Chapter 4 – When Brothers Train

Itachi was at home when he returned that evening. He was supposed to be out, on some mission. But he wasn't and he was dressed in plain clothing instead of the anbu uniform. He was sitting around the kotatsu with Mikoto, a smile on his face and a cup of tea in his hands.

Sasuke stood frozen in the doorway when they both turned towards him. Evening sunlight filtered in from behind him.

"Ah, he's here," his mother said. "Come sit with us, Sasuke. Itachi went to bring you from the academy but you had already left. What took so long? You should have reached here before him."

"I … took the longer route," he told her blankly. He had to force his legs to move jerkily towards the table, and sank down. When his hands were out of sight beneath the cloth, he clenched them onto his knees. Aniki had come to pick him up from school. He and aniki and oka-san were sitting together. Like they hadn't in years. What was happening?

"Iruka-sensei told me some interesting things," Itachi added, putting the empty cup aside. "He said you scored perfect on your exam. Well done, Sasuke," he reached forward to gently tap the smaller boy's forehead.

Sasuke gritted his teeth and forced himself to nod.

He and Itachi nii-san and oka-san were sitting together.

"But he also said you walked back with that boy," Mikoto told him sternly, leaning toward on the table. "Sasuke you already know that you're supposed to stay away from him."

But a soft hand on her arm made her pause. She looked at her other son questioningly.

"Don't be so harsh, oka-san," Itachi said softly. "It's not that boy's fault."

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at that. Seeing it, his brother continued.

"They have us watch him sometimes, during the festivals when he's most likely to be harmed," there was no question that 'us' referred to the anbu operatives. "He's a rowdy child, but he means well. I think it is alright if Sasuke walks with him now and then."

Mikoto was still unsure. "Itachi, you're not aware of-"

"I am, oka-san. Secrets are not kept so well in anbu."

She paused, and then sighed, turning back to Sasuke. She never could resist her eldest son; he had an air that made him seem wise despite his small, lithe form. "Alright. Maybe a few times. But don't make it a habit, ne? You hold our clan's reputation as well."

Sasuke nodded wordlessly, still preoccupied by the fact that … that he and oka-san and nii-san were … just like all those years ago …

"You're looking at me so curiously, Sasuke," Itachi observed, slightly amused. "You're wondering why I'm here, right? Why I'm not on my mission?"

He couldn't speak. He would regret anything he said in front of this person. So he nodded again, feeling like a mute.

"Ah, just some minor problems, Sasuke," his mother rushed to say. "Nothing to worry about-"

"I'm being suspected of murder right now," Itachi told him. He turned to Mikoto, "oka-san, he should know. He's part of the family, right?"

Family.

"Fine..." she relented, loosening her grip on his arm.

Itachi smiled when he turned back to the younger boy, "I'm being suspected as Shisui's murderer. Danzo-sama is keeping me within the village until they can clear my name."

He was losing. There was no way to pull himself back up. He wasn't yet gone completely, but he was fading. Slowly. Into the background of his own mind, reduced to observer. The uncontrollable muscles in his face burst into an exaggerated frown.

"Well they'd better do that soon," Sasuke said empathetically, "you didn't kill anyone." He paused. "But if it means that you can stay here and train with me instead of going on missions, they can investigate for a long time!"

No. Don't go near him. Stop leaning forward.

His mother chuckled, raising one hand to her mouth. "Oh, Sasuke. Selfish little boy," she said cheekily, "but maybe you deserve it, since you've done so well in school …"

"That's what's weird," Sasuke went on, gesturing dramatically with his small hands. "I don't know how I did that well, I didn't study at all!"

"At all?" Itachi smiled.

"At all," Sasuke agreed. "At least, I don't remember studying. I think I have that brain-thing, like the old people at the hospital. Cause I can't remember lots of stuff."

Stop it. Shut up. Stop talking and leave, you little fool.

"You … don't remember?" Mikoto asked curiously, folding her arms in front of her.

"No!" He replied. "It's like, one moment I'm washing my face, and then I'm in the academy, and then I'm here. I don't even know why I walked with that boy. I don't like him, and otou-san won't be happy."

Itachi frowned, small creases beginning to appear on his forehead. "Tell me if it happens again, alright?"

