Perverts in a Pocket

Title: Perverts in a Pocket

Pairing: MasaYuki, IeYuki, MitsuYuki (All for UKE!Yuki)

Genre: Yaoi, Comedy, Friendship

Summary: A/U. Yukimura is a poor lonely boy. He decided to do a simple suicide but got a couple friends instead. But did he really need friends who kept looking for a chance to slip their hands into his pants?

A/N: I'm very, very, very sorry for the long wait! I have the second chapter ready for so long and I was about to publish it when I think maybe the plot would be more interesting if I change it. It was happening in the last minute and here I am, using such a long long time to finish it. But yeah, here is the second chapter. Like before, please forgive me for any grammar mistake. Now please relax and enjoy the story. :)

Plan 2: Not Every Prince Wears White, Some Wears Yellow

"Hey! Rise and shine everyone! It's morning already!" a loud voice bombed the whole building from the ground to the roof. Like always, it was the same person everyday. "It's time for us young people to show the world the meaning of youth's spirit and romance in the-…!"

"Shut up, Monkey!" Date Masamune screamed furiously, kicking his door open and stabbing Maeda Keiji with his death glare. "Again and again, you waltz around with that stupid monkey of yours and ruin my morning-…! Don't you see I'm not a morning person!" he barked out loud, ignoring the fact that he too disturbed the other resident.

Keiji clamped his mouth shut with a smile and tiptoed toward the currently fuming Masamune, acting like a friendly man he was. "C'mon, we're still young! We have a lot of things to do, better than sleeping of course!"

Listening to what Keiji just said, Masamune kicked the guy in the ass and chased him away harshly. "Why do you think I moved out from my house and choose to live in this dorm, you dumbass!" That was clear already. He wanted a freedom that was why. Masamune wasn't exactly a free man but being ordered around wasn't exactly his hobby. Keiji scrambled to get back to his feet and was about to say another word when suddenly a pissed looking resident came out behind Masamune.

"You piece of a shit…!" he growled, drawing his katana out of its shelter. "Screaming every morning and makes my head pounding-…!"

"Mitsunari, that's enough," the spikey haired guy walked out of the room and tapped Mitsunari's shoulder to calm his friend down. Having Masamune's rampage every morning was more than enough. But seriously, this Keiji guy really needed something else to do if he wanted to have a long life. Both Masamune and Mitsunari wasn't a morning person, waking up too early might mess their mood for the whole day. "C'mon Keiji, you don't have to do this everyday…" he sighed.

Despite himself being lectured seriously, Keiji's grin went wider that before. His monkey, Yumekichi, squealed to lighten the mood. Man, that monkey had the same personality with his master. "Don't be so cold! I know the three of you doesn't even bother to put an alarm in that room of yours, and you guys sleep like logs. You'll be late if I didn't wake you up-…"

"Wake me up? How kind of you! But here… let me tell you something," Masamune smiled kindly but somehow his aura said otherwise. He dashed back into his room and came out with six swords in hand. "IT'S HOLIDAY TODAY, SMARTASS!" Keiji gulped and waved them goodbye so fast neither Mitsunari nor Ieyasu had a chance to grab him. "Uh-uh! No way I let you get away with this! Get back here, you Monkey!" and then, the dragon flew away to hunt the monkey down with his claws.

Yeah, such a thing happened almost everyday… If not everyday, of course.

Ieyasu groaned, scratched the back of his head lazily and rubbed his weary eyes. He just couldn't really get used with this kind of dorm life. Well, neither of the three of them could. Mitsunari always banged his head to the floor when Keiji waked them up with his ridiculously loud voice. And after that, the rare smile of Ishida clan would disappear for the rest of the day. Once his mood ruined, Mitsunari became the hardest person to befriend with. As for Ieyasu… Well, he could take care of himself with his temper and patience, but Masamune and Mitsunari's behavior after Keiji's surprise attack made him grew tired over time.

Maybe it was the right time to change room; the decision to put them into the same room wasn't exactly the brightest thing the dorm leader ever made. But yeah, nobody was actually brave enough to stand against the two princes of Basara High. There was three princes actually, but one of them was friendly enough to blend with the other student and dorm resident. Yup, we were talking about Ieyasu.

"Mitsunari, put your katana down," the yellow jacketed man spoke, pushing Mitsunari's hand down slowly.

