A few days pass and all we really have time for is rehearsal. I help some with the stagecraft people too, so I don't do much beside sleep eat and act. And that's just how I love it. Except I wish I could actually talk to Jade instead of Walter talking to Nancy. And before I know it, we're putting on makeup for opening night. I pull out my adhesive for the mustache from a box, and start humming.
Jade comes in with her blonde wig on (she must have gotten here earlier to do makeup, I'm not supposed to be using any) and gasps. She says half in her Nancy voice, half in her mocking me voice. "My, what is a strapping man doing in the lady's dressing room?"
"I do not sound like that!"
"I know, I just enjoy that voice. I like saying everything ridiculously innocent in it. And you just happen to be ridiculously innocent, especially when I want to mock you."
"Well, couldn't you have told me that before? Also, I am not ridiculously innocent."
"Sometimes."
"I'm optimistic."
"Yes you are Walter. To think I'd believe my own husband is not ridiculously innocent."
At that, I just continue humming. And Jade sings along.
"So now my heart is battered like a shield
Growing tougher every time it heals"
"Hey, I thought you said you hadn't heard of Lauren Hoffman!"
"I hadn't. But then the other day this ridiculously innocent girl sang a few songs by her, and I looked all of them up. Interplanetary Traveler though? I mean, it's a good song, but it's really about moving from home to home, not about being an astronaut."
If it weren't minutes till the show and I had a softer object to throw at her, I would. But I settle for laughing instead.
The play ran through without a hitch. Except for my racially different twin sons. Non-discrimination has to end somewhere, Sikowitz. And then they show up. I have to warn Tori. "It's them… It's them! What do we do?"
"Run. Run, Nancy."
"Yes Walter!"