„Kurt!" Isabelle came to them and hugged Kurt as soon as she saw them. "And Rachel. How are you?"
"I'm great thanks and thanks for inviting me too." They smiled at each other.
"Yes, it's great to have you both here. Shall we go inside?"
"Yes." Kurt nodded and walked toward the restaurant, to held he doors open for them. "Wow Isabelle, this place looks amazing." Kurt was amazed.
"And you should taste the food." She smiled again, before she greeted the waiter and the chef who came out of the kitchen. The waiter showed them their table, a little more private than the others and left them alone. "The chef here is amazing, I just love his food and he'll bring us something special. I don't know what, I never order, he always surprises me." She sounded very excited.
While they waited they talked a lot about fashion, but Rachel was never that interested in fashion so Kurt and Isabelle did the most talking. After a while, the waiter came with an appetizer. The chef made a plate of bruschetta and all of them a smaller plate with rice salad. It was delicious and Rachel saw, that her salad had no mozzarella in it like the others.
"How did you know?" She asked Isabelle, who smiled happily at Rachel. It was vegan.
"Kurt told me and I'm sure it tastes great even without it."
"Yes it does." Except that Rachel was quiet for the whole night.
She answered questions, when she was asked and she praised the food. When Isabelle got up to go to the restroom, Kurt turned to Rachel.
"Rachel what's up?" He looked concerned.
"Nothing." She lied and she knew that he knew.
"Don't lie to me Rachel."
"I'm sorry Kurt. I'm not really in the mood."
"What's on your mind?" Rachel was not sure if she could tell and Kurt saw her struggling. "Are you gay?" He asked her as nicely as possible, but the question still shocked Rachel.
"What?!" Rachel said it louder than she intended it, and a few people looked at them. "Why would you even asked that Kurt?" Now she whispered.
"Rachel you and Cassandra? It's obvious you like her more than you should like your teacher."
"Can we please not talk about her?"
"You stole a poster, because she was on it." Touché.
"I don't know Kurt, it just feels different-" Isabelle returned.
"I'm sorry did I interrupt you?"
"No it's all right." Kurt told her. The waiter came and he turned to Rachel, while Isabelle and the waiter talked. "We'll talk about this later." Rachel frowned a little, she did not want to talk about this, but for the rest of the night she joined she conversation more. She had a delicious vegetable casserole. They finished the dinner and Isabelle walked over to the chef to thank him and gave the waiter his tip.
"It was a wonderful night with you two. We should do this again sometime." They walked outside the restaurant.
"Yes, we should." Kurt didn't sound as excited as he intended to, but Isabelle just smiled.
"I had a great time, it's nice to talk to some young people who don't act like I'm someone special. I mean I started just like you did."
"It was a wonderful night and thanks for dinner." Rachel smiled at her.
"You should go now, you've to go to school tomorrow right?" Rachel laughed about Isabelle's concerned reaction, when she realized how late it was.
"Yes I do, but that's okay."
"Alright, but you two should go home. I see you tomorrow Kurt."
"Yes. Goodnight." They hugged each other and Isabelle hugged Rachel, before she got in the black car that was waiting for her. Kurt walked over to a cab and opened he door. They sat in silence the whole drive and Rachel knew she had to justify her behavior when they got home.
Rachel got out of the car when they pulled over and walked in their building, she didn't wait for Kurt, who paid the driver.
"Talk to me." They entered the apartment and Kurt closed the door.
"Kurt I don't want to."
"But I do." He walked over to her and sat next to her on the bed. Why did everybody want to talk to her?
"I don't know what's going on Kurt."
"I think you're in love with your teacher." He gave her a questioning look, but Rachel said nothing. "I'm right!" She didn't deny it so both knew, he was. "That's great Rachel!" He smiled like something wonderful had happened and Rachel didn't understand.
"Why is that great? Being in love with your teacher is the opposite of great. It's not what I should feel for my teacher and I never thought that I would be gay, I mean its nothing bad, but I never felt this way and it's confusing" She got up and walked up and down in front of Kurt.
"Yes it is great, you're in love that's great. I already told you, you have to accept your feelings."
"And what if she doesn't like me? Or she likes her job more than me or I don't know!"
"She kissed you, I'm sure she likes you."
"You don't know that, maybe she just wanted to embarrass me or to try it one time?"
"You'll never find out when you don't talk to her."
"I'm not gonna talk to her!"
"You have to. She's your teacher and you'll see her tomorrow. And why wouldn't you talk to her? Maybe she feels the same."
"And what if not? Then I made a total fool out of myself!"
