Hey there awesome nerds! So again I haven't updated in a long time and again it's been school and I'm deeply sorry for not updating. I've also rewritten this chapter around 4 times but I'm pretty happy with it now! It's the Easter holidays now so I'm promising you guys two more chapters after this one within the next couple weeks. I'm crazy excited because this fic has almost 100 people following it and that's just amazing and thank you all! Every email I get when someone favourites or follows the fic really keeps me going when I think I should stop. Feel free to message me if you wanna talk, I'm here for all of you! Now I'm going to end this seemingly endless author's note! Please follow, favourite and review!
For the first time in over a year, Beca had slept a full night. There were no nightmares, no waking up in a cold sweat. The brunette was more than relieved to find that when she woke up, there was the warmth of Chloe's body behind her, with one of the redheads arms draped lazily around her stomach. Beca, though accompanied by the redhead, wasn't completely sure what had happened the night before.
It wasn't until she moved her right arm and felt a sharp pain that it all came back to her. The tears, the drink, the missed calls. The whole night flashed before Beca's eyes and she didn't realise it, but she was crying now, not the hysterics from the night before though. A few tears just snaked out of Beca's eyes. All she could think about is how Chloe would leave her after seeing how much of a freak she was. Or how much of a freak the voices where telling her she was. Again Beca was broken from her thoughts when she felt Chloe's hand close around her own and bring it up to her lips, placing a light kiss on Beca's knuckles.
"Morning Red." Beca said, trying not to sound like she'd been crying.
"Good Morning Becs, sleep well?" Chloe said. The sleepiness in her voice giving Beca butterflies. A small smile crept onto Beca's face and she nodded, and for a change she wasn't lying.
The brunette and the redhead just lay in comfortable silence for while after that. Beca was thinking about how, for some reason, Chloe was like this all powerful cure to her. How just hearing the redhead's voice silenced the ones in her head. Chloe was asking Beca questions in her head, mostly: Why?
"You know Becs, I'm al-"
"Don't say it. Never say it, because everyone leaves Chlo'. Every. Single. Person. They all realise how much of a freak I am and they leave. Even if you try and stay you will be sick of me within weeks. I've got my hopes up before and it's just been crushed. Even if you are helping, you'd probably never actually see it. I could go months without running a razor across my skin but if I suddenly do, you'll blame yourself for not being able to stop it and then you'll fall with me. Once you've fallen like that you will do anything to avoid feeling so shit, and then you'll leave to get away from it." Beca said. The subtle anger that was in her voice scared Chloe, because she knew Beca actually believed that the redhead would leave her.
"Look Beca, I'm no therapist. However I can promise you one thing. I will listen to anything you have to say and I will care. I won't leave you as long as I'm alive, I know we're not together or anything but I will never leave you okay? I will always be there for you. I will stay the night when you're down, I'll bring you pizza from that pizzeria when you don't feel like going out. I will do all the big things and the little things to help you with no questions asked okay? I will help you in any way I can Beca. You're an amazing person." Chloe said, smiling at Beca who had turned over to look at her, their faces inches apart.
For a few moments their gazes simply locked. Beca's steely blue eyes exploring Chloe's deep blue ones. Beca could hear the near silent whisper of voices in the back of her mind, the sound slowly getting louder until she could make out two words.
She's lying.
With this, Beca's head dropped. Chloe placed two fingers under Beca's chin and lifted her head back up.
"Wait here, I'll be right back okay?" Chloe said with a reassuring smile. Beca nodded shyly in return and Chloe got out of bed, pushing the sheets so Beca wasn't uncovered. She got to the door and looked back at Beca with an excited smile and the brunette couldn't help but grin at the site. With every second that passed, Beca was getting more and more worried that Chloe wouldn't come back. Until a few minutes later, the redhead came back into the room, holding the purple cuddly dragon in one hand and a small pair of sewing scissors in the other.
"What are you doing Chlo'?" Beca said with concern in her voice. Chloe sat down next to Beca, cross-legged with the dragon between her legs. Chloe held one of the wings and looked at the thick purple thread that followed the edges. The redhead hooked the scissors under one of the stiches and cut the thread.
"Chlo' what the hell!" Beca snapped, only to have Chloe smile like a child.
"Don't worry Beca, it's only decorative stitching and I'm only taking a little. Trust me okay?" Chloe said. Beca reluctantly allowed Chloe to remove multiple stiches, resulting in the redhead holding a rather large amount of thread in her fingers, she then expertly tied the remainder and then started fiddling with the spare thread whilst talking to Beca.
