A/N: Thanks to everyone who reviewed/alerted/fav'ed my story:-) They are appreciated
Sorry it took so long to update, school has been demanding last month. Also the dorms on campus aren't the best place to write as there is quite a lot of distraction and lack of peace and silence.
Huge thank you to my prereaders Dooba and Simaril, who took the time to read and beta this chapter.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. No copyright infringement is intended.
On with the story...
Their behavior made me uncomfortable. Rosalie keeping my daughter away from me, the others grouping together, the presence of the wolves in the forest, it made me antsy. It was so much, too much to process right now, because all I wanted was to simply meet my daughter for the first time. It shouldn't be this huge deal. I proceeded till I was at the bottom of the steps. When I took a few more steps in the lawn, I stopped. I was facing the lawn, the Cullens standing behind by me on the porch.
Jacob crossed his arms again, standing tall a few meters away, ready to physically stop me. All I saw was someone who wanted to provoke me. If I had to fight him, then so be it. Nothing would stop me. I prepared myself, my instincts taking over. I observed the whole situation to come up with the best way to get past Jacob towards Renesmee. It only took me a few moments to analyze the whole situation.
The wolves… They would stick together. I couldn't simply attack the one in front of me. It wouldn't be one against one, but one against three. One wolf I could handle, maybe… but three… It was unlikely. Even I realized that.
Besides the wolves, there were others. I shifted so they were sideways of me. I could now see the wolf and the female with child on one side, the group of vampires on the other side. I shifted so my front was faced towards the trees where the two remaining wolves hid. My back was safe. For now, nobody could sneak up on me undetected.
The vampires stood together. The ones who were grinning before didn't look so eager anymore. Their expression matching the others: concern and wariness. The honey-blond one eyed me, almost looking angry. My upper lip curled up slightly. The bronzed-haired one watched the honey-blond. He became more alarmed and snapped his eyes to me. I hissed at them.
Would they side with the wolves? If that was indeed the case, then I didn't stand a chance. I felt myself begin to tremble from anger and frustration. They would stand by the wolves because one of the vampires stood behind the wolves. She walked over there while she could have walked to the others. To me that confirmed my suspicion.
A small noise coming from the child, no not child, my daughter, fueled my determination to get to her. Just as I was crouching down, preparing to leap in her direction, I saw vampires rushing towards me. I growled. I felt something strange trying to wash over me. It felt like a wave of something foreign, something that wasn't my own. I remembered the sensation from before. It only caused me to become angrier. The honey-blond male was trying to manipulate me. Maybe he was doing it… trying to do it the whole time. Until now, I didn't notice it. I looked at him.
He was tense and stoic. The female holding my daughter was cooing to her. When she lifted her eyes, she eyed me warily, but there was also sympathy. Most of all, I wanted to take my daughter and run away. She was my priority.
Three vampires had left the group and stood closer to me. The honey-blond one and the blond one stood at the bottom of the steps, while the third one, the bronze-haired one approached me. He had a mixed expression on his face. He looked determined but also angry. Somehow, I got the feeling that the anger wasn't directed at me, though. This gave me a little bit of hope. Maybe the vampires wouldn't side with the wolves…
The stinking male – the one standing between me and my child – didn't know how to behave. He seemed fidgety. His arms went from crossed over his chest to in front of him in a 'don't come any closer' gesture. Good! It gave me the advantage to strike before he made up his mind. His eyes, however, held a determination. It made me apprehensive. Maybe he wasn't as undecided as he led on.
"Bella, please don't come any closer." It sounded like his last warning.
A growl ripped from my lips. I inhaled, gagging at the terrible smell. I clenched my teeth and glared at him.
"Jacob… Just stop it. This won't end well!" The male closest to me said through gritted teeth. So he was angry at the wolf.
"I'm sorry but I can't… Please try to understand," he pleaded with the male. I narrowed my eyes more. How dare he? Was he seeking allies? I tensed completely. I felt like a spring stretched to its maximum, ready to snap. The foreign waves still tried to invade my body. I was too riled up to feel it affect me. The male closest to me snarled at him.
"I didn't mean for it to happen. You know we don't control it. I didn't plan this. You got to believe me," the reason of my anger tried again. His plea caused another snarl.
