The Fisherman and His Wife
Based on the German fairytale and DBZ-ified.
Starring: Goku, Chichi, Shenron
A story with a moral.
A/N: Bit of Chichi hate going on here. It fit the story though...
There was once a fisherman who lived with his wife in a little hut close to the sea. The fisherman went fishing every day and enjoyed the peace and serenity he found in his job. The sparkling blue ocean cheered him and he lived happily.
One day he felt something big tugging on his line. He stared deep into the deep water and saw a large shadow beneath the waves.
"Finally!" Goku grinned widely. "I was starting to think I fished the ocean dry."
He pulled hard on the line and reeled with all his substantial strength. With a burst of water, an enormous fish broke the surface of the sea. It was twice as big as Goku and a bright shimmering green. It had a fierce looking face and sharp teeth.
"Woah!" Goku gaped at the beast. "Now that's a big fish!"
"WHO HAS SUMMONED ME?" Rumbled the big fish.
"I'm Goku the fisherman." Said Goku. "And you're going to be my dinner."
"FISHERMAN GOKU, DO NOT EAT ME." Shenron said. "FOR I AM SHENRON. THE MIGHTY ENCHANTED DRAGONFISH OF DREAMS. RETURN ME TO THE SEA TO SWIM FREELY."
"Gosh, I never met a talking fish before." Goku scratched the back of his head. "I'm awful hungry, but that's no problem. I'd rather not eat a talking fish. You're probably the only one!" He waded out and unhooked the dragonfish. "I'll just try another spot."
He released the dragonfish and fished elsewhere. Unfortunately he didn't catch anything else. A little disappointed, he went home to his wife in the little hut by the sea.
Goku walked in to the hut with a smile. "Chichi, I'm home!"
"Goku," came the disapproving reply, "where's the fish?"
"Oh…" Goku rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly. "I uh… didn't catch anything today."
Chichi turned from her place at the stove to pin Goku down with a glare. "Nothing at all?"
Goku started to sweat. "Well, I did catch a dragonfish, but he said he was one of them enchanted fish. So I let him go."
A vein pulsed in Chichi's forehead. "You… let him go?"
"Uh… yeah." Goku gulped nervously.
There was a pause.
"Why didn't you wish for anything?!" She exploded.
"W-what do you mean?" Goku backed up a little. "Sure he was an enchanted fish, but there's nothing we really need…"
"Are you kidding me?! Just look at this place!" Chichi gestured at the humble hut. "It's so poor and wretched! I used to live like a princess and now we live in THIS! You could've at least wished for a nice clean cottage or apartment or something! ANYTHING would be better!"
"I thought you were okay with it…"
"I'm not!" Chichi pointed angrily at the door. "Now you go back and find that fish right now Goku! Tell him I want a pretty little cottage! It's not a hard wish! He'll surely give it to us."
"But Chichi," Goku pleaded, "I only caught him by chance. He might not even be willing to listen to me."
"Nonsense! You spared his life so now he owes you." She spun him around and pushed him out the door. "Now get going!"
The fisherman was unhappy and unwilling to go back, but his wife was downright scary when she was angry. He went back to the sea and looked across the water. It did not sparkle like it had before. Now it was a dull green. He cleared his throat and spoke loudly across the waves.
"Oh mighty Shenron beneath the sea,
I summon you forth, please listen to me;
My wife is angry and wants a wish,
As thanks for not making you my dish."
He waited there for a moment, fidgeting in the fading light of day. Then a great swell rose from the ocean's smooth surface. Shenron's fearsome face burst from the water in a shower of droplets.
"FISHERMAN GOKU, WHAT DO YOU WANT?"
"Oh… uh…" Goku looked up at the dragonfish. "Actually Chichi, my wife, sent me to ask you for a wish. She says that when I caught you, I should've wished for something." He sighed. "She says she doesn't want to live in our hut anymore. She wants a pretty cottage."
