Music Choice: Piano Sonata No. 14 in C sharp minor ('Moonlight') by Ludwig van Beethoven

Chapter 12 - The Confrontation

His footsteps fade into silence as she continues to stand alone in the alcove.

"Why does he choose to torment me like this. First he's cold towards me, then the next moment he does . . . he does . . . something like that!"

Her hand unconsciously caresses the last traces of his lips on her cheek as she battles the inner voice in her head. One voice is telling her to chase the man down, trap him into the next nearest alcove, and plant a long kiss on him. The other is telling her to keep it together.

She walks out of the alcove and heads toward the dining hall. The picture of the man in the alcove still etched in her mind, taking all of her attention and concentration away that she doesn't even notice Gwen waiting outside the door. She nearly jumps when Gwen greets her.

"Good evening my lady, King Uther and Prince Arthur are already seated." She eyes Morgana questioningly. "Are you well my lady?"

"Oh yes," she answers. "Sorry I was just in deep thought."

"Very well, have a seat. I will serve you some wine."

Morgana glides into the dining hall, greeting both the King and Prince. She daintily takes her seat as Gwen pushes her in. Gwen is the only servant in attendance tonight, probably a good circumstance to be in given that having the young prince's servant here would make an already awkward dinner even more uncomfortable.

Additionally, Arthur's uneasiness is not helping with the mood of the dinner at all. She knows that something is bothering the young prince, and she feels it has likely to do with Uther's forceful nudging of him to get closer to a certain royal guest. She has seen Arthur try to get to know Elena, but there simply isn't any hope of him having any type of love relationship with her. She understands how hard the circumstance is, if she is being honest with herself, she probably would have taken a more vocal approach to being forced on someone she doesn't love.

The thought of being arranged to someone she doesn't love irks Morgana, and it brings about thoughts of Merlin. She hastily clears her mind to avoid displaying any symptom of love sickness. She looks up from her plate to watch Gwen whisk around the table serving food and wine to the diners. The same sadness that she saw in her eyes is still obvious in her; however, it seems that she isn't the only one that has noticed it. Arthur has been watching her too; apparently aware as well that Gwen hasn't been herself lately.

In the background, Uther babbles on, completely unaware that both his dinner guests are more interested on the servant serving them than their king. Arthur finally breaks his gaze upon Gwen, much to Morgana's surprise since his eyes seemed glued to her figure, communicating to her, pleading to her. It's as if there is some longing in his stare.

"It couldn't be . . ." Morgana's eyebrows arch at the question in her mind.

Arthur clears his throat as he decides to join the one-man conversation that has been going on through supper.

"Father, there is a delicate matter I wish to discuss with you."

"Your proposal. Excellent! We must make a fuss," Uther shifts his gaze to Morgana. "Women like that kind of thing, isn't that right, Morgana?"

She is caught by surprise since she has been focusing on the question that is creeping in her mind. She plays herself off coolly, "I have no idea. I'm delighted to hear the news, though." She continues to observe Arthur and Gwen.

"I couldn't be more thrilled," Uther says.

"She's a wonderful woman," Morgana answers, but still studying.

"She'll make a wonderful wife," Uther faces Arthur once again. But Arthur's face looks unhappy.

"No, she won't. Not for me anyway. Father, I have tried to get to know Elena, but the truth is, I have no feelings for her. I'm, I'm sure she's a wonderful person, but I cannot marry someone I don't love," Arthur responds back.

"You can, and you will."

Arthur once again looks at Gwen, and this time, Gwen reacts visibly. Morgana watches the quick exchange, and her question is answered. Not only does she find out that Arthur's heart may already be for someone, but that someone, Gwen, may share the same feelings as well.

Morgana looks on as Gwen's countenance betrays her hurt and pain at Uther's mention of Arthur's impending marriage. Suddenly, it all makes sense to Morgana now. Gwen's sudden change in mood, and her very busy schedule. It all began when Princess Elena and Lord Godwyn arrived. Arthur and Gwen have feelings for each other.

As quickly as Arthur and Gwen's gazes ended, the weight lifted from her shoulders, the shackles holding her heart back has been released. All Morgana can think about now is the man in the alcove. The man that she may have hurt again. She wants to make amends, in fact, she needs to make amends.