"Sure!" he chirped. "I don't like it. It makes my head feel weird."

It … it does … Sasuke felt a strange pushing sensation, as if his own body was rejecting him. His body was no longer in his control. He felt himself fading, just like he had in the morning when he'd woken up. Slowly, his own memories were pushed into the background where they struggled for their right to exist.

The room grew to a comfortable silence as Mikoto watched her two sons endearingly. She looked out the window, "it's beautiful outside, isn't it?"

Sasuke nodded, "yeah! Perfect weather for training!"

No. No!

"You know, Itachi, you never keep your promises to him," she said amusedly. "Maybe you should indulge him now, since you have some free time. Your poor brother has been pining after you for a long time. You even spend more time with that anbu partner of yours. He's the one with the Owl mask, isn't he?"

"She," Itachi correctly softly. "She's not my anbu partner, she is just the one I return with after reporting."

"Oh?" Mikoto raised an eyebrow. "So Fukurou is the Owl? I didn't know that."

"Few people do," he admitted. He stood up, brushing off his simple Uchiha clothing. It was strange to see him wear something else but the anbu uniform during the day. Those clothes had probably gathered dust in his closet for weeks. He turned to Sasuke and smiled. "Come, Sasuke. I'll teach you a new shurikenjutsu, alright?"

No! Say no!

Sasuke thought he would burst from joy. He stumbled up to his feet and jumped in excitement, "yeah! Let's go, nii-san! I practiced the last one you gave me for months!"

"Well, let's see how perfect it is then," his brother led him out the backdoor of the house.

Sasuke slowly became aware of the constant struggle he was in, that he had been in since he'd arrived. With his lacking knowledge of fuuinjutsu, he'd failed to fully understand what the seal did and now he was paying for his mistake. Simply existing required force.

As he was pushed to the back, back where his memories were, Sasuke realized that he had nothing left to grasp onto. He kept himself existence and waited for a chance to emerge.

"You've improved a little since we started," Itachi noted two hours later. "But you still need practice." He guided his younger brother's hand into position, adjusting the angle of the kunai it held. The metal glinted in the late evening light.

"Like this?" Sasuke threw the kunai once his position was correct. It embedded itself in one corner of the board they'd set up. He pouted, but his nii-san clapped softly.

"Well done, Sasuke."

"Hmph. Nii-san can do seven at once, and in his blind spots too."

"Nii-san did nothing but practice for five years," Itachi reached down to tap his forehead again and the smaller boy beamed with happiness.

The clearing behind the house was slowly growing dark, but for the first time in months, Itachi-nii didn't have to wake up early the next morning for a mission. For the first time in months, Sasuke had his brother's full focus solely on him. He soaked in every minute of it, his childish mind drunk off elation.

"Watch me do it myself now, nii-san!" He pulled another kunai out of his small pouch and flung it, grinning when it struck a little closer to the centre. It was strange, because he didn't know why. He hadn't practiced that much. Yet his arm felt lighter and more agile, as if throwing kunai was an overly familiar motion.

Itachi raised an eyebrow, seeming slightly impressed with his progress. To Sasuke, who had always seen his brother as a figure of exalted brilliance, that one hint was better than any of the praise Iruka-sensei could offer.

"Will you show me your practice throw?" Sasuke asked excitedly. He unclipped his pouch and held it out for his brother to use.

Itachi sighed, but he tied the kunai pouch to his belt and went to stand in the centre of the clearing.

"Do the one with seven of them, and in both blind spots, nii-san!"

There were eight kunai in the pouch. In one flash of his hands, Uchiha Itachi drew seven, swirling the grips easily into his slight fingers. He didn't need to look around to note each of the targets that had already been laid; they were as familiar to him as his mask and tanto.

Sasuke watched as he leapt into the air, pushing small amounts of chakra into his feet to rise. From his vantage point, his eyes swept across the wooden circles and his hands moved of their own accord, swinging out in sharp movements. They flicked each kunai to its location, and two out to the side, where they would clang against two of the others and nudge each other perfectly into path – into his blind spots.

Itachi's simple performance was mesmerizing. That was the true power of his brother, the ability to take such small, unnoticeable weapons and use them to bring kage to their knees. Even without his Sharingan, Itachi was powerful beyond anything Sasuke's naïve eyes had ever seen. More powerful than his parents; more powerful than the Hokage himself.

