CHAPTER 3 - The Discovery

Morgana has only been awake for a few minutes, and yet in those minutes, her world has changed drastically.

She continues to lay in the bed she has been confined in, her eyes fixed on crystal blue eyes looking carefully into hers. Only a few words have been exchanged between the solitary pair in Gaius' chambers, but never have words carried so much weight given the situation. This new discovery gives Morgana a different perspective on who Merlin is. It is still unsure in her mind whether it's for better or for worse.

Morgana breaks the silence after what seemed to have been an eternity, "How can you live with yourself?" Her words come out accusingly, behind them are anger, desperation, betrayal, disappointment, and sorrow.

Merlin shifts in his seat, arms folded on his lap. He senses the emotions behind Morgana's question. Her words are more of a criticism than a question. He doesn't know how to address her. He searches around for words as he is interrupted by Morgana.

"I was alone Merlin. I was lost, I didn't know what was happening to me. I was so scared, scared of magic, scared that it was going to start corrupting me. That night that I opened up to you, you looked into my eyes and told me that I could trust you. I trusted you with my secret. How dare you pretend to be my friend? You. . . you . . . coward!"

Morgana is beginning to get infuriated, Merlin can hear it in her voice.

"Morgana. . . I . . ."

"No Merlin, you don't get to talk! You've had all the time in the world for that. All I needed was for someone to say it, to tell me it was magic and tell me what it's about. And all you could do was send me away to some druids? I didn't put those druids lives in danger, no, it was you! You endangered their lives, you took the accused villagers lives . How can you live in Camelot, protecting Uther, and not even lift a finger to protect your own?"

Morgana's words burned Merlin. The events and the consequences of that day have never left Merlin's thoughts. It still continues to haunt him.

"Do you think I do not regret the actions I took? Regret the decisions I've made?" Merlin answers back as he feels his voice getting louder. "Don't you dare put blame on someone when you yourself have committed horrible crimes. All the hard decisions I've made are for the greater good of Camelot."

"So poisoning a friend with Hemlock instead of letting a murderer like Uther die is for the greater good of Camelot?"

"It's not that simple Morgana. Innocent lives were at stake as well."

"So you decided to use my life to bargain with Morgause? Oh yes Merlin, Morgause told me everything. You told her in exchange for my life you wanted her to stop the attack and the curse."

"Morgana," answers Merlin, his voice becoming calmer, "you were the source of the curse."

Morgana's face betrays her as she is visibly surprised of the new revelation.

"But. . . but Morgause said . . ."

"You were the vessel for the curse. The only way to disable a curse so powerful is to eradicate the source. I had no choice, I had to kill you."

"There's always a choice. . .," Morgana whispers back, her mood shifting to defeat.

"You already made your choice when you cast the curse and put everyone's lives in danger."

She takes a few seconds to respond as she comes to a realization, "Merlin, I had no idea I was carrying the curse."

Morgana takes a deep breath in between, "I didn't know. . . but if I was really your friend, then why did you not trust me to do the right thing? You could've told me. . . I would have taken the poison willingly."

Merlin rethinks the events of that day. He has always believed that Morgana knowingly casted the curse and put everyone in danger. He did not expect to learn that Morgana was a victim as well. Nonetheless, Merlin's perception towards Morgana does not change, he still believes that she is dangerous and capable of malice.

Morgana's thoughts lead her to Morgause as she tries to comprehend her betrayal. The misunderstanding between Merlin and her about the events of that day resulted in grave consequences, which was made worse by Morgause's version of the truth. Morgana has always believed Morgause's explanation of that day, and it dictates her feelings towards Merlin. Her new discovery is leading her to change her mind. She looks down and rearranges the bracelet that Morgause gave her the first day they met. Her heart is leading her to a path of asking forgiveness, but looking at her bracelet forces her mind away from it. "Morgause has always been good to me, a true friend and ally, my flesh and blood, my sister in magic," she thought. "This servant boy is a traitor. I can never forgive him, I will not hesitate to kill him if I have a chance." She thought to herself whilst looking down on Morgause's memento. She snaps herself from her thoughts for a second and realizes her thinking. She instinctively removes her bracelet and resumes looking at Merlin.

"You had magic all this time. In my time of most need, you didn't help me. Why did you abandon me?" She is now sitting up from her bed, her hands fiddling with her bracelet.

"Morgana, if I had my way, I would've confided in you. I understand how you were feeling because I've been feeling the same way all my life. When I found out you had magic, I was geniunely happy. I was glad that I had someone that I could possibly share experiences with, and glad that it was someone like you."

"Merlin, I wanted to ap. . ."

Morgana is interrupted as the door to Gaius' chambers open suddenly to reveal a noticeably tired Uther. His hair is a mess and the bags under his eyes expose his lack of sleep. His melancholy mood is clearly visible.

Uther's eyes dart towards Morgana and his countenance shows utter disbelief. The sight of Morgana sitting up her bed causes him to break down. He runs towards Morgana and overlooks the presence of Merlin in the room. Uther embraces Morgana as Merlin decides to leave to give them privacy. As he is walking towards the door, he takes a few moments to look back and is met by Morgana's eyes looking back at him over Uther's shoulders. So much has been said between them.

Merlin continues to walk out of the room and forms a thought in his head, "I still cannot trust her. . ."

Thanks for the reviews: lightbane1905, battlemaiden518, renaissancebooklover108, thewolvesaremyfamily !

So, did y'all think Morgana was just going to be all weak in the knees and fall in love with Merlin? Well I wanted her to, but it would not have made sense. I always felt that her first reaction would be negative. Both of them have been portrayed to hate each other up to this point, they can't just do a complete 180.

I also wanted to address the events that happened in season 2 Fires of Idirsholas. I really thought Merlin's decision making is questionable there, and the only way to try to explain what happened is that they both had different ideas of what each other knew. I also strongly believe that Morgana would've taken the poison willingly if Merlin used his head and told her he loved her (then they would live happily ever after). hehehe

I'm starting to get excited for future Mergana stuff. Sorry it hasn't really come yet, but I still need to do some damage control because of dollop headed Merlin.