Author's Note: Anybody see that Fox music video going around? Google "What's the Fox' Say." Find a YouTube video by Ylvis – The Fox. Insanity. And it spawned this nonsense. Read on at your own risk.
Thanks as always to the ever patient Marla for the beta.
Zzz
Diego was prepared for anything when he raced into the kitchen at Victoria's scream. Victoria hid behind him as he prepared for battle and scanned the kitchen for a threat.
Victoria wrapped her arms around his waist from behind and Diego wanted to turn into her embrace, but then he remembered her scream. "What happened?"
"It went over there!" Victoria pointed a shaky finger at a cluttered corner, but Diego didn't see anything.
He took a step forward, but Victoria grabbed his jacket. "Don't!"
Diego turned to her, still keeping an eye on the menacing corner. He put one hand on her shoulder as the other cradled her cheek, his thumb attempting to stroke the fear from her face. "I'll take care of it, whatever it is. What scared you?"
Victoria tried to remember why she screamed, but Diego was being so gentle. Now she felt silly. "I don't know. I saw… something run into the corner."
Diego grinned. "Something?"
Victoria swatted his hand away. "It looked like a fox."
Diego chuckled. "I doubt El Zorro could hide behind those boxes."
Victoria slapped his shoulder, watching the corner carefully. "Don't laugh. It might bite!"
Diego shook his head as she finally let him approach the corner. "Yes, I'm sure Zorro would love to nibble on you," Diego mumbled.
"What?"
Diego glanced back at her, the picture of innocence. "Oh, nothing."
Diego moved some boxes and discovered the tiny intruder huddled in the corner. Diego knelt and spoke in soothing tones as he slowly cradled the baby fox in his arms. He stood and stepped toward Victoria, but she stepped away.
"Oh surely you're not afraid of a baby fox. You get along fine with the man-version."
Victoria flushed as she glared at Diego, then glanced at the baby again. "He's just a baby?"
Diego stroked under the fox's neck. "Just a baby. See? Listen. He's harmless."
"I've never heard that sound before." Victoria cautiously approached, and Diego held the baby animal out for her to see. Her hand hesitated, then finally one finger stroked the top of the furry head.
"See? He's harmless. El Zorro loves it when you pet him."
Victoria flushed again as she met Diego's wicked eyes. She crossed her arms. "If he's harmless, we can name him Diego."
Diego shook his head, his smile sad and wistful. "But you never pet me."
Victoria rolled her eyes and turned away. Before she took two steps, she turned back and stretched to rub Diego's head briskly. She smiled at his messy hair. "There."
Diego smiled broadly as she turned away, brushing his hair back into place, secretly thrilled at the playful atmosphere. He held up the baby fox, staring into its masked face. "She's no longer afraid, little fox. Now she wants to name you Diego. How ironic."
He blushed when he noticed Victoria watching him. "Ironic how?"
Diego laughed nervously and tucked the fox back to his chest. "Oh, nothing."
Victoria watched him for a moment, her finger tapping her lip. She stilled when Diego's eyes fell to her lips. She took a few steps toward him, but ignored the fox.
"You said it was ironic. Naming the fox Diego is ironic?"
Diego cleared his throat and thought fast. "No, I thought you being afraid of a baby fox was ironic, considering you're not afraid of the dangerous outlaw by the same name."
Victoria slowly shook her head as her eyes sparkled with mischief. "That's not ironic."
Diego held up the fox as a distraction, glancing nervously between Victoria and the baby fox. "Don't you think we look alike? It's ironic he's now named after me."
Victoria scowled. "That's not irony, either."
"Ah." Diego shrugged and stepped into her personal space. "Maybe because once, a fox named me."
And then, El Zorro took his nibble.
Zzz
Author's Note: I'm exhausted. I can't be blamed for the silliness which crops into my brain. However, if you liked it, please review.