Sasuke stood riveted. He barely noticed as each kunai slipped easily into the centers of their targets. His eyes were too busy following Itachi's lithe frame, completely dark against the pale light of the sky. He moved with ease, as if his body was a pencil in an artist's hands, and he landed without making a sound, walking back towards where Sasuke was standing, mouth agape at what he'd seen.

"That was amazing, nii-san!" He yelled.

Itachi smiled fondly. "One day you can do it too, if you practice."

"I will!" The sincerity in his words was unmistakable. "I'll practice every day, for three hours if I have to. For more! Then I can graduate the academy early and everyone will forget about the new minimum graduation age!"

"Yes," the fingers came up to tap at his forehead, and his brother's expression changed. "Train every day. Train whenever you can. Graduate first in your class, because I do not think Sandaime-sama will relinquish his minimum graduation age so easily. Just … do well, Sasuke."

Why was his tone so somber? Sasuke didn't dwell on it; his level of excitement was too high. Instead, he made to ask for chakra training.

Both of them paused at the sound of a sudden drip, a drop of liquid that had fallen onto the grass. Even that sound was loud in the silent clearing, where the birds didn't dare to come. Sasuke looked down to see a small dark spot against a leaf on the ground. With slight confusion, he looked up.

Aniki held his right hand in front of his face, his expression carefully blank. A small bead of red slowly emerged from the space between his finger and thumb, from an almost unnoticeable cut. He watched as the droplet of blood emerged fully, and then pattered down onto the grass, joining the first.

Inside the pouch, the last remaining kunai had an edge tinged with red.

"Ah, I cut myself," Itachi said softly with a slight smile. "I should go ask oka-san to put a bandage on it, those kunai don't look very well-cleaned." His tone was light, dismissive.

Sasuke's mouth was still open. Itachi-nii never made a mistake.

"Let's go back, alright? It's getting dark outside. Oka-san went out to buy vegetables, she will be back soon. Maybe we can help her make dinner."

Out. Get out. Give it back!

He was clawing his way out. The image of Itachi became blurry in his vision as he pushed and forced his way to the surface. The resistance he met with – the resistance of familiarity – was strong. His will was stronger.

Itachi-nii never made a mistake.

It was possible now, but he still wasn't himself. He was only just barely hanging on, pulling his memories up to stand beside the others. Beside, but not above. Not above yet.

"Sasuke? Are you feeling all right? You look pale …" Itachi's blurred hand came closer, reaching for his forehead. Sasuke vaguely registered it. He fought to move. To move back, away from that hand. Away from the hand which had taken everything from him. That had taken his life and wretched it apart until he had but one goal in his childish mind.

Sasuke ran.

He didn't know how long he ran, or where he was going. His vision was still blurred, flashing occasionally with the red of the Sharingan. They tied, fighting for control. He ran out into the streets of the compound, looking around at the few blurry people milling around. At the few children playing late into the evening and the adults walking by.

Get out.

No. I have to go convince aniki to train some more with me. This is the first time he's trained with me in ages, aniki was paying attention to me!

What kind of depraved, childish idiot am I?

Back!

I don't want his attention. I don't want anything to do with him.

I have help, he's hurt. I have a bandage in my book bag, I could help him! Aniki's … never gotten hurt before. Ever. Maybe he's upset about Shisui-nii's death.

He's not. He's thinking about how to kill my clan. He was distracted by those thoughts.

I know I would be distracted if Kaeru died. That would be horrible. Poor aniki …

Sasuke ignored the thoughts running jarringly through his head. They didn't make sense. They weren't supposed to make sense. It was just a side-effect. Did he …

Did he have to live like this? Did he have to force himself to exert consciousness just to exist? Was it him? Was it his own memory? Was he fighting himself, or someone else?

He was in a crowd. There were people around. Some of them were yelling at him to stop running, to stop bumping into them. Their eyes … were different. He stilled, frozen among the moving bodies around him. Someone was discussing the price of tomatoes.

When he turned to the voice, he saw a figure standing by the red fruit. Her dark hair was worn loosely in a tie, allowing strands to fall around her face in a manner that somehow managed to look neat. She held a tomato in one hand, and was talking to the owner of the shop.

