Chapter 34
Ya know, I kinda thought I'd be struggling to control my anger towards Joker, what with his being a backstabbing, trust-yanking wanker and all. Surprisingly enough, though, I feel pretty calm. Really calm, actually. Like a fucking millpond. Oh, I'm sure shrinks and the like would have a field day, saying that I should be feeling something after such an egregious invasion of privacy. But I guess since I don't really care what those overpaid quacks think, it doesn't matter. Ooh, plus, I'm a Spectre, so if they piss me off, I can just throw 'em in lockup for a few days. Or shoot them. God damn, power does have its advantages, doesn't it Spike? And speak of the devil; I finally made it to the bridge. "How long until we hit the Strenuus system?"
Joker jumped at hearing Shepard's voice appear out of nowhere. "Ah, jeez, Commander. Are you ever going to stop sneaking up on me?" He cast a quick look back at Shepard, and saw that the man was fully outfitted for battle. How can he be so freaking quiet in that much armor?
"I don't sneak up on anyone, helmsman." Shepard replied with a negative shake of his head. "Now answer my question."
"Oh, right. Uh, roughly 90 seconds."
Damn I'm good. Shepard grinned victoriously. The cockpit remained silent until the Normandy dropped out of FTL and Shepard could see the yellow dwarf that gave the system its name. "Lieutenant, we're looking for a ship registered as the 'Majesty.' Her last reported contact was in this system somewhere, so see if you can find any trace of her."
Joker suffered through the uncomfortable silence for several minutes until he found something on the scanners. "Commander?"
"What is it?"
"I've got a ship on the mid-range scanners. Kowloon class, just like the Majesty."
"Excellent. Get us closer." Shepard stood and enjoyed the peacefulness of flying through space for a long ten minutes, while Joker began to fidget nervously. Ignoring his pilot's unease, Shepard pondered what he was going to do with his ground team. I obviously can't take Vakarian and Zorah with me anymore, since I'm having some major fucking trust issues right now. Shocking, innit? Ah hell, that sucks! They just got top-of-the-line armor and weapons, thanks to yours truly. Damn it! Get over it and move on, Spike. So, I have Wrex, Liara, Kaidan, and Ash. Hmm. I should just split them up into two teams of two, that way they can spend time working together and getting to know each other the way Zorah and Vakarian have. Easiest thing to do would be to stick the two humans together on one side, and the two non-humans together on the other; that way I don't have to deal with Ashley's xenophobia. But that seems like it's not only the easy way out, but also a waste of resources. My gut's telling me that Ash can handle being paired up with an alien. Which one though, is the question.
Eenie, meenie, miney, moe. Alright. I'll put Ash and Liara together. They should complement each other well, since Liara's a pure biotic, although her weapon skills have improved considerably, given where they were a month ago. Ash is a true soldier: I tell her where to go, and she goes. And shoots stuff along the way. Although I'd be lying if I said that having two wickedly hot women following me around doesn't do something for me. Because it does. A lot of something, actually. Imagine riding the tricycle with those two- no. I'm busy right now. Daydreams about having hot 'n' nasty monkey sex with two uber-hotties are for later. As far as the Wrex and Kaidan team goes, they're a good mix of tech, biotics, and weapons. I like them together. Plus, both teams have a more dominant, second-in-command type, namely Ash and Wrex; but they each have a thinker too, in Kaidan and Liara. Those two teams worked out alright when we were running through the sims on Pinnacle Station too, so if they bitch about it I can tell them that I have proof of the potency of the pairings. Ooh, nice alliteration. Alright, that's the plan, and it's fucking perfect. You're one brilliant hombre, you know that Spike? Oh look, we're here. "Joker, scan the ship. Make sure it's the Majesty, and see if there's anybody still alive."
Joker worked over the instruments for a short time, then looked up at Shepard to give his report. "It is the Majesty, Commander. Scans detect no life signs, either. From what I can tell, the inside of the ship is stripped completely bare."
Shepard instantly knew what he was dealing with. "Privateers." He spat out. "Joker, find out where that ship came from. Now."
"On it." Joker worked for another thirty seconds, and then looked up again. "Radiation trails from the Majesty's engines lead back to the planet Xawin."
Shepard nodded. "Pull up the bio for Xawin." Joker complied, and Shepard looked it over quickly. Fuck. Goddamn place is fucking cold as balls. Oh, and nearly constant ice storms? These bastards are intelligent. I expect them to have some substantial defenses in place before we even get into their base. So much for a fucking cakewalk. "Alright. We're dropping in the Mako in fifteen minutes." Before Joker could say another word, Shepard walked away, heading for the crew deck.
Well, that was odd. Joker thought to himself. Shepard wasn't, like, mad or anything, but he seemed kinda cold and distant. Maybe he's having a delayed reaction to the break-up? Oh well. I'm sure he'll just take out his frustrations on the privateers.
Shepard remembered to collect Kaidan and Liara from the crew deck before all three took the elevator down to the hangar. Once there, Shepard motioned to Ashley and Wrex, and the five of them made a little circle, just in front of the team's lockers.