His words didn't make any sense to me. But I wouldn't let his exclamation distract me. The only thing I did understand was that I still wasn't holding my daughter. He looked at me, a look that was pleading. I hissed. My patience had worn thin. I was ready to snap at any time. At my reaction, his demeanor changed. His look changed from pleading to one of warning. I shouldn't go near my daughter. I kept my eyes on him, solely on him. He was the only one of importance right now.
The only thing I saw right now was something preventing me from reuniting with my child. It wasn't a wise decision on his part. You don't separate a mother from her child. Never! I had enough. I crouched, baring my teeth. The male in front of me started shaking. Shivers ran over his body, getting faster and more extreme as time went on.
"Don't do it Bella. Don't make me," the male warned me. But it was too late already. I heard voices shout from behind and beside me. I paid very little attention to it. Before anyone could do anything, I lunged, slamming into the trembling male. The female behind him quickly got out of the way as he flew backwards from the collision. He landed near the trees.
Immediately the two other wolves jumped in front of him, snarling at me. I snarled right back. Every part of my body was tensed. I eyed them, looking for weak spots to target. The male stood back up and spoke to the wolves.
"Back down! Stay back." The animals turned their head towards him. The grayish wolf was anything but ready to back down. It bared its teeth again at me.
"Leah!" The grayish wolf – a female – lowered her ears, gave a low growl and stayed put. It didn't deter me though. I was still looking for a way to take them out. The male held his hands out.
"Bella, stop!"
I hissed at his command. He actually dared to tell me what to do. I narrowed my eyes, lowered my crouch and curled my fingers. I was rocking on the balls of my feet ready to lunge. Around us a chaos erupted. I heard vampires rushing over to us. The male's trembling got worse as he walked stealthily in my direction. I met him halfway before any of them could reach me, thrusting my hands out. He shoved back. Dirt swirled around as his feet bore in the soil.
He was able to stop his body from shoving and suddenly his trembling exploded. I heard clothes ripping. Right in front of me, where the male had been, stood a huge russet brown wolf. It was the size of a horse with impressive paws. I instinctively took a step back. Arms wrapped around my chest restraining and shielding me from the animal. The wolf stepped closer, joined by the two others. They were frightening. The grayish wolf snarled again, her teeth bared. The wolf in front gave her a small growl and she quieted down a little. I couldn't take my eyes of them. The wolf in front looked at me, taking me in. He was studying me. His big dark brown eyes were fixed on me. He intimidated me.
The other vampires had caught up with us. The bronze-haired one pulled me closer to his chest. My first reaction was to hiss at him. He looked down at me with black eyes and then turned his gaze to the wolves. He oozed anger. The blond one angled himself between the two camps. The honey-blond increased the foreign wave of calming feelings. It seemed to work somewhat on everyone
My mind settled down some. Everything became slightly clearer again.
"Enough, please. Let us settle this without a fight. No one has to get hurt. We can talk about it. Jacob, can you please phase back? We need to talk."
The huge wolf looked over at me, then back to Carlisle. He slowly nodded and walked into the forest. The other two wolves stood tensed.
I was still in Edward's arms when I remembered Renesmee. My gaze drifted to the porch behind me. The remaining Cullens stood together. They looked on edge by the whole spectacle. I spotted Rosalie standing in the doorway behind the others. Her arms were shielding Renesmee. How did she get there? She must have run there during the chaos. I got the urge to go towards her. Rosalie subtle shook her head, nodding towards the scene around me. I didn't understand why I couldn't just see Renesmee, just to make sure she was alright. Movement from my left got my attention again.
Jacob walked out of the trees, only wearing ripped shorts. I turned my head back to the scene. Edward draped his arm around my shoulder, pulling me closer to him. I inhaled his scent. It calmed me.
"Jacob, thank you for phasing back. I hope we can come to some understanding. This isn't going to solve itself. However, this is neither the time nor place," Carlisle spoke softly but with a hint of authority.
Jacob's gaze drifted to Renesmee and then to me. He answered Carlisle's question but kept his eyes on me. It seemed like he was addressing me too.
"I know this isn't going to magically disappear, But I can't just sit by and do nothing."
I didn't understand. Why was he being so difficult? Why was he even hanging around anyway? I was a vampire now. What could be so important for him to go against me? Why did the Cullens even allow him to linger around and standing between me and Renesmee? Carlisle brought me out of my musings when he spoke again.
