Clary was finishing her meal - namely, drinking from Jonathan - when he looked at her, a question on his eyes.
"What's wrong?", Clary asked, cleaning his blood from her mouth with the back of her hand.
"I've been thinking about that other vampire girl,", he started, and Clary did her best to hide the pang of jealousy in her chest. It wasn't, however, enough, because Jonathan smiled. "Not like that, Clarissa. I was thinking about how she was turned."
Clary frowned.
"You want to be turned?", she asked, and he shrugged. "I mean, I could turn you, I think I know how."
"You should, considering you're a vampire,", he laughed, and shook his head, eyes serious and quiet. "I… I don't know if I'd want to become a vampire. In one hand, I got eternity to spend with you, which is nice. On the other…"
His eyes fled from hers, and Clary started rubbing circles on the back of his hand. Clary let him join his words, convey whatever he wanted to say. She couldn't notice, however, how his plans for eternal life involved her. That was cute.
"On the other hand, it means I stay with this fucked up mind for the rest of my life and beyond it, and I don't know if I can do that.", Clary felt tears sting her eyes, but she blinked them away. "Is that worth eternal life? I don't know."
"Jonathan…", she threw herself on his arms, and Jonathan, almost automatically, hugged her. "I'm so sorry."
"But it's not your fault?"
"Still.", she let herself breathe deeply into his scent, committing it to memory, just to be sure. She let go of his arms, kissing him softly before separating. "If you want to turn, let me know, and if you don't, I'll stay anyway."
Jonathan smiled softly, and kissed her.
"I can't wait to be an eighty year old with a banging young nurse,", he joked, and Clary swatted him. "Hey, it's the truth. I'm going to be the old guy with the young wife."
"You'd marry me?", she frowned, and Jonathan blushed. "We can't, you know."
"Nothing says we can't move to some city where no one heard of us and buy rings, although,", Jonathan pointed out, and Clary smiled, kissing him once more. When they separated, he kept speaking."Live together, buy groceries for one, all that married stuff. Just, you know, not married."
"That'd be nice.", Clary told him, because really, it would be nice to have a life with Jonathan where they wouldn't have to worry about being walked on, a life where they could go outside hand in hand with no issues. Maybe in the future, although - a future that it wouldn't matter if Jonathan was a vampire or not. Clary went back to kissing him.