Chapter IV
It's the nausea that wakes her the next morning and she curses under her breath as she makes her way across the hall and into the bathroom. She doesn't bother locking the door, or even seeing of it is closed properly, before she empties the contents of her stomach into the toilet bowl. Though she had been feeling unwell for a while now, today is the first time that she's been actually sick. She wants to cry, but she's too spend from yesterday's crying and her current situation that she can't bring a single tear to leave her eyes right this moment.
Sharon remembers the last time she had felt the urge to throw up, and she's confident she hadn't felt that crappy the last time around. She had been getting drunk at a party, with encouragement from Jack, Andy and Andrea, has no idea how she'd gotten home, recalls quite vividly the hours she had spent locked in the bathroom and had fallen asleep against the cold tiles of the bathtub. Sure, the headache and the spinning of the room every time she so much as moved her eyes had been horrible, but now, without those, her sole focus lies on her sore throat and the way her stomach contracts uncomfortably with every heave. Then, she had had her boyfriend and her parents to get her through the monstrous and unpleasant hangover that followed.
She doesn't have any of this now.
She finally does start crying, when her hair is lifted from her shoulders, clumsily tied into a loose braid, and a soft kiss is pressed into her hair. She can hear voices behind her, whispering about breakfast (which turns her stomach just thinking about) and excusing the both of them from school if necessary (which sounds rather incredible right about now). She lets the tears fall freely down her cheeks, doesn't care whether or not anybody hears her sobbing and blocks out the conversation she can still hear going on behind her. The next thing she consciously registers is footsteps leading down the hall and then the voices recede, and a wet cloths and a glass of water appear in front of her face and a calming, soothing presence drops down next to her on the floor.
No, she may not have her parents or Jack to help her through this, but what she has is so much better.
Yesterday, on their way back home, Andrea's mother had stopped at the girls' favorite Chinese restaurant, ordered a serving of their favorite food and then some more to have a decent selection for dinner. It will probably serve for a dinner of left-overs on Thursday, too. And then they had made a quick stop just around the corner from their house for Sharon to collect her thoughts and her courage to face the rest of the family. They had talked for a few minutes, in which Sharon had finally realized that now, when she has definite confirmation about her pregnancy, she has to at least talk to her parents to tell them that if nothing else will come from that conversation. The promise that she won't have to do it alone if she doesn't want to, helped her through that realization and she had once again been glad for the comfort she's getting from all around her.
During dinner, Sharon hadn't talked much about what had happened that afternoon. Neither Andrea nor her father had pushed her for information, knowing that she would be providing them as soon as she felt comfortable enough to talk about it. It had taken her halfway through their meal and a few laughs at the stories Andrea had to tell about what she had missed in debating and the few minutes after, where the blonde had, as per usual, met up with Andy again, but then, Sharon had taken a big breath, let it out in a sight and started talking. She had confirmed the pregnancy and that had been it, though. There had been no telling how that news affected her and what she was going to do, now that she knew for sure. Again, nobody pressured her into saying more. They would all be there for her, as soon as she was ready.
After dinner, Sharon had excused herself to the bathroom and went to change into more comfortable clothes. When she had stepped back into the living-room, Andrea's parents had retired into the study to give the teenagers some space and her friend had waited for her with tissues, a bunch of movies varying in genres, chocolate chip cookies and a tub of her favorite ice-cream. Andrea had wanted to be prepared for both the positive or the negative outcome of the doctor's appointment and, both the positive or negative reaction her friend might have to that. Sharon had looked rather happy when they entered the house and, as much as she hates to admit it, Andrea's first thought had been that the home test has shown a false positive. It's what she thought Sharon would have wanted, and it would make things a lot easier. After Sharon had admitted, that she was indeed pregnant, Andrea hadn't really know what to think anymore. She had learned pretty quickly though, that no matter what else should happen, her friend would not be abandoning the child.
It's father would probably not want anything to do with it, or her for that matter, but she hadn't cared (still doesn't), and Andrea had found that she was happy for her friend. It might not be what either of them had expected, but that didn't mean they couldn't make the best out of it.
In the end, they had decided on a horror film (big surprise) and had eaten their way through the cookies and the ice-cream both. The tissues had come in handy later, when the realization of what this all means had finally sunken in completely.
The girls had fallen asleep in each others arms like every night for the last week, after a thorough discussion about the fact, that Sharon will not have to do any of this alone and a good-natured threat should Andrea not be named god-mother.