But before that, her heart is heavy for her best friend and her brother. Both of them having feelings for each other is somewhat surprising to her, but after a deeper investigation of the matter, it actually makes sense. Gwen and Arthur complement each other. Where one has a weakness, the other has strength. They are a good match. However, in Uther's eyes, this would not matter. The only fact that would be of importance is if there is any benefit for the kingdom.

She is intent on helping them. Supporting their match even in front of Uther. "He cannot command his subjects on who they can or cannot love."

Morgana strongly believes this for Arthur and Gwen, but subconsciously, she wants to fight for Arthur and Gwen because she is in a similar situation herself. It shouldn't matter the station or rank of the people involved, as long as there is love, the heart cannot be denied.

###

Dinner ended rather early because Arthur couldn't wait to leave and Morgana felt that she needed to get out as soon as possible to speak with Merlin. There is so much that she wanted to tell him. She needed to apologize to him for being unfriendly, and also to discuss Arthur and Gwen. She feels that if there is someone else that should know, it should be Merlin. Moreover, she knows that Merlin will be able to give good insight on the matter since he's always planning and scheming.

Gwen is finishing the rest of her chores in Morgana's chambers while Morgana sits pensively, watching Gwen move. She still has Merlin on her mind, but she wants to take this time to talk with Gwen as her friend.

"I wouldn't like to be in Arthur's shoes."

"What do you mean?" Gwen looks at her in question.

"Forced to marry someone against his will."

"I don't think he'll marry her if he feels that way."

"I know it's hard to believe, but he may not have a choice. Even if it isn't what he wants. Even if his heart belongs to another?" Morgana looks imploringly at Gwen. "Even if she feels the same way. Gwen, we've known each other for too long, I can see it in your eyes. You like him, don't you?"

Gwen's countenance changes, "No. Don't be silly."

"And he likes you," Morgana smiles at Gwen as she moves next to her to place her hand on her shoulder.

"It can never come to anything."

"Nonsense! Why would you say that?"

"Morgana, he is crowned prince of Camelot . . . and I am just. . ."

"A servant? Why should that even matter? Why should you let anything of that nature hinder you?"

"Well, hundreds of years of tradition cannot simply be overturned."

"It's about time for it to be overturned then! Why should it matter that a noble has feelings for a servant? It shouldn't matter anyone's rank or family. No one should be able to tell you who your heart desires. The heart wants what the heart wants."

"But Uther would never allow anything . . ."

Morgana interrupts Gwen, "Uther has no right to stop love!"

"Love? Morgana. . .I didn't say anything about love . . ." Gwen looks inquisitively at Morgana, perhaps too obviously that Morgana looks away from her gaze.

"It's just something that I've been thinking a lot about recently," Morgana directs her eyes back at Gwen. "What I have found out is to never hide your feelings because of fear. Doing so could cause you to lose more than what you think you could gain from secrecy. . . I almost lost it all Gwen. That's why I don't want you to give up."

"Morgana, what do you mean you almost lost it all? Uther and Arthur never stopped looking for you when you disappeared," she says. "Even Merlin couldn't hide his feelings from me. He was always looking for you too, always saying that he did you wrong."

"Yes, well. . . that's fortunate for me that I was found," Morgana chooses to move the focus back on Gwen. "Nonetheless, I think Uther's mad, I think all nobles are mad. People should marry for love, not because of tradition." Morgana sighs deeply, as both women share an embrace before Gwen heads towards the door.

"Morgana . . . do you really believe that? Do you think that a servant has as much right to love as a noble does?"

"With all my heart . . . "

Gwen smiles at Morgana before leaving her alone in her chambers.

###

Morgana dons her hooded cloak, preparing to visit Merlin late in the evening. She knows she wouldn't be able to sleep with the thought of what she did to him earlier this evening.

She heads to Gaius' chambers through the least used passages to avoid any guards and distractions. Unfortunately, because of recent events and having royal guests, additional guards have been stationed around the castle, forcing Morgana to explore more of the secret passages of the castle.

She walks down a dark passage, illuminated by only a few candles when she feels a presence nearby. She quickly turns around to look for the presence, but she jumps as she feels a cold hand press onto her shoulder. She turns again and sees a face that she hasn't seen in a few days, Morgause.

"Hello sister," Morgause is nearly in tears as she extends her arms to give Morgana a hug. "I've missed you."