"We will discuss this later. I want you to step back, Jacob."
Jacob looked tense. He gritted his teeth. The two other wolves stood by him, both looking at me. He watched me for a second. His silence annoyed me.
"Why are you still here, Jacob? Why are you preventing me from seeing Renesmee?"
It was a question but my tone was forceful.
"I don't trust you. I can't risk her getting harmed. I won't allow it to happen. If that means keeping her away from you… "
I narrowed my eyes at him, the previous calmness vaporized. I felt my muscles tense up at his statement.
"Get out. Now! Jacob, enough!" Edward snarled.
"How dare you! Do you really think I would harm her, my own daughter? That's just absurd," I exclaimed forcefully. The thought of harming my own daughter was sickening. The fact that he used that as an excuse to stand between us was… I couldn't even come up with a word to describe how that was. I felt anger bubbling up again.
He held up his hands. Before he could speak, Edward interrupted him. He kissed the top of my head.
"Jacob, I won't allow you to accuse her of that. I tolerated you being here, but you overstayed your welcome."
At the end of his reply, his tone was less neutral. It seemed like Jacob was pushing his limits. Jacob still held his hands up.
"Are you sure she won't harm Renesmee? Who says she won't do the same as when smelled the human? I won't take that risk-"
I gritted my teeth and Edward snarled.
"That is not for you to decide. We are all here to make sure everything goes as smoothly as possible, but you are not going to decide how and when it will happen," Carlisle responded.
Jacob exhaled, looked at Renesmee real quick, and then settled back on me. He had a defeated look. He seemed pained.
"Fine, but I want to stay close by."
"Fair enough. You can stay. But you won't interfere, and you will stay back. Same goes for Seth and Leah. They don't make a sound of protest. I mean it, Jacob, you are really pushing it. I can understand your reluctance, but you are making this more complicated than it already is."
Leah was anything but pleased. She let out an offended huff. Edward's gaze snapped to her. His stare becoming more hostile. He was reading her thoughts, and he didn't like them. It made me tense up again.
"If you don't like it, then leave! No one is ordering you to stay."
Leah growled at his stern voice. She looked at us, then to Jacob. He nodded slightly and then she backed up. She directed her gaze at me and let out a last warning growl, before disappearing through the trees. I eyed her till I couldn't see her anymore; but I could still hear her. She didn't go far. Carlisle's sigh brought me back to the situation at hand. He seemed tired.
"Jacob, can you please take a few steps back. For your own safety? We don't want Bella to feel threatened by your presence when she meets her daughter."
He looked warily. It wasn't easy for him it seems. His eyes shifted to me. He held my gaze for a moment. It unnerved me. I was getting impatient. I fidgeted. Finally, after what seemed like a long time, Jacob nodded. His eyes went to Renesmee one more time and then he backed up. His eyes never left us but he went to stand next to Seth.
This whole ordeal only kept me longer from meeting Renesmee. The whole thing only lasted a few minutes, but it seemed like a very long time. I ached to hold her. I wanted so badly to turn around and just go up the porch towards Rosalie, who was still holding her.
Carlisle and Edward seemed to exhale in relief. Edward let go of me and turned me around, facing him and the porch. Immediately I was overcome with different feelings. Excitement, nervousness and worry battled for dominance.
I pulled back, anxious as to why he behaved the way he did. He held me at arm's length. I searched his eyes for anything that showed me what he was feeling. Movement from the other side of us caught my attention, and I turned my head. The rest of the family had moved into different positions. Rosalie was still in the doorway between the porch and the house. Alice was standing next to her. Esme and Emmett stood protectively in front of them. Their eyes fixed on me. The anxiousness grew.
Carlisle passed us and stood by Jasper. They stood between us and the steps to the porch. Edward's fingers urged me to look at him. His eyes held different emotions. I could see love, admiration and concern. It was the concern that put me on edge. Before it could escalate, he spoke.
"Don't worry, love. We won't prevent you from seeing her, but we have to be cautious. She is half human. We just have to be careful."
I could understand his reasoning somewhat, but still… I wouldn't dream of hurting her. The thought alone made me sick. He saw my contempt and proceeded before I could object.
"She is half human, half vampire, she has traits of both. She is warm and has a heartbeat."
