A/N: I'm so sorry guys, I promise the interesting* bits'll be coming soon – I just kinda have to set this stuff up otherwise the middle of the story won't make much sense. There will be EXPLOsiOnS and stuff it'll be fantastic* I swear.
Blistering, sunny, ninety two degrees, no cloud cover or a lick of breeze to boot. The SHIELD agent sighed and tilted his head to allow the cool air from the AC to roll under his collar. He supposed it was his good fortune that he was tailing a hacker who worked at a gas station – because this van was going to be on and running its AC all day.
On and running didn't mean on and driving though. This target had an incredibly unimpressive routine; everyday they entered the apartment complex around seven in the morning, slept until three or four in the afternoon, watched TV or some other sort of entertainment until about eight, and then left for the gas station at nine. Work, home, sleep; lather, rinse, repeat… there was no deviation. He couldn't imagine how they could stand it. The agent couldn't stand it and he wasn't even the one who partook in the routine. And judging from the complete lack of mail or visitors (besides the day manager from the gas station who sometimes came over) there wasn't much social interaction either. A full year of this bullshit; the agent had groaned in relief when he got the notification to move in on the potential.
He wasn't the only one who watched this target though, all of the agents rotated between the two others in the area. One of the other targets had been much more active than the other two combined – hacked bank accounts, stole people's identities – the whole shebang. He even burgled houses to boot, just because he could hack through the alarms. He didn't even steal anything except for a curtain once. He'd been arrested a month earlier because of the home invasion and run through a simplified version Fury's program… and denied. Even though his alibi had made him a potential and he had all the credentials of being a damn good hacker, he was tossed out because… well he didn't know. Unfortunately he didn't have the clearance to know how Fury decided people weren't the target.
The agent sighed and jacked the AC up higher. He still had another two hours before backup came to help him make an arrest. He wished it would go faster, this job was getting boring and his target was stagnant. Well, he was privy to their internet traffic and knew that they had logged into a confirmed hacking site the day of the PSA with Loki and Fury; so they weren't totally dead to their world. But after that there was nothing, like they'd just decided they didn't care. The agent had a feeling this target wouldn't make it through the program either.
A movement from the second story window caught his eye. Wow… the agent marveled, up a whole three hours early today, are we? They deserved a medal for deviating so far from the routine.
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I couldn't rest; it was just too hot and muggy and painful to sleep. Also I'd drunk three cans of some off-brand energy drink during my shift to stay awake. That might be it as well. Also this pillow was so uncomfortable and there was this crick in my neck that just refused to go away... I tilted my head to the side until I heard a soft crack and rubbed the base of my neck. That didn't help much. Now it hurt by my jaw as well. And all these goddamn sheets!
I gave my beauty rest up as a lost cause and rolled out of bed, dragging the traitorous blankets along as I stumbled groggily out of the bedroom. These need to go to the laundry. They were kicked unceremoniously in the general direction of the laundry basket by the front door, but just landed at the halfway mark in the living room. Ignoring them, I made my way kitchen where the fridge beckoned with promises of freshly squeezed oranges and all the other glories that a first world fridge could offer. The fun part about working in a small shop was having all the basics covered at any given time. Need milk? Wait for shift to start. I told myself it wasn't stealing because the pay was more criminal than I.
What truly was criminal though was this godforsaken heatwave. The orange juice was abandoned momentarily so that I could waft aside the curtains in my living room and reach the dials of the AC unit sticking out my window. Better. The cool air blasted over me and I couldn't help but stick my face right up to the grill. Much better.
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Thirty minutes, just thirty minutes. No more sitting in cars and cramped vans, listening to the static of the wire-tapped phone calls or whatever this pop music was. He glared at the agent besides him from behind the safety of his tinted sunglasses. Backup had arrived thirty minutes early, and sending them back could have potentially caused a scene – so they stayed. One of the agents that had been sent over in the van had abandoned his vehicle in favor for the first agent's undercover car. Talk about blowing cover. He even had the audacity to turn the radio on.
The incredibly incognito black van had at least had the sagacity to park five blocks down. He hoped they sweated terribly in their bulletproof vests. If there was one thing he couldn't stand it was their lack of professionalism. That and stagnation. And criminals. Well obviously, he wouldn't be one of SHIELDS most upwardly mobile agent if he didn-
"Heard you got a promotion."
He's making small talk!? At a time like this?!