It had helped, for Sharon closed her eyes with a smile on her lips and no tears streaming down her face anymore.
Still sitting on the floor in the bathroom, Sharon's grateful for her friend's help. Taking the washcloth, she wipes it over her face, relishing in the cool the damp fabric provides. Then she drains the water in a few large gulps and engulfs Andrea in a big hug. She's still crying.
For the next five minutes the blonde comforts her friend with soothing words and gentle touches, until Sharon pulls back and wipes her face with the washcloth again. Then she puts a smile on her face, a genuine one, because she's not sad but just rather incredibly overwhelmed with the situation.
They help each other up, laughing as Andrea stumbles over her own feet and almost ends up on the floor again and then Sharon's pushed in the general direction of the shower. "Are you up for school? My parents said it's okay to stay home if you wanted to" There is no question, that Andrea would stay home with her.
"No, I'm alright now, I think" An appreciative smiled engulfs her lips briefly, before she remembers why she needs to go to school today. "Would you...?"
"Of course" Andrea cuts her off with a nod of her head.
When the door to the bathroom closes, Sharon turns on the hot water in the shower before stripping out of her clothes. Today she's not brave enough to look at herself in the mirror and so she steps under the hot spray and closes her eyes. As soon as the water starts to cascade down her body she instantly feels better, the tension leaving her shoulders and the sick feeling in her stomach vanishes. Not even the strong smell of her strawberry body wash and matching shampoo changes that – just minutes ago the mere thought of food made her queasy and she had been afraid, that the smell of it would have the same effect. Seems like she hasn't hit that stage in her pregnancy yet, at least. She hears the door open and lets out a quick thank you that she's sure hasn't been heard over the running shower, and when the door closes again she thinks she might have heard a faint laugh and a you're welcome.
After her shower, Sharon dresses in the clothes Andrea had brought in for her earlier and when she drags the brush a last time through her hair, she feels like a human being again. She finishes her make-up in the bedroom, leaving the bathroom to her friend. She returns to the room just as the brunet is lacing up her black boots.
"Are you sure you want to do that today?" It's early enough in the pregnancy that there's time to sit back and take a breath before confronting the cheating ex-boyfriend.
Sharon stops with her second shoe half done and looks up at her friend. The look Andrea receives has her roll her eyes. "The longer I put this off, the more I lose my nerve and he needs to know." She drops her gaze back to her boots, doing up the finishing touches. When she gets up from the bed and casually pulls down her skirt back to a respectable length, she hears Andrea scoff behind her back.
The blonde's putting on the last touches to her make-up, watching her friend through the mirror searching for some thing or another between their joined schoolwork on the desk. "Does he really?" An eyebrow shoots up in question when Sharon whirls around on the spot and catches Andrea's eyes in the mirror. "It's not like he will want to be part of the baby's life" A non-committal shrug of her shoulders, and Andrea is back to applying her lip gloss.
"I'm guessing he can count" Sharon retorts sarcastically, and Andrea is sure she detects just that teeny bit of anger in her voice. She won't admit she probably knows what the problem is, she hasn't done anything wrong here. "He's probably telling whatever suits him best about me and our break-up, but the last thing I need is for him to think I'm a slut and going around telling people that" She stumbles over the word slut, spits out the last one as if she could choke on it if it doesn't leave her mouth fast enough, turns around and fetches her history assignment from the table behind her.
Andrea ties her hair back, still observing the other girls' every move. She doesn't get it, and before she can think about it, her mouth opens and she hears herself speak before her mind had even reached the conscious decision to actually say anything. "Does it really matter?" And she knows it's the wrong thing to say as soon as it leaves her lips. It's too late to take it back now, and she sees her friend's face fall slightly.
"I'm going down to have breakfast" She's not looking at Andrea at all as she grabs her bag from where she'd thrown it last night, stuffs her paper carelessly inside and heads for the door.
"Sharon..."
"You should hurry, we need to leave soon" And with that she lets the door fall shut behind her and heads down the stairs towards the kitchen. She knows Andrea didn't mean it, but it had still hurt. She's the good girl, always has been, of course it matters what other people think of her. Maybe not in every regard, but certainly when it comes to the status of her sexual partners and activities – especially when it is an outright lie.
She encounters the other girl's parents in the kitchen, sipping their coffees and reading the newspaper. She's instantly bombarded with questions about her well-being and if she doesn't want to stay home and if she needs anything and the genuine concern cheers her up instantly. She feels petty enough to wait for an apology from her friend before she makes that fact known, though. For that comment, Sharon thinks she deserves it.