"Don't you touch me," Mitsunari growled fiercely and Ieyasu quickly pulled his hand back. No matter how close the three of them were, facing each other with such a flaming emotion might not be a good idea. The white haired man sheathed his sword and walked toward their room.

"That's cold…" Ieyasu sighed. "Well, I better get Masamune before-…"

"HELL DRAGON!" that was Masamune for sure. With Keiji. Outside.

"Oh my…" Tokugawa Ieyasu, living his live in the dorm with two of his friends, would surely get a headache this morning. And that was sucks.

*_SnBs_*

And now, back to square one.

Morning was so beautiful with all those bright sunshine and cheerful little birds. There was so much to taste when the sun challenged the sky to give it a stage. Everywhere eyes landed, new discoveries tugged each person's interest to observe. This was usually the moment where them who had a breath to draw realized how lucky they were to be alive. But as usual, not everyone got a same thing to be grateful about. We could take Sanada Yukimura again as an example.

Just as what we've been told on the first chapter, Yukimura got a lot of debts to clean and suddenly got fired for an obvious reason. But the cruel fate of fortune that was bestowed upon him didn't let him escape from reality so easily. It kept him chained and hid the lock so well he couldn't set himself free from the invisible torture. Suicide should have been easy as long as he had a will. Never had he imagine that stopping his heartbeat forever and ever would be so hard; after all his effort to keep on living.

And now that the morning had come, Sanada Yukimura once again had to overcome his overwhelming urge to cry and got ready to go to hell. Yeah, the world without its charm and happiness was exactly the same as hell, even worse. But soon, this all would end in a glorious way ever possible. Yukimura had prepared everything, starting from the tools (the cheap and obtainable one of course) until the very last sheet of his last will. It wasn't like there was anyone who would be crying over his death-… Well, maybe Sasuke would. No, he would cry for sure. Maybe the news of his death would be broadcasted in TV and Sasuke would watch it by accident. Yeah, and then he would come and get his corpse and bury it somewhere close to him and-…

Okay, that was kind of creepy.

But it was a little to late to go back now! He had everything he needed so retreating would be very humiliating. The Amazing Takeda Shingen had taught him not to stop halfway before everything is settled. And so he would not do so!

"Oyakata-sama, this Sanada Yukimura shall accomplish what he should do until the very end!" he said with determination in his pure brown eyes and a long rope gripped in his hands. If you were wondered, it was the rope he used to hang his wet clothes at apartment. What would he do with it? You could imagine it by yourself, what else would it be?

Now, what he must do was looking for a good, sturdy and tall tree with lots of big branches. He just had to climb and tie the rope, and then hung himself until the very last breath of life left him. It did sound kind of painful but it was the cheapest way to die. He preferred doing it at home, actually, but the low and fragile ceiling prevented him from doing so. Committing suicide in the middle of a park, moreover in a broad daylight, was exactly same as… Well, suicide. Anyway, it would be completely awkward to have people find him when he was about to be a piece of dead meat. If he was dead afterwards, it wouldn't be a problem. But if he was alive, it was the opposite.

Anyway, no more complaining. He threw away his hesitation the moment he stepped his feet at this park, or at least he was supposed to. A tree, where would he find a tree? Basically it was everywhere; he was in a middle of a park. But the one he had to find was the one people would not get close to. It would increase the possibility of him completing his mission with a success. He couldn't afford to fail here.

"Tree…? Kibo-dono, where are you~…?" Yukimura murmured all by himself, walking pass through the crowd of people around the park. "Tree, tree, tree… Hm, maybe I can find a good one behind that bushes," the brown haired man nodded slightly and made his way into the shadowy path full of leaves and grass. "Hm… This one looks good, I think."

A tree, sturdy looking, big branches all over the trunk… It was enough for Yukimura to make sure this one was the one he was looking for. With this, the young man gulped and gathered his courage. With one last look over his back, making sure nobody was there to watch him; he proceeded with his plan to die. This would be the last thing he did in this world so please God, let it be the one he did successfully. And now the best thing to do to start everything, and end it of course, was to climb and tie the rope.

"Okay… Tie the rope… Sounds easy enough," he drew his breath and held it in for a moment. "I mean, how hard could it be?"