At his words, the burning sensation in my throat became apparent. The idea of human blood enticed me. But the idea that it was Renesmee, quenched that. She overrode my need for blood..
"Maybe she should hunt again first," Jasper stated, watching me intently. I hissed at him. It took everything to stay put and answer calmly.
"I just hunted. First the wolves and now you? Are you going to keep me away from her? I wouldn't dream of harming her!"
I held his gaze, in the meanwhile keeping track on everybody else. He narrowed his eyes slightly.
"I am not keeping you from your daughter. I am making sure that you are well fed before you attack her in your frenzy."
I snarled at his cold voice. His words riled me up. He won't stand in my way. I didn't feel the slightest urge to attack Renesmee. Edward leaned his head closer to me and whispered in a soothing voice.
"I know you want to see her. But it will be safer if you are fed. Doesn't your throat bother you? Just one hunt, we'll make it quick."
I looked into his eyes.
"I feel my throat burning, but it's not because of her. When I think of her, I don't get the urge to hunt. I just want to meet her, please!" I pleaded. He looked imploringly into my eyes. Then he nodded.
We both looked up towards the porch. My eyes searching for Rosalie first. She was speaking to my daughter. Renesmee held her small hand to Rosalie's cheek. She was absolutely silent, yet Rosalie answered her.
"That's her, yes. That's mommy."
Renesmee lowered her hand and turned her face to me again. I was mesmerized. Without conscious thought I stepped closer towards the porch till I was only a meter away from the steps leading up the porch. The Cullens stood ready. Very subtle I felt the atmosphere tense. The air was filled with anticipation and wariness. The shift in emotional climate made me uneasy. I was suddenly anxious but excited too. I crossed the distance between me and the steps to the porch and stood still, holding Renesmee's gaze.
She was so beautiful. She had a mope of brownish hair with a bronze gleam in it. It was amazing. The bronze gleam was equally spread in her hair. On some parts it was more pronounced, but that was probably because of how the light hit it. It looked so soft and curly. Her eyes had an oval shape with long fine eyelashes decorating them. She blinked her eyes and her eyelashes touched her cute cheeks. Her gaze held different emotions; she looked happy and excited, but also curious. I let my gaze drift across the rest of her face. Her nose was small but cute, like a little button. Her lips were slightly pulled up in an uncertain smile. Everything looked well proportioned.
She looked simply perfect. A slight blush tinted her cheeks. Her skin looked smooth and creamy. It wasn't as pale as the vampires' but also not as tan as Jacob's skin. From where I stood, she looked like a human.
Edward squeezed my hand. I kept looking at our daughter.
"She is so beautiful. She looks perfect. Can I hold her?" When I asked that I looked at him.
"She's perfect, our little Renesmee."
The adoration in his voice was obvious. It warmed my unbeating heart. I made the motion to assent the steps. Immediately some of the Cullens stood straighter. Jasper and Carlisle started to come closer. They blocked my view as they stood at the top of the steps. I hissed at them. My feelings of love and adoration for my daughter melted away.
"Bella, we don't want to keep you away from her. We just have to be sure. Can you listen long enough to do what we say? Just precautions…"
Carlisle looked imploringly in my eyes. My mind was battling with itself. I just wanted to see my daughter. I gazed behind Carlisle to Rosalie and Emmett. She nodded at me. I directed my eyes at Edward, pleading for his guidance. He squeezed my hand and kissed the top of my head. His loving gestures worked calming and I nodded to Carlisle to acknowledge his words. I was itching to meet and hold Renesmee. I hoped his precautions weren't too demanding.
"Very good. Okay. Can you take slow easy breaths? To get acquaintance with her scent."
I felt Edward place his hand on my shoulder. He didn't put pressure on them, but it kept me centered for now. I took a shallow breath. The different scents of everyone in my surroundings registered: the disgusting, nose-burning smells of the wolves, the many smells of the Cullens, the many scents of the forest-life. Mingled with all those things was another unique scent. I inhaled again, focusing more on the unique scent.
