Hey guys - sorry, another long wait, but this is a Snape/Alana centric chapter. From this point on they're probably going to start interacting some more. After all, they've been avoiding each other. Hope you likey, and as always reviews are appreciated.
I don't own HP.
Chapter Six – Déjà Vu
Snape concealed his great surprise as Alana barged into his office not long after he'd settled himself there, without knocking and without waiting to see if he was otherwise engaged. But one swift look at her told him she wouldn't much appreciate a lecture on etiquette and politeness right now; she looked livid. Her teeth were set in a tightly clenched jaw, her fists shaking by her sides, and with her hair down and her brow knitted into a deep frown, she looked almost wild.
"Good evening, Professor Cross," he said smoothly, looking back down to the book he had been about to read, barely giving her a second look. "Is something the matter?"
"I'm not at liberty to discuss it with you at this time..." Alana sneered. He paused with a frown, keeping an even temper, knowing it would frustrate her.
"It's all good and well repeating back something I said to you, Professor Cross, but I'm afraid you're going to have to elaborate if you want me to understand you properly."
"Don't act smart. What the hell are you playing at? You were supposed to give me a break down of my report after the lesson and instead you feed me some cock and bull story about 'regulation'..."
"Ah, actually Professor Cross," Snape interrupted. "I never said a word about regulation. You assumed that was why I withheld your report."
"It doesn't bloody matter either way!" she shouted. "You were supposed to tell me but instead you're playing this stupid game."
"Game?"
Alana gave a cry of exasperation; how could he act so coy? "Yes – look, this whole report...inspection business might seem like a joke to you, or maybe just a huge inconvenience. Believe me - the people on the receiving end feel very much the same way. And while you might get some enjoyment out of toying with me, and making me sweat over the whole business, this is my career Snape. This is all I have and I want to do it – so please can you put aside your pettiness and actually judge me according to my capability rather than whether you actually like me or not?"
"If you think the object of my actions was to toy..."
"Of course it was," she snapped, hands on hips as she started another rant. "I knew the second you were given the damn assignment you'd find some way to make this hellish for me. You haven't changed a bit! You're as much the sadistic git today as you were five years ago and...and it isn't fair!"
Her words rung out in the dungeon. Snape clenched his jaw, not moving for the moment as he chewed over what to do next, but once he had decided, he rose quickly, opened his drawer in a fluid movement and pulled out some papers. Alana watched him, a little startled as he moved around the desk wordlessly, his anger rolling off of him in waves, and waited for the bite.
"Your feedback, Professor Cross." When she stared at it, unsure, he handed it to her roughly. "Go ahead – read it. I refuse to talk through it with you. You're a grown woman," he added, sitting down once more, and picking up his book he had cast aside.
"Thank you," she snapped back, wondering why she didn't feel in the least bit triumphant. She had asserted herself and gotten what she wanted, and Merlin it had felt good to call him a git to his face. But for some reason she couldn't shake the feeling that he had let it go too easily, and the words on the papers in her hands would not make her feel alright.
"Return them when you're done," he added, not looking up and talking so coldly Alana shivered. Gaining her resolve, she stormed out with only a little less vigour than she had come in and headed to her rooms to read the dreaded report.
XXXXX
Alana groaned as she lay on her bed and pushed the papers aside. It was worse than she'd feared. A knock at the door made her lift her head, and called out for them to come in. Jenea poked her head around the door and grinned. "How'd the showdown go?"
"I don't even want to think about it," Alana muttered, nursing her temples with her fingers, eyes closed.
"That bad, huh?"
"That good, you mean," Alana replied, the sick feeling in her stomach swelling. "It's a glowing report. And in order to get it, I called him a 'sadistic git' and shouted at him. I accused him of playing mind games, and then he handed me this, knowing full well I'd have to eat my words."
"Ouch," Jenea grimaced, perching on the bed and picking up the papers. "Let's see." She scanned over the report quietly for a few minutes, pulling a few faces and making a few indicative noises until she set them on her lap and looked over her glasses at Alana. "You know you're going to have to say sorry right?"
"Story of my life, as far as Professor Snape is concerned," Alana grumbled, but Jenea didn't push for answers, even if she wanted some. She could see it wasn't the time.
"I'll go in a minute," Alana concluded, sitting up and tucking her hair behind her ears. "Better get it over and done with." Jenea nodded wisely and rose.
"Let me know how it goes," she said, going to the door. "I reckon at this stage either one of you could end up in the Hospital Wing. Snape looked furious when I passed him in the corridor not long ago, so you obviously ticked him off."
"Thanks for the reassurance," Alana sniped sarcastically. "Really helping."
Her friend smiled and closed the door behind her as she left, leaving Alana to throw herself back into her bed and pick up her report again. It was possibly the tenth time she'd read it, just to be sure. She'd prayed it was a hoax, a fake one, when she first looked it over; the sick feeling of dread had trickled slowly down her back as she took in the words. She almost wished he had written a terrible one. Professor Cross has a talent for engaging the attentions of the class, she read, hearing his voice. The success of her method is most likely due to the fact she combines the theory with challenges and activities that strike a chord amongst her students. She encourages pupils, and praises them where it's due. I saw a great amount of respect and admiration in her students for her. It went on in the same fashion. He had documented his conversations with the people he had spoken to. Of course there were few remarks regarding her, but they were little more than improvements. For instance, he'd suggested she hold a test at the end of each week to see if the students had taken in what she'd been teaching, but he'd gone on to say that it would prove beneficial for her to see the results of her efforts. And he also seemed to have a problem with how many points she gave out, but then, he was head of the Slytherin House and Gryffindor were already nearly double points ahead of them.
