DEBAUCHERY IN THE ORIFICIUM
It was a fine Saturday morning in Lordran. Hellkite Dragon was still asleeping, Solaire of Astorias was up early gazing at the sunrise and Patches the Hyaena preppeared to observe the Sabbath. Suddenly, Pinwheel crawled out of his cave and began collecting corpses for decoration. Ze was in dire need of human leather for zir books' covers and the walls of zir bedroom could use some extra skeletons.
Back in zis librery ze was at the operating table autospying some Darkwraith douchebag ze caught earlier. He was certainly the fugliest human ze'd ever sawed. Suddenly, ze herd the door nocking
-Knock knock -said the door
-Whose it? -aksed Pinwheel
-It is I, Gravelord Nito. unbolt the entrance 4 i have an impotrant matter i knead to discuss with u -answered Nito gallantly
-Abyss consume me! This place is shit and the fuckin lord of the dead is at the dort! -thought Pinwheel to zirmself.
Cetainly, it was a most pleasant honour for any skinless Lordranese to be in the pressence of the lord, let alone have him as a guest. Songs were sung of Nito's ungodly Pleasureshaft, how it killed anything it toched and spreaded missery to all living beings. Pigwheel zirself often fantasized of caressing it and mabey give it a lick.
The tricephallus moonstrosity opened the door and saw a regal, yet handsome apparition. Nito was holding a huge empty casket in the gayest manner, but he seemed nervous somwhow.
-Your Highness -gapsed Pinwheel kneelingly -What do you here?
-I ran out of human skeletons and Izalith told me you were The go-to guy for human skeletons -answered Nito blushingly
-Why, yes, yes, please come inside, m'lord -said the host flirtly. -There's a beanbag at the bonfire and a bag of Cheetos if u wanna chill.
The excited host was tossing zir choicest bones to the bonefire and sweaping the ashes at the same time. Ze couldn't believe it, ze was havign a sleepover with his god!
-Thanks! I won't be here too long -whispered Nito, who was already having a panic attack when he sat at his host's bonefire. Deep inside he didn't want this evening to end.
They talked awkwardly about deathly gallows and Doctor Who, laughing at the the occasional witty joke of sassiness and soon they both agreed that they had to fucj. The Great Lored was shoking his peen with a hand and fingering his tailbone with the otter. The mere sight of this made Pinwheel cum but he got insta hard agayn.
-Okay, Im ready -yelled Nito loduly as he uncovered his 2 foot member.
The legends didn't do it justice. It was a horrifying sight no human could withstand. One could see an uncorrupted slab of thick red meat throbbing with eagernes, but starring at it too long and you could see the famed Deadlights within his veins. Whatever vision one had, the lustful appendage had a dog knot.
-Oh my, it's all your falut I'm already like this -said Nito in a cute manner while pointing to his erect boner.
-I think we should like bang or something -answered Pinheel.
-I was thinking the same! -exclamed Nito, hugging a pillow excitedly.
-I'll get the vaseline -shooted Pinwheel
Nito got up from his beambag and grabbed Pinwheel's left hand. His eyes wear emanating a deadful light and his Reiatsu began to fill the room.
-T'aint neccesaire sweetie -bragged Nito as he summoned a miasma of death and disease with his otter hand and smeared it on his throbbing meathorror
-I've have been longing for that cock ever since I joined your covenant -said the Mother
-This will be mad fun! -giggled the Child
-Mmm... Smells like ye olden days -Reminisced the Father
The Gravelord poisitioned himself behind his buttbuddy and began stabbing zir relentlessly with his blasphemous corpsedick. The rythmic crushing of bones and sinew resonated all the way up to Lord Gwyn's chamber pot located miles above in Anor London and shattered it in over 100 pieces. The fire LOrd giggled like a catamite becoz he new what was goin' on and summoned Smough readilly:
-Smough, come here right the fuck now and change my chamber potty! -sighed Gwyn
-U rang? -whspered Smaug in his ear, which freaked the fuck out of his Master
-Jesus Christ you fuckin moran! -cried Gwain -How do you even do that shit?
-Hmmmm -grunted Shmoug
-My potty is broken cuz Nito is fucking one of his bone buddies again. -Complaned the ancient Lord. -There's a mess on the carpet and u need to clean it before my childrens come home.
Smaugh grabbed a turd with a pair of latex gantulets he brought from a crazy Katana-wielding hobo.
-You know, old fiend? -said the deity clamly as he looked at the sunset from his balcomy. -The girls are growing up and I'm not getting any yonger. Time will come when I'll have to retire. I want us to b a family again and mabey go on vacations togethre like we used to, but I dread the day this world has no need for this old man. I just can't picture myself being so... useless!
He sighed and turned around.
-Whatever shall I do?!
Smough was no longer there. The city had suddenly turned dark and their was an ominous silence. Gwen somehow knew his daughter had perished and soon he would be next...
- /3/ ! -shrieked Pinewheel in agonizing pain.
-I'm cumming! -cried out Nito while striking Pinwheel's bonegina.
When he climaxed, his seed crossed seas of time and space, spreading mortal pandemiae through all Creation and wiping out entire worlds. Thus he came, and embracing Pinwheel in his arms he axed:
-Art thou cryin, m'love?
-I think something has befallen on me eye -said the hexachirous freak.
-Mayhaps it's love? -risked Nito courteously.
-It must be so, that's been there a longe time, but now it doubtless wishes to be out. -answered the foul creature.
Nito had given him the Black Death.