It was sweet and fresh, very appealing between everything else. It had to belong to Renesmee. I gazed at her, meeting her big brown eyes. I raised my chin higher in the air and took in another breath. I froze. Immediately there was movement. Edward put some pressure on my shoulders to keep me in place. In front of me I saw Jasper and Carlisle change posture. I curled my upper-lip slightly. I wasn't going to attack my own child! With my last intake of breath I smelled something else about the unique scent that belonged to Renesmee. Her scent was mingled with something different, something that made her less appealing in the 'food'-category. It was a beautiful scent. I know beautiful can't be linked to a scent, but I couldn't find another words to match. It was part of what made her unique. The beautiful, almost sickly sweet, but at the same time subtle scent combined with the sweet and fresh part, made her the most beautiful scent I had smelled this far.
"Her scent is so beautiful and rich… but also… subtle and sober… One part of her scent is very appealing, but the other part holds it in balance. The two parts combined…" I tried to put my thoughts into words. I felt the pressure on my shoulders lighten up.
"You probably smell her human nature and her vampire side as well. The vampire part is what keeps it in balance. How does that smell make you feel, love?"
"I… I love her already. I couldn't even dream of thirsting for her." I yearned to hold her.
Edward pressed another kiss on the top of my head. Carlisle's face lit up, a small smile forming on his lips.
"That's good, Bella. This will make it easier and safer. Can you come up to the top step?"
He took a step back, stepping completely from before my daughter. Jasper stayed where he was, keeping an eye on me. Hesitantly I took the first step up with Edward right behind me, his hands never leaving my shoulders. I continued to take shallow breaths to acquaintance myself more with Renesmee's scent. With Jasper standing right at the top step I stopped a step lower, very cautious of him. I didn't trust him. His eyes weren't black, but they held sternness and warning.
"Take a step back, Jasper," Edward said tersely.
Jasper's lips thinned to a straight line as he stepped slightly to the side. I remained still. Edward nudged me to take the final step to the porch. Once I stood fully on the porch, I looked expectantly at Carlisle. Alice and Esme formed some sort of line on both sides of Rosalie and Emmett. It felt like I had to walk to an altar. Carlisle nodded in their direction and I slowly took a step, eying everyone around me. They held their position, so I took another step.
A soft warning growl from behind me snapped my attention to the wolves standing at the edge of the lawn and the trees. I hissed in frustration and anger, especially as I saw that Leah – in wolf form – had joined the two men. Edward cursed. Surprisingly it was Jasper who answered them.
"Enough already. I can't deal with you mutts a top of handling everything here. Either stay there and be quiet or leave!"
A soft growl and a huff came from the trio standing there. Jacob raised his hands as if to surrender. I scoffed; again he was hindering my reunion with Renesmee! Edward spoke softly in my ear.
"Calm down, love. Don't let them take this from you. Look, our daughter is right before you. Don't let Jacob spoil your moment."
I concentrated back on the scene before me. I was almost next to Esme and Alice. I eyed them warily. Would they step in front of me? Their eyes held concern and anticipation. They smiled tentatively. I gave them a hesitant smile in return. Renesmee's squirming drew my attention to the couple standing in front of me. From the corner of my eyes I saw that every Cullen had concentrated around me, like they were preparing for something. It made me a little wary. I kept an eye on them while looking up to Emmett. He stood protectively next to his wife. His arms were next to his body, seemingly nonchalant but the small tremors told me was tensing his muscles.
He looked at me intently. I held his gaze, not wanting to miss his next move. The others in my periphery sight stood around us. After what seemed like a very long time, Emmett nodded once and brought his arm to Rosalie's' shoulder, leaning slightly towards her and Renesmee. Rosalie smiled when she looked at me. I saw Renesmee put her hand against her cheek again. Rosalie looked down at her with a loving smile.
"Mommy's here. You want to meet her?"
Renesmee nodded and turned back towards me, smiling. My heart warmed and an all-consuming love enveloped my very being. She reached her arms out for me to grab her. A soft growl momentarily distracted me. My head snapped towards the sound. Those stupid… aargh! I felt anger bubble up inside of me. I've just had about enough of them!
"Bella. Bella, calm down. Think of Renesmee. Calm down, you don't want to hurt her. Control your movements, please," Rosalie soothed me.
I looked back at her and saw her eyes narrow and her lips formed a thin line. She kept looking at me but her voice was icy when she addressed the three wolves.
"You listen to me, mutts, you had your fair share of warnings. Back off! We won't tell you again. Got it?!"
