be changed before she went to bed that night. Supplies were short during their temporary stay on the planet and Bab stated she would take both girls out into the next city they arrived at so they knew where to buy such products.

Jyn was sitting on the window ledge, her legs swinging as she surveyed the barren land surrounding the small town they had taken refuge in. Bab had found a thick, woollen scarf she heated up and wrapped around Jyn's hips. The heat had helped and soon Jyn forgot all about the pain she had suffered that day. She heard someone enter the room and turned to see Saw approaching her. Bab had said she would mention Jyn's condition to Saw after Jyn blatantly expressed her horror of doing so herself.

"I hear today is a special day," Saw said, standing by Jyn, watching the horizon as the sun prepared to set.

"It doesn't feel special," Jyn murmured. She felt Saw gently place his large hand on her small shoulder.

"Today marks your transition into womanhood," Saw continued.

Jyn looked at him sceptically. "I can drink alcohol now?"

Saw chuckled. "Alas, no. You are still too young for that."

"Bab said it means I can have a baby now, but that I am still too young for that, which doesn't make sense."

"Today marks the beginning of what is to come. One day you may find yourself blessed with a child of your own. Today's events do not mark you for life; you do not have to procreate if you do not want to. Your life is your own, Jyn."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Saw sighed. "This is a topic usually discussed between mother and daughter; I never thought to inform you myself. I have instructed Bab to educate you and Kenna on womanly matters, so if you have any questions, you must ask her."

Jyn picked at the woollen scarf. "I don't want to have a baby."

Saw smiled sadly. "That is your decision to make."

...

0ABY: Bamayar, Midrim Retreat

The rebel outpost on Bamayar was in Ducal Palace. Jyn's main task was to ensure all personnel had been evacuated while Cassian worked with seizing any intel that could harm rebel intelligence. The journey from Delta Base had been quiet between the two of them. The sole exception was Cassian's teachings. He had said that if they were to be working together – just the two of them – then Jyn needed to learn how to co-pilot. It had been simple enough, however Cassian had not been confident in her skills to take full control of the U-Wing.

Jyn hummed as she read the list of names belonging to rebel personnel that needed to be evacuated. It was a grand total of three hundred and twenty four. They had brought in larger shuttles for the extraction and the entire palace was in a frenzy as rebels ran back and forth, loading equipment, gear and weapons. Cassian was somewhere inside and Jyn struggled at first to assign everyone a spot in the evacuation.

There was a loud boom overhead that sounded the entry of TIE fighters into the atmosphere. They were heading for the city which was still a decent way out from the palace. They had time. Jyn worked with several other officers to check off everyone on the list. The smaller shuttles were the first to leave, full of rebels and gear.

"Excuse me!"

Jyn swivelled at the sound of a middle-aged man running over to her, clutching his two young daughters.

Jyn managed a smile for the children. "Can I help you?"

"We need to leave," he said.

Jyn raised her hand. "What's your name?"

"Marcus," he replied, taking a steady breath. "Sorry. My name is Marcus and I was promised a spot for myself and my two girls on the evacuation."

Jyn brought up her list. "I don't see your name."

"I'm not alliance," Marcus stated. "I am a civilian, a native to Bamayar."

Jyn lowered her datapad. "Then why would you be promised a spot on a rebel evacuation shuttle."

"I helped the rebels when they first arrived," Marcus began. "There was an imperial occupation and I offered the rebels information on their movements so they could take the city. Please, the empire has returned and if they discover I aided the rebellion... please, my daughters. They will be killed!"

Jyn stared at the girls who cowered at their fathers words. They were young; no more than three and six.

"Wait here and I'll go speak with one of the pilots. I'm sure we can fit you in somewhere."

"Thank you," Marcus replied earnestly.

As Jyn walked over to the nearest shuttle, Cassian appeared, walking quickly down the steps of the palace towards the U-Wing they arrived on.

"Time to go," he said briskly.

"Not yet," Jyn replied. "I just need to do something. I'll meet you on board."

"Don't take too long," Cassian called. "Those TIE fighters will be heading this way shortly."

The last remaining shuttles were full to capacity and Jyn mentally cursed at the idea of bringing such news to a desperate man and father. She glanced over at the U-Wing and noticed only four rebels waiting for departure. She hurried over to find Cassian preparing the pre-flight check.

"Cassian," she said, hovering outside, "do we have space for three more?"

Cassian briefly glanced in her direction. "Yeah, why?"

"Three civilians were promised to be evacuated after helping the rebels," Jyn replied. "I'll go get them."

