They found him under one of the desks near the back of the library, near the books containing borderline dark magic. He looked so terrified that Sirius couldn't help but feel some of his anger leak away. Surely, surely, shy little Remus with his heavy books and amber eyes and golden, silver-streaked hair couldn't be the cause of this.
Surely not…
He slipped under the desk and put a hand on Peter's shoulder.
"Oi, Pete," called James. "You alright? What's wrong?"
Peter whimpered. "Is it gone? Is it locked up yet?"
For a moment, Sirius had absolutely no idea as to what he was talking about.
"I can't believe a thing like that was running around Hogwarts with us! What was Dumbledore thinking, letting it into the-"
And then it all became very clear.
He was talking about Remus.
Sirius stared at Peter, his face contorted in horror. How could this be Peter? The Peter that he'd known for two and a half years? The Peter who accompanied them down to the kitchen at 2 in the morning, the Peter who would cheer on Sirius and James at Quidditch matches, standing in the bleachers in his Gryffindor hat and scarf, the Peter who would laugh at every single thing that James said, even if it wasn't funny-
And with that thought, a darker side of Peter made itself apparent in Sirius's mind.
The Peter that had sold them out to McGonagall when she announced that whoever knew who the perpetrators of the Great Flying Desserts Prank were would not be punished for their participation in the prank if they turned the other participants over. The Peter that stood behind James and Sirius, not with them, when they had stepped between Remus and his Slytherin bullies.
The Peter that was cowardly.
The Peter that was prejudiced.
The Peter that wasn't a true Marauder.
And never would be.
Red clouded Sirius's vision, and he grabbed the lapels of Peter's shirt, scrabbling awkwardly to get out from under the table. James grabbed the back of Peter's shirt and…helped…him out.
"You bastard, Peter. You absolute, fucking, bastard, you, you-" James stumbled over his words, trying to find language that was sufficient enough to indicate his complete and utter abhorrence-
Oh, to hell with big words. That was Remus's job.
Speaking of Remus…
James yanked Peter up by his arm-not being particularly gentle, either-and strode out of the library in the direction of the hospital wing, Sirius beside him.
Peter's eyes widened. "No! No, I'm not going near it, you can't make me-"
Sirius glared at him.
Peter shut up.
They made their way to the hospital wing in silence.
Then, James paused.
"Sirius? Did you hear that?"
Sirius cocked his head, listening carefully.
The strange noise came again.
"Definitely not just you, James." Sirius cracked the door open carefully, and then the door fell open the rest of the way as his hand went slack.
Remus was on his hands and knees near the door, a disgusting mixture of blood and bile splattering onto the floor in front of him. He looked up, watery amber eyes connecting with horrified stormy grey ones.
Sirius couldn't believe it. What the hell was going on? Remus had been unconscious, nearly dead, and was now awake, and had apparently moved.
And was-quite obviously-in a lot of pain.
Sirius jolted himself awake and moved forward, reaching out a hand that he had no idea what he was going to do with except for the fact that Remus was in pain, Remus was in pain and Sirius couldn't do anything to help him-
But Remus flinched. Remus flinched back and in that moment, both James and Sirius recoiled because Remus, their Remus, was scared of them.
And that drove shards of ice into their hearts.
"Remus?" Sirius tried hesitantly, crouching down carefully. "Remus, are you with us?"
Remus…flickered. There was no other way to put it. He just…flickered.
Flickered between the wolf and the boy.
Flickered between the side that wanted friends so, so badly and the side that just didn't want to hurt anyone anymore.
Flickered between the side that was so, so tired and the side that had to keep runningrunningrunningrunningrunning because that was all he knew how to do, because that was all he could do to stop being hurt.
Flickered between the Marauder and the monster.
Flickered between whole and broken.
Sirius crept over to the boy who was just kneeling there, his hands on his knees turned upwards as though pleading, his eyes staring at nothing, and his robes becoming increasingly stained with blood. He put a gentle hand on his shoulder, attempting to get his attention, but this simple movement appeared to push Remus over the edge. He recoiled sharply and started babbling.
"Please-please-they'll kill me-my father-ministry-silver ax-please-Romulus-so sorry, sorry, sorry, please-"
Remus was crying, now, and Sirius's heart was clenching so tightly it was painful. He was dimly aware that Peter had left the room, running to find a teacher, probably, and he was wishing that Remus would do anything, anything else-punch him, run, yell, anything, just so that Sirius and James did not have to sit here, helpless, and watch a strong boy be torn to pieces by his demons.
Sirius hesitated, and then, completely at a loss for what else to do, simply leaned over and hugged him, drawing the younger, skinnier boy into his arms. James leaned over and did the same on Remus's other side. The lycanthrope tensed, shaking, and tried futilely to get out of the grip. But James and Sirius remained, and eventually, Remus's body relaxed, slowly.
He had been fighting for a long, long, time.
It wasn't worth it anymore.
And finally, finally, darkness overtook him.
James and Sirius shared a panicked glance as they felt Remus go completely limp.
"Come on," hissed James. "We're going to have to carry him."
Sirius carefully slid both his hands under Remus's arms, and James took hold of his feet. Gently, they lifted him over to his bed. Remus moaned, and Sirius physically flinched at how much pain this must be causing his friend, even while unconscious.
A few moments after getting Remus situated on the bed, Madam Pomfrey came rushing in, her arms full of potion bottles.
"I was simply getting some more blood-replenishing potions from Professor Slughorn, and then-oh, goodness, what on earth happened?"
Without waiting for an answer, she bustled over to Remus, brushing the two boys aside.
"Right-Mr. Black- fetch me some fresh bandages from the cabinet over there, if you would," she called distractedly.
"Um-yeah, alright," Sirius replied, and, running over to the cabinets, paused.
"Erm…which cabinet-oh, fuck it." Sirius started banging the cabinet doors open and closed, looking for the one that had bandages in it.
"MR. BLACK! Would you please keep the noise-"
"AHA! Found it!"
Madam Pomfrey pinched the bridge of her nose and grabbed the bandages that Sirius was offering, hastily redressing and re-bandaging the reopened wounds.
Sirius and James felt slightly useless.
After a few tense moments, during which the matron threatened to throw them both out of the infirmary approximately half a dozen times, she sat back and relaxed, wiping a bloodstained hand on her apron.
"He'll be alright, you two. I'll be in my office. Call me if there is the slightest change in his condition, alright?"
The two boys nodded wordlessly.
"I'm afraid that all we can do now is wait," Madam Pomfrey said gently, and with that, she disappeared into her office.
And so they did.
A/N. Ok, I am fully aware that you are all probably running after me with pitchforks and torches, right now, but PLEASE DON'T HURT ME! I am so, so sorry for not updating for…what, four months now? Ouch. Well, anyways, now it's summer vacation, and I'm thinking only one or two more chapters left. I'm also thinking of doing a sequel in which Peter outs Remus's werewolf status to Gryffindor house, titled Lions Stand Together (or something like that). Please review with ideas!
Also, here are my replies to anonymous reviewers who I couldn't track down.
Meow: I love you. Ok? I love you, and am so, so sorry for not updating sooner. You are one of the few who has stuck with me and my awful writing skills since the very first chapter. I hope that you enjoy this one if you're still checking on it!
LaLo: Hey girl, love you! Not sure if you're going to check back on this, but if you do, then I hope you enjoy it, and have a good summer! See you next year!
Ok guys, since it's summer, I'll probably be updating more regularly now, rather than the spasmodic updates I was giving you before, as long as I a) don't get writer's block, and b) DO get a lot of reviews!
Reviewers get to hug Moony!