Her threat was answered by provoking snarls. She turned her head to them and showed her teeth, letting a hiss escape from between them. I felt the foreign waves wash over me and shot a look at Jasper. I saw he was doing his best to calm everyone down. It seemed to work as the wolves relaxed a little and everyone on the porch eased some of their strained posture. I felt the effects less but something else drew my attention away from the tension: a soft warm touch.
I looked at Renesmee and saw her fingers touch my fist. I didn't realize I had made fists. My hand relaxed. I turned my hand over so my palm was touching her fingers. Slowly I moved my fingers and stroked her little fingers. The feeling was so surreal. Her touch was soft and warm, her skin was smooth. Tentatively my other hand came up to touch her other hand. I stared into her eyes. She became to most important thing that registered right now. Everything around me became muted and blurred. I got lost in her touch.
"Would you like to hold her?" Rosalie asked warmly. I met her gaze. Her gaze held only positive emotions. I was a little scared, what if I hurt her without realizing? I could even hurt Edward. At my hesitation some Cullens stepped closer to me. Edward placed his hand on my shoulder.
"You okay, love? Is it overwhelming? We can try again later-"
"NO! I mean, no, I can handle it. I don't feel the need to attack her or anything. I'm just scared…"
I kept my eyes on our daughter but took in everything around me as well. It was dangerous to neglect my surroundings. It was stupid of me to get lost in her touch when so many things could harm me or her. Carlisle spook up.
"What are you scared of? You're doing wonderful."
"What if I hurt her unintentionally? I hurt Edward before. I don't want to harm her."
"Try to remember at all times that you are holding something breakable. Concentrate on what you are doing. Feel with you skin when you touch her. Your skills are heightened now. If you hurt her or cause her discomfort, you will feel it."
Carlisle's words put me more at ease. Maybe I could do this. I wanted so badly to hold my daughter. Edward squeezed my shoulder reassuringly. I observed where everyone was standing; Jasper had come a little closer. He still stood to the side slightly, but in direct line to me. He either moved himself in that position or the others moved away from between us. I realized he stood strategically: far enough to not set me off completely, but in the best place to get to me immediately when needed.
Renesmee moved her fingers and grabbed my hand in hers. I gently placed my free hand on her tiny waist under her arm. She understood what I wanted to do and released my hand. I put that hand on the other side of her waist. My eyes met Rosalie's and she nodded.
I concentrated to monitor my strength when I lifted Renesmee from her arms. She weighted nothing, it was like a feather, she was so light. I brought her to my chest, cradling her. She looked up to me and I met her gaze, all the while making sure I didn't squeeze her. She was even more beautiful from up close.
For a moment we were completely silent, just taking each other in. Then she brought her hand to my cheek. I gasped at the warm touch on my face. Before I knew what was happening, images appeared in my head. I froze and gasped again. I heard people around me move closer at once. They hovered next to me.
What was happening? I wanted to pull away, but at the same time I was fascinated by what I saw. I saw myself, but I looked different; sweaty and sick. My face was horrible with sunken eyes, sweat and blood. Next I saw images of the other Cullens, Jacob, rooms in the house. Finally I saw me again; but different. I was pale and beautiful; me as a vampire. The last image was of me approaching Renesmee on the porch moments ago. Was I seeing what she saw? How? Why?
After that image Renesmee pulled her hand away and rested it on my upper arm. I gasped again. My eyes widened. What was that? It was then I noticed multiple hands on my shoulders, arms and waist. It was unnerving. I tensed.
"Bella, please remember your holding Renesmee," Esme broke the momentary silence. Immediately I relaxed a little. I still felt quite shaken by what just happened. Rosalie gently pried Renesmee from my arms. I hissed at her.
"I'm not taking her away from you. I'm just going to hold her. I'll stay right next to you. This must be overwhelming for you."
At Edwards' gentle squeeze on my waist I handed Renesmee over, eying Rosalie with distrust. All hands left my body, except Edward comforting touch.
When I was sure she stayed put I looked up to the others, hoping for some explanation. I kept Rosalie in my sight thou.
"What… What was that? What happened to me?"
It was Edward who answered me in a soothing voice.
"That was all Renesmee. It appears she has a special gift."
I tried processing that information, replaying the images again.
"She showed me what she saw and experienced?"