"Wait," Cassian said quickly. "Where are they? We don't have much time."

"There are literally right there," Jyn pointed to the three figures a hundred metres away.

"Okay, fine," he replied. "Hurry."

Naturally, everything went sideways. Two of the three remaining shuttles took off while the third was blasted by a TIE fighter as the squadron tore through the sky targeting the palace. The impact of the explosion threw Jyn off her feet and shook the U-Wing. Jyn groaned, clutching her chest as she struggled to breathe.

"Jyn!"

She could hear Cassian shouting her name as she got up and raced towards the family.

"Jyn! Get back here!"

She couldn't see far through the smoke and flames of the shuttle but she eventually caught sight of the two girls kneeling over their father.

"Hey!" Jyn shouted, racing over to them. Marcus was lying on his back, blinking rapidly as he breathed hard.

"He's hurt," the eldest girl said while the younger one cried.

The TIE fighters came round for another attack and Jyn heard the U-Wing taking flight. Another set of explosions targeting the palace caused fragments to tumble down around them. The girls screamed.

"It's okay," Jyn tried to assure them. "We gotta move your father, can you help me?"

The three of them dragged Marcus into a more open view away from the smoke where Jyn caught glimpse of the U-Wing making a turn around the palace, taking out a TIE fighter. Her plan worked and Cassian saw them. He landed; the rebels in the back jumping out to help retrieve Marcus. Jyn grabbed the girls by their hands and ran towards the U-Wing.

"Wait!" the eldest girl yelled. "Papa dropped his bag!" She let go of Jyn's hand and ran back.

"Take her!" Jyn shouted at one of the rebels to take the youngest and darted for the eldest. She could hear the approach of another TIE wave and knew the U-Wing wouldn't stand a chance. Their luck had run out.

"Come on," Jyn shouted at the girl as she picked up her father's bag. "Move, move!"

They made it on board in time for their rather close escape from death. Jyn leaned against the door, catching her breath. Cassian was stone quiet in the pilot's seat while a rebel provided medical aide to Marcus. The girls sat nearby, holding hands. Jyn took her place in the co-pilot's seat, waiting for either instruction or the start of a shouting match. Cassian refused to look at her, keeping his expression masked as if he were in the midst of an interrogation. Occasionally, he would ask her to flip a switch or check their status, but it was brief and his tone neutral. He still refused to look at her. Jyn found this was the worst sort of punishment, or maybe he was refraining from creating a scene in front of those huddled in the back. Only time would tell.

Time did tell. Arriving back on Delta Base, Jyn assisted with those they evacuated and made sure they were settled in the medbay while Cassian spoke with Draven and Willard. Jyn returned to the U-Wing several hours later as the sun was starting to set. She was sitting in the co-pilots seat trying to memorise key features so she could, or rather hoped to impress Cassian they next time they took flight.

Cassian entered the U-Wing and stood back from Jyn near the comm station. Jyn sighed, knowing they could no longer hold off this conversation. She stood up and stepped down from the cockpit.

"Let's just get this over with, shall we?" Jyn said with her hands clasped in front of her.

Cassian stared at her steadily. "I could ask why, but I know the answer."

"I can't follow orders," Jyn replied sarcastically. "I can, actually. They were children, Cassian!"

Cassian stepped forward. "That's not the point!"

Jyn stepped forward. "What do you want me to say? That I'm sorry? That I won't do it again?"

"Of course you'll do it again," Cassian said, almost laughing. "You act on impulse."

"Which is something you clearly can't do," Jyn shot back immediately.

Cassian filled the gap between them; frustration in his eyes as he cupped her face with his hands and kissed her. Jyn whimpered from being startled as Cassian held their kiss that was full of longing and frustration. She didn't know what to do with her hands, so she placed them on his chest and pushed him back. Cassian stepped back, breathing heavily from what he had done. Jyn blinked, unsure why she had pushed him away. No doubt a reflex from all the times men had tried to kiss her. Her lips felt full and she raised her fingers to touch her lower lip. Cassian lowered his gaze to the floor, shaking his head slowly.

"I shouldn't have done that," he murmured. "Forgive me."

Jyn lowered her fingers. "Cassian..."

"General Draven wants you to debrief him; he's waiting in the command room."

"Cassian," Jyn said again, but he had already hopped out of the U-Wing walking away hastily.

Jyn lifted her fingers to brush her lips again, as if trying to feel his lips. It was their first kiss, and the first kiss in a long time Jyn actually wanted to repeat.