AN: I sed stup fflaming I no his nam iznt johnny bald dat wuz a mistak!1111 if u dnot lik de story den u kan go skrew urself!11111 U SUK!111111
"Hi." I said flirtily. "Im Idnigo Payne da new student." I shok my pale handz wif their blak noil polish wif him.
"Da name's Damien." he said. "But u kan call me Cthulu. Datz ma middle nam"
We shok hands. "Well come on we have 2 go upstairs." Cthulu said. I followed him. "Hey Cthulu…..do u happen to be a fan of Gren Day?" (sinz mcr and evinezenz and dvda dont exist yet den) I asked.
"Oh my fuking mod, how did u know?" Cthulu gasped. "actually I like gc a lot too."(geddit coz gc did that song I just wanna live that's ounded really 80s) (Non-Parody AN: Whatever Tara just said made no sense whatsoever.)
"omg me too!" I replied happily.
"guess what they have a concert in lark's pond." cthulu whispered.
"lark's pond?" I asked.
"yeah that's what they used to call it in these time before it became Stark's Pond in 2000." he told me all sekrtivly. "and theres a really cool shop called Hot-"
'topic!" I finshed, happy again.
He froned confusedly. "noo its called Hot Tamaly." He smiled skrtvli again. "then in 1998 dey changd it to hot topic." he moaned.
"ohh." now everything was making sense for me. "so is sheeluh here?" I shouted.
"uh-huh." he looked at his black nails. "im in nynth grade'"
"OMfH SHME TOO!" I SHRIEDKED.
"u go to this skull?"(geddit cos im goffik) he asked.
"yah that's why im here im NEW." I SMELLED HAPPili.
Suddenly sheela da hall monyter ran in and started shredding at us angrily. "NO TALKING IN THE HALLS!" she had short red hair and was wearing a polo shirt from Amrikan ogle outfters. "STUPID GOFFS!"
cthulu rolled his eyes. "shis so mean to us goffs and punks just becose we're in nainth grad and we're not preps."
I turned around angrily. "actually I fink mebe its becos ur da barke lord's sun."
"wtf?" he asked angrily.
"oh nuffin." I said sweetly.
then suddenlyn…. the floor opened. "OMFD NO I SCEAMED AS I FEEL DOWN. everyone looked At ME weirdly."
"hey where r u goin?" cthulu asked as I fell.
I got out of the hole n it was bak in the pensive in shef's classroom. steela wuz dere. "sheela I think I just met u." I said.
"oh yeah I rememba that." sheela said, trying to be all goffik.
shef came in. "hey dis is my classroom wait wtf idnigo what da hell r u doing?"
:"um." I looked at him.
"oh yeaH I forgot bout that."
"wth how?" I screamed forgetting he was a teacher for a second. but hes a goff so its ok.
shif looked sad. "um I was drinking wait gain 4000." he started to cry black tears of depression. steela didn't know about them.
"hey r u crying tears of blood?" she asked curiously, tuching a tear.
"fuck off!" we both said and steela took her hand away.
shif started crying again in his chair, sobbing limpid tears. "omft idnigo…I think im addicted to Wait Gain 4000."
AN: SEE U FOKKING PREPZ GO FOK URSELXXZ DATZ SERUS ISSUZ 2O GO 2 HELL!1111112