Music Choice: Claire de Lune by Debussy

Disclaimer: I do not own Merlin, but I still watch the episode "The Nightmare Begins" occasionally . . .

CHAPTER 6 - The Optimism

"Lord Godwyn is a serious ally. The strength of such a match cannot be underestimated," Uther whispers to Arthur while keeping his eyes on the approaching visitors in the great hall.

"Please tell me you mean a jousting match," Arthur is now looking at his father worriedly.

"I mean . . . a love match."

"Love?!" Arthur almost raises his voice to a very audible volume.

"Not love. Love has nothing to do with it, but the other bit. You know, a permanent union."

"Marriage?!" his face is now contorted.

Merlin could barely suppress his laughter as he overhears a few feet away from the royal father and son. He needs to tell someone about this. He instinctively looks down the great hall to search for a familiar face and he locks eyes with Morgana. He gives her a knowing smile and she responds in kind. A few seconds of their smiles and looks resemble a conversation as Morgana seemingly gets Merlin's message.

The preparations for the arrival of guests give a calming presence in Camelot while providing much-needed distraction. The tension between both Morgana and Merlin has eased because of recent events. One could even say that both are becoming friends again.

The silent conversation is cut short by Gwen clearing her throat. Morgana looks sideways towards her maidservant, as Gwen returns a small teasing smirk.

"Something wrong Gwen?" Morgana smiles at her innocently.

"I'm sorry my lady, did I interrupt anything," now Gwen giving her a full smile.

"Gwen!"

A clumsy woman distracts the women's exchange, probably Princes Elena, as she falls flat on her face in front of Arthur and Merlin. Merlin and Morgana can't help themselves but to look at each other again from afar to discuss what just happened.

After the awkward introductions and meeting, Arthur races out of the great hall to look for Gwen. He finds Gwen with Morgana and orders Merlin to pick up their guests' things. Arthur and Gwen walk ahead of Merlin, as he is left to pick up the guests' bags. Morgana takes the opportunity to have a small chat with Merlin.

"Hello Merlin."

"Oh hello Morgana," he eyes the bags on the floor. "Does no one pack lightly anymore?"

Morgana gives off a small giggle, "Well, nobles don't see it that way. Besides, it seems our Princess Elena will need all the pretty dresses and makeup she can to impress Arthur."

"All she'll need is a big stick to hit him in the head with, she can probably convince him they're married after enough knocks on the head."

Both of them laugh at the picture.

"Thank you again for helping me get settled last night," she smiles at him.

"No problem Morgana," he gives off a smirk. "Nothing really I could do since the royal prat volunteered me."

"Oh . . ." she answers dejectedly.

" . . . I mean, it's not that I didn't want to help. I'm always glad to help. I didn't mean it that way," he stumbles on his words as he looks away from the bags on the floor to look at Morgana.

He decides to change the subject, "I haven't had time to look into your bracelet yet. But I have a source that I would like to check with."

"That's fine, thank you Merlin," she responds as she places her fingers to touch his arm. "You've been so nice to me considering everything I've done. I'm thankful for that."

Morgana's words are sincere, she really is grateful. She is glad to have someone like Merlin. She knows that they might still have a long way to go, but she cherishes having someone she can be herself with.

She doesn't hold herself back as she closes in to dissipate the distance between them. She doesn't realize how tall Merlin is as she has to look up at him. She stands taller and slightly tip-toes to give him a small peck on the cheek.

It all happened so fast for Merlin but his cheeks are already a bright shade of red. His first instinct is to look around for any spectators. He sighs with relief as he sees no one around, but his demeanor changes to anger as he looks back at Morgana.

"Morgana! You have to be careful," his eyebrows coming together to show his rage. "If anyone saw, especially Uther, I would've been beheaded on the spot! You shouldn't have been so careless."

Merlin's anger takes Morgana by surprise as her face displays her shock. All she did was display her thankfulness and give a gesture of her genuineness. It felt like the right thing to do at the moment so she acted on it.

Her eyes begin to water, but she turns away to hide herself from Merlin. She briskly walks away and is able to force out words, " . . . Goodbye Merlin."

"Wait . . . wait . . . Morgana . . .Morgana," but she has already turned the corner.