"Right, so what I'm doing now is I'm making you something okay? I'm making you something that I'll have one of as well and if you ever feel down, and I'm not there. You can use it to remember that, for as long as you're wearing it, I will always be there for you." Chloe said whilst now rhythmically moving her fingers around the thread. "Hand." Chloe said sweetly. Beca obeyed and lifted her left arm. "No the other one." She demanded.
"Why?" Beca replied, confused.
"I know it sounds like I over thought this but you're left handed and what you did last night, you did to your right arm, so it makes more sense?" Chloe said, almost as if she had rehearsed the conversation. Which the redhead knew she definitely had not.
"But why does that matter?" Chloe took a moment before replying as she focused on tying the neatly plaited thread around the brunette's wrist.
"Because if you roll up your sleeve, or even look at your arm and consider it. You will see it and I'm hoping that when you do, it will remind you I'm always there for you and you'll at least call me, or even just think of calling me." Chloe said, tying the final perfect knot.
"Oh wow Chloe! It looks amazing!" Beca said, in awe of Chloe's expert plaiting. If Beca hadn't of known Chloe was in college, she would have thought it was her job or something.
"I used to make them all the time when I was a kid." Chloe said smiling and looking at Beca, who was still looking down at her bracelet and fiddling with it. Chloe's face dropped when she saw a few tears snaking out of Beca's eyes. Until Beca looked back of course, because Chloe found that Beca had her signature cheesy grin. Bringing a cute laugh and an adorable smile from Chloe in return, which made Beca melt inside. For the second time that day, the girls found themselves staring into each other's eyes. Completely mesmerised by the feelings they had. They both felt like they could be there forever, like there was no one else in the world but the two of them.
Most importantly, Beca felt safe.
. . .
The two spent the rest of the day listening to music and talking about nothing, the day flew by and it was basically perfect. Beca smiled every time she looked at her little connection to the redhead and it was already helping her, every extra second she spent with Chloe she trusted her that little bit more. The redhead she had slipped her number to only a few nights before was breaking down the almost impenetrable walls that she had built to keep others out, and she wouldn't have it any other way. Quite frankly, Beca was in awe of the redhead. Everything was perfect about her. She was kind, friendly, cheerful, bubbly and Beautiful. Oh so beautiful.
"Becaaaaa? Is anyone there?" Chloe asked, giggling. Beca hadn't realised but she was staring, and for a while by the sound of it.
"I uhh… well... urmm…" Beca stammered, lost for words. The brunette's face turned crimson as she dipped her head in embarrassment. Chloe cupped Beca's cheek and lifted the smaller girls head. There is was again, the two girls staring at each other. They had exchanged glances for the whole day, but this one was different. They were locked in each other's eyes and they could swear they were getting closer. Their faces where merely two inches apart. Chloe could feel Beca breathe against her lips and it sent shivers down her spine. Then the worst thing happened.
Her phone starting ringing.
It was Aubrey who was calling and when Chloe answered the phone, Beca sat back a little, in shock from may have almost happened. She had to hold back a childish grin when she heard Chloe talking to Aubrey like a teenage boy being embarrassed by his mum.
"Yeah… uh huh… okay… sorry… sorry Aubrey… okay... talk soon… bye." The last words coming out a lot more desperate than she'd meant them to.
"I'm guessing you have to go now?" Beca said, her face dropping.
"Hey, don't forget your bracelet okay? It's pretty late now and Aubrey want's me home. I'll text you the second I'm there, okay Beca?" Chloe said smiling at Beca, reassuring her. Beca nodded and pulled the older girl into a tight hug. Beca wasn't one to initiate physical contact so this was a big thing for her and Chloe respected that. After a while Chloe stood, gathered her things and just before she left, Beca gave her a key.
"It's for this apartment, you're welcome any time." Beca smiled as she spoke.
"Thank you Beca, no doubt I'll want to spend more time you soon enough." Chloe said, making Beca grin.
"Go on red, get home before Aubrey shoots you." Beca said brushing Chloe away.
"Bye Beca!" Chloe shouted as she was walking away down the hallway.
"Bye sexy redhead!" Beca shouted in return, giving Chloe a mock salute before closing her apartment door. The brunette walked around the apartment, cleaned up a little and then went into the bathroom which Chloe had cleaned up earlier that day. She got ready for bed and once she was laying under the cool, crisp sheets. She let herself think. And it was entirely about the redhead that had burst into her life less than 4 days before.
"Maybe it's all going to be okay..." Beca whispered to herself, drifting into a calm, dreamy sleep.
So everyone here's the chapter that took 6billion days to write, sorry again! I'll keep my promise and I'll see you guys soon and thank you! Farewell awesome nerds" I love you all!