Sasuke watched in horror as some of the others wearing the Uchiha fan shot her strange looks as they passed, as if she were placed in a jar for observing. As if she was one of the specimens in Orochimaru's cages. As if oka-san …

He ran towards her. All he knew was that it wasn't oka-san's fault.

Stop it. I've stopped mourning her.

Mourning her? What am I thinking, she's not dead! Oka-san isn't going to die!

"Sasuke?" Mikoto's voice made him turn towards her blurry form. "Sasuke why are you here. Aren't you supposed to be training with Itachi?"

The street fell silent, punctuated only by harsh whispers. Sasuke didn't know what he was seeing. Somehow, the image of the Uchiha clan members that had stopped going about their daily lives was interlaid over one of Orochimaru's subjects. It was in their questioning eyes.

Itachi? Their eyes said. The murderer? The traitor?

Is this how the dobe felt? Is this how Sakura felt?

W-who are they? Why do I know them?

"Sasuke?" His mother's voice was slightly softer, as if she had only just noticed where they were. "Go back to the house with I-your brother, alright?"

He couldn't stand it anymore. The pressure was too much, and their blurry faces struck him repeatedly.

"Aniki didn't kill him!" He yelled, his voice almost breaking with the effort. "Aniki didn't kill Shisui-nii! He's innocent! He's innoc-" he broke in coughs that shook his small form.

"Sasuke!" Mikoto turned him around harshly. "Go back. Stop making a scene."

She was blurry. Now that he was so close, he could see the fine lines of her frown. But the rest of her face was blurry. Her hands were gripping his shoulders. Sasuke pulled apart from her hold and ran, pushing through the crowd in the dim evening light.

"I'm staying here tonight," he stated.

The boy standing in the open doorway was blinking in confusion. He had some sort of panda-bear cap tilted half-way off his head, and was dressed in matching pajamas. Sasuke sighed and pushed past him into the small apartment. It was a decent place, meant for a small family. He knew it had been supplied by the Hokage, and there was no way Naruto would have been able to arrange all that furniture. But it was maintained horribly, and that showed. He stood in front of the doorway and surveyed the place.

For one, sweet moment, everything was silent.

Then, the door shut behind him and a yellow-haired bundle of excitement was whooping and jumping around the sitting room. The floor literally shook with the extent of his excitement. Sasuke watched glumly as he bounded over, shaking his fists in joy.

"We're gonna have a sleepover! This is gonna be so awesome! I've never had a sleepover before! Hey how did you know where I lived?"

"Stop asking me questions," Sasuke sank down onto the couch and cradled his head in his hands. "Sleepover. Sure. Whatever." It was going to be troublesome, but it was necessary.

Naruto presence … Naruto's annoying talk … it all reminded him who he was. The episodes were held at bay when he was with Naruto. Sakura's parents would notice if he stayed too close to her, and he didn't know where Kakashi was, or even if he was still in anbu. Naruto was his only choice.

"So what do people do in sleepovers?" Naruto's blue eyes were suddenly directly in front of his own.

"We sleep. I'll take the couch." Sasuke had had few sleepovers in his childhood, and they were usually at his own house. But he didn't care. A couch was good enough.

"Huh? No way," Naruto pouted. "We have to do fun sleepover stuff first. I've got cards and checkers and – oh do you like ramen? Of course you like ramen, everybody likes ramen! Come on, you haven't eaten dinner, right?" He pulled at Sasuke sleeve.

With a suffering sigh, Sasuke allowed himself to be dragged to the small table in the kitchen, and pulled out a chair. The window revealed that night was falling quickly, with only the flickering streetlights providing light. His parents would begin to search for him soon. He wasn't sure what he planned to say to them.

Good morning, oka-san. I spent the night at my friend's house. You know, that boy otou-san told me to stay the hell away from. We had a sleepover. I suffered all the way through, because I'm almost seventeen and spending time around someone a decade younger than me is infuriating.

He looked on blearily as Naruto grabbed two cups of cup ramen with impossible energy and set some hot water to boil. The boy came over and pushed one of the cups towards him along with a set of chopsticks.

"Here. These ones are limited edition, you know. They're really good," he chirped.

Sasuke looked down at the dried noodles in the cup. Fine. Ramen it was.