The dragonfish's eyes glowed red for a moment. Then he said. "RETURN HOME. HER WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED." And disappeared beneath the waves.
The fisherman went home and found that where his hut used to stand, now stood a little cottage, pretty as you please. It was bigger than his hut had been with a yard holding chickens and ducks and a pretty little vegetable garden full of ripe produce ready for picking. Awed by the dragonfish's power, he went inside and saw that the cottage was completely furnished with the nicest things. Tables and chairs, couches and beds, paintings and plants, a big screen TV and fully stocked fridge, it was almost too much to take in.
"Oh Goku!" Chichi rushed up to him and caught him in a big hug. "Isn't it lovely?"
"It's really nice in here." Goku's eyes immediately went to the fridge. "Can I have a snack?"
Chichi chuckled. "I'll make you dinner after we finish exploring this place!"
Goku smiled at his happy wife. "I'm glad you like it Chichi. We can live here happily, don't you think?"
"We'll see." Chichi replied with a strange smile. Goku felt a slight chill go down his back at her expression, but it was washed away by the prospect of a hearty meal.
They lived there quite happily for a week or so. Then one day before the fisherman went fishing, his wife stopped him with a question.
"Goku," Chichi said slowly, "don't you think this cottage is too cramped?"
Goku looked up from mending his nets. "Cramped?"
"Yes. It's far too small." Chichi sighed heavily. "That fish could've given us a bigger house, but he gave us one like this? What would we do if we had company over?" She nodded to herself. "There's nothing for it. Go back to the fish and get him to give us something bigger."
"But we have all the space we need." Goku said with a frown. "What would we do with more space?"
"We would be prepared!" Chichi pushed him towards the door. "Now go ask the fish for a castle!"
"A castle?" Goku was pushed out into the yard. "But he already gave us this cottage! He's not gonna give us a castle!"
"He has the power to do it easy." She set a steely glare on him. "He owes you. Go get us a castle or you'll go without dinner."
The fisherman's heart was heavy. He really didn't want to go ask for more from the fish. It wasn't right to ask for more when they had all they needed. Nevertheless, he went back to the sea to find the dragonfish. When he reached the ocean, the water was still calm, but dark and grey instead green or blue. He looked out of the water and called for the fish.
"Oh mighty Shenron beneath the sea,
I summon you forth, please listen to me;
My wife threatened to take my food away
Unless you grant her wish today."
Again Shenron's face broke the waters. He looked at Goku curiously.
"FISHERMAN GOKU? WHAT DO YOU WANT?"
"Ah… sorry about this, but it's Chichi again." Goku said. "She wants a castle."
The dragonfish's eyes glowed red. "GO BACK HOME. HER WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED."
The fisherman returned home to find not a little comfortable cottage, but a great stone palace. All around it were gardens bursting with flowers and trees laden with ripe fruit. A stable was off to the side where groomsmen brushed horses down and prepared ornate carriages. A park was on the other side, filled with stags and foxes and hares. As he walked inside, servants opened the doors for him and bowed as he passed, awed once more into the great hall. It was paved with marble slabs and had grand pillars supporting the roof. The walls were hung with beautiful tapestries and intricate woven carpets covered the floors. Crystal chandeliers hung from the ceiling. A long table further down the hall was groaning with the weight of rare delicacies and costly foods. It was all anything anyone could every want.
"This is amazing." Goku was stunned. "What are we gonna do with all this stuff?"
"Oh Goku!" Chichi dashed up to him from another ornate room. "Isn't this far better than the cottage? It's almost like my father's castle!"
Goku smiled at her. "As long as you're happy. We're sure to be content with this place, right?"
Again Chichi smiled that strange smile. "We'll see." Goku looked hard at her, but was easily distracted by the table of delicacies.
They went to bed happy. However, when the wife woke up the next morning, she looked out the window and saw the beautiful countryside all around them. The sun shone brightly and illuminated everything in a golden glow. The wife felt a sudden, all encompassing, fiery desire.
