Title: Not One of Them
Pairing: Rachel/Quinn
Summary: Quinn just wanted to be alone. Rachel just had bad timing.
Disclaimer: Glee is not mine.
Warning: G!P Rachel.
A/N: This chapter is a little bit smaller, sorry. So, now I know where I'm taking this story and maybe that'll help me write faster. Maybe. Can't promise anything. Like always, your reviews are awesome, people. Thank you so much. Any questions or suggestions, feel free to PM me or you can find me on Tumblr (hellbrg). Now, go read. I hope you guys like it.
xxx
Quinn was lost. Her eyes met dark, angry ones when she finally opened them and a soft gasp escaped her still open mouth. In front of her, Rachel was so tense she wasn't breathing, her naked body as rigid as a rock.
Fuck. That wasn't supposed to happen. Santana was the one she considered the closest person to her, but she was the last one she wanted to find out about their... thing. Not like that, at least. She knew the Latina wasn't Rachel's biggest fan and she could see from the other side of the locker room how furious she was.
"No way," Santana said with a humorless laugh. "No fucking way!"
From her spot, the Latina couldn't see much because Rachel's body was covering Quinn's naked front, but she had a damn good idea what was going on behind the trembling diva's body. With narrowed dark eyes, she watched Rachel move her arm and whisper something to Quinn, who lowered her gaze a nodded firmly.
"Santana," Quinn called calmly and Santana would've been impressed if she wasn't so angry. "Could you please turn around so we can get dressed? I refuse to have this conversation with you while I'm naked."
The Latina scoffed and was about to say no, but then she saw the way Rachel's shoulders were shaking. Quinn had her bitch mask on, her hazel eyes were as cold as ice. Santana couldn't see Rachel's face, but she was pretty sure she wouldn't find the same defiant look there.
Huffing, she crossed her arms over her chest and turned around. "Be quick."
Behind her, she heard Quinn whisper something back to the smaller girl. She gave them thirty seconds before turning back around, facing them again. A smirk made its way to her face when Quinn glared at her while she pulled her skirt up and Rachel tried to cover her lower body with her dress. Santana's eyes fell to the obvious tent that the girl's compression shorts were trying to hide and one eyebrow went up slowly because, damn, Berry was packing some nice—.
"Could you pass me that?" Quinn's icy voice brought her back to the moment. She pointed toward the top that was lying on the floor beside her feet, but her eyes never left hers.
She picked the top up and stepped closer with a fake smile. "Sure."
Quinn saw the way Santana was looking at Rachel and she felt her blood boil. The diva was still getting dressed, so she took a step to the side, blocking Santana's view. She didn't bother to cover her upper body when the Latina handed her her top back — they had seen each other naked countless times.
"Rachel," she called without looking at her. "You should go home. I'll deal with Santana."
In front of her, the Latina scowled. "No freaking way," she spat. "The hobbit stays."
"Watch your tone, Lopez," the blonde growled. She wasn't sure who moved first, but they were suddenly too close, their noses almost touching as they glared at each other.
There was defiance written all over the Latina's face and Quinn was dying to put her back on her place, but a small hand on her back made her stop for a second. It wouldn't be the first time that one fight with Santana became physical — the brunette was the only one immune to her words, so her fists would make an appearance sometimes — and she lost count of how many times Brittany had to step in and break them apart.
Rachel's other hand grabbed her right wrist and pulled her away gently, putting some distance between the two angry cheerleaders. Now fully dressed, she met Santana's dark gaze. "I'll stay," she said.
"Damn right, you are, hobs." She smirked when Quinn growled beside the diva. "Calm your tits, Fabray. I don't think you understand what's going on here. You see, I forgot my phone inside my locker and decided to come back to get it. I was on my way out when I heard some weird noises coming from the locker room. First, I thought it was just Puckerman with some random Cheerio, so I decided to cock-block him just for the fun of it," she said with a shrug, like that was something she did every other day. Well, it was Santana they we're talking about, so it probably was. "Now, imagine my surprise when, instead of Puck, I found miss Ice Queen with RuPaul's giant head between her legs. Care to explain that, Q?"