Edward nodded. I was awed and curious. I felt like I didn't know my own daughter at all. It was unsettling. I inhaled deeply to settle my nerves. Her unique scent calmed me. I held it in before exhaling deeply. I watched everyone quickly. They were all relatively relaxed, although I knew they were alert and ready to intervene. Rustling behind me reminded me of the wolves. They were still present. I hated it. Edward must have sensed what I was feeling somehow; or Jasper felt it and Edward read it in his mind. He whispered in my ear.
"Ignore them. This isn't about them. Do you want to hold our daughter again?"
I nodded and Rosalie put her in my waiting arms. I cradled her against my chest again. The heat of her little body was seeping through my clothes. It felt nice. The first shock was over, now I could appraise her more. I took her in, completely.
I saw and felt her little fingers grasping my arms. Her fingers were slender, not puffy like you would see with a newborn baby. She wasn't chubby anywhere. Instead she was slender and beautifully proportioned. It seemed so strange that she was a newborn; she didn't look like one. It was abnormal and I tried to understand. How was this possible? I caressed her soft cheek.
"You are absolutely perfect, little Renesmee," I cooed at her.
She smiled. One of my hands held her to me while I traced her features very carefully with my other hand. My fingers trailed over her eyebrows, her nose, her jawline, her throat, her sternum and settled over her beating heart. The hummingbird-like thumping of her heart soothed me. I drank her in, imprinting her in my memories.
"I love you so much. You are special, you know. What did you just show me?"
She didn't answer but touched my cheek again. A small voice resounded in my head.
I love you too, mommy.
Startled I realized it was Renesmee's beautiful voice. Her voice was beautiful, it was difficult to describe how it sounded, but it was a mix between a singsong voice and a normal spoken voice. It seemed like that was also a mix between a human and a vampire trait.
"Won't you speak out loud?"
Right when I asked that, some things clicked together. All the things were there from the start and I had noticed them but somehow I didn't process what it all meant: she was supposed to be a newborn baby! Yet she didn't look like one, she could understand spoken words, could even speak. How is that possible? It scared me. I looked at Edward in fright. He looked worried. The atmosphere became less relaxed. Renesmee must have picked up my distress as her voice sounded back in my head.
Did I do something wrong, mommy?
I met her scared eyes. I relaxed my features immediately and smiled.
"No sweetie, It's okay. You didn't do anything wrong. It's okay."
My mind was going a mile a minute. So many things were off about this, with Renesmee. I met Edward's eyes.
"How old is she? She looks so big for a newborn baby."
"She's three days old. She grows faster than normal baby's do. I think her vampire traits are responsible for that. We are looking into it," Carlisle answered my questions quietly
"Is it dangerous, what will happen? How is that even possible?"
"Why don't we put our daughter to bed first. Then we'll talk," Edward suggested. I nodded.
I heard a commotion behind me. I turned around, shielding Renesmee with my arms. She pressed herself against my chest. Jacob made a move to come closer. I took a step back. Some Cullens stepped in front of me.
"She's tired, let me take her, she needs sleep," Jacob stated.
A growl rumbled from within me. Renesmee's clenched hand on my arm, quieted me down. I wouldn't scare her. Edward held us protectively while addressing him with a cold voice.
"No! She stays here. Renesmee will sleep in the house in our room."
Edward led me back towards the house. He kept his eyes on the wolves.
"Don't worry, he won't come any closer," Emmett said menacing.
I casted a glance over my shoulder and saw the Cullens group together in front of the doorway. Jacob wouldn't get in the house.
Edward led me up the stairs. Renesmee was yawning more frequently now. We took the stairs to the third floor and our bedroom. Edward opened the door for us and sped by us to pull down the covers. I laid our daughter down and pulled up the blanket, tucking her in, with some help from Edward. He pulled, I just held the fabric. I didn't want to damage anything. Renesmee yawned again.
Me and Edward both got on the bed on both sides of her. She was turned on her side facing me. She held my gaze as I softly caressed her cheek. Her beautiful brown eyes blinked. Each blink took longer. She slowly brought her hand to my hand.
I love you mommy
Her tired voice warmed my heart when I saw her eyes close for the night.
"I love you too, sweetie. Good night," I whispered softly.
I looked over her to Edward. His eyes held so many positive and warm emotions.
Let me know what you think? It is actually quite a challenge to find the balance between rational Bella and "newborn' Bella