Even though she doesn't feel like throwing up the non-existent contents of her stomach anymore, Sharon's not keen on a big breakfast and so she slumps down into her seat and debates not eating anything, when suddenly a cup of ginger tea and a slice of toast appears on the table in front of her. She's been told the tea's for the nausea, should she still feel it and the toast is probably all she can keep down at the moment. And once again, she's immensely grateful for the people around her.
Some small talk and a couple bites of her toast later, two arms come around her shoulders from behind and she senses lips softly touching the back of her head. She smiles, hides it before Andrea can see she's forgiven until she utters her apology. The two adults across the table just look at them in amazement and confusion. There had obviously been something they didn't know happened, but by the looks of it, whatever it was has been resolved already. Like adults.
"I'm sorry" the embrace tightens for a moment. "I didn't mean it like that" Another quick kiss to her hair "I love you" and Andrea is about to pull back, when Sharon's come up and hold the other girl in place for a moment longer.
"I know" Then she turns her head and places a soft kiss on Andrea's cheek. "I love you, too. Now sit down and eat, we're going to be late" She laughs at her friend's pout.
They have plenty of time before they have to leave for school, her upset stomach having woken Sharon a good hour before their alarm would haven gone off. Andrea ushers her parents out of the house after they'd finished eating. For once the teenagers would take care of the dishes and the kitchen before heading off, whereas there normally is no time for them to do more than gulp down a few sips of coffee or tea and maybe a bowl of cereal. Given recent changes in circumstances, Andrea suspects that her alarm will most likely be the thing that will wake them earlier than usual in the future. She likes her sleep, but she doesn't mind getting up earlier either, if it means being there for her friend.
With everything cleaned up and put away in its proper place they still have at least thirty minutes before they have to leave the house; and that would still put them at school ten minutes earlier than they usually arrive. With a bored sigh, Sharon takes out her cell.
"Is everything alright?" He picks up at the second ring and she has to smile at how adorably worried he sounds. She shakes her head, he's her best friend, and in no way adorable. "What happened?"
"Relax" She can't help the laugh that underlines her statement. She normally doesn't call him so early in the morning – at least not on a school day. "Nothing's happened, Andy" That's a lie, but she can't tell him that yet. Soon, maybe she'll even do it tomorrow, because she can't keep it to herself (and from him) any longer, but not yet. "Where are you?"
She can almost see him rolling his eyes at her question. "Well, since it's just past seven in the morning, believe it or not, I'm home" She knows it was a stupid question, but she likes hearing him all sarcastic.
"Are you almost ready to leave?" She has no idea, why she just comes out with what she wants from him, but the longer she drags it out, the longer she gets to talk to him. Another stupid thing, since she'll see him in school soon enough, but she also really likes talking with him.
"Wasn't planning to, but I could be" She hears him get up from where ever he has been sitting, presumably to finish getting dressed – or to get breakfast. She almost pleads it's the latter, because the last thing she needs right now is thinking about Andy, half naked, probably still in bed. The fact that he could be talking on the phone with her like that makes it even worse. "Why?" She hears him ask. He's curious but he seems to have calmed down from his earlier worried state.
"We'll drive by the coffee shop by Andrea's house on our way, meet us at school in fifteen?" It's a question, he doesn't have to if he can't make it that early. But she's also pretty certain, that he will be there. In all the time they have been close she still has to see the day when Andy Flynn actually says no to anything Sharon suggests. She hangs up the phone with a smile, without waiting for his answer.
Grabbing her jacket and her back from the living-room she meets Andrea by the front door. The blonde's ready to go, having hear her friend talking to Andy, and pockets her phone with a smile of her own before leaving the house. They talk about trivial things on their way to the coffee shop and Andrea doesn't say anything when they stand in line, but when Sharon orders their three usual beverages, the girl sheepishly adds a fourth one to the list.
A raised eyebrow and a knowing smirk is all she receives, but she still feels the need to explain herself. "I might have asked Emma if she wants to join us. That's okay, isn't it?" she adds, even though it hadn't been the last few days.
"I told you" Sharon starts while paying for their coffees "your girlfriend is always welcome" They move down the counter to wait for their purchases, Sharon with a teasing glint in her eyes.
"I believe we had this discussion just a few days ago" Their first cup arrives and Sharon, realizing it's hers, removes the lid and dumps a shitload of sugar into it. Andrea scrunches up her nose.