Quinn rolled her eyes. "I own you nothing, Santana. I don't have to explain myself to you."
"Oh, but that's where you're wrong, Q," Santana retorted, eying the silent girl that was still holding the blonde's wrist. "You involved me when you asked— no, wait, demanded that I looked after hobs over here. It's funny because I was so sure it was some sort of prank. But, no, she is actually your new toy."
"I'm not a toy," Rachel said with as much confidence as she could muster.
"Berry, please." The Latina scoffed. Looking back at Quinn, she continued. "Was Hudson really that bad, Q? Oh, maybe that's not the right question. Is Berry that good? She is certainly better equipped than I thought," she added with a smirk, making the diva blush and the blonde growl. "How the hell did this happen, anyway? You hated her just last week."
Sighing, the blonde let her shoulders fall and shook her head.
"This is none of your business, Santana."
That was the part she was dreading: explaining. It was fine when it was just the two of them, they were just having fun... right? Beside her, Rachel was looking down, avoiding their eyes. She knew how this thing between them would look bad for an outsider — they were enemies, after all. It was simple when no one knew what was really going on. No one questioned her about the order to stop the bullying. Well, they did question her, but no one suspected the real reason behind it and Quinn wouldn't be the one to tell them the truth. It was easier to just ignore the weird looks and move on.
The problem wasn't just how it started, though. During the weekend away from the diva, Quinn started to wonder how long it would take for Rachel to start making questions. Labels, that was what really scared the blonde.
As if reading her mind, Santana let out the question that made the blonde's heart stop.
"Are you dating?"
"No," was her immediate answer.
Santana's eyebrows went up when the other cheerleader looked away, blankly staring at the opposite wall. She eyed Rachel carefully, the way the smaller brunette flinched away from the blonde and let go of her wrist as if it burned her. The diva's eyes lingered on Quinn for a few long seconds, but the blonde didn't look back.
"Interesting," Santana said. When Rachel looked at her, she tried to read the smaller girl. Usually, it was easy because Rachel was never scared to show her emotions, but not this time. Her brown eyes were as void as Quinn's normally were.
Quinn knew she didn't handle the situation well, but she couldn't deal with it in that moment. After putting her top back on, she faced the Latina once again and cleared her throat to get her attention. "Are we done here?"
"I guess..."
Nodding, the blonde chanced a look toward Rachel. She felt like screaming in frustration because, not even fifteen minutes before, she had the smaller girl naked and moaning, now she couldn't even see her face, her messy hair was covering it.
"Do you need a ride home, Berry?" she asked as calmly as she could with Santana watching her. There was no chance they would be going to her house after that.
Rachel shook her head. "I have my car. You can go."
She didn't understand why it hurt when the smaller girl didn't look at her, so she ignored it like she usually did and turned around to walk away. Maybe she shouldn't leave Rachel alone with Santana after the conversation they just had, but she was desperate to escape that locker room. She was doing it all wrong and she was aware of it. Later, though, she told herself. She would deal with it all later.
Before she could leave, she leaned closer to the Latina and whispered so only she could hear her. "You keep your mouth shut, S."
To her surprise, Santana just nodded.
From her spot near the bench, Rachel watched Quinn exit the locker room without looking back and sighed. There were so many things running through her head and she could already feel a headache coming her way. She had no idea how she was supposed to be feeling. Should she be angry? Hurt? Damn it, it wasn't like she expected Quinn to tell the word about their... thing. What was even going on between them?
"Berry," Santana called, bringing her back to the moment.
Tired, the diva just ignored the Latina and started to walk toward the door. A hand grabbed her arm, though, and made her stop.
"Hey, I'm talking to—."
"Leave me alone, Santana," she growled and yanked her arm away from the Latina's grasp, storming out of the locker room before the other girl could grab her again.
Now alone, Santana huffed and crossed her arms.
