"Do you have to leave?" Draco's fingers traced hers as she sat on the edge of the bed.
She smiled as she pulled her jacket back over her shoulders. "I have to get back to my dormitory. I have an early class tomorrow. We could meet by the lake at lunch and I could help you with a few spells… if you like." Her cheeks flushed that familiar rosy red and Draco felt that light feeling in his stomach.
"I would."
"Good I was thinking we could start with what we're learning now and go back to-"
Draco laughed and she looked slightly embarrassed. "Sorry, I- you're just sweet, that's all."
She leant over and gave him a soft kiss that he felt couldn't have lasted more than a moment.
"I'll see you for lunch, okay?" And with a gleeful smile she left the room.
He lay his head back and closed his eyes. He was smiling wider than he has in a long time. Could things finally be going his way? Did he, Draco Malfoy, finally get the girl? The perfect girl?
In his mind he traced the outline of her face, her rosy cheeks and full smiling lips. Her warm brown eyes just sparkled when she looked at him and he couldn't believe his luck. Things were finally going his way.
As Hermione crept through the common room and up to her dormitory she has a slight bounce in her step. He was turning out to be such a beautiful person, something she never would have expected. Her hand reached automatically for the pendant he gave her. Underneath his cold exterior and all the hatred he had projected was a kind and sweet man struggling to get through the world.
Maybe he could get along with Harry and Ron… Hermione scoffed to herself. He wasn't that different, neither were they for that matter. They were all so arrogant and proud when it came to something like that. Draco would never admit to them that he knew what he had done was wrong, and the other two would never let him forget it.
She sighed. This was how it had to be if she wanted to keep them all.
At least Luna wouldn't judge, but then again, she was the most understanding person that Hermione knew. When she headed up to her bed she collapsed in the cold sheets and almost wished that she hadn't left the room of requirement.
Draco headed back to the dungeons with his usual cocky smile on his face with his head held high. He gave the password to the painting and headed into the dimly lit common room. He slumped in the armchair he had claimed as his own and grinned.
"There you are, you're impossible to find lately." A chill washed over him and he sighed.
"Maybe that's a sign to stop looking." He grumbled.
"Ha-ha, stop whining." She lay back down on his lap and he turned away from her eager lips.
She grabbed his head forcefully, her nails digging into his neck. As she pulled him into her and slammed her lips against his he didn't twitch, he had no desire to involve himself with her anymore. He let her tear him down because that's what he thought he was worthy of. He had no self-worth before Hermione had made him feel something.
Pansy put him down and made him feel like nothing but he had thought that no one would ever make him feel important.
We accept the love we think we deserve.*
Pansy pulled back, annoyance plastered on her face. "Fine. Forget it. But you need to get with the program. You missed a lot over the break. I have to be the one to fill you in. You know we're counting on you not to screw it up this time."
"What are you talking about?" He shoved her gently and she stood up and walked around until she was staring down at him.
"The Revolution, I told you."
"No, you didn't."
"No? Well maybe I was going to on the train, but someone failed to show up." She spat. "It's not over. The Dark Lord may be dead but that doesn't mean that we need to obey these… Potter worshippers… we're coming back from this, and they're not going to see it coming."
Draco said nothing for a moment, the crushing feeling weighing down on his chest. He had hoped that this was over…
"Why are they planning something, who?"
"We aren't going to let them humiliate us and look down on us like we're weak! We're really going to show them. And it's those people who've been in hiding for months, supposedly dead. We don't need to play a part just yet, other things are being done for now. Do you want to know some plans?" She grinned wickedly and he grunted.
"Can you leave me in peace for a while? I need my sleep." He said curtly.
She narrowed her eyes but she walked away, he didn't care where she went. His whole body ached at the thought of what was to come.
Hermione had an early morning start, which she was early for as usual. She was smiling almost the whole way through the morning and she knew that Ginny was watching her like an owl but she didn't care. She was starting to be happy again, and a lot of that was because of Draco.
She didn't really know what to call him, they weren't technically together but she would like to think of it that way. She cared very deeply for him and she knew that he felt the same, even if he couldn't really say it. She hoped that he would be able to tell her how he feels at some point.
She headed down to the lake for lunch and began wandering around the banks. She loved this place, she couldn't imagine not being here after this year, Hogwarts felt like home. She loved the lake and the view of the countryside from the castle walls, she missed it all whenever she was back with her parents… her parents. She had only seen them for a short time after the Battle was over, she didn't know that she would see them again at the beginning of last year.
Many of the students felt the same way, though probably not under the same circumstances. In one way the battle did them all some good, it brought everyone closer. Well, it brought each side closer to itself and distanced one from the other even more vastly.