"As I have," Morgana gives her a hug in return. Most recently in her life, Morgause has been her source of strength, her help in time in need . Seeing her should have made her ecstatic, but her reaction is a little more of indifference. "Sister, why are you here?"

"I have been worried about you. I haven't heard word of you since you were healed of your injury," Morgause is now holding Morgana in front of her. "I wouldn't know what to do if you were hurt again."

"Please don't be alarmed sister, I am perfectly well," Morgana answers.

Morgause combs a loose strand of Morgana's hair behind her ear, "then why haven't you contacted me sister. I have become worried."

"No reason at all, I have become busy," Morgana crosses her arms. She has some resentment towards Morgause for what she did to her without her knowledge. She found out that Morgause used her as a vessel for a curse without her knowing and that the sleeping bracelet she gave her has dire side effects. Additionally, she is hindering her from seeing Merlin.

"What is wrong sister?" She places her hand on Morgana's arm, but she moves away. "Are you unhappy with me? Have I done you wrong?"

"Have you done me wrong?" She answers mockingly. "There has always been this nagging question that I've always wanted to ask you, and it's a subject that you usually do not like to discuss."

"What is this about sister?"

"When the curse fell upon Camelot that put everyone to sleep, there had to be a vessel for the curse, correct?"

". . . Yes. How do you know of thi. . ." Morgana doesn't allow her to finish.

"Tell me this, what was the vessel for the curse. Or should I say who?"

"What are you asking me sister?"

"No more lies Morgause. Tell me, did you use me as a vessel for the curse?"

". . . I did," tears begin to form in her eyes as she pleads to Morgana. "But I only did it for our cause, I did it for you. For you to be free."

"You made me the vessel without telling me? You used me? Manipulated me? Am I an object to you?" Morgana's voice becomes louder.

"No sister, of course not. I only did it for you because I love you."

"You love me? How can you say that then use me like an object? Then continue to lie to me?" Morgana begins to move away from Morgause. "Then there's the bracelet you gave me. It did indeed give me better sleep, but at the price of losing myself. What other lies and secrets have you been keeping from me?"

Tears are now falling from Morgause's eyes, the only person she has left that she loves seems to be fading away from her. "No my sister, I only tell you the truth. I'm sorry, I didn't know about the bracelet, I only meant to give you peace. Please forgive me."

"No Morgause, this is a betrayal of my trust. How do I know that you haven't been lying to me about anything else? I think you need to leave now."

"Morgana, you cannot turn me away, you're all I have. The only one left that I love."

The Camelot warning bells ring loudly around them, indicating that an intruder is in Camelot.

"Morgause, you need to leave now. I will reach out to you in time, but right now, I cannot look at your face."

"Morgana, I love you. I cannot lose you," her sobbing becomes more uncontrollable as Morgana helps her up and pushes her to leave.

"Morgause, you need to leave now."

Morgause unwillingly moves, but the sounds of approaching guards compel her to leave. She takes a second to look longingly at Morgana before she disappears in the darkness, leaving Morgana in the hallway alone.

Camelot knights fill the hallway in no time. "Lady Morgana, are you safe? You need to return to your chambers, an intruder has been sighted, and a servant was injured."

Morgana looks at the tall Sir Leon approaching her side. "I shall escort you back to your chambers."

"Thank you Sir Leon," she forces a smile.

"I'm sorry to ask my lady, but what are you doing out and about in the halls so late this evening?"

"I just wanted some fresh air, and to see Camelot under the light of the moon. It gives me peace," she answers.

"Well my lady, if you would like. I could escort you for some fresh air tomorrow?"

"That's a generous offer Sir Leon, but I will be busy tomorrow. Perhaps another time."

"Of course my lady, I only meant to ask," Leon smiles at her. They continue their walk in silence all the way to her chambers.

Happy New Years everyone (belated . . .)

I sincerely apologize for not updating in a month. I really haven't been in the writing mood.

Sorry for the short update here as well. To make up for it, I already have an update lined up by the end of the week! Also, I will start to diverge from canon very severely in the next chapters (and also plenty of MERGANA! FINALLY :D).

Additionally, thank you soo much for the comments! I wouldn't have been able to force this one out if it weren't for you guys. Note that I WILL ALWAYS BE MERGANA. I just got interested with Merthian momentarily, but I will always and forever ship MERGANA.

Thank you all

January 7, 2014