"Maybe you should not go over to her and say 'hi I love you'. You know, just a normal conversation."
"How's that gonna help? She'll still be my teacher."
"Yes, who cares? If you two are happy, then that's all that matters. You can't pretend forever that you don't have feelings for her."
"Why not Kurt, that would be so much easier..." She dropped next to Kurt on her bed and they were silent for a few minutes. "She was here."
"What?"
"She looked through my stuff and watched me sleeping."
"Wow that's almost as weird as stealing one of her posters." Kurt laughed.
"Finn came and she opened the door naked." She just said it like it was totally normal.
"What?!" Kurt sat up. "Why was she naked?"
"She wanted to try my clothes on."
"Does she know?"
"What?" She sat up too. "That you weren't asleep."
"I don't think so, when Finn came she tried to wake me up."
"That must have been... A crazy situation. What did Finn say?"
"We didn't talk that much, Cassandra acted like... You know... Something happened between us."
"Wow. I think she likes you." Rachel just raised an eyebrow. "Why else would she try to keep your ex boyfriend away from you?"
"She also wanted to talk and I said I want to pretend like there's nothing." Kurt looked concerned, because Rachel sounded sad. "And then she called me Schwimmer again!"
"You should talk to her."
"I know, I know!" But she didn't know what she should tell Cassandra. She actually did know what, just not how and she was afraid about Cassandra's reaction. "I should sleep now, I've to get up early tomorrow."
"Alright. I'll see you tomorrow. Goodnight." Kurt walked over to his bed and Rachel changed into shorts and a tank top.
She had a hard time to fall asleep, it was just too much on her mind and she almost cried, but she knew she had to talk to Cassandra and she had to talk to her dads. Eventually she fell asleep.
Rachel woke up shortly after 5am and growled, because she could have slept for another hour. She couldn't remember her dream, but she figured she must have had a wild dream, because her bed was all messed up. She decided to get up even though she already hated this day. After she made her bed and decided what she wanted to wear today, Rachel walked into the bathroom and took a shower. She smelled the coffee, and knew Kurt got up, so she got out of the shower and got ready.
"Good morning." Kurt was always an early bird, not like Rachel.
"Want some coffee?"
"Morning, nothing good with that and yes please."
"Wow someone got up on the wrong side of the bed." He handed her the coffee though.
"Thanks. I'm sorry." She gladly took the coffee and sipped on it.
"You're excited to go to school today?"
"Nope, actually terrified." He just shrugged and drank some of his coffee while he walked to the bathroom. Rachel drank her coffee, while she packed her stuff in a purse, took her phone and keys. "Kurt, I'm leaving!"
"Isn't that a little early?" He came out of the bathroom.
"I don't know what else to do and maybe I'll meet Brody."
"Alright, see you after school?" She knew that he wanted to know how it went.
"Okay." So she left and walked to the subway again. She hated the subway in the morning, it was always crowded, but it was better than driving. When she arrived at school, Rachel wanted to talk to Cassandra, but before a had a chance, she met Brody.
"Hey Rach." He smiled.
"Hi Brody, how was your weekend?"
"Well, I had some fun, what about you?"
"I...had fun too." Rachel knew she didn't sound convincing, but Brody didn't ask further questions.
"That's great for you. I wanted to ask you if you might want to go and drink a coffee or something with me?" She knew he asked her out.
"Oh god Brody... I like you, I really do, but I like someone else." She flushed and couldn't look him in the eye.
"Hey, that's okay, I totally understand that. I just though since you broke up, you know." He actually didn´t seem too upset, he even smiled at Rachel.
"I'm sorry."
"Don't be, just tell me when you change your mind." Rachel didn't know what to say to him or what to do. "I've to go to class. See you at lunch!"
"Yah, of course." Rachel just walked to her first class.
She had three classes before dance class and all she could think about was Cassandra. It was embarrassing, in her second class the teacher asked her something and when she realized it, because everybody was looking at her, she didn't know the answer. She thought it couldn't get any worse, but she was wrong.
When she walked into the dance class, Cassandra didn't even look at her.
"Warm up guys!" Cassandra turned the music on and stepped aside to watch her students. She did not once look at Rachel and she didn't call her Schwimmer or talked to her at all for that matter.
Rachel got pretty frustrated. How's she supposed to talk to Cassandra if she wasn't talking to her? The class ended and Rachel grabbed her stuff, but when she turned around she saw Cassandra leaving.
"This woman..." Rachel got angry and quickly followed her out, but didn't know where she'd gone and right now it was lunch time so she probably left the building.