It was no good, she concluded, rising and sorting herself out. She would have to make amends, quickly. She straightened up the papers, and checked herself in the mirror – she could see the childish fear of having to admit she was wrong to her old Professor behind her eyes. Just like old times. She only hoped he wouldn't notice it.
XXXXX
"Ah, Professor Cross," Severus said coolly when she appeared in his office only a few hours later, slipping through the door rather than storming through it as she had before. "Ready for some humble pie?"
She winced at how cold he was being, but then that was to be expected. She paced over to his desk and handed him the report, clearing her throat and standing up very straight when he took them from her. "I've come to apologise."
"I should think you have," he said slowly, pronouncing each sound of each word harshly.
Alana opened her mouth to speak, paused and held her tongue for the moment. When she had evened her tone and breathing a little, she tried again. "Look, I lost my temper and shouldn't have. I shouldn't have called you a..." He glanced up and she lowered her gaze. "But you shouldn't have kept this from me."
"I should have known you'd find some way to shift the blame, instead of truly admitting you were wrong," Snape smirked.
Alana ignored him. "But you really had no reason to, after all it's not like it was..."
"I kept it because the original copy was in a rough notebook. I copied it out so it was legible and orderly, because I thought you'd appreciate being able to read it," he interjected in a low voice. "Not because I had any desire to 'toy' with you."
"Then why not tell me so," she reasoned, even though that sounded fairly reasonable to her. She remembered his spidery scrawl from when he marked her essays. When he didn't answer she pointed a finger at him. "Because you wanted to make me suffer, just for a bit! Admit it – I've said I'm sorry. The least you can do is take some responsibility."
"So I can ease your conscience? Not likely. You should have learnt to hold your tongue in these past five years." If she could use the past against him, he would do the same, he thought to himself, watching her eyes narrow at him.
Alana fumed. "Fine."
"Wonderful."
"Just great."
"Is that all?" Snape asked. "I'm busy."
She stuck her tongue in her cheek. "I don't give too many points." A muscle twitched in Snape's jaw at her words, as he fought a smirk.
"You must allow me some criticism," he said, his voice softening even if he wouldn't smile. "There was little else I could fault. But I should know by now that anything less than one hundred percent isn't good enough for you."
Alana smiled to herself – that was true enough, but she was happy with this. She sighed heavily. "I'm sorry I lost my temper. And...thank you, for not tearing me to shreds on the report," she said, begrudgingly, knowing how easily it could have gone the other way.
"Whatever you might think of me, Professor Cross," Snape said, looking up and sitting back. "I don't tend to ruin people's careers for the sheer hell of it. I had no reason to give you a bad report; you proved to me that you're a capable teacher. Whether you've reached the rank of 'capable human being' yet is another matter." Alana rolled her eyes. "But seeing as that clearly doesn't affect your ability to lead a class, I can't hold it against you."
"Thank you."
"You've insulted me, and shouted at me, and now apologised and grovelled. Your usual routine is complete. So goodnight," he said finally, indicating he wanted her to go. She didn't deserve the praise he'd given her, but then as she pointed out, he hadn't been completely blameless. Not that he was going to admit it aloud.
Alana smiled at his joke, even though he had delivered it so dryly, it was quite possible he was having another go at her.
"And for the record," Snape said stiffly as she was about to leave. "You might want to curb the reward system. You do give out far too many points."
Alana took a deep breath. "Goodnight, Professor Snape," she uttered firmly.
XXXXX
He hadn't exactly forgiven her, but nor was he intending to hold a grudge. He was determined to be the adult in this whole awful mess. He had expected something of a commotion over his withholding her feedback, but he hadn't expected her to get so damn nasty about it. Still, it was better to know what she really thought of him, Snape reasoned as he closed his book not long after she'd left. Even if it only amounted to a 'sadistic git'. He winced a little as he remembered how she'd yelled that at him. She'd always had that temper, that spark – he'd quite liked it once – but now he realised that without the barriers of student decorum, she was free to do and say what she liked. And that might include things she had always wanted to say to him. Alana had been holding out on him five years ago but she wasn't now.
Still, he hoped she'd been sufficiently humbled by her mistake to not launch at him in such a fashion again. But he doubted it. They'd probably come to blows again soon. It seemed to be the way they worked. He'd only been half joking when he spoke of her 'routine'; their entire acquaintance had amounted to either one of them apologising, sometimes both, after a heated argument. They seemed to have two personalities that were destined to clash.
Perhaps it was a good thing that their little...he struggled for a word of what to call it...attraction...hadn't amounted to anything more than a kiss and a few tender words. If they'd have carried on with a relationship, they'd have only ended up fighting like two old crows, or one of them would be sent to Azkaban for the other's murder.
Snape checked himself mentally as he gathered his things and headed to his chamber. Why was he thinking about it? What did it matter which way things had gone? The damn witch had a way of getting into his thoughts, be them good or bad, and it wasn't appreciated. Not five years ago, and certainly not now.