Chichi elbowed her husband roughly in the side. "Goku! Goku wake up!"
"Mmmmwha?" Goku rubbed the sleep from his eyes and sat up. "G'morning Chi…"
"Goku! Look outside!"
Goku turned sleepy eyes to the window. He yawned. "Yeah… sunrises sure are pretty."
"Not the sunrise, you doofus!" Chichi gestured out the window. "The land! We could be president over all this!"
"President?" Goku laid back down and rolled over. "What do you wanna be president for?" Chichi shoved him off the bed and he tumbled to the floor with a bang. "Awwh!" He looked up at Chichi and gave her a hurt look. "But I don't want to be president."
"Well if you don't want to be president, I will. Go back to the fish and get him to make me president."
"Why do you want to be president?!" Goku was exasperated. "We've asked him for too much already!"
"Goku…"
Ten seconds later, the fisherman was running from the castle half dressed and afraid for his life. When he was far enough away to be sure of his safety, he finished dressing. He walked to the beach, sad that his wife wasn't content. Wasn't he enough for her? He really didn't want to ask the dragonfish for anything else, but he loved his wife. Perhaps she'd be satisfied after becoming president?
He reached the sea and saw that it was dark grey, and stormy. It gave off a foul fishy smell, like there had been a plague beneath the waves. He stood on the shore and called out to the fish.
"Oh mighty Shenron beneath the sea,
I summon you forth, please listen to me;
My wife seems to want more from you,
And frankly I don't know what to do."
Shenron slowly rose from the water. There was a toothbrush between his teeth and he looked rather put out.
"FISHERMAN GOKU. YOU ARE BACK AGAIN?"
"It's Chichi again." Goku said sadly. "She wants to be president now." He spread his hands in supplication. "We already have a president, but she wants to be president instead. I just don't get it."
Shenron's eyes flashed red, but an irritated kind of red. "REGARDLESS. HER WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED." And he vanished without another word.
So the anxious fisherman headed back home. When he arrived, the castle he had slept in last night had changed into a much larger place. A great tower had been added and there were bright banners and pennants everywhere. Inside, everything was gilded with marble and gold. The tapestries were of fine velvet with great golden tassels. A grand door was open and there, behind a desk sat his wife. She was talking frantically on a phone and secret service men watched her from every angle.
Goku cleared his throat softly. "So… you're president now, right Chichi?"
Chichi looked up from her phone call irritably. "Of course I'm president now. Can't you see how busy I am?"
"I see that…" Goku's face fell a little. "But isn't this what you wanted?"
"Of course this is what I wanted!" Chichi shouted, slamming the phone on the receiver. "I'm just dissatisfied with how this country is run! All this work is driving me crazy!"
"Er… maybe being president isn't such a good idea?"
Chichi paused. "You know what? You're right!"
Goku blinked. "I am?"
"Yes!" Chichi looked at him fiercely. "Being president is too small! I should be king instead!"
"King?!"
"Yes King!" Chichi nodded. "Being a king means everyone has to listen to you whether they want to or not. Go back to the fish and get him to make me king!"
"But we already have a king! King Furry!" Goku shook his head. "Shenron won't do it! We've already asked him for too much!"
"He's done it all easily so far! It'll be easy for him!" Chichi pointed at Goku and suddenly all the security guards were around him. "You'll do it because I am president and you have to listen to the president. And even if I weren't president, I'm still your wife! Now get going!"
The fisherman was ushered not so pleasantly out of the castle. He was quite frightened of his wife at this point. This was so out of character for her. He knew that this wouldn't end well, but what could he do? He made his way back to the ocean. When he came to the sea, he found it black and heaving in great waves. The wind blew so fiercely that the surface foamed into great white troughs. Nevertheless, the fisherman stood firm on the beach and called out over the waves.
"Oh mighty Shenron beneath the sea,
I summon you forth, please listen to me;
My wife is president and she makes the rule,
She wants something else and I feel like a fool."
