The trace of the lost Turian Pathfinder brought them to the sad end. Macen was dead and Avitus needed to retake his role. Sara felt sorry for him, just imagining how it must had been for him to know that Macen was in a place of no return and the only memory alive was the SAM which had now belonged to him. Sara trusted Avitus to be a great Pathfinder, but she felt for him seeing how this lost had touched him deeply. She ordered the Turian SAM to be loaded on the Tempest and asked Avitus to join them. The ship was now on its way to Nexus were the scientists would look after the transfer to be done successfully so the Turians would not lose another Pathfinder. Sara kept looking after him, seeing him seeking empty rooms and spaces on the ship to be alone. He stared at the stars and was almost silent. However, she did not dare to speak to him. Sara did not feel worth enough to give him support he needed. She was not the person, they had not known each other for long, but she was ready for anything if he asked. But he did not.

This was personal for her. Having so many aliens on this ship she cared so much about. Losing any of them would make her feel empty, she was sure of it. But Avitus lost his mate, his lover and that was different. Since her mind cracked that time, she did not try to approach Lexi again. Peebee was sweet like nothing ever happened, which made their relationship strong again, but only around a friendship base. Although Peebee sometimes flirted with Ryder, she could not do this again without being sure she wants commitments. And, after all what happened, she knew that between her and Peebee could not be more again. Lexi was the one she was more interested in, felt a strange resonance in her body, but it seemed that Lexi did not share that view. Well, Ryder had not try to talk to her about it again, there was no time and, Sara felt shy. Especially when those two started to share med-bay, like two best buddies. Liam was making fun of her, and Vetra too. Well, Gill too and so Drack… Nearly everybody. It was a new favourite topic amongst the crew members, and after the "Little duck" nickname, Sara was called "ex"-humiliator, ex-o-pet or, what was Gill's and Liam's most favourite one, the Burnt Duck…. It made Sara's sense calling for a new identity. Of course, all the nicknaming stopped when Lexi or Peebee walked around or was on a shared frequency. It, however, did not take long before Peebee started to call Sara a Burnt Duck too. Only Lexi was hiding her laugh behind her professional mask, and Sara's ego was humiliated beyond any acceptable level. She was even ready to study some guidebook of Turian's or Asari religions, call the Goddess or Titans for help, or even try to find some Krogan shaman to teach her about requiring back her lost honour. She would rather fight a Thresher Maw than listening about her big hilarious fuck up. Maybe Suvi could teach her something about the God's forgiveness or Karma and how to put herself back into their favour.

Nevertheless, even all jokes silenced after the death of the Turian Pathfinder. Their thoughts were with Sara and with Alec. The Human Ark nearly lost both pathfinders. The second one nearly twice. It made them think and work harder and longer while on their way to Nexus. Avitus had become some kind of a symbol or a reminder of the importance their mission had and that the dangers were too real to run away from. The Scourge caused death of many, and the Kett were on their way to finish the job.

Sara was in her room watching the distant stars and thinking about how really close she was to end up like Macen. Cora would be the one who would take after her. She once reminded her about it when she questioned her actions. Cora would be great, but she as anybody still had some unfinished business to do. They needed to find the Asari ark before it was too late. Cora informed her that with help of the Nexus scientific team, she would get the location within few days. It was a beam of hope and Sara wanted to grasp it fully, with her heart and soul, and believe it like an uncorrupted truth. She wanted to believe that things could never get wrong again and they would save everyone. You're a silly one. She was hearing Vetra's voice in her head. But you're the boss and I'm gonna follow you everywhere, because you are worth following. Yes, they were following her decisions, her actions and she needed to bring them to the good path.

Sara once had a chance to talk to her personal hero, Capt. David Anderson. She was too young to even guess what was waiting for her, but the Captain put a hand on her shoulder and looked her in the eyes. She was young and lost, but full of passion and beliefs to change the world…. She remembered those tired eyes of a leader and a war hero anytime she looked in the mirror. She was no hero of a sort, she did not feel that way, but she understood better the luggage a leader needed to carry with every step. The loneliness it followed….

She remembered his words clearly and a tired smile on his face. It was still cheerful and optimistic, but tired. Ryder, the hardest of choices is to save your hope. Keeping it, you are a fighter… Losing it, you end up as a killer. With so much blood on her hands and tough choices costing more and more lives, she understood what he meant. When she was losing her hope, being cracked down by the responsibility, she was ready to kill and die without a purpose. She herself would be a killer of her own life. But hope made her go on with a certain determination which could pull her tired body to move when other's hope was lost. Hope could be lost so easily that it was really the hardest task ever… Hope in humanity, hope in good, hope in every member of the alien races they known about to make the right choice at the end when they would be summoned to fight for something greater than themselves. She could not tell Avitus he was the right one to follow Macen's footsteps if had she lost this hope. Sara was determined to save it. Not only for the races of the Milky way, but also for the Angaran, and even for the Kett.