"Alright, listen up. It has recently been brought to my attention that you four feel like you've been getting the shaft when it comes to going groundside. Well, that's gonna change." You da man, Spike! Way to spin the fact that you don't want anything to do with the other two members of the ground team and make it about these four. You sure you aren't related to Udina? Suppressing his instinctual urge to vomit at that thought, Shepard continued. "I've decided to split you four up, into two teams of two. And I gave considerable thought to balancing the teams' abilities, so please, no whinging about your partners. Ash and Liara? You'll be one team; Kaidan and Wrex, you'll be the other. I want you to spend a little time when you're off duty getting to know each other so that in the field things go smoothly."
"Now, about today's mission. We've found a privateer base, so I think it's gonna get messy. Kaidan and Wrex, you're on. Get your shit together and let's go kick some ass. Also, the planet's rated as a level one cold hazard, so make sure you button everything up. Join me in the Mako when you're done. We drop in seven."
When Shepard walked away, Liara turned to Ashley. "Chief Williams?"
Ashley sighed. I can't believe Shepard stuck me with the whiny one. I know I've been trying to be nicer to all the aliens, because he wanted me to, but this is ridiculous. God, Shepard, I hope you know what you're doing. "What is it, Liara?"
"I was wondering if you could tell me if there's any difference between 'privateers' and 'pirates?'"
A flicker of surprise crossed Ashley's face. "And you wanted to ask me? What for? Why not ask Shepard? You two seemed to be getting pretty cozy while we were docked at the Citadel." I know I shouldn't be jealous, but I am! Even though he spent just as much time in private with me, it still bothers me. I so want to see Shepard au natural, but he won't bite! Although maybe I put him off with that comment about how it was "against regulations" to kiss a superior officer. He should know I'm kidding. How could he not? He's intelligent, strong, successful, N7, and absolutely drop-dead gorgeous! What straight woman wouldn't be throwing herself at him, regulations be damned? I guess I can't fault Liara for trying, then. I just hope he picks me, and not her.
"Yes, I wanted to ask you. Shepard said that we would be working in tandem alongside him. I realize that things have always been tense between us, but I am willing to make an effort to become more, friendly, I suppose, with you. I do not want the Commander to get hurt one day, because we allowed a personal grievance to compromise our professional responsibilities. As to your question and comment about Shepard and I, he seems to be rather busy preparing for the mission right now. I did not want to distract him. To be honest, I cannot say that the Commander does not intrigue me. He is a very . . . unique person. I find myself drawn towards him, despite knowing that he is not likely to find me attractive." Liara finished with her eyes turned downward and her arms held protectively across her chest.
Damn her! I could get pissed off at her for bothering me, for trying to become my friend, or even for trying to get into Shepard's pants. But if she just wants to keep him safe, how can I argue with that? I suppose she has a point. We don't have to be friends, but we will have to be, at the very least, cordial. On a side not, how can she imply that he won't find her attractive? I have absolutely no interest in ever being with another woman, but even I have to admit that Liara has a great body. Not as good as mine, but still pretty good. "Alright, Liara. I'll try to explain it to you. First, though, I'll tell you a secret as long as you promise never to reveal who told you."
Liara perked up. "I promise."
"Okay. I don't think Shepard finds you unattractive. I've seen him checking you out, especially your chest. That's an obvious sign that he likes your body."
"Thank you, Chief." Liara gave the other woman a real smile. "I have seen him do the same to you, only his eyes tend to linger on your backside, especially when you're walking away."
This made Ashley grin. So you like my ass, Shepard? I wonder which one you like more, Liara's tits, or my tush? Mmmm, I wonder if he wants to spank it. Maybe if being subtle doesn't work, I'll try the more direct approach. "Shepard, do you think I have a spankable ass?" That would be so much fun. I suppose I can answer Liara's question now. She's been rather nice the last few minutes, so I guess she's earned it.
"Liara, call me Ashley. We're gonna be working together, so we may as well drop the formality." Liara smiled back at her. "Now, to the difference between pirates and privateers. Pirates will procure a ship somehow, then fly around until they find another ship, one that looks like it might be valuable or have valuable things in it. Then they forcibly dock with the other ship, board it, and kill or capture everyone on board. If the new ship is nicer than their old one, they transfer anything of value to the new ship, and leave the old one floating around. Then they go looking for another target, and the process repeats."
"What if the new ship is of less value than their current vessel?" Liara asked.
"In that case, they take whatever they can sell on the black market off the captured ship before flying away. Occasionally, they will try to ransom someone off. Usually that just gets the pirates killed though." Ashley stopped, making sure that Liara was following her explanation. "Privateers are a different animal. They set up a base somewhere, then send out sorties to capture ships. The captured ships are brought back to their base, where everyone is killed, the ship is gutted, then the ship is released to drift amongst the stars, an empty shell with no trace of where it came from."
"I see." Liara looked like she regretted asking Ashley to explain the distinction.
"Privateers are harder to deal with than pirates. Pirates, you can just blow up their ship, or board it and clear it. Privateers have a tendency to have well-fortified or well-hidden base stations, making them a real tough nut to crack." Ashley finished her lecture, and looked to Liara for any more questions.