This time, Shenron burst from the heaving waves in a mighty spurt, throwing water high into the air.
"FISHERMAN GOKU! WHY HAVE YOU SUMMONED ME?!"
"I'm sorry Shenron." Goku said. "Chichi sent me again. She's tired of being president. She wants to be king now." Shenron gave him a look and Goku sighed. "I know, right? It's getting ridiculous."
Shenron's eyes glowed a dangerous red. "HER WISH HAS BEEN GRANTED, BUT BE WARNED. NOTHING GOOD COMES FROM GREED."
"Preaching to the choir buddy." Goku muttered.
The fisherman went back home to find the castle gone. In its place stood a grand palace made entirely of polished marble with grand alabaster sculptures and golden decorations. Soldiers marched up and down before the doors, blowing on trumpets and beating drums. Inside, lines of dukes and princes stood waiting for an audience with the king. The grand golden doors to the throne room were wide open. On a throne made of gold and diamonds his wife sat tall with a golden crown on her head and the royal scepter in her hand. All around her stood her ladies in waiting and secret servicemen.
Goku stood before the throne and swallowed nervously. "Chichi, are you king now?"
"Yes." Chichi said imperiously. "I am king."
"That's great." Goku said with an uneasy grin. "This means you won't want to be anything else, right?"
"No Goku." Chichi answered with a heavy sigh. "Being king is good, but everyone wants to see you. It would be better to be Kami instead of being the king myself."
"Kami?!"
"Yes. Now that I am king, I want to be Kami!" Chichi said. "Go right back to that fish and tell him to make me Kami!"
"No Chichi!" Goku frowned deeply at his wife. "This has gone too far! I won't go to Shenron and ask him to make you guardian over earth!"
"Goku, I am your king! You have no choice! I command you to go back to the dragonfish and make me Kami!"
"I won't!"
"Do it or I'll take away your food," Chichi glared at him, "for a month."
Goku paled. "I'll go hunting. I don't need to eat in the kitchen."
"Oh, but where will you hunt?" Chichi smiled patronizingly. "I am king. I rule over all the forests. You won't be allowed to hunt where I rule."
There was little more he could do than go back to the dragonfish. Part of him cursed having such a big appetite, but what else could he do? He went back to the ocean slowly. As he walked, he noticed how the wind blew fiercer and fiercer. Leaves fell from the trees; clouds practically flew across the sky to congregate over the sea. There they darkened and turned nearly black. The ocean itself was dark and it foamed and crashed almost angrily upon the shore. In the distance, ships on the ocean fired out distress signals as they too were tossed crazily about.
There was still a little patch of blue in the sky, but other than that the clouds were dark and foreboding. Like a storm was brewing overhead. In despair, he looked out across the sea and spoke.
"Oh mighty Shenron beneath the sea,
I summon you forth, please listen to me;
Chichi wants more; she wants to be Kami,
Guardian over earth, best at origami."
Shenron burst from the heaving sea with a roar.
"NOW WHAT DOES SHE…" The dragonfish paused. "ORIGAMI?"
Goku shrugged. "I'm not good at rhymes."
Shenron sighed heavily. "WHAT IS YOUR REQUEST?"
"Chichi wants to be Kami now." Goku shivered. "I'm afraid she's gone out of her mind."
"REGARDLESS. RETURN HOME. KAMI SHE IS." And the fish swam away.
The fisherman went back to the palace, but was shocked once more to see nothing. Rather, a hefty pole stuck out of the ground in the exact spot where the palace used to be. Made of the purest white marble, it stretched high into the sky. Higher than the eye could see. The fisherman sighed and started climbing. It took him a very long time to reach the top. But when he did, he saw a lush garden surrounding a pure white palace. He went inside and found his wife all alone, surrounded by candles and incense. She was robed in white and sat on a lofty throne made of the same shimmering white alabaster the entire place seemed to be made of.