"Fucking moody bitches..."
xxx
Maybe that was not my brightest plan, Rachel mussed as she hid under the bleachers during lunch the next day. She had been avoiding Quinn and Santana all morning and she didn't dare go to the choir room or the auditorium to eat like she usually did, but the bleachers were definitely not her best choice. She was pretty sure people just went there to pee or have sex because the smell of urine was almost as bad as the ridiculous number of used condoms lying on the floor.
Huffing, she turned around to go back to school, but stopped when she spotted Santana standing a few feet away from her.
"Found you," she said with a predatory smirk on.
Well, damn it.
She considered turning around and running away like a coward, but her pride made her stay. Rachel Berry did not run away from a confrontation. Okay, she did occasionally. You could say all the time when Santana or Quinn were involved, but she was no coward! She just wanted to stay alive for a few more years, that's all.
"Santana," she greeted with a smile. "Nice to see you."
The Latina rolled her eyes. "Really, Berry? 'Cause I was almost sure you were avoiding me."
Rachel just shrugged because, yep, she was avoiding her.
After escaping the locker room the day prior, she drove back home to take a shower before going to her dance class. She arrived there one hour earlier and used the time to dance her confusion away, stopping only when she couldn't move anymore.
Questions about Quinn and their relationship never left her alone. Was there even a relationship? They weren't dating; they were just having sex. So what were they? When Quinn asked for a chance, what was she really talking about? What was she for the blonde? She wanted answers desperately, but she was also scared of them.
She considered asking Quinn, but something told her it would only frustrate her more if she confronted the blonde cheerleader. The way she reacted when Santana confronted her was enough to tell her she was uncomfortable talking about it. So she decided to give Quinn and herself more time to think about the whole mess they were making. Everytime she saw the HBIC coming her way, she would turn around and hide — like a freaking ninja, really —, successfully avoiding her. Yeah, she wanted all the answers, but maybe she was not ready for them just yet. And about Santana... well, she just didn't feel like dealing with her.
"Too bad," the Latina continued. "I kinda need to talk to you, so let's get out of here because this place stinks."
Nodding, Rachel followed her. Happy to be able to breath fresh air, she let the taller girl lead her toward a wooden bench not so far from the bleachers and sat down beside her, leaving some space between them.
"So... what do you want?" Rachel asked as she fished her lunch from her book bag. When she noticed the other girl didn't have anything with her, she cursed her own good heart and offered her half of her sandwich. It reminded her of that day on the locker room and how Quinn hesitated before accepting it. She wondered why she always ended up sharing her lunch with her tormentors. "Are you hungry?"
Santana narrowed her eyes for a second before taking the half that the diva was offering.
"You're welcome, Santana," the diva said, rolling her eyes.
"Whatever, hobs."
Rachel waited for the other girl to take a bite first and started to eat, too.
"You and Quinn," Santana said after she swallowed her food. "That's something I never thought would happen."
Huffing, the diva looked down at her sandwich and refused to say anything. There wasn't anything to say, really. To be honest, she never saw that happening either. Being with Quinn was something that only happened in her dreams before. It felt like a dream, all the time she spent with the beautiful blonde until that day. And the day prior felt awfully like waking up.
"You're really not dating?"
Rachel shook her head. "You heard her, Santana."
"Yeah, but I'm asking you now" was the Latina's response before she took another bite.
Maybe it was the lack of insults or maybe she just wanted to talk to someone about this. The girl was being uncharacteristically calm and she'd yet to make some hurtful comment, but she was still Santana, though. It was the way she was looking at her that made Rachel relax a little; there was no real malice in her dark eyes, something that was always present whenever Brittany wasn't around. And Santana knew what was happening, anyway. She saw it happening, as embarrassing as that was. There wasn't really anything she could say that would make it worse.
"No, we are not dating," Rachel said after a minute. She offered her almost untouched half to the other girl, not really hungry anymore, and tried not to smile when Santana quickly took it away from her with an eager look on her face. "I have no idea of what's going on, to be honest. It's... complicated."
"No shit," the Latina huffed with her mouth full, making the diva glare at her. After swallowing, she continued. "I mean, what were you expecting?"