"Thank you for explaining that, Ashley. You said that privateer bases are often heavily fortified; could that be a problem for Shepard?"
"Nah." Ashley waved her concern away. "Shepard's the best. And I mean that literally. Those privateers won't know what hit them. In fact, why don't we go up to the mess hall and watch the mission via Shepard's helmet cam. Then we can not only watch what he does to the privateers, but we can also try to get a better idea of how he functions in a combat environment. You know, what he sees, what he doesn't see, where he focuses his fields of fire, that sort of thing. It'll probably make us a better team when we go out together." I can't believe I haven't been doing that already. Being in space has made me stop thinking about the little things. Get it together, Chief!
"Okay!" Liara agreed cheerfully. I'm glad that Ashley and I are beginning to form a relationship. Is this why Shepard paired the two of us up together?
"Hey Tali." Garrus said as he approached the engineer at her workstation. "Got a minute?"
"I suppose, Garrus." She answered, as she turned away from her console.
I wonder why she's staring at the ground. Is something wrong? If she doesn't feel well, perhaps I should come back later to talk to her. "If you're feeling 'under the weather' as Shepard would say, I can come back later."
Surprisingly, Shepard's name made her shoulders hunch inwards even more. That's surprising. I thought she and Shepard were getting along rather well, based on how much time they spent together while we were docked at the Citadel. Although maybe something happened between them, which would explain why he hasn't taken the two of us out on any of the last four missions. Apparently, Tali and I are a package deal, so either one of us could cause us both to be grounded.
"No, I'm not sick." Tali responded quietly, still staring at the ground.
"Ok then. I was wondering if you had any idea why the Commander hasn't taken us out for missions lately? I understand that he wanted to work the other four members of the team into more groundwork, but something seems off. He's barely looked at me since we left the Citadel, which was over a week ago."
At Garrus's words, Tali suddenly broke down and started sobbing. Worried, Garrus stepped closer and put his arm around the diminutive quarian. "It's okay, Tali. What's wrong?"
I wish it were Shepard with his arm around me. Tali thought while trying, unsuccessfully, to control her emotions. But now I've ruined it, probably forever. He'll never touch me again after I betrayed his trust. I wouldn't be surprised if he leaves me behind on the next major planet we stop at, so he doesn't have to see me anymore. How could I have been such a fool? And to make matters worse, I hurt his relationship with Garrus too. I'm just a stupid little girl. It's no wonder he never looked at me the way he looks at Ashley and Liara. And now he never will.
"I'm s-sorry, Garrus." She managed to choke out. "It's all m-my fault."
Garrus's heart seemed to stop for a sickeningly long period of time, before starting up again and accelerating to mach one. "What do you mean, it's your fault? Why would something you did, if you did anything, change when Shepard takes us with him on missions?"
"I accidentally let slip that we spied on him while he was on Arcturus Station, and that we saw his girlfriend break up with him."
Garrus looked as if somebody had just kicked him in the balls. By the spirits, Tali, what were you thinking?! How could you tell him that? Of course he won't take us with him anymore, he probably feels like the three of us violated his trust. I would never expect him to bring someone he doesn't trust on a combat operation. "Why did you tell him that, Tali?" Garrus struggled not to shout at the defeated-looking quarian. "I thought we agreed not to mention what we had seen to him."
"I know we did." Tali hiccupped. "Do you think I meant to tell him? He just makes me feel so relaxed and comfortable that I forgot I was supposed to be keeping a secret from him. Well, I used to feel that way around him." Now I feel like nothing more than a fre'eg that he can't scrape off. Ancestors, I've never felt so worthless in my life. Not even when mother died.
"No, I suppose you didn't mean to tell him. But the fact of the matter is that you did, and now you've put all three of us in an untenable situation. To make matters worse, I don't have any idea how to fix the problem, either." She's obviously beating herself up about this. And, I would place even odds on her being distraught for all three of us, not just herself. Still, a part of me feels like her guilt is well deserved.
"I don't know either, Garrus." I wish I did, though.
"Perhaps we can wait it out. If we give him a few more days, he might calm down enough to where he feels comfortable working with us again." I doubt that will work, however. I know that a few days would never be enough for me to just forgive and forget what the three of us did. Additionally, based on the stories Shepard's told me, my gut instinct says that leaving him to forgive us on his own is the very definition of a fool's hope.
"Maybe you're right, Garrus." Tali said glumly.
"Well, that's what we'll have to do then." Garrus said, attempting to sound positive. "And in a few days, if he is still avoiding us, we'll go get Joker and the three of us can attempt to apologize again. I think if we tried that now, he would likely drop us on the next planet with sentient life on it." If we were lucky. Yes, forcing the issue right now would likely be disastrous. With time, we should be able to make him see reason. After all, Tali is the best weapon he has against the geth, and I'm the best pure shooter on the team, next to him. He'll need us before the end. We just have to make certain that we get back in his good graces before that point.
"Okay, Garrus." Tali answered.
"Good bye, Tali." With that, Garrus turned and headed back towards the hangar bay. Maybe I can do something to improve the Mako. He loves that vehicle, so improving it might in turn improve his opinion of me.