They finally managed to practise their spells together, like they had originally planned, Hermione didn't want to push him too much. It took a while before the smile came back to his lips and the dark cloud around him seemed to fade away. Hermione knew that it was still there, but for now, he seemed happy.

She brought up the subject of a patronus in passing but he waved it away, claiming that he wouldn't be able to do it. He didn't want to face the disappointment of not being able to, not with her watching him. He knew she would feel sorry for him, but he didn't want her to.

"I'll send you a note, to let you know when we can meet up again. I have a lot of study I need to get done." She smiled and wrapped her arms around him.

He breathed in deeply, her rose and lavender scent filling his body with warmth. As her grip loosened around him he knew he had to let her go too. With one last warm smile she turned and headed back to the castle. He watched her for a while before he started another walk around the lake.

What was he going to do when he would be forced to go home? He had a reason, but would anyone listen? Or care?

He knew that he would end up back there anyway. Maybe he could occupy his time trying to find a single book in their enormous library that he could give to Hermione. That would definitely take him a while.

Even just thinking about her when she wasn't there made him ache, he missed her sweet touch. She was so perfect; something was bound to go wrong again. It always does, just when he thinks that he'll be happy.

He won't let himself lose her again though, he could hardly stand it the first time. Now that he has felt her touch and experienced the pain of losing her, he will never do it again. No matter what it takes. He just hoped that he wouldn't be too much of a coward if he ever does have to fight for her.

He sighed and continued walking around the lake.

Hermione rushed back to the common room and stood in front of the fire, warming her numbing fingers.

"Where have you been all day?" She turned around to see Ginny looking over at her with folded arms.

"Actually, I've been practicing my charms down by the lake." It was the truth, granted slightly warped.

She returned to warming her hands by the fire.

"Don't lie, why won't you just tell me who he is?"

"I'm not lying and why can't you respect my privacy?" Hermione turned around to warm her back and face Ginny.

"We're friends Hermione, don't you trust me?"

"Why are you pressuring me?"

"Secrets don't do any good Hermione! They just make people drift apart, and we don't need any reasons to drift apart. We can't hide things from one another, that's the last thing we need." Hermione could see that she was worried, she knew that we were leaving Hogwarts this year and that she would be one of the only ones in our little group that would still be here, Luna being one of the only exceptions, and she was in another house.

"Nothing is going to tear us apart, Ginny. I promise. And I will tell you, you just have to let me figure out what's going on first." Hermione said softly.

Ginny sighed and sat down on the sofa. "Sorry, I guess I'm just a bit strung out. It's Georges birthday soon."

Hermione felt someone tugging on her heartstrings and went to sit by Ginny. She put a hand over hers and Ginny sighed again.

"First one since… you know."

"I know."

"Nothing will ever be the same, will it?" She asked with a sense of longing.

"No, I don't think it will be the same ever again." Draco passed through her mind.

This was the first time she had felt like maybe this wasn't the right thing, she felt almost guilty.

Draco didn't see Hermione the next day; he didn't even get a note to say that she was busy. He knew that she didn't need to send him constant messages, but he just loved the feeling he got when he saw the little piece of parchment floating towards him.

She did say that she had a lot of study to get done. He resigned himself to the idea that she was just lost in study. Still, he found himself sitting around thinking of her and getting distracted. He should probably have been getting his study done but he just couldn't concentrate.

His mind was all over the place. He thought about Hermione, about what Pansy had said, he thought about what it would be like to go home, what he would do when his time at Hogwarts came to an end. It all seemed to be getting closer and closer.

He didn't sleep properly that night; he was far too wrapped up in all of his ponderings to sleep.

The next day as he sat at the breakfast banquet he looked over to where she always sat at the Gryffindor table. She seemed to be picking at her food, probably thinking just as much as Draco was.

Hermione couldn't get that feeling out of the pit of her stomach, that she was doing something wrong. She knew her friends could never understand her wanting to be with someone like Draco. Especially not with him being the person they thought he was. She knew that they wouldn't be as patient as she is, or even take the time out to listen, and if they did, they'd still never fully trust him.

What would they think of her if they knew? The reality of her situation was hitting her hard. Suddenly she didn't feel so sure. What she needed was to figure things out in her head.

Was she willing to risk her friends for what she thought she could have with Draco? For what she thought he could make her feel? As she ate her breakfast that morning she thought she saw him staring a few times.

Well he would have to wait until she knew where her loyalties lay. It was an easy decision in theory, but in practice trying to choose between your head and your heart was anything but simple.

She didn't talk to him for another three days after that. Every day Draco woke up with the false hope that she would send him a note, and every night he went to bed with a pressure on his chest that he knew all too well. He felt so stupid for even having the hope that she would want to see him. That wasn't like him.

Hope wasn't something that he had a lot of to spare.

He felt to anger rising inside him, but he wasn't angry at her. He was angry at himself. He must have done something, or said something, to make her turn away. Or maybe she saw him like the rest of them, a ghost, a shadow.

He ran his hands through his hair with frustration so many times that week. Sometimes he didn't think he could cope with the things that happen inside him. Sometimes everything becomes too much.

He rummaged through his trunk that lay under his bed that afternoon, looking for one of his textbooks when he saw the dried green leaves sitting at the bottom. He stopped his search and picked them up. His eyes glazed over as he rolled them between his fingers. He shook his head to get the memories out and put the leaves in his shoulder bag with the rest of the things for his study.

As he left his dormitory he shoved his hands in his pockets and hunched his shoulders. He was very much the brooding wizard. He walked all around the castle, on his way to the library. He thought he would walk past the fifth floor prefect's bathroom, where they had touched for the first time.

He missed her smile, her fingers brushing his skin. Maybe that place could bring some of that back to him.

He stood in the doorway just thinking about her. How had he not noticed her like this before?

Almost as if someone had planned it, he saw her long wavy hair bob past him and he reached out to grab her hand. She hadn't seen him standing there and spun around, bewildered at his sudden grasp on her wrist.

"Draco! What are you doing?" She asked as he pulled her into the bathroom.

He wasn't even sure, he just couldn't let her walk by him. They stopped in front of the bath and the taps began to fill the giant tub. They both gave it a curious look before turning back to one another.

"What are you doing?" She repeated.

"I… well, you never sent me a message." He stuttered a little.

She looked away and he felt slightly ill, had his doubts been true? "I know, I've… been really loaded with study and-"

"You're lying." He said, almost as a question.

"No I'm not!"

"Then why won't you look at me?" He said coldly.

She looked up, her eyes full of guilt. "Draco… I-"

"So you've been avoiding me?"

"I know I shouldn't have been…" She put her bag down by her feet and he did the same. The pain in his eyes made it so hard for her to look up. "I'm sorry."

He had a sudden memory flash and gave her a shove. As she stepped back to steady herself her foot slipped to the edge of the bath and she screamed as she reached out to grab him, but he was way ahead of her. He grabbed her arms and let himself fall into the bubbly water.

They splashed down and she let go of his arms. She gasped as she looked down at herself.

"What on earth was that for?" She glared up at him.

"Do you remember when you did it to me? I called you a… I called you a mudblood and went to apologise as you shoved me in." She looked at him like he was crazy but she started laughing and he wasn't sure what to make of it, she still looked furious.

"You are absolutely mental Draco."

"How else am I meant to get your attention?" She began laughing even harder and gave him a punch on the arm.

He splashed her with the water and she flicked it back. So they played in the water, Draco smiling, his heart warming at her joyous laughter.

She was so beautiful, and she was here with him.