"Congratulations."
"...Yeah."
Silence.
"It'd look good on your record," the unprofessional agent continued, "if you brought the hacker in."
"It'd look good on anyone's record."
"Yeah but you're really-"
"Let's just finish this first alright?"
The chastised agent shifted uncomfortably in his seat and muttered, "Well I just figured since you put the most into this one you should have your name printed in bold on the records."
The first agent sighed, simultaneously shamefaced for snapping at the intruder, and annoyed that he felt uncomfortable for snapping. "Listen, this guy just isn't it ya'know? Call it intuition. But…" he shrugged dismissively, "…thanks anyhow." He mumbled, and glanced out his window.
They sat there in awkward silence for the rest of their time together until two in the afternoon; mass show time. Every single target was about to be simultaneously arrested.
"Hey hey!" The agents in the black van suddenly cackled through the radio. "Show time guys! Big boss says move in."
The first agent rolled his eyes and pressed the talk button hard. "Ten four."
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The knock at the door was loud enough to disturb the fish in their bowl.
"Coming!" A small voice piped up from the other side of the door. The agents at the back shifted the guns in their hand, while the ones in the front waited with cuffs unclasped. They didn't expect much resistance, but this was mandatory. One of them actually felt sorry for the target.
"Can I help-" A short mousey looking boy opened the door cheerily, "AH!"
"Mister Keys?" An agent drawled.
"Uh… No?" The boy tried closing the door.
"Please don't resist us." The agent leaned forward and placed the cuffs on his bony wrists. "You're under arrest for suspicion of cyber terrorism, computer fraud, identity theft, and pirating films."
"Haha, what about loitering?" He asked nervously.
The agent stared at him blankly. The boys visage was that of a very underdeveloped fifteen year old – not the late twenty something that his birth records indicated he was. "This is not a joke Mister Keys. You have the right to remain silent…"
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The door was clearly not about to be opened. The agents that formed the first wall parted to allow the ones in the back to kick in the door.
"Freeze!" they shouted once they'd breached the entryway, "Hand's where we can see them!"
The young man stood in the middle of the room with his hands raised. He smiled at them apologetically and shrugged at the TV on the wall. "Can I finish this or..?"
What is with these people, and their damn notion of invincibility? The agent with the cuffs relished the feeling of tugging the targets arms behind his back. He'd been an asshole to tail.
"Mister Draper?" The agent asked, snapping the cuffs closed.
"That'd be me, but," he winced as his arms were tugged up higher, "aren't you gonna-"
"You're wanted for multiple counts of computer fraud and cyber terrorism, you have the right to remain silent…"
~~~~~~~01100101 01011000 01100101 00100000~~~~~~~
"Mister Beckett?"
The wispy white-haired elderly gentleman sighed and held out his wrists. "It was bound to happen eventually."
"Thank you for your cooperation… you're wanted on several counts of cyber terrorism - you have the…"
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"Miss Dweller?"
"Well shit." Miss Dweller suddenly slammed her phone into the wall besides the door.
The agent was a bit taken aback by the sudden movement, and quickly realized that she'd just tried to destroy some evidence. "Miss Dweller you have the ri-"
"Yeah, okay, let's just go…" She thrust her hands in his direction and sighed dramatically. "What're the charges?"
One of the agents from the back walked around the two to bag the destroyed phone. "Drug possession, armed robbery, computer fraud, identity theft, pirating entertainment, involuntary manslaughter…"
"What, no-"
"And prostitution."
"There it is."
~~~~~~~01100101 01011000 01100101 00100000~~~~~~~
"Mister Pierce…?"
An agent pushed open the door – it wasn't even locked. He glanced around the room and stepped aside to let the rest of the agents through. They moved swiftly through the rooms and checked the hiding spots for the target. "Not here."
The first agent held up the radio, "Target's rabbited."
A response cackled through his earpiece, and the surrounding agents looked to him expectantly. "Base heard him ping at an ATM downtown." They nodded and headed back to the vans - finally, some action.
~~~~~~~01100101 01011000 01100101 00100000~~~~~~~
Of course I went quietly. It threw me off though; I've always considered myself to be pretty perceptive. To find out that SHIELD had been tailing me for a full year without my knowledge is… karma, almost. I vaguely remember doing something similar to them once. Was I going to confess everything and turn into a bubbling ball of mush though?
Hell no.