"Great."
"What's great?" Brody appeared right next to her. "I'm wanted to talk to Ca-Miss July, but she already left..."
"Yeah she always does. You shouldn't talk to her today, she's kinda in a bad mood, you know." Yes, she knew.
"Do you know why?" They walked the cafeteria.
"No, rumor has is she got hurt, like you know..."
"What do you mean?"
"Well people say someone broke her heart, but I didn't know she was in a relationship, so I think it's just rumor. And we're at NYADA so someone's probably making a bigger drama out of it that it is." He just shrugged.
"I really need to talk to her, do you know where she went?" He looked stunned.
"Are you sure? I mean she'll be... You know. Herself."
"Yes I am sure, it's important." This time Rachel must have been convincing.
"You know the Starbucks three blocks away?"
"Yes."
"On the opposite there is a small café, I don't know what it's called, she usually spends lunch time there."
"Great thanks, Brody." She gave him a kiss on the cheek and headed off, but instantly regretted the kiss, because she didn't want to play with his feelings. Rachel found the café easily, but hesitated to go in. She waited outside and thought about what's she's going to do, when a man came out and held her the door open.
"Thanks." She wasn't really thankful, but had good manners.
"You're welcome." Rachel went inside, she looked around and saw Cassandra, sitting in the corner with her coffee and reading a book. Rachel decided to just walk over and sit with her and when she sat down Cassandra didn't even bother to look at her.
"What do you want?" She just kept reading her book.
"Can we talk?"
"We are."
"I mean ...do you like me?" Rachel flushed as hard as possible and thought she sounded like an insecure child. Cassandra read the page to the end and put a bookmark in it, before she closed it.
"I do. Are we finished talking?" Rachel did certainly not expect this reaction and Cassandra sounded honest and nice.
"I... I don't know ... what to say." Rachel was confused.
"Neither do I."
"What should we do now?"
"I don't know." Cassandra drank from her coffee, watching Rachel since she closed the book. "Why did you come?"
"I wanted to know."
"Why?" This felt like an interrogation to Rachel. Maybe she shouldn't have come.
"I don't know."
"I'm sure you do." And Rachel did, but she couldn't say it out loud, not here anyway.
"I like you."
"That's great for you." This conversation was completely dumb.
"You know what I mean..."
"What do you mean?"
"You actually want me to say it? Right here?"
"You don't have to say anything." Cassandra took her book and opened it again.
"Alright I'll say it! I think I'm in love with you." Rachel's voice died away.
"You know that's illegal." Rachel got frustrated with Cassandra acting so cold, when she knew she can be much nicer. That's why she took the book from Cassandra.
"I want to talk to you, not to a wall."
"I'm responding, so it's's not like you're talking to a wall." She grabbed her book back.
"Why do you make it so hard?"
"You wanted to pretended like nothing has happened."
"I was drunk and confused and... It was all new for me. I didn't even know I was gay!" That's the first time Rachel said it out loud.
"What do you want now? You want us to be in a relationship and after a while move together and after that get married, buy a house and get kids or what?" Cassandra sounded mad and hurt and Rachel didn't know what to say. "That's not what´s going to happen."
"I never said that, I don't know what I want."
"Well, you better find out soon." She opened her book again and started reading.
"I don't know what's gonna happen and I never said I wanted to move in with you or buy a house."
"I know you didn't."
"Why do you keep reading this damn book?!"
"Rachel-" Her voice was really calm and soft. "I'm seven years older than you and you're my student, what do you expect me to do?"
"I don't know, I just don't want to hide my feelings from you."
"Yea you can do that, but I can't."
"What do you feel for me?"
"I already told you." Cassandra didn't look in her eyes.
"You like me."
"That's what I said." Cassandra got annoyed and Rachel curious.
"How much?"
"What kind of question is that?" Cassandra looked in disbelieve at her.
"An easy one, you can like somebody like your student-"
"You are my student as a matter of fact." She closed her book by now and mentioned for the young waitress to get the bill.
"-like family or friends, it's not hard to tell somebody how much you like them."
"For some people it is, you know." They sat there in silence for a few moments, before Rachel got up.
"When you do know and you can admit it, let me know."
"Tell me what you want."
"I want to be with you." Cassandra smirked at Rachel but said nothing, so Rachel left. She figured Cassandra needed some time, even though it was weird, because she was the one who wanted to talk in the first place. She walked out of the café and headed home, she couldn't concentrate on school anyway.
Rachel was almost at the subway when she was grabbed from behind and turned around.
Cassandra smiled at her and kissed her.