*_SnBs_*

While Yukimura occupied himself with the task in hand, another group of the radical parade arrived at the park to shake the whole place with their charm… Okay, not really. Real princes were supposed to spend their time smiling and giving people a chance to see how charming they were, but not this time. They were too busy with their own business to care about other people. Date Masamune, the first participant, scratched the back of his head and yawned without giving a damn to his surrounding. Such manner, he was supposed to cover his mouth when he was yawning but yeah, he didn't care. His mood was ruined, thanks to the help of Maeda Keiji for waking him up this morning.

The second one, Ishida Mitsunari, looked as if he was about to bit someone to death. His eyes were screaming for blood every time Ieyasu glanced over to make sure he was conscious enough to walk straight. This person had a worse personality than Masamune when it came to controlling his emotion. Masamune might seem like a cool but hot-tempered young man, but Mitsunari really took the cake. He wouldn't care to listen to anyone when he was angry and almost nothing could calm the ranging fire inside him. The only one able to do so was Toyotomi Hideyoshi. Okay, he was only a character inside the movie and samurai history, but Mitsunari was obsessed with him like crazy and often forgot about everything once he started talking about this monkey-look-alike guy.

Oh, never called him like that in front of Mitsunari or he might slice you into two with his katana.

Last but not least, Tokugawa Ieyasu. In the first sight, he might be the only one people would dare to get close this very moment. But even he had his own thing to mind now, for example both of his friends and his own safety. He walked with the middle, separating Masamune and Mitsunari to prevent any ridiculous fight from happening. And to increase the discomfort, the atmosphere around them grew heavier every passing minute.

"Hey, Mitsunari…" Ieyasu began, trying to lighten up the mood.

"Don't talk to me," was the only reply Mitsunary gave him. That was cold. Ieyasu glanced over to Masamune's side and put a smile on his face. Maybe this one would be easier to handle since he and Masamune had a friendlier relationship than he was with Mitsunari.

"No," Masamune grumbled and Ieyasu drew his head back in confusion. He was just about to say another word when Masamune cut him clean and simple. "You want to talk and I don't want to. End of story."

Ieyasu sighed, scratching the back of his head even though it wasn't all that icky. He washed his hair everyday so of course it was clean from any kind of uncountable creature. "C'mon, guys. We're in the park already so cheer up a little. People are scared because of you both keep putting your grumpy face," sadly it took more than that to get any attention from either Masamune or Mitsunari. "Guys… I know it's annoying; the way Keiji woke us up. But you can't be like this for the whole day! This's holiday! We're supposed to have fun!"

"I'm outta here," Masamune waved his friend good bye and walked away swiftly. Ieyasu's eyes were widened in shock. He quickly grabbed Masamune's hand and pulled him back into conversation. "God, the hell is wrong with you!"

"Masamune-…"

"I know, I know! We're going to have fun! But your way of having fun is different with mine!" he growled and yanked his hand away from Ieyasu's grip. "I'm gonna head to the arcade, look for me there if you want. Just don't get in my way," he finished his last word with a huff and left both of his friends in the crowded park. And now the only participants remained were

Tokugawa Ieyasu and the grumpy Ishida Mitsunari. What a bad combination for a start.

As if Masamune leaving wasn't enough, Mitsunari refused to have any contact and walked further from Ieyasu. The black haired man turned around from Masamune's way to Mitsunari's back, trying to decide which one he should follow. One wrong move and this holiday would end up like the rest. "Mitsunari, where're you going?"

Mitsunari didn't even care to stop to explain. "Somewhere. Don't follow me," he said and disappeared in the middle of human sea. There, only Ieyasu stood alone in the middle of he world without any destination to go to. God, he should have planning something before going out; this kind of thing was always happening. Remind him why he even got an idea to have a smooth vacation with Masamune and Mitsunari. It was impossible to begin with.

"Man, I should've accept Keiji's invitation to go with Motochika… At least they're easier to understand, maybe," Ieyasu took out his mobile from his pocket and flipped it open, dancing his fingers around the buttons to look for the right number. "I'm sure I keep his number somewhere-… Ah! Got it-…!"

"AH, LOOK OUT!" someone screamed out loud and Ieyasu's attention were diverted for a moment.