"Great Merlin, she was just trying to be nice. Why do I always take the wrong decisions with her."

He makes a mental note to himself that he should apologize to her. He knows that she is still in a fragile state, and he wants to make sure that Morgana is never in a condition where she could be susceptible to evil.

He finally mounts all the belongings to himself and he catches up to Gwen and Arthur.

"And Merlin, it would be good if the bags were to arrive before they did," Arthur instructs Merlin as he comes into view.

Merlin proceeds to pass the couple who are deep in conversation. He wonders why those two continue to hide themselves from him. Evidently, they have feelings for each other.

###

Morgana has been lying down on the bed that Merlin has set for her last night, she has cried but her tears are now dry. She is staring up at the ceiling trying to forget the face that Merlin gave her. Trying to forget him at the moment is difficult, since the spare bedroom that she is in reminds her of Merlin.

A knock on her door disrupts her thinking, "Come in."

Gwen enters the room and Morgana's heavy heart lightens at the sight of her friend. Her long time disappearance from Camelot and her sister's hatred for Camelot has hurt her relationships, even with Gwen. But it didn't take long for them to rebuild the relationship that they once had.

"My lady, what has happened?"

"Oh nothing," she responds.

"Surely you wouldn't have been crying if it was nothing?" Gwen asks her.

"Gwen, really, it is nothing," she lies back poorly.

"Come on my lady, out with it," she begins walking towards the bed. "What did Merlin do now?"

"Gwen!" Morgana exclaims back. "It's not like that. It's just that . . . well . . . why are they all so . . . stupid?"

"So it was Merlin?"

Gwen proceeds to sit next to Morgana on the bed to comfort her as Morgana recounts what happened. She describes his reaction and the face he made as accurate as she can.

"My lady, do you remember when Merlin first came to Camelot. How I once fancied him?"

"Yes I do," Morgana recounts. "I believe he also felt the same for you. He was ready to die for you at one point."

"Well, that is not entirely true," Gwen corrects her. "He actually did not feel the same way for me."

"Oh, is that right?"

"My lady, one thing that you need to know about Merlin is that even if he may be quick-witted and knowledgeable, he can be oblivious and clueless about women," Gwen elaborates. "He never did notice the signals that I have given him, until to the point that we kissed. Actually, even then, he might not have had a clue."

"Oh," Morgana responds with an unknown feeling that she couldn't describe. "Merlin kissed you?"

"No, my lady. I kissed him," Gwen explains, eyeing her curiously. "The conversation we had afterwards was awkward, but it seems that he had no idea all along."

"How simple-minded of him."

"Well, that's just who he is my lady. He really just cares about people," Gwen answers. "So if you want him to know your feelings, you will have to tell him directly."

"No, no, no Gwen," Morgana defends as she shift uncomfortably in the bed. "You misunderstand, I don't like him in that way. I am just thankful for his friendship."

Gwen eyes her questioningly. "Whatever you say my lady." She gives Morgana a smirk.

Gwen has known Morgana for a long time, and she has seen the friendship that Merlin and Morgana shares. She saw how close they became over time, and even swears that there was an attraction between them. But recently, she can see that Merlin and Morgana's relationship has not been completely friendly. She attributes it to something happening between them that she doesn't know about.

Gwen makes a promise to herself that she would help them. She would try her best to make sure that her two closest friends find their way back to each other. Back to being good friends once again.

The door to the chambers open slightly, and Gwen immediately knows who is behind it. Only one of her closest friends enters chambers carelessly.

"Morgana?" the voice behind the door says.

Morgana looks at Gwen as she silently signals her to have Merlin go away.

"Yes Merlin, she's here," Gwen answers as she smiles at Morgana. "She's been waiting for you."

Morgana gives Gwen a look as Gwen proceeds toward the door. She lets Merlin in, as she lets herself out. " . . . I have to do some errands for Princess Elena." Gwen closes the door behind her, smiling her way down the hall.

"What are you doing here?"

"Morgana, we got off the wrong foot earlier."

"I think it was a little more than that Merlin."

"Okay, you're right Morgana," he moves forward. "I was wrong to lash out at you that way."