"I don't know..."
"Berry, you're a lot of things, but you're not stupid." She stuffed the rest of the sandwich in her mouth, chewing happily for a moment. "Let's face it: Q is the biggest thing around here. She's that popular girl that every guy wants to be with, head cheerleader and ridiculously rich. I mean, no offense, but you're a loser."
Rachel rolled her eyes again. Something told her she would be doing that a lot in that conversation. "I'm aware, Santana."
"Look, I'm not trying to be a bitch right now," Santana said with a shrug. "I'm just keeping it real, okay?"
"I don't get it, though. Why are you being nice to me?"
"I'm not." She sighed. "You're not so bad, hobs, and Q is my girl. We fight all the time and I tell her I hate her ten times a day, but she is still my girl. I got her back and I know her. That's why I'm telling you right now that if you're looking for a serious relationship, you've got to stop whatever you're doing with Q 'cause that's not what you'll get from her."
She watched as the diva looked away from her and sighed. Even though she would never admit it, she knew Rachel as well. They grew up together, after all. Rachel was the kind of girl that wanted romance and commitment. And she just knew Quinn wouldn't be able to give that to her anytime soon. She had no idea why she cared so much, but she was just trying to do the right thing for once in her life and save them both the heartbreak.
"Are you in love with her?" she asked abruptly.
"No," was Rachel's honest answer. "I like her. Quinn is... wonderful. When she is not throwing slushies at me, I mean. And she is beautiful." So beautiful. "But, no, I'm not in love with her."
"Yet."
That small word made the diva stop. "Santana—."
"Why do you think Quinn won't date you?" the Latina interrupted her.
Frustrated, the smaller girl shrugged helplessly. "I don't know! Like you said, she's popular and I'm a loser. Or maybe it's because she doesn't want people to know that she is going out with the freak show of the town. I could be anything..."
"How much about her family do you know?" she continued with her apparently random questions and the diva tried to keep up with her.
"Not much," Rachel admitted. "I just know they are rich."
Santana scoffed. That was an understatement. Quinn's father was some important lawyer or some shit like that and he made sure everybody knew how much money he made. She only went to Quinn's house once and that was enough for her to never come back.
"I'm going to tell you something, Berry," she said slowly, "and if you repeat this to anyone, I'll ends you. Got it?" When Rachel nodded, she continued. "When we were kids, I basically went after you because you have two fathers. My own father was a dick, okay? He liked to talk about how wrong and disgusting it was for two men to be together and have a kid and I listened to his crap because I was young and he was like God to me. My mom kicked him out three years ago."
"That explains a lot, actually," Rachel said quietly.
"Yeah, but I'm free from him now." Santana focused on the girl beside her so she wouldn't get lost in memories she was trying really hard to forget. That was not why she brought it up. "But Q isn't free from hers," she added. Rachel frowned. "Her father is a jerk and her mother is a drunk. They leave her alone most of the time, as long as she doesn't screw up..."
The diva sighed, finally getting what the other brunette was trying to tell her.
"And she would screw up if she dated me," she finished.
"It's our last year, Berry, she won't risk it." She saw the way the diva's shoulders fell and tried not to feel bad about what she was doing because, damn it, she was doing the right thing. That's why she acted like a bitch all the time — at least, she felt good after that. "Q is smart, she's going to get out of this fucking hellhole. But she'll still need her father's money."
Rachel could understand that, she really could. They all wanted to leave Lima behind. And it wasn't like she wanted something serious with Quinn anyway, right? Okay, she totally lied back there. The romantic little girl inside her wished she could take the blonde out for dinners and bring flowers to her like in those cheesy movies she used to watch every Friday night with her dads, but her realistic side knew it would never happen.
Should she stop this thing with Quinn? The girl asked for a chance and she gave her one, but what did that mean? A chance for what?
"Whatever it is that you're doing with Q, I thought you should know about this." Santana's words brought her back. "But let me tell you something, hobs. Fuck buddies or not, you mess with her and you can say goodbye to your not so little friend down there. Like I said, Q is my girl. You mess with her, you mess with me."
