Chapter 6: A Future

Anna's POV

I've spent a good portion of my life helping others. I always felt like it was in my blood from a young age. There was just something about making a difference that made my heart race in a good way. Once I started my clinical's when I was 22...I knew there was no other place for me than working with children. The innocence in their eyes is what makes me want to help them get better. Sometimes the reality doesn't even affect them because they're just kids. They just want to spend another day playing and laughing. If there is a way for me to help get them there, then it is all worth it. Unfortunately that doesn't always happen. But when it does...it's the greatest feeling in the world. So when the roles got reversed and I got sick...I felt completely lost. I didn't know how to let other people take care of me. That was always my job. And because it was always my job it made me know way too much. About my disease and how much could go wrong once I started treatment. But if there is anything I learned from everything I've been through...it's that another day is not always guaranteed. I started to lose hope to be honest. My treatment felt like it was leading me to the end of my limits. It wasn't working the way it should be and I knew that. I knew that if I didn't fine a bone marrow donor and soon...I'd die. As awful as that reality was, in some way I was really at peace with it all. It's a really horrible day, the day you realize your life might be over. All I could think about was the things I didn't do. The experiences I'd never get to have. But that's life sometimes. A series of moments that sometimes is just cut too short. A lot of times it's all just not fair. As if fate had somehow intervened...in walked Kelly Severide into my life.

The way he fought to help me was absolutely incredible. I've never had somebody care so much in my entire life. In some ways, I had a hard time understanding his reasons. To subject himself to so much pain for somebody he never met before...why? He explained the path his life was taking and the overwhelming need to make a change. Maybe this all really is fate after all. He needed to find a purpose in his life. I needed my life back. I don't know about any of it, but I feel like this connection runs deeper than I ever thought was possible. And that scares me a lot. Our fast friendship is being fueled by my illness. If this transplant truly works and puts me into remission, I'll be going home to Springfield sooner rather than later. While I am thrilled at the possibility of taking my life back..I'll admit it I will definitely miss Kelly in it. I've learned a lot about his man that saved my life. His own life is far from perfect. He has suffered a lot of loss and pain in his life. He's raising a daughter without a real clue of what he's doing. And that scares him more than anything. But I can tell, whether he believes it or not...he's a great father. The connection he feels to his late best friend through his daughter is amazing. I think what he did for her is one of the most remarkable things I've ever heard. He gave her a chance to have a family she otherwise never would have gotten a chance to experience. And even if it didn't last long...it happened. And whatever Kelly and Lizzie experience from here on out is what matters most.

"Hey, Anna." I turn and see Kelly standing at the door.

"Kelly, hi."

"How are you feeling?"

"Great actually. The best I have in a really long time."

"That's great."

"It's all thanks to you. You've given me my life back, Kelly."

"You know, in some weird way you've give me mine too. I'm so happy you're doing so well."

"What about you? How are feeling?"

"Good. I mean, I'll admit I'm still really sore. It hurt a little more than I thought."

"Well, yeah the whole drilling into your hip thing is pretty bad. And you agreeing to do it all without anesthesia...well you're insane."

"That's how you talk to the man that saved your life?"

"Yes. I will always be grateful to you and be in complete awe of how you could do this. But I don't even know how you tolerated it."

"I'm a lot stronger than I look."

"Yeah, sure whatever you say. Did you go back to work already?"

"No. In a couple days. I had a lot of time so I figured now was as good a time as any to milk it out a little."

"Yeah. Sometimes you just need the break."

"Definitely. I was a little burnt out as it was. This...is exactly what I needed. And plus, it's given me a little time to spend with Lizzie too."

"That's great. How is she doing?"

"Good. Just sort of adjusting to me being around more. You know, less time with Casey and Dawson. Not a huge fan of that."

"I'm sure that's not true. She's your daughter, Kelly. She loves you."

"Some days I wonder." He says, looking into my eyes. Then something comes over his mind and his thoughts seem to wonder a little. "You know what, give me a minute. I'll be right back."

"Okay. I'm not going anywhere anyways."

Being around Kelly has made me laugh again and it feels good. There was a while there where I really let this cancer take over my life. It consumed all of me. Sometimes I feel like I've known him all my life. How comfortable we've become with each other...it's a really good thing. I just wonder how things will be once I go back home. Any day now they're going to discharge me and we're both gonna go back to our own lives. Now that my connection to him is so strong, I wonder if I can. I know I wasn't ever supposed to...but I can feel myself falling for Kelly. It's not supposed to be like this but I can't help it. We've been pretty inseparable since the transplant. He comes to see me every day and we spend hours together just talking and laughing. So much so, that there are some days that I forget what's really happening. I forget just for a little while, that I am still sick. That that is the whole reason we are here together now. Although, I'm pretty much out of the woods now...I'm still holding my breath. I guess I'm just scared that they're going to walk in here one day and say it didn't work. That I'm not getting better and I'm not going to make it. Even though I can feel it working and I'm getting stronger every single day...that fear I think will always exist in me. That's why for right now, I'm just taking it all day by day and embracing whatever comes next.

"Hey." I hear Kelly's voice say, taking me out of my thoughts. "I wanted you to meet somebody."

"Sure." I say turning to face him and come face to face with him and a beautiful blue eyed little girl.

"Anna, this is Elizabeth. Lizzie this is my friend, Anna."

"Wow, it's so nice to finally meet you. I've heard a lot you. And you are even prettier than your dad said you were."

"Thanks. Are you sick?" The little girl asks, looking around at the room.

"Well...yes I was. But your dad saved my life."

"Really?"

"Yes. He helped me out and I am feeling much better now."

"Wow."

"Yup. Your daddy is a hero."

"Were you in a fire? My dad saves people in fires all the time."

"I know, he does. Firefighters are always heroes, right? But not this time. He just knew I needed help and decided to come to my rescue."

"That's good. I like your necklace." She says, pointing to my neck and climbing up onto the bed next to me.

"Thank you. It was a gift from my mom."

"I don't have a mommy." the little girl says, breaking my heart just a little. And I can see the pain wash over in Kelly's eyes.

"Yeah, I know. But you know what? Sometimes family comes in all different shapes and sizes. Some people just have a mommy. Some people just have a daddy. And if you're really lucky...you have so many people that love you. I have a feeling that's exactly what you have. I bet there are just a load of people lining up to give you an amazing family...one just your own."

"Yup. She has her uncle Matt and aunt Gabby. Chief Boden and Donna. Uncle Hermann and Cindy...and all their kids. Cruz and Otis...Sylvie and Mouch. They all love her so much. Isn't that right, Lizzie?" Kelly chimes in as she nods and has this huge smile come across her face.

"Wow. Now that is a lot of love for one little girl to have."

"Will you be my friend too?"

"I would love that, Lizzie. I think we can all be the best of friends."

"Yeah, I like that idea. We're all connected here. Maybe there was a reason for that." Kelly says, as Lizzie wraps her little hands around my neck pulling me into a hug.

Meeting this little girl has opened my eyes even further into my feelings for Kelly. To see the kind of family he has created is pretty incredible. I would love the idea of getting to be a part of it all. I know that soon life might start to change. I'm going to go home and start my life back up. They're going to be here in Chicago. And more and more I am finding reasons to stay close. That might sound crazy, but in some weird way...it feels right. Right now I guess only time will tell. But whatever the future holds, I'm ready for it. Because for the first time in a long time...I realize that I might actually have one.