When the tall boxer turned his head to look for the source of that voice, all he felt was a painful strike on his head and he lost his balance for a moment. Ieyasu fell to the ground butt first and winched at the throbbing pain. This one would leave a mark for sure; both on his head and his butt.

Next to him was a soccer ball rolling without a player dribbling it. The one attacked him was this thing, Ieyasu was more than sure for in this theory. He rubbed his head carefully and slowly pushed himself back to his feet. The moment he was standing rather wobbly, a group of kid was running toward him with their face painted in fear. That served them right. But being a kind-hearted person he was, Ieyasu wasn't the type to hold grudge. He wasn't Mitsunari; that guy would chop those kids to pieces.

Ieyasu sighed and knelt down, picking the ball with his hands and offered it to the kids. "Here," he said with a smile.

"T-thank you, Sir…" one of the kids stuttered. "And… Sorry about your head."

"Well, that's one painful strike, if you ask me. I think I might get an amnesia-…" he replied and the kids gasped. Ieyasu loved this kind of reaction from kids; they were so innocent even the slightest joke could shock them. "I'm kidding! Relax; I'm not going to eat you guys. Just make sure you play it carefully next time, the other might no be as understanding as me."

"Okay!"

The spikey haired lad smiled and groped his pocket only to find it empty. "Huh? My phone-…?" his eyes widened for a moment. "Where's-…?"

The boy next to him, the one holding the ball, tugged his pants and pointed toward the bushes. "You throw it that way," he said, looking at him apologetically. Ieyasu nodded in realization, tapping his palm with his fist. It must have been launched when that round thing knocked him.

"Thanks for the information! Well, see ya!"

With that information at hand, Ieyasu dashed toward the nearest bushes and left the kids in their own world. Must be nice, having someone to play around with. Neither Mitsunari nor Masamune was that simple; they had a different hobby and activity all the time. Even he himself could barely find a time to spare to actually have a decent conversation with both of them. They actually could spend their time to get closer in this kind of day; holiday and all; but it always ended up as it was today.

No matter. There was always next time; maybe he would be luckier with his tongue to persuade them later. But now what he had to do was find his phone and ringed Keiji's number. If the lady of fortune hadn't actually deserted him, he could still catch up with Keiji and Motochika. So now back to the main problem. It wasn't like he had a bad sight; it was just that the leaves and grass didn't actually help him in his hunt. Moreover his phone's color. He should have picked another color, other than yellow. But he liked yellow.

"Ugh, where is it…?" suddenly, a buzzing sound caught Ieyasu's ear. That was his ringtone! Someone must have called him. Now all he had to do was to follow that sound and maybe find a glimpse of-… "There you are!" he declared cheerfully after seeing a blinking light under the tree. He immediately went closer, carefully not to get himself tripped, and lowered his body to pick his phone up. But before he made a contact with it, a cracking sound of a wood stole his attention. "What the-…?" he unlocked his gaze from his belonging and tilted his head up to see the spectacular show above him.

"Um… What are you doing?"

*_SnBs_*

No, Sanada Yukimura didn't have a problem with height. He was feeling just find to walk around the tall building and working at high places. Nope, he had no problem. It was actually nice to have the wind blowing around and caressing his skin when he was getting closer to the blazing sun. But if he really had no problem, then why would tying the rope on a branch seemed so hard he wanted to scream from frustration?

"Gah! Where did I do wrong?" Yukimura bit his lower lip to prevent himself from screaming. He had been sitting on the branch and working his hand all this time to get the damn rope tied tightly. But for some reason he kept doing it wrong, the rope kept slipping off his fingers and landed on the ground one time after another. He was starting to get a cramp already. "This's so annoying!" he huffed.

"Um… What are you doing?"

"H-HUH?" the brown haired boy snapped back to reality and faced the so-called-obstacle below him. "I-I just-…!" Swallowed by fear and panic, Yukimura lost his cool and got tripped by his own feet. "Oh no!"

"Watch out!" the young guy, Ieyasu, cried and quickly jumped up to make a hold around Yukimura's body before it could taste the hard surface of the somehow bumpy ground. Yukimura held his scream deep inside his throat and pinched his eyes close, waiting for the pain that never came. Curious about what happened and also surprised by the warm touch around him, he encouraged himself and cracked his eyelids open. "Are you okay?"