"Of course."
"And this conversation stays between us." The last thing she needed was for Quinn to find out about their little talk. "It must be hard, but you better keep your mouth shut, dwarf."
She rolled her eyes again. "Of course," she repeated.
"Good." Now that the serious part was over, Santana's playful smirk came back to her face. "Now, let's talk about 'little Berry'—."
Rachel jumped from the bench and glared at her, blushing.
"We are not talking about my penis, Santana!"
"Oh, come on! How come someone so little can be so big?" Her smirk grew when the diva huffed in indignation.
"Shut up, Santana!"
"You know what? You should just come naked tomorrow and show to all those bitches what they're missing."
"I— What— Stop!"
The heaviness of the previous conversation died as the Latina continued to taunt her, making the diva become redder and redder with each comment. It was only when the bell rang in the distance that Santana stopped, clearly amused by Rachel's outraged face.
"I hate you," Rachel grumbled as the cheerleader stood up.
"Hate you, too, hobs."
She was making her way back to school, but stopped and turned around.
"You know, Q is probably pissed that you're avoiding her," she said. "And a pissed Quinn is a bitchy Quinn. So, do us all a favor and talk to her."
Santana waited for her to nod before leaving, thinking she deserved a fucking award did for doing such a damn good job.
xxx
It was only before last period that Quinn saw the diva that day. The smaller girl was walking down the hall with her usual confident smile on her face. She let her eyes run over the simple blue sweater she was wearing and her skirt that showed off her long legs. It was only when her brown eyes met hers that her smile fell for a second.
People around them stopped whatever they were doing to watch when the blonde girl stepped in front of the diva, making her stop. They were all eager to see what would happen and how they would act around each other after the HBIC made the other girl off-limits, probably expecting her to go back to her old ways.
They were all disappointed, though, because the only thing Quinn did was whisper something to Rachel, who nodded quietly before both girls disappeared down the hall.
"I haven't seen you today," Quinn said after they entered the auditorium. It was the first place she could think of that would give them some privacy. "And you weren't with Santana, either." She was sure of it; she checked three times.
Rachel didn't feel like lying to the other girl, so she shrugged before admitting, "I needed some space."
"Right..."
The awkward silence that fell after that made the blonde squirm, but she didn't let the other girl see it. Rachel went to sit on the last row and gently patted the seat next to hers when the blonde just stood there, watching her silently. She hesitated for only a second before approaching her.
"I think we should talk about what happened yesterday," Rachel said after she sat down. They were close enough for her to feel the way Quinn tensed immediately. Suddenly, the blonde wished Rachel was still avoiding her because she didn't feel like having that talk anytime soon. "That was," the diva continued, ignoring the blonde's discomfort. "Unexpected."
A humorless laugh escaped the cheerleader and she turned her head to glare at the girl.
"Are you being serious?"
Rachel huffed, not liking the blonde's tone. "Could you please refrain from snapping at me for the next few minutes?"
Quinn's eyes narrowed dangerously, but she held her tongue.
"I'm not happy about Santana finding out about us either, okay?" Rachel said before the other girl could form some kind of response. Something told her she wouldn't like it, whatever it was. Quinn had that glint in her eyes that told her she was about to go into full HBIC mode; she'd seen it enough times to know it by now. "I freaked out, too."
Taking a deep breath to calm herself, Quinn looked away from her. She wanted to yell and she wanted to punch something, but she also wanted to run her fingers through Rachel's hair that was even messier than normal and hug the girl and, fuck, she felt lost.
"She won't tell anyone," she whispered more to herself than the other girl because she needed that reassurance.
"I know."
They were back to silence after that. It was uncomfortable and heavy and Quinn had no idea how they went from laughing and kissing to that. It felt like reality just slapped her hard across the face, reminding her that Rachel was not some close friend but the girl she used to bully all the time. She remembered the promise she made to herself and to Rachel about changing, wondering what the hell she was supposed to do now.
