TIME FOR THE MISSION WAHOOOOOOOOO (You sound like a gaiboi) :/ leave me alone stop butting in this Is my time to talk to the reader. (You think that don't you? Well guess what… I brought someone else along… mwhahaha) Who… oh god.. please not… HWE ARE SO HAPPEE TO FINALLEEY MEEET YUH!... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

++++ Begin Transmission ++++

"CHARGE!"

"FOOOOOOOOLS don't charge there is a secret entrance that only I know of!"

"…. How do you know about this?"

"I served Tzneetch… not to mention I used to stalk the ever living hell out of Macha…"

"yuh are creepee… hwe dunt know eeef hwe leik yuh anymoar"

"SO JUDGEMENTAL!"

Oh my god these guys are hopeless….

"Whatever take us to the entrance!"

Oh my god who would have thought the sunlight on these craftworlds would suck so much ass. Like seriously not to mention walking on this grass… I don't like it. I hate being outside…

"Bot beeneeng outseede ees so nicee!"

"Yeah you shut in, only fools and cowards stay inside all the time."

"LEAVE ME ALONE YOU GELATINOUS BLOB!"

Finally… we are inside. I don't know why there's no guards… like you think the most powerful being in the galaxy would have a bodygau- HOLY FUCK!

"INTRUDERS! HOW DARE YOU STEP FOOT ON CRAFTWORLD ULTHWE!"

"RUNNNNNNNNNNN!"

"hwy?! nd hwy ees that guy on feere?"

"FOOOOOOLS that is an Avatar of Khaine! That's why there has been no bodyguards!"

"AHHHHHH SHIIIIITTTTT!"

"FACE ME IN HONOURABLE BATTLE YOU COWARDS! I CHALLENEGE YOU!"

(Hey Marcus get him outside!)

"How the hell are you talking to me?!"

(Communicator dumb-shit. Get him outside I have a present for him.)

"Guys we gotta go outside!"

"FOOOLZ THAT IS WHERE THE RANGERS WILL SNIPE US!"

"nuh I heerd hees talk weeth the sheep!"

"Yeah Machine Spirit says he has a present for the Avatar."

"Mwhahahahah I apologize for calling you a fool. OUTSIDE WE GO!"

"YOU COWARDS STAND AND FIGHT ME!"

I thought us 'Nids were supposed to be bad ass running fighting machines. But im so tired. Listener, if I die…. Tell my mother…. That she's a bitch for letting me be so weak.

"Stop! This position is perfect!"

"All of you inside me!"

"uh…. What"

"hwy wuld hwe do that."

"JUST DO IT!"

Ew this is so gross. I'm inside a chaos blob… I have no idea how Cultist and I haven't fainted…

"Eeet's called plut armer!"

"Uh… whatever."

(BRACE YOURSELVES MWHAHAHAHAHAHAH)

++++ Static ++++

As Marcus, Clutist, and Junus were standing about 15 meters away from the Avatar of Khaine the Inquisitorial ship fired a salvo from one of its lesser gun batteries. As the rounds went shot through the atmosphere they collided with the Avatar's chest sending molten shards of Avatar all over the vicinity.

"HOLY HELL THAT WAS AWESOME!"

"wow thet woz crezey."

"FOOOOOLZ NOW IS OUR CHANCE!"

Okay listener guess what… we found his daughter… Asleep. HOW THE HELL DO YOU SLEEP THROUGH ALL THAT?!

"Machine Spirit we got her."

(PREPARE FOR TELEPORTATION!)

++++ Static ++++

God that shit sucks so much. Never again I swear.

"So did hwe ween?"

"Hell yeah we did."

"FOOOOOLZ she's waking up…."

"Uh… Oh hello. You guys must be the ones dad said were gonna kidnap me."

Oh shit what?!

"hwat do yuh meen?"

(Uh… guys. Incoming call from… ah shit.. Eldrad.)

"Why hello Marcus, I bet you noticed your attack was a little too easy wasn't it? Did you even bother to see WHICH daughter you took?"

"Uh… no we didn't."

"FOOOOOOOOOLZ THAT IS MACHA! WE NABBED THE WRONG ONE… well at least for you guys. This means I get to stalk her some more… huehuehuhue."

"Uhm… do I know you from somewhere, your voice is really familiar, but I'd never be friends with an ugly blob."

"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH."

"Hey Marcus, pay attention. You kidnapped my daughter in an attempt to 'Troll' me, correct?"

"Yes we did."

"Why is that?"

"Well see, I was created after some Eldar was absorbed by the hive mother and they're soulstone was absorbed as well. So when we were looking for something to do, a voice just said 'time to pay Eldrad back for years of humility.'"

"GUFFAW! I know exactly who you are old friend. Alright well guess what? Unless you want me to psychically destroy all of you, yes including you Machine Spirit, then LISTEN UP. My daughter was born for ONE single purpose. Do you know what that is?"

"OOOH can I tell them papa?"

"NO SHUTTUP!"

"Ah… okay papa.."

"Yuh shuld nut talk to yor cheeldren leik that."

"Chaos wench stay out of this, my business is with Marcus."

"Hwe are Marcees' freneeds eef yuh have beesnuss weeth Marcees yuh have beesness weeth us."

"Ugh if it'll get you to shuddup then fine whatever… HEY STOP GRINNING! Ugh. Whatever, Marcus your new mission is to help Macha fulfill her purpose."

"Well… what's her purpose?"

"HAHAHAHA Do you really expect me to tell you? That would make the story for your listeners on that Datapad of yours WAAAAAAY to boring."

"But papa that's not very nice."

"MACHA I SAID BE QUIET! DON'T TALK TILL IM DONE HERE!"

"Oh… okay."

"Ahem, if you succeed Marcus, I'll reward you handsomely. Trust me you'll LOVE the reward I have in mind for you."

"Well… okay if you say so. But I don't trust you Eldrad."

"Good boy, you should never trust me."

"HWY ARE YUH GEEVENG HEEM THAT EVEEL LOOK!"

"Ugh… I'm hanging up, bye. Remember what I Said Marcus."

God what a dick.

Back on Craftworld Ulthwe

Eldrad put a grin on his face and laughed. "Just as planned…"

++++ Transmission Ended ++++

DID YOU ENJOY IT?! I sure hope so. So let me explain how I write this story… I sit down when I'm bored… freewrite it… and then post it. I POST IT RAW AND UNCUT (Stop trying to be clever your sense of humor is piss-poor bitch boy.) :/ leave me alone Machine Spirit you're such a bully….