"Wha-...?" Yukimura stuttered, out of breathe when realizing the stance he was in. He didn't even know who the guy was and that man had him in his embrace, bridal style. Talk about a bad first impression, more if we included embarrassment. "AHHH! I'm-...! I'm sorry!" he screamed with a blush.

Yukimura was struggling to get himself free when the man tightened his hold on him, as if he was refusing to let go. "Hey, stop struggling! You'll get both of us down!" but Yukimura was out of his mind right now. No matter how hard Ieyasu told him not to, the young lad kept squirming and worsened their situation. Blame the embarrassment but this was a little bit too much.

And then, it happened. Ieyasu lost his footing and tackled himself with the roots under him. His face went pale in a second and Yukimura followed, realizing his mistake. Both of them stared at each other the moment their body went closer to the ground and at last tasted the earth below. Ieyasu yelped in pain, feeling something actually stabbed him in the back. It was nothing sharp but the feeling was certainly uncomfortable. But then, while the one he felt behind was all throbbing, the one he felt in front was a totally different taste.

Tell him he was imagining thing, but he was completely awake now to tell that he was experiencing the real meaning of youth. The smooth surface of a lips, clean from any material of make up and covered with the flavor of sweets… He was kissing a complete stranger… No, the stranger was the one who kissed him. Ieyasu's eyes were blank, empty due to the sudden cut of the circuit in his head. But the one that brought him back was the look at the guy's face.

"UWAAAAAA!" Yukimura screamed with a high tone, pushing Ieyasu futher to sink into the ground with both of his hand. He sat on top of Ieyasu who was looking at him with a questioned look. "I-I'M SORRY! I didn't know-…! I mean-…!" he was out of it. He shook his head around and gapped to find the best word he should say. But Ieyasu was staring at him dumbly. "What-…?" he gulped.

"You know…" Ieyasu started with a small chuckle. "I'm straight."

"Y-yes…?" Yukimura nodded but didn't actually grasp the meaning of Ieyasu's statement.

"So… Well, you're cute; I give you that. But I didn't think you're an aggressive type, seriously…" he smiled kindly but there was a hint of blush on his cheek. Ieyasu lifted his hand and pointed somewhere Yukimura's eyes followed. The young kitten didn't really like the idea of it, he had a bad feeling but what else could he do? He watched as Ieyasu guided him and took quite a while to register everything in his mind. "But yeah… I'm quite flattered."

Yukimura blinked. Ieyasu smiled. Yukimura blinked again. Ieyasu started to feel uneasy. Yukimura blinked for the third time. Ieyasu gulped and tried to calm his heart down. Yukimura then drew his hand back to himself and held it in front of his chest. Ieyasu then smiled again and scratched his cheek awkwardly. They stayed that way for quite a while, trying to find an escape from this awkward moment. And when they said awkward, they meant it.

And then… Yukimura broke it with his louder-than-ever scream.

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA! I didn't mean to touch your thing!" he jumped from Ieyasu and waved his hand around in panic. Only then Yukimura realized he had embarrass himself more than he already had. "I'M SORRYYYYYY!" and with that one last apologize, Yukimura departed from the scene with an unforgettable speed.

Once again, Ieyasu became the one left behind by the other. He gathered his remaining sense and pushed himself back up for the second time of the day. "Ah, I broke it," he pouted. Just like what he had predicted, the one he landed on when he fell was his poor mobile. So much for his luck, he bought it using his own money. "This is sucks-…" but then he fell into a deep silence, gazing toward the way the mysterious boy ran into. "Well, maybe not that sucks…"

He sighed but not because of exhaustion. His face were filled with a tender smile, but something that only could be called lust were mixed in it. "Man… that was my first kiss…" and that was how Tokugawa Ieyasu lost his first kiss in such a heroic way.

TBC.

And that's it for the second chapter. I'm actually a fans of DateSana but everything works for me as long Yukimura is the uke. What do you think? Bad? Good? Please tell me in your review. And please no flame, I'm not really good with the heat.

Oh, before I proceed with a deeper plot… I need to ask you, the reader, something. Who do you think should end up with Yukimura? Yes, it's always Masamune since they're the main pairing. But maybe I should change that with Ieyasu or Mitsunari as the lucky seme… They deserve some happy ending too! Well, everything will be decided by your vote. Please tell me in your review.

That's all. Thanks for reading.

Rie