Chapter Eight

"Awwww, you're so snuggly wuggly," the Tenth Doctor said as he held the tiny fluffy white kitten in his hands. "And you're just the perfect little accomplice for the prank I'm going to play on Rose. Let me just put this tiny speaker behind your head," he said as he gently parted the long white hair on the mewling kittin and affixed a tiny microchip sized speaker to the skin behind her head.

The Doctor picked up the kitten, held her close and chuckled when the kitten sniffed his nose.

"Yes, you're the perfect helper for my little plan," he said while the kitten batted his nose and mewed. "Come my little friend, time to put my prank into action."

XOXOXOXOXXOXOXOXOX

Rose was sitting in the lounge, watching TV when she suddenly saw something coming into the room out of the corner of her eye. She looked over and her eyes widened with delight when she saw the cutest white kitten come into the room.

"Look at you then," Rose said, rising up and walking over to her. "You're adorable. Where'd you come from?"

"Rose!"

Rose stopped short when she heard the Doctor's voice coming from the kitten.

"Rose, it's me!"

"Doctor?" Rose said, kneeling down. "What's going on?"

"I did a mind transfer to see if I could do it," the Doctor said while the kitten came over to Rose and sniffed her fingers. "I was successful. I put my mind into this kitten."

"How can I hear you then? You're not talking," Rose said.

"TARDIS is allowing me to telepathically communicate with you," the Doctor said. "It's just a temporary thing, mind. I will put my mind back in my own body in a moment but I just wanted to see what it was like to be a kitten. Pick me up, will you?"

Rose picked the kitten up and the kitten mewed.

"Ah, I can speak but the TARDIS is having a bit of trouble translating," the Doctor said as the kitten mewed in her hands. "I suppose I'll just have to rely on the telepathic communication. Anyway, here I am, Kitty Doctor."

"Aw, you're so cute," Rose said, taking the kitten back to the sofa. "You should always stay like this."

"Nah, too small," the Doctor said. "I like my big body, thanks."

Rose sat down and put the kitten down beside her. The kitten walked over to a pillow at the end of the sofa, rose up and put her paws on it.

"Let's see what's up here then," the Doctor said while the kitten climbed it.

Rose watched while the kitten climbed over it to the arm of the sofa. The kitten then climbed up onto the top of the sofa and walked along it.

"Look at me, I'm a daredevil!" the Doctor crowed while the kitten walked along the top towards Rose. "Wow, I'm really agile."

The kitten walked over to Rose's face while she watched the kitten and sniffed her nose.

"Wow, you smell good. Put on a bit of perfume today?" the Doctor said while the kitten sniffed her face.

"Um…no, just had a shower," Rose said.

"Mmmm," the Doctor said when the kitten came close and began to rub her face with hers. "Yes, this is lovely. Nice and soft, eh?"

"Yes," Rose said, loving the feel of the kitten's fur against her face.

The kitten carefully got down on Rose's shoulder. Rose watched while the kitten walked off her shoulder onto her chest.

"Oh yeah, this is definitely the place to be then," the Doctor said while the kitten walked around in a circle on Rose's chest. "Never been here before, at least not like this."

"Doctor, behave yourself," Rose said.

"Ooo, comfy," the Doctor said while the kitten lay down on her chest and kneaded her breast with her paws. "Oh yeah…this is the best."

"Doctor, stop that!" Rose said.

"Stop what, Rose?"

"Stop…touching my breast," Rose said.

"I'm just sleepy and making myself a nice little pillow here," the Doctor said while the kitten yawned and lay her head down on Rose's breast. "Comfy pillow, right here."

Rose made a face when the kitten's bum ended up pointing at her face.

"Doctor, think you could move a bit so your bum isn't in my nose?" Rose said, trying to gently push the back end of the kitten away from her face.

"Okay, okay, I'm going," the Doctor said when the kitten got up. "Sheesh, want a comfy pillow, that's all. Oh, what's down here?"

Rose's eyes widened when the kitten moved down her body towards her crotch.

"This is definitely a view I've never had before," the Doctor said while the kitten stepped down on her leg. "Can I have a kip right here?"

"No, you may not," Rose said, picking up the kitten.

"Bollocks, I'm just doing what kittens do. Put me down, you meanie!" the Doctor said when the kitten mewed and tried to squirm out of her grasp.

"Alright, alright, I'm doing it!" Rose said, setting the kitten on the ground.

"Meanie old Rose," the Doctor said while the kitten walked away towards the TV. "Doesn't let me sleep on her comfy pillows and holds me roughly. I don't think I'll let you have this kitten when I'm give its mind back to it and ooo…what's behind here then?" the Doctor said as the kitten went behind the TV. "Wow, it's dirty back here, don't you ever clean, Meanie Old Rose?" he added from behind the TV set.

"Whatever, Doctor," Rose said, rolling her eyes.

"Phew, that was perilous," the Doctor said as the kitten came out the other side of the TV. "My body needs a good washing now from all the dust and filth back there," he added when the kitten sat down and began to lick its right front paw. "And mum always said to clean behind your ears," he said when the kitten rubbed her wet paw behind her ear.

Rose watched while the kitten cleaned itself. Then she had an idea. She took off her shoe and unthreaded the shoelace. She put her shoe down and stood up with the shoelace.

"Doctor, look," she said as she walked towards the kitten, wiggling the shoelace.

"Rose, you wouldn't," the Doctor said when the kitten stopped cleaning and watched the shoelace with interest. "How dare you torment me like that? I won't lower myself to chasing the shoelace. I just won't, I tell you!"

"Come and get it, Doctor," Rose said, standing near the kitten and jiggling the shoelace in the air.

The kitten stood and watched it and then crotched.

"No, urge to bat at the shoelace, too strong. Must resist!" the Doctor said in a strangled voice while the kitten crouched and watched the shoestring intently. "No, you little hussy! How dare you tempt me like this. Noooooo!" the Doctor howled when the kitten sprang and began to bat furiously at the shoelace. "You vixen! You humiliated me! I can't stop playing with the shoelace, it's too tempting! I can't stop, nooooooo!"

While Rose was laughing and watching the kitten bat at the string and try to grab it, the real Doctor silently walked into the room, carrying a microphone in his hands.

"No, you torment me!" he said into the microphone.

Rose froze when she realized the Doctor's voice was coming from behind her as well as from the kitten. She turned and the Doctor grinned and waved.

"Congratulations, Rose," he spoke into the microphone, "you fell for the Doctor's Mind in a Kitten Practical Joke! The oldest trick in the book and you didn't doubt it for a moment."

"You arsehole!" Rose said and the Doctor ran out of the room when Rose tried to grab at him. "I shoulda known you were winding me up! You git, get away from me for the rest of the day!"

She turned around and let the Doctor get away while she turned her attention back to the kitten who was now batting at the shoelace that Rose dropped when she confronted the Doctor.

"You poor thing, the Doctor was using you," Rose said in a sweet voice as she walked over to her. "Well, you just stay here with me; I'll protect you from him."

She smiled grabbed the end of the shoelace and wiggled it around the floor, chuckling while the kitten batted at it and tried to catch it.