"Doesn't mean I don't like to tease you about it" The second one is presumably Emma's since Sharon never ordered one of them, yet, and Andrea pulls it towards her and takes a few packages of sugar and cream from the bowl next to her. She'd need one of them for herself and maybe Emma would, too.
"You called your boyfriend first" Sharon slides Andrea's cup in front of her when it appears before her.
"I believe we had this discussion just a few days ago" Andy's coffee gets the same treatment as Sharon's had earlier, except the girl empties two creams into the mix - effectively rendering everything Andrea could have said needless. Not even she knows how Andy drinks his coffee.
When they leave the cafe Sharon is sufficiently distracted from what she's set out to do later that day. She doesn't want to confront Jack in school, but in all honesty, she has no intention of being alone with him anywhere ever again. The free period they are all assigned today so the members of the soccer team won't miss class while attending a last minute training session for the big game tomorrow seems like the best time to talk to him. Andy would be at practice, along with most of Jack's friends, so he won't question why she's not spending the hour with them. Andrea knows, and Emma doesn't know her good enough yet, to know that Sharon and Andrea spend every free period together – and if she did, Andrea was sure to distract her from the fact easily.
Since Sharon had ceased to spend time in places they had used to hang out together, Jack hadn't felt the need to do the same. That makes it pretty easy for Sharon to find him and if she's correct in her assumption they will be completely alone for the conversation she doesn't want to have.
But she has to do it today, if only for the fact, that she wants (needs) to tell Andy and she's still set on telling nobody else until the father has heard about it and from her, not from rumors and talk. He might have been an ass and let her walk in on a scene she rather not have seen, but as much as she may hate him for that, she will not stoop down to his level of immaturity.
She parks the car near the entrance since they are early enough to have the choice of almost all parking spaces the school has to offer. They spot Andy and Emma just a few meters away, already waiting. When the girls arrive Emma gets up from the top step she has been sitting on, hugs them both briefly and gladly accepts the hot cup Andrea passes her way. She is about to ask what she owes Sharon, remembers that she has learned that there is only one of them paying for all beverages when they are out – no exceptions; her turn will come soon - and thanks her instead. Andy kisses both girls on the cheek, takes a sip from the coffee Sharon hands him and with a smile slides down the wall to reclaim his seat besides where Emma is now standing in conversation with Andrea.
"So what's this all about?" He takes Sharon's hand in his, laces their fingers together and tucks her down to sit before him. She makes herself comfortable between his legs and leans back against his chest when his arms come around her waist. There is no way of convincing someone who won't know that they aren't a couple, that they really weren't. Especially with that smile adorning both their faces. But today, Andrea will let it slide, because she's sitting thigh to thigh with the girl she has a crush on, with said girl's head leaning on her shoulder while they are in conversation.
"Nothing" Sharon answers him, playing with their tangled hands in her lap. "We were just up already and bored at home" She shrugs her shoulders nonchalantly and takes a sip of her coffee.
"Yea, right" Emma speaks up from Andrea's shoulder. She can't stifle her yawn, she lives close enough to school that, on normal days, this would be the time her alarm goes off. "That's why we're having coffee on the front steps of our high school forty-five minutes before we're even supposed to be here" She doesn't mind being here, wouldn't be if she did, and her three companions know that.
"Neither of you was forced to be here" Sharon pouts, so incredibly fake that she can't suppress the smile hiding underneath. She startles when she feels Andy move behind her as if to get up.
"Oh good" His arms leave her waist and instead wander to her shoulders to push her carefully off his chest. "I'll see you later then" When he shifts again behind her she puts the cup she's still holding next to his and grabs the hands on her shoulders into hers. Pulling them back around her body, she leans back into his body and slides down just enough so her head fits perfectly under his chin.
"Jerk" she mutters just loud enough for Andrea and Emma to hear her, too and making them all laugh. Andy presses a kiss into her hair and hands her his half empty coffee while he takes a sip out of hers. At that, Emma's eyes land on Andrea and ask a silent question. They are not a couple? Andrea's answer is just as silent. No. At least not officially – or that they are aware of.
This time, when they are required to enter the building for classes, they do it later than they normally would and part ways just inside the front door; all four of them making just a quick stop at their lockers, with plans to, as usual, meet back up for lunch. The first half of the day passes as uneventful as almost every day – and even though it's still incredibly childish, Sharon enjoys pissing off Jack a little bit more than any other day. She dreads the conversation with him nonetheless and almost prays lunch won't come.