"Chichi?" Goku asked nervously. "Are you Kami now?"
"Yes Goku. I am Kami." Chichi said.
He looked at her and had to squint. Everything was so white that it was hard to look at. He stood there in awkward silence for a good while.
Finally he spoke again. "So… are you happy being Kami?"
Chichi didn't answer him. She just sat ramrod straight on her blindingly white throne.
Goku frowned worriedly. "Please say yes. You can go no higher than Kami of Earth."
"Hmmmph." Chichi scoffed. "We'll see about that."
They went to bed that night with heavy hearts. The fisherman, for the fact that he would never have his wife back, and his wife, for the fact that she could go no higher. However, troubled as he was, the fisherman slept very well that night. He had gone a long distance and climbed the highest tower in the world. He was worn out.
His wife, on the other hand, didn't sleep at all so eaten up was she other the fact that there wasn't anything higher she could demand. But then, when the dawn broke over the horizon and light burst into the blindingly white palace, she was struck with inspiration.
Chichi sat straight up in bed. "That's it! Couldn't I be the one to make suns and moons and planets myself? I can't be happy with just guarding a planet. I want to make one!" She shoved an elbow into Goku. "Goku! Go back to the fish and get him to make me a Kai!"
Goku was only half asleep when he heard her, but he was so shocked that he fell out of bed and hit the floor with a thump. "Huh?! What did you say?!"
"Goku, if I can't be a Kai and make the sun rise and planets form, I won't be able to bear it." Chichi said with a crazed gleam in her eye. "I will never have another happy moment as long as I live if you don't do this for me."
She looked at him so wildly that Goku felt a shudder run through him from head to toe. "Chichi! Do you know what you are asking?! Shenron can't do that! King and Kami he can do, but a Kai? Are you even listening to yourself?!" Goku got to his knees before her, pleading from the edge of the bed. "Please control yourself Chi. Just stay Kami and learn to be happy with what you've got."
There was a moment of silence.
Suddenly, Chichi screamed. She howled and cursed and threw anything and everything that came to hand. She went after Goku, threatening him and trying to beat him horribly.
"DO IT! I CAN'T BEAR IT ANY LONGER! I WILL BE A KAI! A SUPREME KAI! GO NOW!"
It was a good thing that the fisherman was nimble and good at martial arts. He evaded his insane wife and leapt from the tower in his pajamas. There'd be no living with her after this. He was so sad and terrified of his wife, but frankly glad to get away from her.
He made his way to the sea. As he went, such a storm blew in that he had to fight the wind to keep his feet on the ground. The sky was black as pitch. Houses and trees trembled. The very earth shook under his feet. When he reached the ocean, the waves were so black and angry and high, it was as if he was looking at the end of the world. Still, he called out as best he could, though his words were carried away by the wind.
"Oh mighty Shenron beneath the sea,
I summon you forth, please listen to me;
This is it, I swear I'm done,
I hope to Kami that it's the last one!"
Shenron appeared from within the waves, voice booming over the wind and turmoil the world felt.
"FISHERMAN GOKU. YOU HAVE RETURNED."
"Shenron!" Goku shouted at the top of his lungs, trying to be heard over the storm. "Please tell me it can't be done! Please tell me Chichi won't get her wish!"
"WHAT IS HER REQUEST?"
Goku swallowed his fear. "She wants to be a Kai! Supreme Kai!"
Suddenly, the world went very quiet. The waves calmed, the wind died, the skies cleared, and the dragonfish smiled.
"THAT I CANNOT DO. NOW SHE MUST RETURN TO HER HUT BY THE SEA."
Goku sagged in obvious relief. "Thank Kami."
"IF SHE COMPLAINS, BRING HER TO ME." Shenron showed his teeth. "I WILL EAT HER FOR YOU, IF GREEDY SHE BE."
Goku beamed at Shenron. "Hey! You can rhyme too!"
And they lived in that hut to this very day.
THE END