"Quinn," the diva called softly. When conflicted hazel eyes met hers, she smiled sadly, like she knew what was going through the girl's head. "When you asked for a chance, what were you talking about?"
"I meant a chance to prove myself."
A chance to be a better person because she was so fucking tired of being her cold self all the time. She liked the way Rachel talked, how her silliness made her laugh. And she also liked the way Rachel looked at her, like she was some fucking Goddess or something.
All her life, she created this version of herself, powerful and collected. That's what people liked to see, that's what they were looking for. But now she could almost taste her freedom, her opportunity to be herself for the first time. Not the heartless girl, she wanted to be the girl that was obsessed with books and music and old movies and she knew Rachel fucking Berry was the only person in Lima that wouldn't judge her for that. She wanted someone else to see that side of her that she kept hidden, even if just for a few hours.
Maybe that's what she was looking for.
But she was still in Lima, Ohio. She was still in high school and living under her parent's roof. Even though she could taste it already, she didn't have it. After she graduated, her older sister left Lima without looking back and that's what Quinn also planned to do. But she had to wait a few more months.
A soft hand covering her fist brought her back to the moment.
"I understand, you know," Rachel said, "why you're scared."
Quinn scoffed. "I'm not scared, Berry."
She pretended not to see the way Rachel smiled.
"Right." The hand squeezed hers gently. "What I really want to know, Quinn, is what are we going to do about our situation. What do you want from me?"
Frowning, the cheerleader eyed the girl beside her carefully.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean that you obviously don't want people to find out about us and..." Rachel sighed. "It's okay, I guess." It wasn't, really, but she understood why. The fact that it wasn't just Quinn being ashamed of her didn't make her feel a lot better, though. "We can just stop it. I don't want to go back to the way we were before, but we can be just friends, right?"
The frown slowly disappeared as the blonde processed what Rachel suggested. The smaller girl was the one that avoided eye contact this time, pulling nervously at the sleeve of her blue sweater and waiting for her to answer.
Quinn knew that was the best option. They could be just friends and that would be easier to explain to her parents if they ever found out about what she was doing. But then she thought about that day in the locker room and the other few times they were together doing not-so-friendly things and how good Rachel made her feel. And then she thought about Rachel doing the same thing to some faceless girl while she was stuck being just friends and—.
"No."
Surprised brown eyes snapped to her and Quinn took a deep breath to calm herself.
"What?"
"No, we can't be just friends," she said slowly.
They would be stuck in that place between friends and lovers because she couldn't be anything more, but she also refused to be anything less. And that would probably bring so many problems in the future, but she wouldn't change her mind anytime soon.
"What if I just want to be friends, Quinn?"
The question made her freeze. "I— Do you?"
"Well, no, but I could." Rachel shrugged when Quinn shot her a glare. "We are together in this, Quinn. But are you sure you want to keep meeting like this? And Santana knows now, so she'll probably annoy the hell out of us and make stupid little jokes about it all the time." God, she was already exhausted just thinking about it.
Quinn huffed. "I can deal with Santana." As long as it was just Santana, she could do it. "We just need to be more careful. And that means no more sex in school for a while." Rachel tried really hard not to pout, she really did, but apparently it didn't work because the blonde serious expression vanished, replaced by an amused smile. "We'll just do it somewhere else, dork."
"That's okay, I guess," Rachel mumbled. "We can act like friends, though, right?"
"Sure."
Well, that wasn't so bad. She still felt like she just agreed to be Quinn Fabray's dirty little secret and she probably did, but she also got the chance to get closer to the girl that was such an enigma to her.
"Are you really okay with this?" The blonde asked.
No, not really, but— "Yes," she answered anyway.
Santana's words echoed inside her head for a moment.
It was a dangerous game they were playing and the rules were pretty clear to both of them. To protect her heart was rule number one and, in that moment, just before Quinn sealed their agreement with a simple kiss, she promised herself she would not let Quinn Fabray break it.
xxx
It'll move faster from here, I promise. Let me know what you think!