But it does – and much to her chagrin, passes way too quickly. She's completely not prepared at all when Andy suddenly leans over, places a kiss on her cheek and vanishes in the crowd that's heading towards the soccer field. Andrea squeezes her hand from across the table in encouragement. Their eyes meet briefly and they have a whole conversation without speaking a single word, but in the end Sharon sticks with her initial plan. She has to do this alone. So with a deep breath she tells the girls to have fun (but not too much) and leaves the cafeteria.
She finds him exactly where she expected him to be. Cocky as he is, he leans against the far wall of the school building, in the exact spot they used to sneak off to to make out, a cigarette hanging from his lips. She has no idea when he started smoking, but technically she doesn't care either. She's just glad he's here and, more importantly, alone. When she steps out into his field of vision he seems surprised for a moment, before he masks his emotions again.
"I thought we weren't doing this anymore" He snarls around his cigarette, one eyebrow raised suggestively.
"We're not" Her glare is almost deadly but he used to be with her almost every day for the last four years, he's not intimidated by it anymore. She opens her mouth to go on, but he stumps out his cigarette and, turning to face her fully, cuts off her words.
"I won't mind though. At least I won't get slapped this time, it's not like I'd be cheating on somebody" His lips actually twists into a grin at that. She balls her hands into fists to prevent exactly this from happening. She's not the violent type, but she's hit him once and felt better after it, so whose to say it won't work a second time.
"You're an ass"
"I believe you already knew that" She sees him fiddling with the lighter in one hand and the pack of smokes in the other. He's frustrating enough that she has the fleeting thought of asking if she could have one. "So what do you want?"
"I need to talk to you" Seriously? That's what she came up with? It's pretty obvious that she did not come here to make out, so what else was she here for than to talk?
"So talk" He lights another cigarette and this time she almost asks. She doesn't smoke, never really thought about starting, but it would give her something to do other than entwining and releasing the fingers of her left and right hand over and over. She's heard it helps calm nerves, too.
"I'm pregnant" She doesn't see the good in dragging it out any longer. She's here, he's here and that's what she came here for after all. Also, she wants to spend as little time with him as possible, so the faster she got to the point, the better.
She watches his face for any sign of something but it doesn't change.
"Congratulations" He's completely impassive. She knew he wouldn't care but she had hoped for a little more reaction than that.
"That's all you have to say?" The freaking cigarette moves in between his lips as he takes a drag and holds in in his lungs while contemplating her. When she lets out his breath she is ready to punch him, or at least slap the burning stick out of his mouth. He takes another drag before finally answering her.
"What am I supposed to say? My ex-girlfriend and my ex best friend having a baby together before they're even out of High School. I don't know how that concerns me" He leans more comfortably against the wall, the offending cigarette still hanging from his lips. He's doing that on purpose she realizes.
"Andy's not..." She starts, trying to figure out if he really believes what he just said or if he's just shoving his inconvenient problem onto someone else. "This baby is yours" There's no easy way to do it. No matter what he believes – or doesn't – she won't leave here until he knows he's going to be a father. What he plans to do with that information, she frankly doesn't care, as long as she won't have to directly deal with him.
"How am I supposed to know that that's true?" For a moment she stares at him, wide eyed, unbelieving. A moment later she realizes, that he, in fact, does know that it's true but as long as he denies it, it's his word against hers. And she has no doubt, that the moment he starts spreading those rumors, people would believe him; she and Andy have always been way too close for people not to.
"Are you kidding me right now" She tries to stay as calm as she possibly can. When she looses her temper, he wins and though she's not entirely sure what they are competing over, she can't let him win. "I caught you, in this exact place, with your tongue down some other girl's throat and you accuse me of cheating? While I have been nothing but faithful to you?" This conversation is not at all going like she planned it would. She just hopes it doesn't last any longer.
"Again, how do I know that that's true?" This time she is close enough to slap the still burning cigarette out of his fingers, her own just mere millimeters away from his cheek. It's not nearly what he deserves, but surely her hand will appreciate it a great deal better than another slap to his face.
"You really are an ass" And with that, she turns around and leaves him standing there. She did what she came here to do. He's been told about the baby, told that it's his. He won't be blind-sighted when she'll ultimately start showing; when she can't hide it anymore. There was never anything else this conversation was supposed to establish. No friendship, no arrangement or agreement and quite certainly no rekindling of their relationship.
She just needed him to know, and now that he did, she can go on with her life – completely without him.