The agent sitting on the opposite end of the table clearly didn't expect so much as a peep either. He was incredibly polite though, and even asked if I preferred to be referred to by my birth name or one of the other's that I'd stolen. I think he only did that so he could show off that he knew of every name I had taken. After that, the intake seemed to go as any other would.
"DOB, height… yadda yadda… got any relatives…?" He droned down the list of questions. It seemed arbitrary – he clearly already knew the answers.
"You tell me."
The agent sighed and rubbed his eyes. He had the patience of a saint I'd give him that. No matter how many times I acted like an impudent child his voice remained flat and he just tried to explain again, for the umpteenth time, that he merely would like to confirm everything. The bags under his eyes indicated that he at least needed a pick me up though.
"You know," I said, giving him a half-smile, "if you release me I could get you a cup of coffee from the gas station." We both knew that would get me nowhere, but I was just trying to seem like less of an asshole at that point. I don't like being impolite.
"As wonderful as that sounds," he said, tiredly eying the paper before him, "I don't think Fury would be very impressed."
"But I'm innocent."
He sighed again and flipped a page over. "Let's see… multiple counts of embezzlement, identity theft, and one count of cyber terrorism-"
"Alleged cyber terrorism." I insisted.
He flicked through the small pile and then picked one from the middle of the stack and pulled it out. "Eeeer…" he said eyeing it up close before pushing it across the table so that I could see it. "Look," he poked at a line of numbers, "you're looking at three life sentences right now – even if you aren't the hacker."
Well shit, he's got me there.
But it made no sense. If he had all the evidence and already had me captured… why not just lock me up now? Like he said; there was a chance that I was the hacker – why not just put me away for something unrelated and leave it at that? The hacker would be out of the picture, SHIELD would be happy - why was he trying to make it seem like there was some other option? I wondered vaguely about the chances of him giving me a straight answer if I asked him.
"So… why don't you arrest me then?"
He deadpanned for a second like he hadn't heard me, and then burst into laughter. "Arrest? You? Haha ha- ow." He massaged his cheeks. "Oh that's good."
Rude little shit.
"But we are arresting you, it's happening right now. You're very much about to go to jail."
Oh.
"Um… do I get a lawyer? Or something?"
He snorted. "Yeah, sure."
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I actually didn't have a lawyer; nor did I know how to find one. It was quite possible that I did have a lawyer, but somehow misplaced him or never paid attention to the lawyer lecture my mother had given me when I was an adult. These are the things they should teach in school. But alas, I was handcuffed and trundled out of the county jail without so much as a phone call, and escorted into my own private armored vehicle with a fat SHIELD-eagle painted on the side.
Some crazed and desensitized part of my mind was flattered; but thankfully the louder and saner part was still panicking. They helped me up into the back of it – which had less to do with them being good-mannered and more to do with the fact that the ankle-cuffs limited anything beyond a shuffle – and moved me to the far back of the van. There were already six other agents inside, which seemed incredibly unnecessary, and they all wore bulky vests and bulkier guns. They looked like the people who arrested me earlier. Everyone looked like the people who arrested me earlier.
The thick metal doors swung shut with an oddly unsatisfying clink noise, and the agent nearest to me suddenly banged on the cab side wall. The floor rumbled beneath my feet, and the car slowly took off – destined… wherever. I dearly wanted to ask where we were going or how long it would take, but both fear and common sense kept me silent. I shut my eyes and instead rested my head against the metal wall, wondering if I could daydream this car ride through. It was terribly uncomfortable because the vibrations from the wheels were making my nose itch… but I just put my head back and I was acutely aware that I had just moved my body a second ago and moving again would seem strange. Ohmygosh my nose. I could feel tears begin to prick at the edges of my eyes, it was so damn itchy-
My whole frame rocked forward as I sneezed, and I jerked back up the second I realized what I'd just done. I glanced up to find six guns not quite pointing at me, but very much close to it. They eased back down and eyed me warily as I leaned back against the wall - carful to keep my head upright. I'd just have to stare at my hands the whole time. And these seats. Now my backside had a cramp; this wouldn't end. I swear; Fury must've made this vehicle with the hacker in mind. Eight years of pent up rage poured into a custom built car with hard plastic benches and rumbling walls and a severe lack of windows.
This was a good a place as any to come up with an escape plan – I doubted I'd be getting much alone time soon after this.
*A/N.2: I mean, if you're into that kinda stuff