Morgana looks away from him and decides to stroke her hair with her fingers.

"It's just . . . I got worried," he continues. "I got worried for me, and I also got worried for you."

Morgana continues to avoid him, playing with a strand of her hair.

"Morgana . . . it's just . . . I am so happy that you're back and that you can come back as the Morgana I knew. As much as Arthur, or Gwen, or Uther wanted you found when you were lost, I had a heavier burden to find you. I wanted to keep looking for you because I know I am the one who hurt you. So when we finally found you, I promised to myself that I will not make the same mistake again, I won't betray you, and I won't lose your friendship," Merlin states calmly. "And now, I feel that we can have a deeper bond. We both know each others deepest secret. We both share the same gift. You don't understand how much I've always wanted to tell you. To have someone who I can be open with about magic and share those experiences with. When we were in a situation that could jeopardize that . . . I got scared, and I reacted on impulse. I shouldn't have gotten angry at you."

Morgana looks back at Merlin, "Really?"

"Yes Morgana, really," he responds. "I want to share my magic with you. I want to show you that it can be a force for good. That it can be used for beautiful things."

Merlin is now standing in front of Morgana who is still sitting on her bed. He puts his palms together and looks down on his hands. Morgana looks at his hands wondering what he is doing.

Merlin incants a spell,
Blóstmá
His eyes shine gold and he opens his palms to show a single red rose.

Morgana looks at the rose and then at Merlin. His gesture has brought her eyes to water. "It's beautiful Merlin."

Merlin forms a smile and proceeds to place the rose behind her ear. His hands working ever so delicately on her smooth skin and soft silky hair. She's never imagined that someone like Merlin, with hands roughed up from daily use, can be so gentle.

"Well, I can't say I've done that spell many times before," Merlin explains with a tinge of sadness as he is reminded of when he procured a similar rose for Freya in the past. "But let's just say that it is necessary at this moment."

Morgana reaches up to where the rose is positioned on her ear to feel it's presence there, "Thank you Merlin. I love it."

With a sigh, he examines Morgana's face. The color of her lips perfectly matching the solitary rose on her hair; her skin, flawless and pale, tempting his hands to reach out to touch. With each second of taking her in, he finds it harder to deny the truth. "Are my feelings for her coming back?"

She now focuses on Merlin's bright blue eyes, "Can I ask for your permission?"

"What is it Morgana?"

"Can I give you a kiss on the cheek now?" Morgana asks innocently, her eyes still watery as she is close to tears.

Merlin simply gives her a smile. Morgana stands up and positions herself close to him like before. This time, both her hands are rested on his chest, her arms folded between them, as she decides to deliver a small kiss on his other un-kissed cheek.

Their position is perfect. The contours of their body complementing each other. Both are tempted to stay in their closeness and savor each other's scent. But alas, Merlin decides to move away, still with worry in his heart. He has a million reasons why he should not stir those emotions he once had for her. His pessimism getting the best of him.

Instead, he offers her what he can give her, his friendship, "Morgana, would you like to practice spells with me?"

Morgana's smile reaches from ear to ear, excitement fills her heart, "Oh Merlin, absolutely I would love that." She thinks of all the spells that she has missed out on since her repertoire mostly included unfriendly and offensive spells.

"Wonderful, I'll try to find time tonight," he says to her. "Hopefully prince pratface would be too preoccupied with his new lover."

Morgana sends out a giggle, "I would love that Merlin. Thank you for offering."

"Okay then. I just wanted to come in to apologize. I really am sorry for before."

"I forgive you Merlin."

With that, Merlin's heart is content. He bows to Morgana to signal his exit.

He recounts what just happened and is happy with how he handled it. Now he can continue to go do his chores peacefully since he knows Arthur has plans to ride with Princess Elena.

"MMEERRLLLIINNN!" he hears Arthur's voice in the hallways. It seems that he is to accompany him and Elena on their ride. "Whatever," Merlin says out loud. "I can probably go out and collect some of Morgana's favorite flowers on the ride," he absentmindedly thinks to himself as he doesn't even realize how much he thinks of Morgana lately. Maybe he is just caught up in the moment. Or maybe, he simply is becoming more optimistic.

R&R please