Despite that, Professor McGonagall had allowed room in the year for an extra break for students to spend with family. Just one week, almost two months after the Christmas break. She thought it was best for all students to not only know the values of their Hogwarts family but their biological families too.
A lot of the younger students just rolled their eyes, displeased at the idea of going home to their annoying siblings and fussy, overprotective parents. Hermione smiled to herself, knowing that one day they would really understand.
All students were required to leave unless there was a decent and proper excuse for them to remain at school. McGonagall didn't let the first and second years walk all over her, she was probably harder on them now than back when Hermione's group came through for the first time.
She couldn't wait to see her family, they would be back from their holiday and from the last letter she received they were just as excited to see her.
She felt a hand slip effortlessly into hers and it startled her for a moment, until she turned to see Draco giving her a small smile.
"Hi." He said.
"I didn't see you there." She reached up on her toes to kiss his cheek and she pretended that she didn't see him look around for wandering eyes.
"You seemed pretty lost in thought." He shrugged.
"Yeah, I guess I was."
They walked slowly around the lake, headed for the cover of the trees just before the forest. There was silence between them, which wasn't unusual, but Hermione couldn't help thinking about Draco's home and how things have been. She had only heard rumours about what had happened; all different and unfortunately none good.
"Draco…" She bit her lip a little as she spoke.
"Yeah?" He looked down suspiciously.
"I… uh… well I was just going to ask how you were doing."
"I'm fine."
"Well, yes, but I was just wondering how things were… at home?" She felt his fingers tighten and he began walking in an odd way.
"Fine." He said through gritted teeth.
"Draco…-"
"I said they were fine. What's it to you anyway?" She could hear the temper weaving its way into his voice and she pulled her hand out of his.
"I was just taking an interest in your life Draco. Am I not allowed to do that?"
"I didn't say that."
"Well what is it then? Why can't you talk to me?"
"I don't want to talk about it." He glared over at her and she sighed.
"What is this Draco? What are we? If we're anything at all I should be able to ask you something like that and not have you turn around and look at me like that." She knew that her expression was pained and he turned away from her for a moment. "If we avoid talking about everything you don't want to talk about we'll just be in silence for however long this lasts. If it even lasts at all."
"I want it to last. I- this is something. I just don't want to talk about that."
"Are you upset? Or ashamed? What is it? You know that I won't judge you Draco. I care about you."
"I care about you too." He mumbled.
"So please talk to me." He still wouldn't look back at her and she sighed. "Do you know what I did before this thing started?" His gaze twitched towards her a little. "I… I obliviated my parents." This time he looked up to see her on the brink of tears. "I didn't want them to be in danger in case… he needed leverage on me. So, I cast the spell and removed me from their minds. I convinced them to live in Australia so they would be far enough away from all of this that they might be safe. I didn't think I'd ever see them again, especially not with their full memories of me. After the battle, Aurors were sent to find them and bring them back. Most of their memories were recovered, but sometimes they forget little things. They can't remember my favourite things, and they forgot when my birthday was, but they remember me. I didn't think they ever would again." Even just thinking about the idea that she may never have seen them again made her get upset.
Even though things had been restored and she was a part of their lives again, there was a time when she didn't think there could have been.
Draco stared down into the thin layer of snow still covering the ground and sighed. "My father didn't go to Azkaban." She looked over curiously but he still wouldn't look up. "Everyone seems to think he did, I know that's what people are saying, but he didn't. They gave him some pardon thing, I don't know why. He's forbidden from entering the Ministry unaccompanied and he's practically a social pariah. He just sits at home, reading through his old library mainly. All that my mother does is take care of him. It's like walking into a ghost house. They only see each other now. Between my father's disgrace and my mother's blame, there's nothing there anymore."
Hermione could see the dark cloud that was surrounding him and how bleak it must have been to live in that house. No wonder he came back here.
"Is that why you came back?" She said softly.
"At least here people talk about the reasons why they avoid me. At least I know what they think I've done, who they think I am. At least here I know that I've given them a reason to think of me as a monster."
He was broken. He was so very broken inside and she didn't know how to fix him. She could see the overwhelming pain that he was feeling and she finally understood why he didn't want to tell her about any of this. He was trying to keep it hidden so that he didn't have to face the reality of what his life was. He didn't have to question the kind of man he was.
"You're not a monster Draco." She cupped his cheek in her hand and gently turned his head to look into his eyes, they were the eyes of a man in agony.
The stormy grey seemed to swirl around like a violent tempest that threatened to bring destruction at any moment. There was such hopelessness in them that she knew that they had been brought together for a reason. She couldn't find a purpose for herself and he was lost, a shadow of someone he thought he had been, wandering aimlessly.
"You're anything but." She leant up and kissed him, two tears falling in chorus down his pale cheeks.